/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Pick posted:

I would definitely want to set some ground rules.

Like ramps.

# ? May 10, 2017 04:27

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# ? Jun 6, 2024 10:13

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO: Feb 28, 1985

Pretty sure he had disabled access signs everywhere and that didn't help.

# ? May 10, 2017 04:30

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

i do a bunch of lapidary stuff and there's not much guesswork about it for actual trained eyes, it's all pretty much right there to see as soon as you rub some spit on it. there's plenty of maybes for people who hoard random gravel in the hopes someone'll come along and tell them they've stumbled across the Hope Diamond and are millionaires now though, but diamonds don't form in that kind of rock and they wouldn't know how to cut it if they had one.

we're still in this analogy, somehow

There are tons of stories of women who get into relationships with guys like him, and they always say "And I was warned but I didn't listen because I thought I was special and I was different, and I had what it took for it to be different for me" and I get that they say that, but I really am special and that's part of what makes it hard to generalize off their experiences. It's hard to accept that maybe in this respect you're not that special and that it would turn out the same way it did for other people who were in your same situation.

I sometimes think that the reason that this happens so often to people who are/were in conservation biology is you're trained to believe in the long shot, that things will be like the golden lion tamarin and not the baiji, even though you know in your heart of hearts that there are going to be more stories like the baiji than that of the golden lion tamarin, and it's not all the industrial fervor of the Chinese to blame. I feel like Hugh was my panda.

Pick fucked around with this message at 04:36 on May 10, 2017

# ? May 10, 2017 04:32

dudeness: Mar 5, 2010; Cat Army; Fallen Rib

Me [late-20s M] with my MESSY Brother [mid-20s M] and his GF [mid-20s F] Am I a horrible Person? Non-Romantic

quote:

I'm using a throwaway account...

I am late 20s guy, and my brother is mid-20s, and he is a MESS! Oscar the Grouch from Sesame Street would call Consuela from Family Guy to clean up his place, and she would then say in her way "NOOOooooo..."

Crap, upon crap, upon more crap, upon more useless crap, upon dirty dishes, upon more crap. One would need a bleeping geologist to sort through all the strata he's built up.

I'm not going to lie, I'm the neatest, and cleanest out of my siblings and I. I've taken the Japanese style of Washitsu to a whole new level that would make a Zen Master agoraphobic, I'm so neat and clean.

My brother's lack of cleanliness drives me up the bleeping wall my entire life.

Next comes his girlfriend who has entered the picture.

I met her over Thanksgiving recently, and I hate to admit it, but I'm overjoyed, and dancing on the inside with happiness at the prospect of someone else taking him and his mess far, far away from me.

She seems decent enough, a good looking enough, but honestly I don't really care about her and my brother's happiness. The only thing that I care about is that she's going to take my brother's mess away! My happiness for them is a distant second to the prospect of me not having to deal with my brother's mess anymore!

We can dance if we want to!

We can leave your friends behind

'Cause your friends don't dance and if they don't dance

Well, they're no friends of mine

His mess is going to be someone else's problem now! I almost feel sorry for his new girlfriend, she doesn't know what kind of mess she's getting herself into...

I'm almost ready to just say to her: "Hellllllloooo My Future-Sister-in-Law!" With a big car-salesman grin on my face as I wrap my arm around her shoulder. "Let's get that ring on your finger, and find you two a nice apartment to live in!! I think there are some openings in the Himalayan Mountains! Or how about the Australian Outback! Welcome to la familia!"

tl;dr: Am I a horrible person because I'm overjoyed at the prospects of my messy brother's girlfriend taking him and his messy-ways far far away from me?

Is there a word for someone that makes a legitimate complain but they do it in such a way that you suddenly don't give a poo poo?

If only his post was more empty like a Washitsu

# ? May 10, 2017 04:33

Blue Train: Jun 17, 2012

Pick posted:

"And I was warned but I didn't listen because I thought I was special and I was different, and I had what it took for it to be different for me" and I get that they say that, but I really am special

Lol

# ? May 10, 2017 04:39

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

the spit part was literal btw that pretty much works for everything

My [21 F] dad [54 M] flirts with almost every girl he meets, even those my age and slightly younger. I want it to stop but he isn't the type to negotiate.

quote:

For starters, my dad and I are really close. We don't have a bad relationship so I don't want anyone to think I hate him and want to cut him out of my life.
But ever since my mom died several years ago, he's been extremely promiscuous and generally creepy.

He's had two actual girlfriends so far (one of which he cheated on multiple times) and he would break up with them at least once a week because he'd find every single minor thing to get mad about. But what's worse is that while he was with them, he'd regularly hand out business cards to waitresses, random women on the street, etc. He pretty much only wants to sleep with them, which he has told me many times.

He will also catcall women and lick his lips at them when he passes by them, sometimes even following them around the store (or wherever we are at the time). He's already wrecked the car once by staring at a woman.

I just don't even know where I am going with this. It grosses me out that he flirts with girls (and has slept with girls) who are the same age as me.

I try to talk to him about it, believe me, but he gets really pissed when I bring it up. I can't argue without him getting extremely petty.

Maybe I'm just upset that I've wanted a step mother for so long to have someone to bond with, but as soon as he gets serious with a girl, he doesn't commit. I know it's selfish to think that, and it is something I am trying to work on.

He says because he is a single man, he can do whatever he wants, but I think driving around my college campus staring at girls MY AGE is creepy, even if they are of age.

I am definitely starting to worry that one day, it won't be a girl of age, and he will make a mistake and flirt with her. Hell, he's even stated himself he would kill a man his age who flirts with me (a joke, but still...).

I just want to know if I am justified in my feelings. Is it wrong what he is doing (obviously it's legal)

# ? May 10, 2017 04:40

WrenP-Complete: Jul 27, 2012

Pick posted:

There are tons of stories of women who get into relationships with guys like him, and they always say "And I was warned but I didn't listen because I thought I was special and I was different, and I had what it took for it to be different for me" and I get that they say that, but I really am special and that's part of what makes it hard to generalize off their experiences. It's hard to accept that maybe in this respect you're not that special and that it would turn out the same way it did for other people who were in your same situation.

I sometimes think that the reason that this happens so often to people who are/were in conservation biology is you're trained to believe in the long shot, that things will be like the golden lion tamarin and not the baiji, even though you know in your heart of hearts that there are going to be more stories like the baiji than that of the golden lion tamarin, and it's not all the industrial fervor of the Chinese to blame. I feel like Hugh was my panda.

Completely seriously, you are special and amazing. Think about what kind of incredible, kind, beautiful relationship/family/world you could build with someone working just as hard as you. Someone with different gifts, but someone just as dedicated.

# ? May 10, 2017 04:46

Agentdark: Dec 30, 2007; Mom says I'm the best painter she's ever seen. Jealous much?

Pick posted:

There are tons of stories of women who get into relationships with guys like him, and they always say "And I was warned but I didn't listen because I thought I was special and I was different, and I had what it took for it to be different for me" and I get that they say that, but I really am special and that's part of what makes it hard to generalize off their experiences. It's hard to accept that maybe in this respect you're not that special and that it would turn out the same way it did for other people who were in your same situation.

I sometimes think that the reason that this happens so often to people who are/were in conservation biology is you're trained to believe in the long shot, that things will be like the golden lion tamarin and not the baiji, even though you know in your heart of hearts that there are going to be more stories like the baiji than that of the golden lion tamarin, and it's not all the industrial fervor of the Chinese to blame. I feel like Hugh was my panda.

Do you have a fuzzy, lovable dog with a dumb little doggy grin. Because if you don't, you should.

# ? May 10, 2017 04:46

Blue Train: Jun 17, 2012

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

the spit part was literal btw that pretty much works for everything

My [21 F] dad [54 M] flirts with almost every girl he meets, even those my age and slightly younger. I want it to stop but he isn't the type to negotiate.

Coal dad

# ? May 10, 2017 04:48

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO: Feb 28, 1985

I thought she was 17 or something but 21. Also your dad saying he's only dtf? So many of these are about weird boundary issues.

# ? May 10, 2017 04:49

DragQueenofAngmar: Dec 29, 2009; You shall not pass!

well this isnt good

I [29m] am punishing myself over a sense of shame regarding my shortcomings and mistakes. This includes a no-contact thing I'm doing with some friends and my therapist. I'm confused and torn right now and could use some feedback

quote:

So, I just recently started a new job, but I�m kind of, well�ashamed of it. It�s not a bad job or anything. But it�s definitely not where I expected or wanted to be at this point in my life. It�s got me thinking about how much I�ve screwed up academically and professionally over the last 12 years. I mean, I finished college and grad school (at two prestigious universities, no less), but I basically spent much of my time goofing off, and in fact almost got expelled from college for low grades at one point. I basically had to be dragged kicking and screaming through grad school. Professionally, I haven�t done much to be proud of and wasn�t really a stellar employee at my last job. I would say that I�m pretty smart and capable, I do have a pretty solid skill-set, and I have plenty of experience. But my career is definitely not where I want it to be right now. My brother, who�s 7 years younger than me and finished both college and grad school (at more prestigious universities than the ones I went to) within 5 years, is definitely waaaaay ahead of where I�ve ever been, both academically and professionally.
Without going into too much detail, this job has really triggered in me a deep sense of shame over my academic and professional shortcomings. I definitely plan to do my best at it, and I have no reason to believe I won�t. But I�m thinking that, in order to make up for the last 12 years of fuckups, I need to deprive myself of a few things. I think of it as well-deserved self-punishment for letting myself fall this far. My plan is to focus on this job, and nothing else.
However, I�ve also been thinking a lot about how, well�I seem to be forgettable to a lot of people socially. There�s a lot to unpack here - too much for this post. But it seems like most of my friendships are pretty one-sided, and I seem to be the one �driving� them. If I�m not actively interacting with someone - whether it�s in person, online, over text, etc. - then it seems like that person just�forgets I exist. Don�t get me wrong, I�m able to do reasonably well in social situations. But the �friendships� I form in those settings tend to be pretty one-sided. It�s almost like I�m sort of sideshow attraction at these events. Even if/when I initiate contact with a friend, it seems like I�m the one always driving the conversation. Friends rarely, if ever, initiate contact out of the blue with me. I don�t blame them. I blame myself. I rationalize this by telling myself I don't deserve meaningful friendships, much less romantic relationships.
So there�s this one meetup (I�d rather not go into specifics, for anonymity�s sake) I go to every week with a couple of friends. I�ve been going to it for about 3 years now and I always enjoy myself at those meetups. I think I�ve made some pretty good, close friends through it. But I�ve decided to basically cut off contact with them for a few weeks. I�ve stopped going to the meet ups and I�ve stopped texting them. Part of it is out of this desire to punish myself for my academic and professional failures. Part of it is out of shame. Part of it is out of anger - not at them, but at myself. Part of it is because I genuinely want to see if they�ll notice or care.
Lo and behold, I actually did get a text from one of those friends a few days ago checking up on me. And this is one with whom I�ve actually had some pretty close and heavy conversations. And now it�s triggered some real confusion in me. Part of me wants to continue this no-contact out of self-punishment and shame over my professional and academic shortcomings. Part of me wants to go back to the meetups and talk about what�s bothering me with that friend. Part of me feels like I don�t deserve to be able to talk about my shortcomings and shame with anyone. Part of me thinks that this friend only texted me to be polite and doesn't really care. And part of me feels so ashamed that I�d even run an experiment like this that I feel like I don�t deserve these friends or these meetups.
I�m running a similar experiment, by the way, with my therapist, who I�ve been seeing her every week for a few years. I�ve been doing it because (1) I feel like I don�t deserve the relief therapy gives me because I�ve hosed up so much academically and professionally and (2) to see if she�ll notice or care. I did get a text from her a few weeks ago basically asking me if I�m okay, telling me that she has an obligation to make sure I�m okay. I replied that I was fine, but that was it.
So I don�t know what to do. Should I just give up on the no-contact thing? Should I see how long I can take it? Has anyone been in a similar situation? What would you do if you were in my place? I'm feeling pretty torn up for a number of different reasons right now.
tl;dr: My new job has triggered a deep sense of shame over my academic and professional shortcomings. I also feel frustrated over my inability to form "balanced" friendships and social connections, and I see that as yet another personal shortcoming. I'm trying to no-contact some friends who I see at a regular meetup to see if they notice or care that I'm gone. One of them reached out to me a week ago to check on me. Now I feel confused and torn as to what to do. My head is a whirlwind of shame, loneliness, and self-hatred.

# ? May 10, 2017 04:53

christmas boots: Oct 15, 2012; To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out; Biscuit Hider

Realtalk: everybody here deserves a healthy relationship with a person that loves and cherishes them and can do better than a person who treats them terribly no matter how badly they post on these forums.

# ? May 10, 2017 04:56

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO: Feb 28, 1985

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

So, I just recently started a new job, but I’m kind of, well…ashamed of it. It’s not a bad job or anything. But it’s definitely not where I expected or wanted to be at this point in my life. It’s got me thinking about how much I’ve screwed up academically and professionally over the last 12 years. I mean, I finished college and grad school (at two prestigious universities, no less), but I basically spent much of my time goofing off, and in fact almost got expelled from college for low grades at one point. I basically had to be dragged kicking and screaming through grad school. Professionally, I haven’t done much to be proud of and wasn’t really a stellar employee at my last job. I would say that I’m pretty smart and capable, I do have a pretty solid skill-set, and I have plenty of experience. But my career is definitely not where I want it to be right now. My brother, who’s 7 years younger than me and finished both college and grad school (at more prestigious universities than the ones I went to) within 5 years, is definitely waaaaay ahead of where I’ve ever been, both academically and professionally.
Without going into too much detail, this job has really triggered in me a deep sense of shame over my academic and professional shortcomings. I definitely plan to do my best at it, and I have no reason to believe I won’t. But I’m thinking that, in order to make up for the last 12 years of fuckups, I need to deprive myself of a few things. I think of it as well-deserved self-punishment for letting myself fall this far. My plan is to focus on this job, and nothing else.
However, I’ve also been thinking a lot about how, well…I seem to be forgettable to a lot of people socially. There’s a lot to unpack here - too much for this post. But it seems like most of my friendships are pretty one-sided, and I seem to be the one “driving” them. If I’m not actively interacting with someone - whether it’s in person, online, over text, etc. - then it seems like that person just…forgets I exist. Don’t get me wrong, I’m able to do reasonably well in social situations. But the “friendships” I form in those settings tend to be pretty one-sided. It’s almost like I’m sort of sideshow attraction at these events. Even if/when I initiate contact with a friend, it seems like I’m the one always driving the conversation. Friends rarely, if ever, initiate contact out of the blue with me. I don’t blame them. I blame myself. I rationalize this by telling myself I don't deserve meaningful friendships, much less romantic relationships.
So there’s this one meetup (I’d rather not go into specifics, for anonymity’s sake) I go to every week with a couple of friends. I’ve been going to it for about 3 years now and I always enjoy myself at those meetups. I think I’ve made some pretty good, close friends through it. But I’ve decided to basically cut off contact with them for a few weeks. I’ve stopped going to the meet ups and I’ve stopped texting them. Part of it is out of this desire to punish myself for my academic and professional failures. Part of it is out of shame. Part of it is out of anger - not at them, but at myself. Part of it is because I genuinely want to see if they’ll notice or care.
Lo and behold, I actually did get a text from one of those friends a few days ago checking up on me. And this is one with whom I’ve actually had some pretty close and heavy conversations. And now it’s triggered some real confusion in me. Part of me wants to continue this no-contact out of self-punishment and shame over my professional and academic shortcomings. Part of me wants to go back to the meetups and talk about what’s bothering me with that friend. Part of me feels like I don’t deserve to be able to talk about my shortcomings and shame with anyone. Part of me thinks that this friend only texted me to be polite and doesn't really care. And part of me feels so ashamed that I’d even run an experiment like this that I feel like I don’t deserve these friends or these meetups.
I’m running a similar experiment, by the way, with my therapist, who I’ve been seeing her every week for a few years. I’ve been doing it because (1) I feel like I don’t deserve the relief therapy gives me because I’ve hosed up so much academically and professionally and (2) to see if she’ll notice or care. I did get a text from her a few weeks ago basically asking me if I’m okay, telling me that she has an obligation to make sure I’m okay. I replied that I was fine, but that was it.
So I don’t know what to do. Should I just give up on the no-contact thing? Should I see how long I can take it? Has anyone been in a similar situation? What would you do if you were in my place? I'm feeling pretty torn up for a number of different reasons right now.
tl;dr: My new job has triggered a deep sense of shame over my academic and professional shortcomings. I also feel frustrated over my inability to form "balanced" friendships and social connections, and I see that as yet another personal shortcoming. I'm trying to no-contact some friends who I see at a regular meetup to see if they notice or care that I'm gone. One of them reached out to me a week ago to check on me. Now I feel confused and torn as to what to do. My head is a whirlwind of shame, loneliness, and self-hatred.

But I only want to order a Big Mac

# ? May 10, 2017 04:56

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

quote:

I know this was a long time ago but still....

8 years ago I remember I was at a big social get together in town. Later on we walked back from town to a friends house and I think I said something to this girl roughly along the lines of "that pizza your eating looks good" and she said "sorry I don't really know who you are" and obviously she didn't speak to me after that.

Do you think that reaction of hers was uncalled for or not?

Admittedly (especially back then) I was an attention seeker, really aggressive and I was a bit scruffy/weird looking too i guess.

# ? May 10, 2017 04:57

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Agentdark posted:

Do you have a fuzzy, lovable dog with a dumb little doggy grin. Because if you don't, you should.

No and I can't even send VanSandman a gift for the puppy pics because I don't have his gd address!!!!!

# ? May 10, 2017 04:59

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

fruit on the bottom posted:

Realtalk: everybody here deserves a healthy relationship with a person that loves and cherishes them and can do better than a person who treats them terribly no matter how badly they post on these forums.

Considering how badly my dad treats everyone (though I guess not really meaning to) I have no idea why I got obsessed with someone who did all those things but worse. More than anything, my dad is critical of every single thing, and is always trying to put other people in the family down. So consigning myself to a lifetime of that doesn't seem so good? Familiar though. Humans are wired badly.

# ? May 10, 2017 05:05

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO: Feb 28, 1985

Maybe it's as simple as you want someone with familiar traits to treat you well for a change.

# ? May 10, 2017 05:07

Blue Train: Jun 17, 2012

You wouldn't want to be wrong tho would you

# ? May 10, 2017 05:07

christmas boots: Oct 15, 2012; To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out; Biscuit Hider

Pick posted:

Considering how badly my dad treats everyone (though I guess not really meaning to) I have no idea why I got obsessed with someone who did all those things but worse. More than anything, my dad is critical of every single thing, and is always trying to put other people in the family down. So consigning myself to a lifetime of that doesn't seem so good? Familiar though. Humans are wired badly.

Hopefully you recognize that you deserve better than that?

# ? May 10, 2017 05:14

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO posted:

Maybe it's as simple as you want someone with familiar traits to treat you well for a change.

Actually one of the "I think everyone but me is an NPC" conversations I had was with my dad.

# ? May 10, 2017 05:37

blarzgh: Apr 14, 2009; SNITCHIN' RANDY; Grimey Drawer

Hot Dog Day #91 posted:

I read this thread to make me feel better about my life and in the last 5 pages I've read about an 18 year old drug addict with a yeast infection, revenge masturbation, and Pick texting Hugh.

Feeling preeetty good atm.

You know, you and Hugh have something in common.

# ? May 10, 2017 05:41

Hot Dog Day #91: Jun 19, 2003

blarzgh posted:

You know, you and Hugh have something in common.

Hmm, I don't get the burn blarzgh.

# ? May 10, 2017 05:46

blarzgh: Apr 14, 2009; SNITCHIN' RANDY; Grimey Drawer

Hot Dog Day #91 posted:

Hmm, I don't get the burn blarzgh.

Neither of you can walk.

# ? May 10, 2017 05:46

blarzgh: Apr 14, 2009; SNITCHIN' RANDY; Grimey Drawer

That joke was primarily for my own entertainment, and it was wildly successful.

# ? May 10, 2017 05:48

Hot Dog Day #91: Jun 19, 2003

gently caress you and your ability to use my posts in one thread to burn me in another.

I'm on crutches, not hiding under a Chevy anyway.

# ? May 10, 2017 06:05

NomChompsky: Sep 17, 2008

Pick posted:

haha i'm lookin at this and it's too real

Ogre the limit, under arrest.

# ? May 10, 2017 06:08

Axolotl: Jan 23, 2002; Whatever

Pick posted:

haha i'm lookin at this and it's too real

Loss edits getting even more abstract

# ? May 10, 2017 06:10

NomChompsky: Sep 17, 2008

Pick posted:

Considering how badly my dad treats everyone (though I guess not really meaning to) I have no idea why I got obsessed with someone who did all those things but worse. More than anything, my dad is critical of every single thing, and is always trying to put other people in the family down. So consigning myself to a lifetime of that doesn't seem so good? Familiar though. Humans are wired badly.

How can you not understand why this happens? Haven't you listened to every single episode of Loveline? Dr. Drew and Adam Carolla would've had you pegged 15 seconds into the call.

# ? May 10, 2017 06:14

blarzgh: Apr 14, 2009; SNITCHIN' RANDY; Grimey Drawer

Hot Dog Day #91 posted:

gently caress you and your ability to use my posts in one thread to burn me in another.

I'm on crutches, not hiding under a Chevy anyway.

Well, only one of us has to work tomorrow, so you win this round.

# ? May 10, 2017 06:15

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

NomChompsky posted:

How can you not understand why this happens? Haven't you listened to every single episode of Loveline? Dr. Drew and Adam Carolla would've had you pegged 15 seconds into the call.

There's a comfort in seeing and knowing exactly what demented thing you are doing versus the fear you feel when you surrender yourself to a new path which may be more or less demented.

# ? May 10, 2017 06:15

NomChompsky: Sep 17, 2008

Our parents teach us how love works, or how it's "supposed" to work. Essentially, they give us the "roadmap" to love. If they suck at that, and do a bad job, then we have a lovely map, and constantly go the wrong direction. Habitually. Because we want love. But we don't know how to find it correctly because our parents were just real, real bad at it. The key is to train yourself to seek out different kinds of love. The tradeoff is that it always seems just a little bit boring and not as genuine. But that's because we're hosed up, and not because love sucks.

Also, nobody is special. We are all a story that has played out ten thousand thousand times. And it's always gonna end the same way (in the dirt, motherfucker. The goddamn dirty dirt).

# ? May 10, 2017 06:17

NomChompsky: Sep 17, 2008

Also, as a person who is basically living that last sentence you posted as my entire life right now, Pick, that comfort is the thing that paralyzes you from doing the thing that'll make you get better at stuff. But I'm sure as poo poo not gonna tell you to break the mold, because I ain't! Hell yeah. :cheers:

# ? May 10, 2017 06:21

Panfilo: Aug 27, 2011; Can't post for 6 days!

Every time I read this thread I turn the monitor off after a page or two and go hug my wife. It makes me really appreciate what I have in my existence.

# ? May 10, 2017 06:25

NomChompsky: Sep 17, 2008

Can I have a hug too?

# ? May 10, 2017 06:27

Streak: May 16, 2004; by Nyc_Tattoo

dudeness posted:

Me [late-20s M] with my MESSY Brother [mid-20s M] and his GF [mid-20s F] Am I a horrible Person? Non-Romantic

Is there a word for someone that makes a legitimate complain but they do it in such a way that you suddenly don't give a poo poo?

If only his post was more empty like a Washitsu

It's called being Pick

# ? May 10, 2017 06:39

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

I was in my 20s when I first spent a holiday with a family that didn't all openly despise each other, I don't remember the year I just remember freaking out cause I was pretty sure I'd been lured into The Stepford Wives

Me [46M] with my Girlfriend [42F] of several months, Eskimo Kisses/Nuzzling

quote:

After dating for about 5 months, my girlfriend just this weekend said she hates that sometimes when I kiss her I rub noses. She says it is disgusting and that no one else she has ever talked to has done it.

She has asked me to stop (fine) but now points it out if our noses touch when we kiss. "You were going to do the nose thing, weren't you!?" It has really taken the fun out of any intimacy. Have I really been kissing people differently than everyone one else decades?

# ? May 10, 2017 06:41

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO: Feb 28, 1985

Pick posted:

There's a comfort in seeing and knowing exactly what demented thing you are doing versus the fear you feel when you surrender yourself to a new path which may be more or less demented.

You may very well have a very clear handle on what the negative traits of your father are, and be making a very efficient beeline for them in this rear end in a top hat. You're absolutely right to not want that to continue even if it's safe. It's self destructive. Why be awesome and do that.

It ends up with devaluing yourself by asking questions like "what could I have done differently" or "I'll give them one more chance". He sucks.

Bugger that.

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO fucked around with this message at 06:54 on May 10, 2017

# ? May 10, 2017 06:44

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Panfilo posted:

Every time I read this thread I turn the monitor off after a page or two and go hug my wife. It makes me really appreciate what I have in my existence.

a monitor that overheats every 5-10 minutes?!

# ? May 10, 2017 06:50

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Nose guy rubbing her like a floor buffer, trying to polish her schnozz to a mirror shine, incredulous when she demands he stop putting wood polish on it.

# ? May 10, 2017 06:50

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# ? Jun 6, 2024 10:13

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Barudak posted:

Nose guy rubbing her like a floor buffer, trying to polish her schnozz to a mirror shine, incredulous when she demands he stop putting wood polish on it.

hes trying to feel if she is lying like pinocchio

# ? May 10, 2017 06:52

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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