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Joe Rogan thinks nootropics work because he is high as heck
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Feb 2, 2022 05:47
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Wizard Master posted:I've been laughing pretty hard at some of the soymales in this thread who have clearly never listened to a single minute of JRE and are just parroting what their favourite podcasters/social media personalities are saying about him. Best one yet. It really makes you believe that op is a massively insecure, apefied hambeast who would slurp on Joe Rogan's hgh-seeping taint in a hot second! Bravo, my friend!! These kind of writing chops don't come around often, you are destined for greatness and don't let anyone tell you different!
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Feb 2, 2022 06:11
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Joe Rogan cries himself to sleep every night because I called him Toe Togan when I stuffed him into his locker.
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Feb 2, 2022 06:13
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Joe Rogan died on the operating table and came back from the Otherside with the powers of severely diminished mental capacity.
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Feb 2, 2022 06:22
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DUKE CANNON THINKS YOU ARE ALL JEALOUS OF JOE ROGAN!
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Feb 2, 2022 06:31
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Play posted:Best one yet. It really makes you believe that op is a massively insecure, apefied hambeast who would slurp on Joe Rogan's hgh-seeping taint in a hot second! Well yes, but only because I am bloated from all the soy I consume and haven't felt the touch of another person since the war.(no, it was a different war than the one you're thinking of) Joe Rogan believes he is the ultimate conservationalist as he only needs one roll of paper towels to wipe. Joe Rogan once did an interview with Jim Fowler of Wild Nature, who introduced Joe to a juvenile spider monkey named "Jango." The segment couldn't be aired as Joe began addressing the monkey directly and assumed a position that Fowler described as a "submissive presenting." Joe Rogan has stated that the people he would most like to interview are the McDonald's Fry Kids. In an interview with Maxim Magazine in 2001, Rogan stated that he was a capitalist after reading Das Kapital. In actuality, it was a pamphlet from his bank about "My First Savings Account", which one of his roadies called Marxist because someone received money for doing nothing. Joe Rogan doesn't believe in outer space, but believes we landed on the moon because "it's just right there man." Joe Rogan has his nipples insured with Lloyd's of London for $650,000.00 together. Oddly, the left one is insured for $400,000.00, and the right for $250,000.00. As a youth, Joe Rogan enjoyed performative ice dancing until a tragic head injury left him unable to turn more than 90° at a time without becoming disoriented and speaking in a poor imitation of an Australian accent. At an auction in 2018, Joe Rogan purchased a jersey worn by Mickey Mantle in a 1964 game for a seven-figure sum. He proudly displays this in his office and has every "Mickey" he meets sign it. Sadly, he is extremely racist and assumes that every individual of Irish descent constitutes a "Mickey." In order to avoid any appearance of impropriety, Joe Rogan denies ever having met a woman, any woman, at all. Joe Rogan held the Guiness World Record from 2008-2009 for the longest perinium (taint) ever measured at 36.9 cm. Joe Rogan's shoes are specially made by skilled Italian cobblers to accommodate his unusual foot shape. All the shoes he is expected to need for the year are delivered on a single day and presented to Joe by children dressed as elves so as to not "spoil the magic." This day always falls in September based on a complicated formula accounting for tidal equinoxes, the phase of the moon, and the weight and density of Joe's morning bowel movements. It remains he and Jaime's favorite day of the year.
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Feb 2, 2022 06:50
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Joe Rogan lists his gender as "binary"
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Feb 2, 2022 06:59
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Joe Rogan will never give up
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Feb 2, 2022 07:47
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Joe Rogaine cause he has no hair!!!!! Lolololol
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Feb 2, 2022 08:02
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Joe Rogan would never use a hard 'R' around "one of the good ones".
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Feb 2, 2022 08:07
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Joe Rogan is the master of the sphincter
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Feb 2, 2022 08:08
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as a kid joe rogan's favorite halloween candy was bit o honey not because it tastes good (they do) but because he wanted to strengthen his jawline
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Feb 2, 2022 08:13
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The Joe in Joe Rogan is not short for Joseph. It is infact short for Jolene. And Dolly Parton once sang a song about him. "9 to 5" is a jaunty tune about how many feet tall Mr. Rogan was when he was younger, and to what height he has subsequently shrunk.
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Feb 2, 2022 10:34
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Joe Rogan poops out his peehole and pees out his butthole
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Feb 2, 2022 11:02
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after playing 10 seconds of parappa the rapper, joe rogan spent 15 years telling people "kick, punch, chop.... it's all in the mind, dude"
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Feb 2, 2022 12:57
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Joe Rogan roars when he wipes.
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Feb 2, 2022 14:48
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The main character in the children's book Where the Wild Things Are is actually adult Joe Rogan.
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Feb 2, 2022 17:42
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Joe Rogan got high on Benadryl and in his deliriant visions he was naked and surrounded by average sized women who towered over him and laughed down at his small stature and tiny dick. He now thinks the whole thing was a near death experience where he got a glimpse of Hell itself and now refuses to sleep in any room that doesn't have dozens of religious symbols from all faiths plastered on the walls.
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Feb 2, 2022 18:20
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Jorogon keeps a dozen teenage boys chained in a bunker to harvest their testosterone, and other more niche male hormones, through a surprisingly technical medical set up.
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Feb 3, 2022 06:13
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Weka posted:Jorogon keeps a dozen teenage boys chained in a bunker to harvest their testosterone, and other more niche male hormones, through a surprisingly technical medical set up. This came about due to one of his sponsors touting "totally organic and supercharged adrenoantofem" as a supplement to "Alphaize [sic] your core muscle groups and synergize your masculine authority". A German ex-pat Latin American osteopath set up the system such that Joe could "adopt" disaffected youth from central and south American nations in order to harvest "youth ions" from "homeopathic distillates" of their blood which the "doctor" ensured would prolong his life and "ensure the ascendancy of Emialku" before his dying breath. Sadly Joe's private physician passed prior to an entirely unrelated Israeli extradition hearing.
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Feb 3, 2022 07:03
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Joe Roan believes corn nuts are maize testicles.
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Feb 3, 2022 11:04
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Play posted:Best one yet. It really makes you believe that op is a massively insecure, apefied hambeast who would slurp on Joe Rogan's hgh-seeping taint in a hot second! I've been laughing pretty hard, grinding my teeth in pure hilarity.
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Feb 3, 2022 13:49
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In Joe Rogan's nightmares, he's a tiny marmoset filled with terror jumping and swinging through the jungle while the mad howls of enraged chimpanzees follow close behind him.
Smugworth fucked around with this message at 17:24 on Feb 3, 2022 |
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Feb 3, 2022 13:56
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I actually love soy on account of my huge tits.
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Feb 3, 2022 16:16
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In Episode 131 Joe Rogan showed a kanji tattoo he got on his inner left thigh, saying it meant 'tough, strong'. Actually translation was 'confused dog man'.
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Feb 3, 2022 16:31
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joe rogan was once made to feel inferior while visiting a high school friend who went on to become a renowned scientist. to reassert dominance, joe rogan swallowed his friend's pet goldfish whole
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Feb 3, 2022 17:09
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Joe Rogan constantly shits himself, not because of the drugs or anything but because he's just so dang angry at the world in general that he's just constantly rage making GBS threads.
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Feb 3, 2022 18:44
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Joe Rogan was cast in the role of Madmartigan in the 1988 hit film "Willow", but due to contractual obligations with NEMA (Northeastern Midget Association) he was only allowed to display his horse sport talents with permission of the USDF. The contract expired in August of 2012. Since then he has gained many accolades with the AMHA (American Minatare Horse Association) and has quite the following in the world of horse sport.
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Feb 3, 2022 18:51
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Joe Rogan thinks Tenacious D's Tribute song is the actual song they play to the Devil.
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Feb 3, 2022 18:54
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joe rogan hires jamie to use the internet for him, but only because he refuses to hit any button that says submit
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Feb 3, 2022 18:59
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Dang It Bhabhi! posted:I actually love soy on account of my huge tits. 
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Feb 3, 2022 19:41
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Joe Rogan gains 1 new viewer every time his name is mentioned somewhere. Joe Rogan has single-handedly caused a massive legacy media meltdown because words. Joe Rogan made you cry.
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Feb 3, 2022 20:09
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Joe Rogan? More like BORE-ophyll!
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Feb 3, 2022 21:43
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Never forget when Joe's buddy Alex Jones pitched some sort of supplement by sharing Before & After photos that were literally a "can u spot the difference??" puzzle
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Feb 3, 2022 23:42
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I know this one! The difference is he’s sucking in his gut even harder in the “after” photo
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Feb 3, 2022 23:44
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This is what Joe Rogan thinks an "alpha male in peak condition" is, but Joe Rogan may be biased by his deep subconscious lust for his fellow conspirashitter.
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Feb 4, 2022 00:12
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Cream-of-Plenty posted:Never forget when Joe's buddy Alex Jones pitched some sort of supplement by sharing Before & After photos that were literally a "can u spot the difference??" puzzle 45 days later and my tits are a little more saggy, I changed my pants and my watch, and I'm having a hot flash. Hot flash=burning calories by doing nothing!
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Feb 4, 2022 00:25
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Joe Rogan and Alex Jones both ate Kent State Gun Girl’s rear end but what a lot of people don’t know is that they ate it simultaneously.
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Feb 4, 2022 00:36
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Eating the rear end of someone famous for making GBS threads themselves is just asking for trouble.
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Feb 4, 2022 00:42
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Funky See Funky Do posted:Eating the rear end of someone famous for making GBS threads themselves is just asking for trouble. Yes but a person doesn't have a lot of options when they're a rightwing psychopath who can only get it on with like minded people.
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Feb 4, 2022 00:50
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