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Spergin Morlock
Aug 8, 2009

Civilized Fishbot posted:

sincere question: am i an idiot if i believe that epstein actually hung himself. I don't think anyone else came in to kill him, i think it was 100% predictable that he would try to kill himself given the chance. the conspiracy is how he was given the opportunity - allowing someone in that situation to kill themselves is the same as sending someone to kill them. so there's still a cabal and conspiracy here but i think an assassin is unnecessary. is that dumb

basically I think "who made sure epstein was allowed to die" and "who killed epstein" are equivalent in any meaningful sense

No, it seems as likely as any of the possibilities. The murder cop definitely tried to kill him a few weeks ago though

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Prav
Oct 29, 2011

Civilized Fishbot posted:

sincere question: am i an idiot if i believe that epstein actually hung himself. I don't think anyone else came in to kill him, i think it was 100% predictable that he would try to kill himself given the chance. the conspiracy is how he was given the opportunity - allowing someone in that situation to kill themselves is the same as sending someone to kill them. so there's still a cabal and conspiracy here but i think an assassin is unnecessary. is that dumb

basically I think "who made sure epstein was allowed to die" and "who killed epstein" are equivalent in any meaningful sense

why would he kill himself instead of fingering the co-conspirators who failed to have his back and betrayed him

Bear Retrieval Unit
Nov 5, 2009

Mudslide Experiment

Bip Roberts posted:

I'm sad Lyndon larouche is dead for all this

I'm not because he was a nazi so gently caress him

Spergin Morlock
Aug 8, 2009

There's a fingering joke that could be made here but I will refrain

Prav
Oct 29, 2011

Spergin Morlock posted:

There's a fingering joke that could be made here but I will refrain

we appreciate this minor gesture

Civilized Fishbot
Apr 3, 2011

Prav posted:

why would he kill himself instead of fingering the co-conspirators who failed to have his back and betrayed him

because he used to be one of the world's most powerful people, and now he's going to be locked up in a lovely box for the rest of his life. nobody will ever believe a word he says, and he has an unknown window of time when he's allowed to kill himself - after that, there's not a single good thing or opportunity facing him for the rest of his life. he's been completely cut off by all of society. and this is a guy who once dreamt of immortality and global domination at the level of a bond villain.

what's he gonna do, say clinton or trump was in on it? that's already public record and nothing's happened. the words of a reviled pedophile won't change it.

comedy option: knowing that the cabal is sending assassins after him, he infers that he's been taken off suicide watch in order to facilitate his death. he stages a suicide attempt in order to get back into the safety of suicide watch, but actually kills himself by accident

Civilized Fishbot has issued a correction as of 21:29 on Aug 11, 2019

Rated PG-34
Jul 1, 2004




Epstein was bros before hos to the very end you see

Prav
Oct 29, 2011

Civilized Fishbot posted:

because he used to be one of the world's most powerful people, and now he's going to be locked up in a lovely box for the rest of his life. nobody will ever believe a word he says, and he has an unknown window of time when he's allowed to kill himself - after that, there's not a single good thing or opportunity facing him for the rest of his life. he's been completely cut off by all of society.

what's he gonna do, say clinton or trump was in on it? that's already public record and nothing's happened. the words of a reviled pedophile won't change it.

comedy option: knowing that the cabal is sending assassins after him, he infers that he's been taken off suicide watch in order to facilitate his death. he stages a suicide attempt in order to get back into the safety of suicide watch, but actually kills himself by accident

lol if you believe a word of this

How Darwinian
Feb 27, 2011
I knew this before, but it just popped back into my head that Epstein was on the council of foreign relations and the trilateral commission. Haha, cracking and pinging and slowly losing track of reality!

https://www.counterpunch.org/2019/07/15/jeffrey-epstein-and-the-collapse-of-europe/

Civilized Fishbot
Apr 3, 2011

Prav posted:

lol if you believe a word of this

i mean, why wouldn't jeffrey epsten kill himself? and if you're The Cabal, why not try letting him kill himself before you send a faceless man to infiltrate the prison and stage a suicide? same result, much cleaner method

Gunshow Poophole
Sep 14, 2008

OMBUDSMAN
POSTERS LOCAL 42069




Clapping Larry

Civilized Fishbot posted:

i mean, why wouldn't jeffrey epsten kill himself? and if you're The Cabal, why not try letting him kill himself before you send a faceless man to infiltrate the prison and stage a suicide? same result, much cleaner method

because he's a coward and a narcissist

Civilized Fishbot
Apr 3, 2011

Gunshow Poophole posted:

because he's a coward and a narcissist

you think that makes him less likely to kill himself? narcissistic personality disorder is positively correlated with suicide

Pf. Hikikomoriarty
Feb 15, 2003

RO YNSHO


Slippery Tilde

lol at this guy who thinks he ever lived in a reality based world

Ansar Santa
Jul 12, 2012

It doesn't matter a bit whether he was murdered or allowed to kill himself. The result is objectively the same: dead men tell no tales.

Prav
Oct 29, 2011

assassinated

Lastgirl
Sep 7, 1997


Good Morning!
Sunday Morning!

Civilized Fishbot posted:

you think that makes him less likely to kill himself?

a wealthy man checked off everything on his bucket list before he hit 80 and his egg dick work no more :qq:

Epstein doesn't need to suffer the consequences of his actions, he's at peace forever.

Lastgirl
Sep 7, 1997


Good Morning!
Sunday Morning!

Civilized Fishbot posted:

you think that makes him less likely to kill himself? narcissistic personality disorder is positively correlated with suicide

then why hasn't ol Donnie Trump killed himself

Ace of Baes
Jul 7, 1977
Imagine believing he killed himself lmao

Gunshow Poophole
Sep 14, 2008

OMBUDSMAN
POSTERS LOCAL 42069




Clapping Larry

Civilized Fishbot posted:

you think that makes him less likely to kill himself? narcissistic personality disorder is positively correlated with suicide

I didn't say he has NPD I siad he's a narcissist.

old.flv
Jan 28, 2017

A good lad who likes his Anna's.

Prav posted:

why would he kill himself instead of fingering the co-conspirators who failed to have his back and betrayed him

maybe they threatened someone he actually cared about

Mariana Horchata
Jun 30, 2008

College Slice
swap theory

Bear Retrieval Unit
Nov 5, 2009

Mudslide Experiment
I just had a galaxy brain epiphany. modi killed epstein to distract the world from Kashmir.

Civilized Fishbot
Apr 3, 2011

Lastgirl posted:

then why hasn't ol Donnie Trump killed himself

because he's never lost all power and respect ever afforded to him, culminating in an indefinite prison sentence and humiliating trial. if pelosi suddenly went hardcore and threw trump in jail, and trump was actually treated like a prisoner, he'd try to kill himself for sure.

basically i think this matters because the question of "who snuck into the prison and staged epstein's death" could work as a pretty juicy distraction from "who took him off suicide watch" even though that's an easier and firmer lead

Civilized Fishbot has issued a correction as of 21:42 on Aug 11, 2019

Rated PG-34
Jul 1, 2004




old.flv posted:

maybe they threatened someone he actually cared about

they threatened to crack his egg penis into so many pieces that all of Clinton’s men couldn’t put it back together again

Prav
Oct 29, 2011

old.flv posted:

maybe they threatened someone he actually cared about

himself?

gh0stpinballa
Mar 5, 2019


ranting with epstein brain and dyslexia, sorry fam. will amend.

Ansar Santa
Jul 12, 2012

I doesn't fuckin' matter. Assassinated or allowed to kill himself, he's dead and the pedophile cabal lives.

Wheeee
Mar 11, 2001

When a tree grows, it is soft and pliable. But when it's dry and hard, it dies.

Hardness and strength are death's companions. Flexibility and softness are the embodiment of life.

That which has become hard shall not triumph.

thing is it doesn't matter

if he killed himself it was only because he was deliberately allowed to

gh0stpinballa
Mar 5, 2019

Rocks posted:

I do think it’s really weird that they can’t even tell us the following:

- if he was in his cell alone when he died
- how he hung himself, and with what
- did he have any cell mates when he died
- how did the guards not see it happen

like any of this could have been cleared up within an hour of his death, but it’s not... why???????

iirc within an hour of the last attempt we knew the who, what, and when, including who the cellmate was and what the injuries were. so yeah, this is really loving weird.

Lastgirl
Sep 7, 1997


Good Morning!
Sunday Morning!

Civilized Fishbot posted:

the question of "who snuck into the prison and staged epstein's death" could work as a pretty juicy distraction from "who took him off suicide watch" even though that's an easier and firmer lead

this theory is insane

also can i see credentials wrt your expert psychoanalysis~ :h:

fits my needs
Jan 1, 2011

Grimey Drawer
https://twitter.com/BagageHandeler/status/1160585709624987648?s=20

Lastgirl
Sep 7, 1997


Good Morning!
Sunday Morning!

Prav posted:

himself?

epstein killed himself to stop epstein from killing himself

old.flv
Jan 28, 2017

A good lad who likes his Anna's.

Prav posted:

himself?

let no brain go un-cracked and pinged

Victory Position
Mar 16, 2004

Civilized Fishbot posted:

basically i think this matters because the question of "who snuck into the prison and staged epstein's death" could work as a pretty juicy distraction from "who took him off suicide watch" even though that's an easier and firmer lead

the answer to this is "something who isn't a billionaire" and the answer to that is someone who works in the Department of Corrections who isn't a billionaire

Lastgirl
Sep 7, 1997


Good Morning!
Sunday Morning!
the fact that multiple takes converged on this is just the same as of every other murder/suicide in modern american history and then it just becomes normalized and obfuscated and handwaved off as insane while the media makes sure to gaslight you that it was a suicide and business resumes as normal while the police state expands and the government state sanctioned kidnapping continues at random to kill you with impunity while they encourage white supremacist domestic terrorism.

JFK obviously killed himself and

Victory Position
Mar 16, 2004

John Fitzgerald Kennedy, modern day Casanova, arranged for himself to be shot multiple times during his Dallas motorcade in order to prevent his wife from finding out about an extramarital affair.

Civilized Fishbot
Apr 3, 2011

Lastgirl posted:

this theory is insane

also can i see credentials wrt your expert psychoanalysis~ :h:

credentials for what? saying it's pretty obvious that an extremely crazy guy who's lost everything would try to kill himself?

sleeptalker
Feb 17, 2011

gh0stpinballa posted:

ranting with epstein brain and dyslexia, sorry fam. will amend.

It was the only thing wrong with an otherwise good post and I mostly wanted to quote it.

Lastgirl
Sep 7, 1997


Good Morning!
Sunday Morning!

Victory Position posted:

John Fitzgerald Kennedy, modern day Casanova, arranged for himself to be shot multiple times during his Dallas motorcade in order to prevent his wife from finding out about an extramarital affair.

he owned Jackie O because now she would look like an ultra bitch indecorously shaming a dead man

died a hero before turning into a villain for the patriarchy

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Lastgirl
Sep 7, 1997


Good Morning!
Sunday Morning!
shame on epstein's victims seeking justice for an already dead man

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