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Funny enough, I just read this article the other day talking about how a lot of kids with ADHD show similar traits to kids on the autism spectrum, but they don't fit enough of the criteria. Seems like there's a lot of overlap between the two!
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Apr 20, 2014 03:26
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WolfensteinBag posted:Funny enough, I just read this article the other day talking about how a lot of kids with ADHD show similar traits to kids on the autism spectrum, but they don't fit enough of the criteria. Seems like there's a lot of overlap between the two! THat always bothered me, because I'm obviously not autistic but at the same time I have always had terrible problems socialising, have trouble maintaining friendships, have anxiety, mood swings and depressions, and a strange language problem that makes it difficult for me to speak coherently in my native tongue sometimes(terrible word recall and just general difficulty explaining concepts). EDIT: My family always complained about me being unresponsive and avoiding eye contact as well when I was little. A lot.
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Apr 20, 2014 04:03
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Yeah, same here! I think your mind being so busy makes you focus on learning different things, and that you just grow up experiencing the world differently. Two very different causes that show the same symptoms. Like a headache being caused by stress vs head congestion, that sort of thing. I would think it would cause some people on both sides to end up misdiagnosed. Oh, another thing regarding social situations for me is they're just exhausting trying to keep up, so as I've gotten older, I'd just rather be a hermit and give up on meeting new people. It's not like I CAN'T do it, I'm just sick of it. I know enough people, I'm good, haha. All I socialize with these days is family (and, honestly, only certain sides of my extended family. I married into a better family than I grew up with!) WolfensteinBag fucked around with this message at 04:35 on Apr 20, 2014 |
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Apr 20, 2014 04:31
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Anyone have ideas on how to cope with a kid who won't eat or sleep? I have an eight year old boy who is right now (after a mostly med free spring break) rolling around giggling at 10:30 pm. At his last doctor visit he had once again failed to gain any weight which is making his doc talk about yanking his meds altogether. He takes 5mg methylphenidate and 40mg Vyvanse, which has helped him function in school well enough to finally break grade level reading (his writing is still poo poo and all his composition assignments look like XKCD/Minecraft illuminated manuscripts - heavily populated by stick figures with pickaxes hacking away at all the crooked, out of order, and bass ackwards letters) which made this post:Your Dead Gay Son posted:2 and a half weeks on vyvanse and all the wonderful things about it are completely gone. Not even a honeymoon per se, but I'm just starting to acknowledge/notice the side effects that make it unacceptable for me. I never felt high or euphoric, just normal and calm. kinda scare the crap out of me. The boy sometimes complains his meds make him feel weird (he used to be on 10mg methylphenidate) but he can't articulate what weird means, really. At the doc's he is always in the late afternoon "human pinball" mode where he can barely maintain anything like a coherent conversation. No wonder people with ADHD have difficulties socially. Yeah, he avoids eye contact a lot, but we think that is largely because when he was very small (and not yet diagnosed) we used to force him to maintain eye contact to try and keep him engaged with us in a conversation. Usually these were like the important but not fun conversations like, "We are upset that you ran into the street. Again. You can't run in the street because you suddenly need to be on the other side. No, you are still not faster than the cars. You will never be faster than the cars. Stop arguing with us that you can practice running to get faster than the cars." Sorry. Kind of ranting and unloading and rambling there. On the generic note, sometimes out pharmacy gives us white methylphenidate and sometimes yellow. Do any of you have experience or know if there is a difference between the two generics?
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Apr 21, 2014 06:46
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I had terrible and crooked writing when I was little. I don't know if it relates, but I was never medicated when I was a kid. Maybe ask him if the weirdness he feels is like... Being kinda dizzy or "out if it," that's the best way I can articulate it. Like, if I look back and forth between two objects, it takes a little longer to focus on it. Like a strange vertigo or lightheadedness. I don't know if understanding that might help, but maybe. I can't think of things to help. Especially a kid. I know some nice tea and something relaxing like a chill movie or book can help, but it's harder to reason with a kid like that. Good luck. Also, sorry if my post was frightening. It definitely isn't something that's really scary, just concerning for me. Plus, I was really down when I typed that up. I haven't found a lot of other posts or accounts about the weird vision stuff, so it seems pretty rare. ziasquinn fucked around with this message at 07:20 on Apr 21, 2014 |
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Apr 21, 2014 07:16
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BarbarousBertha posted:Anyone have ideas on how to cope with a kid who won't eat or sleep? I have an eight year old boy who is right now (after a mostly med free spring break) rolling around giggling at 10:30 pm. Ugh, I feel bad because I honestly have no idea about suggestions, but this was both me as a kid, and now my (almost) 3 year old is the same way. I remember never wanting to go to bed, and my sister and I taking turns trying to sneak downstairs until our parents caught us and yelled at us to go back to bed. Even as I got older, I didn't try to sneak and stay up anymore, but I could NOT fall asleep. I remember feeling like my whole body was full of energy, so I used to take deep breaths and imagine this white light leaving my body with every exhale while I "got darker" if that makes any sense. Really funny, because a bit after that (in Jr. High) I started learning about meditation, and realized that I was already sort of doing that already! I guess maybe that's something that might help? Teaching him breathing and visualization techniques to help calm down. That and a solid, calming nighttime routine. I'm totally being hypocritical with this, btw. My own son has a hard time falling asleep at night, and we've been terrible about getting a good routine down, and it never fails that SOMETHING comes up to get him riled up right before bed. If I ever figure out a good trick, I'll be sure to let you know... Oh this all reminds me... Do you think it's possible to tell a kid has ADHD when he's not even 3 yet? It's really hard to say what could be just growing up and what could be ADHD related with him. He's a wild kid, and although we try to give him structure, and HE tries to be good and listen, he has a really hard time with it and forgets that he should be sitting, or can't run or jump in a certain place, etc. He also has a hard time switching his focus from one thing to another, like I do. You have to make sure to get his attention first, and make sure he's paying attention before you ask him questions or give him instructions. We also both have a really hard time in places that are a bit chaotic and over-stimulating. At the very least, I can always judge by how *I* feel to see how I might be able to help him. But it's really rough when he's around people that just don't understand how he could possibly be flipping out over "nothing" when they haven't been in a situation like that. You try to tell a person to back off and give us some space, and that he needs to clear his head, but they CONSTANTLY come back trying to do or say things to "cheer him up". He doesn't need cheering up! He needs to be left alone! The most concerning thing with him is speaking. He's going to be 3 in July, and he just does NOT show any interest in talking.  He understands really well, and he USED to say a few things, but now a days he only says "I do" for yes, or Mama or Daddy, for the most part. MAYBE once in awhile you can get something else out of him, but it's almost like he doesn't see the point in trying when he has a hard time forming words.We were thinking of making him a doctor's appointment soon to talk about it, but I thought I'd ask all of your opinions on it while I'm here. quote:his writing is still poo poo and all his composition assignments look like XKCD/Minecraft illuminated manuscripts - heavily populated by stick figures with pickaxes hacking away at all the crooked, out of order, and bass ackwards letters This was also me as a kid! My 3rd grade teacher really hit the nail on the head with it, I think. She told my mom that it was like my brain was moving faster than my hands could keep up with (how I never got diagnosed as ADHD as a kid, I'll never know! There's tons of signs like this looking back.) One thing she had me do was to do my assignment, then take my time and rewrite it again. It definitely helps with legibility for the teacher, but it really stressed me out in school. I was always one of the first kids to finish an assignment, but with the rewriting, I was never even done when time was up. So it might work better for homework than in class, but it's at least something. Also good to know it isn't necessarily a side effect of the medication. To this day I have a hard time writing legibly. The computer is my best friend. Again, it's not that I CAN'T write, it's that I write too fast. If I take my time it's fine, but I usually don't. My notes from school are hilarious, at the time I could decipher them because I had just written them, but now they look like they're in code. I also had drawings all up and down my margins. I honestly think doodling helped me keep focus some how, it seems like the more doodles I had, the more I knew the subject material. So weird.
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Apr 21, 2014 20:35
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My penmanship is still nigh illegible. But also, just like my Uncle Bob's. So, it runs in the family! As for the non sleeping, barely verbal. 3 year old, yes - definitely take him to the doctor. Even if he doesn't have ADHD or another organic issue, he may still qualify for Early Intervention services, based on the non talking and/or other issues. (If it helps, I talked a lot, but was basically incomprehensible as a child. I had many years of Speech Therapy through school, and that helped tremendously.)
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Apr 21, 2014 21:13
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Tin Hat posted:
It's nice to hear that it is helpful. I think we can all rest easy and blame the industrial revolution for the differentiation between ADHD types and the ability to fit into modern society easily. Video games suck. Once you get over the vilification of one your favorite pastimes, they end up like the looking glass in the Harry Potter books and you see what you want to see. Wake up ten years later and have accomplished nothing. Does anyone care that I participated in the world first Vaelastrasz kill and the U.S. first C'Thun kill? I tried everything to justify them because they really do engage your (adhd suffering) frontal lobe naturally. I tried meditating, I tried grabbing complex issues, I tried planning my day and really I got nothing done. Sure I've made some online 'friends'. I had some fun but mostly I killed time. I restrict my gaming now to just things on my ipad, because I only want to kill time is when I'm getting paid for it anyway. As far as the quote, I asked my therapist if I could have ADHD and she said- You certainly have the symptoms, whether you respond to the meds is really the determining factor and then she referred me to her in practice child ADHD specialist. The good news is, if you respond- great we write a script and treat you with cognitive behavior therapy. The other good news is, if you don't respond- we treat you with cognitive behavior therapy and you don't have to pay for the script!
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Apr 21, 2014 22:28
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In less than 3 hours I have a meeting with my group to discuss progress on a big loving paper that I have written about an hour for. I fully expect to be up til 4 doing this paper.  for real right nowWHY CAN I NOT FOCUS ON THIS loving PAPER
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Apr 21, 2014 22:46
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My writing is actually kind of nice? I worked really hard as a kid to write cursive nicely, it's been a point of pride for me. I've even tried to get into calligraphy to get better at it and steady my hands since they shake slightly. I'm actually going in for thyroid testing this week since some of my symptoms have gotten so bad I don't feel like leaving my apartment anymore...like sweating so bad I can't walk outside without dripping with sweat.BarbarousBertha posted:Anyone have ideas on how to cope with a kid who won't eat or sleep? I have an eight year old boy who is right now (after a mostly med free spring break) rolling around giggling at 10:30 pm. At his last doctor visit he had once again failed to gain any weight which is making his doc talk about yanking his meds altogether. He takes 5mg methylphenidate and 40mg Vyvanse, which has helped him function in school well enough to finally break grade level reading (his writing is still poo poo and all his composition assignments look like XKCD/Minecraft illuminated manuscripts - heavily populated by stick figures with pickaxes hacking away at all the crooked, out of order, and bass ackwards letters) which made this post: You gotta tire him out somehow. He should be dead tired by 10:30pm and unfortunately if he isn't you gotta take him to the gym. Get him involved in super physical activities if you can afford them, like rock climbing or martial arts. He might also need to take his meds earlier or with something to help him come down off it earlier. Sorry, I only really have experience with Adderall xr which I can easily sleep on after I've taken it if I'm already tired.
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Apr 21, 2014 23:59
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Horrible Smutbeast posted:My writing is actually kind of nice? I worked really hard as a kid to write cursive nicely, it's been a point of pride for me. I've even tried to get into calligraphy to get better at it and steady my hands since they shake slightly. I'm actually going in for thyroid testing this week since some of my symptoms have gotten so bad I don't feel like leaving my apartment anymore...like sweating so bad I can't walk outside without dripping with sweat. I'm surprised to hear someone else say this in this thread! I also have problems with symptoms like overheating and hands shaking, since I was a teenager in fact. It's been hard to adapt since the heat often makes me feel sick at work/school, so I dress really lightly and often keep a thermos of ice water. However my thyroid hormones (TSH, Free T3 and T4) are totally normal. I've read on the internet that antibody tests are required to rule out Graves' disease but I doubt my problem is because of my thyroid at this point (especially since Graves' is often associated with eye problems). Anyway you shouldn't let this discourage you from getting those tests done, especially because hyperthyroidism can cause symptoms of ADHD and should be ruled out early.
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Apr 22, 2014 00:18
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Tin Hat posted:I'm surprised to hear someone else say this in this thread! I also have problems with symptoms like overheating and hands shaking, since I was a teenager in fact. It's been hard to adapt since the heat often makes me feel sick at work/school, so I dress really lightly and often keep a thermos of ice water. However my thyroid hormones (TSH, Free T3 and T4) are totally normal. I've read on the internet that antibody tests are required to rule out Graves' disease but I doubt my problem is because of my thyroid at this point (especially since Graves' is often associated with eye problems). Anyway you shouldn't let this discourage you from getting those tests done, especially because hyperthyroidism can cause symptoms of ADHD and should be ruled out early. Yeah, my doctor told me that the hormone levels may look alright but there can still be something wrong with the thyroid physically that's making other symptoms appear? Mostly the sweating, inability to lose or gain weight, the shaky hands and everyone's favourite the high heart rate but normal blood pressure. I'm pretty scared that these things are just "normal" for my body which means I have nothing I can do. I just have to live the rest of my life wearing a tank top under my winter coat in a blizzard because I sweat so badly I'd otherwise soak through 3-4 layers of clothes (including a sweater) otherwise. Or having to go to appointments or work an hour early and changing in the washroom so I don't have sweat dripping off my glasses when I get there. So he has the full blood tests lined up (hormones, testing for mono, other infections or conditions) as well as an ultrasound and a throat swab. Thank god I live in Canada. It'd also mean if I can get my thyroid treated I might be able to lower my adderall dosage which is always a good thing.
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Apr 22, 2014 01:29
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Hmm, your doc seems more concerned than mine is. Even though I'm also Canadian I pretty much have to beg him to do the tests I want. I hadn't read about the ultrasound or throat swab before. At some point I should probably find a new doctor but the search for a shrink combined with the ordinary everyday pressures I have has left me exhausted for now. The sweating is pretty bad for me too but more than anything my constant levels of fatigue are making it impossible to do stuff. I'm hoping at least that will improve if I get my anxiety/ADHD under better control. I get where you're coming from though, it's a really frustrating and hopeless set of symptoms sometimes.
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Apr 22, 2014 01:49
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Strange, I'm inbetween finding a new doctor but I just went to a walk in clinic. The doctor there treated me for strep a few weeks ago and was completely happy to help schedule me these appointments, and I had to actually turn down getting the camera down the throat test (which he wants to do if my results come back negative for the thyroid issues). He's been a real help so I probably will ask him to be my primary care doctor until I move next year. Also, don't feel so bad about the shrink. It took me like 2 years to find a psych, and then he dropped me immediately after giving me the diagnoses. I haven't had any other help for the ADHD except what my doctors prescribe me everytime I go in for a refill. At least it's free!
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Apr 22, 2014 03:47
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quote:I honestly think doodling helped me keep focus some how, it seems like the more doodles I had, the more I knew the subject material. So weird. This is likely from having something to maintain focus while learning rather than just zoning out and hoping you remember stuff. I always do better when I'm writing notes down while listening. If I'm not on medication my retention is still better with this but not great. On medication I can take important info only for notes and remember the whole class. It's so nice to be able to leave class thinking "I'm actually learning this rather than hoping the test questions trigger memories of hearing that material."
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Apr 22, 2014 04:25
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WolfensteinBag posted:Oh this all reminds me... Do you think it's possible to tell a kid has ADHD when he's not even 3 yet? It's really hard to say what could be just growing up and what could be ADHD related with him. He's a wild kid, and although we try to give him structure, and HE tries to be good and listen, he has a really hard time with it and forgets that he should be sitting, or can't run or jump in a certain place, etc. He also has a hard time switching his focus from one thing to another, like I do. You have to make sure to get his attention first, and make sure he's paying attention before you ask him questions or give him instructions. We also both have a really hard time in places that are a bit chaotic and over-stimulating. At the very least, I can always judge by how *I* feel to see how I might be able to help him. But it's really rough when he's around people that just don't understand how he could possibly be flipping out over "nothing" when they haven't been in a situation like that. You try to tell a person to back off and give us some space, and that he needs to clear his head, but they CONSTANTLY come back trying to do or say things to "cheer him up". He doesn't need cheering up! He needs to be left alone! We heard a lot of, "Well, what do you expect from a 2 year old (3 year old, then 4 year old) boy?" and similarly dismissive (and sexist) stuff. It wasn't until he got kicked out of preschool for failure to nap (something he had not done since about 18 months of age) that people began to take us seriously. The school district were the ones who finally identified him as having "developmental delay" and put him in a Special Education pre-K program half days Monday through Thursday which helped tremendously. The DD designation, by the way, is just generic federal disability lingo for "too young to accurately diagnose" and he kept the designation as well as special education services until he turned six, at which point the school psychologist mixed up his kindergarten year end test results and said his issues were not adversely affecting his education. I was thrilled until I got the actual test scores back a month later, then I was pissed because he no longer had an IEP. What do I expect from a school psychologist responsible for several thousand students who can only spend one day per week at each school, I guess. First grade didn't go very well until they brought in one of the office aides to sit with him and help him stay on task. That was when we took him in to the university's education department and let the doctoral candidates go to town on him. They run a school refusal and anxiety child counseling clinic and were the ones who diagnosed the ADHD. Part of me wishes we had gotten the diagnosis earlier, because in retrospect a lot of things he did which just seemed spiteful and downright evil were simply thoughtless and impulsive. Then again, he was almost 7 when he started taking medication and I would not have wanted to medicate him any younger than that anyway. Too much rapid brain growth is going on at that point to make me feel like brain candy is okie doke, although I have known families who started medicating kids as young as three. Horrible Smutbeast posted:You gotta tire him out somehow. He should be dead tired by 10:30pm and unfortunately if he isn't you gotta take him to the gym. Get him involved in super physical activities if you can afford them, like rock climbing or martial arts. He might also need to take his meds earlier or with something to help him come down off it earlier. Sorry, I only really have experience with Adderall xr which I can easily sleep on after I've taken it if I'm already tired. Thanks for replying, guys. 
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Apr 22, 2014 06:50
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BarbarousBertha posted:You could be describing my son at the same age. He still fixates on minor details he has inflated into major catastrophes when the meds wear off, and it still drives me up a wall when people try to placate or pacify him when he gets like that. It just reminds him of the thing that set him off. Jesus. Redirection is the only thing that really works. I literally threw my hands up and said, "YES!" when I read this, haha. quote:Part of me wishes we had gotten the diagnosis earlier, because in retrospect a lot of things he did which just seemed spiteful and downright evil were simply thoughtless and impulsive. Then again, he was almost 7 when he started taking medication and I would not have wanted to medicate him any younger than that anyway. Personally, I don't think the diagnosis really equates to, "Ok, lets start meds!" I think a diagnosis would just be good for peace of mind, like you're saying. You would know to approach and handle situations differently, which is a huge plus. I think if I would have had more structure with school/homework growing up, I would have done a lot better from Jr. High on up through college (maybe even actually getting a degree!) It also would have been good to know from a social standpoint, because I was definitely a very sensitive, sad little kid. I think the meds, if they work with little side effects, are just an added bonus. BUT, that also could be because I never took meds as a kid, so I just don't know. My husband surprised me and ordered Driven from Distraction for me!  Just showed up at our door yesterday. It looks like a great book, I'm pretty excited! I flipped around with it last night, and it looks like it's interesting enough that I think I'll actually get sucked in once I start it properly. Thanks so much for the recommendation!
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Apr 23, 2014 11:19
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We are having good days and bad with Anna. She's 8 and on Focalin XR 10mg. Her eating is tapering off to barely anything. I'm lucky to get half an orange in her before school, maybe an applesauce and crackers at school and dinner is almost non existent. Then 2 nights later she eats 3 plates of dinner. The following week she stops eating again. I'm picking up carnation instant breakfast today to try and supplement her missed meals. We go in next month for her 6 month check , I'm hoping she hasn't lost. Shes already the smallest in her class and girl scouts. I'm also torn on what to do about breaks from her meds. We took the week of spring break off, she has the crazies scattered, blurting out random stuff, just going non stop for 2 days then level led out, although more scattered then usual. The weekend before school started back up, back on meds and she's like a little zombie, no emotion, just blah. Ah this is rambling, I'm sorry. Just so nice to have people who understand here.
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Apr 23, 2014 12:57
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kiriana posted:We are having good days and bad with Anna. She's 8 and on Focalin XR 10mg. It sounds like she needs to try a different med to be honest. When I had those sideeffects I was either on too high a dose or on the wrong kind of stimulant. She shouldn't be a "zombie", she should be calm and collected. She also needs to be eating way more than that at that age. Do you give her breakfast before her meds while she's still hungry?
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Apr 23, 2014 14:12
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I wondered about changing meds for her. She takes her pill with breakfast.
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Apr 23, 2014 15:37
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My son's on 20mg of methylphenidate (adderal?) and yeah, he has almost no appetite for lunch or breakfast, but if you nag at him to eat he'll take a few bites, realize he's hungry, then dig in like he's starving so he hasn't lost any on the few months he's been on, which is good. But the meds aren't a cure all. You need to combine them with a strict routine and structure, behavioral therapy, and exercise. A lot of exercise. Most ADHD kids are active anyway but you've got to have them in something structured, it helps them focus and it gives you a break. Mine would beg me to chase him in circles around the house between bouts of homework, so he'd finish an assignment, I'd set the stove timer for five minutes, literally chase him all over for five minutes, and have him sit down and do the next assignment. Now he's in gymnastics at the end of the day instead and its motivation to get his homework done and gives me a break while it tires him out so he'll actually sleep afterwards. If you're having trouble providing that structure, you might want to see about getting yourself tested for ADD. If you can't keep to a routine there's no way you're going to be able to enforce it on your kid. If you find yourself making excuses as to how its more important your kid get help than you or whatever, look at it like putting on the oxygen mask on yourself first on the plane. You're no good to anyone if you can't function.
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Apr 23, 2014 16:37
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Any recommendations on planners or daily organizer's? I'm not really into doing something on my phone or something like that. I prefer the tactile response of crossing things off and actually writing things down. I have started to do a little bit of research and saw this one on amazon that was highly rated http://www.amazon.com/Tools4Wisdom-Planner-Calendar-Monthly-Binding/dp/B00IAGCPMC/ref=zg_tr_1069456_1. I have a school planner that works for now but its not big enough. Right now I do stuff just on scratch pieces of paper when I fill up my smaller school planner. I feel like their has to be a kind of all encompassing book that I can carry around or leave at my desk or whatever. Edit: Also from the reading of this thread I did consult a actual doctor and got diagnosed as ADHD and got prescribed (after a little convincing of my doctor) adderall 10mg. I don't know if it's IR or ER yet but I'm guessing IR. I took my first dose today and read a boring article I usually couldn't have stomached to even start. I consider it a wild success so far. Some questions I do have are, what's a good starting point for a mediation routine? What are some good resources for parent's and siblings who are being pretty difficult and don't believe that ADHD is even real. I had sort of a melt down yesterday with a family member. The details aren't terribly important and I forgot to mention to a family member where I parked their car. It's really wasn't a big deal because it was a fairly open parking lot and they ended up finding it after an extra 30 seconds of looking. Either way family member A was extremely vitriolic almost towards me afterwards. Basically years of me "forgetting" came up in a couple of seconds and told me that "their is no excuse for forgetting" and "your a spoiled brat." I don't know if I would call ADHD an excuse but its a "reason" that something happened. I'm working on trying to be better but in the meantime I need my family to be accepting that this is a real thing and I don't want to live like this anymore. I'm going to tell them basically that but would enjoy some actual literature or facts that I could give them to help me back it up. Its hard to convey to people that sometimes you just forget, a thought just leaves your mind. I'm working on being more mindful and being better but it doesn't happen overnight. Edit 2: I do have a copy of Delivered from distraction, I'm about 3/4 of the way through but I don't know if its the best for someone who doesn't have ADD to understand. I don't know I read most of it in one sitting and I don't really remember it, I'm going to have to go back and re read it to get the information out of it again. It's so frustrating that people can't understand when this runs unchecked simple things can seem monumental and you don't feel like you have control at first. Edit 3: Also to sum up how to treat ADD is basically 1. Sleep well 2. Eat well 3. Automate as much as you can 4. Meditate 5. Excercise 6. Use a planner 7. Use a timer 8. Use your time on medication effectively 9. Practice at staying focused and mindful at all times I mean really at the end of the day you still just have to grind through some stuff in life and do stuff that you don't want too. The whole goal of treatment is to put yourself in the best possible position to get through the things that are difficult for you. Its really simple you just have to put in the effort and over time it gets easier. You just get better at exercising the muscle that is focus in situations that you don't want to be focused. Its a huge relief to actually start chipping away at this instead of being paralyzed by inaction. Edit 4: I don't know why I keep remembering all these things I wanted to talk about just now but its all hitting me at once. One thing I notice especially in school is that when I'm in and out of focus is that its like a huge shock. I will be their for 5 minutes and then drift away for 10 and when I come back its like a flash. I regain consciousness (I use the term relatively, its not like I was asleep but I become aware of my surroundings again) and I can feel my heart rate go up and I get a little vertigo. Is that what other people experience when their mind wanders? This is only in somewhat extreme circumstances and its especially in classes I know I need to focus but I am bored to tears. Like in these classes its a constant fight, one part of me knows that I need to focus and is angry. The other side wants to be doing absolutely anything else in the world and it seems like the two sides are just at constant war. I only bring it up because the experience is quite violent. Chocolate fucked around with this message at 23:34 on Apr 24, 2014 |
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Apr 24, 2014 23:04
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Chocolate posted:Any recommendations on planners or daily organizer's? I'm not really into doing something on my phone or something like that. I prefer the tactile response of crossing things off and actually writing things down. I have started to do a little bit of research and saw this one on amazon that was highly rated http://www.amazon.com/Tools4Wisdom-Planner-Calendar-Monthly-Binding/dp/B00IAGCPMC/ref=zg_tr_1069456_1. I have a school planner that works for now but its not big enough. Right now I do stuff just on scratch pieces of paper when I fill up my smaller school planner. I feel like their has to be a kind of all encompassing book that I can carry around or leave at my desk or whatever. I use small blank books that fit in my pocket. You can find them at target near the moleskins in packs of 3. Its smaller than you're looking for, but filling them up and starting a new one feels good like a ritual. Sorry, not what you were asking for.  As far as family members are concerned you start with- I need help to be successful, would you please help me. When they act condescending and say ADHD isn't real, the simple answer is: When did you graduate med school? A doctor diagnosed me. When its in the context of they need to read this to understand how to help you- they will be more open. You're not looking for an excuse for your behavior- you're trying to create a situation where you will be more successful in life. You can't do it alone. You can not do it without the people around you at least understanding and reinforcing the good habits you are trying to create despite the biology in play. If you just explain the summary, they will of course fall back into the familial patterns and frankly its easier to take your frustrations out on someone you've already labelled as lazy or inconsiderate. Its funny how we live up to our labels. You announce one day- 'I'm a people person.' and people accept it and then start putting you in that role (in work or in life). You wake up a few years later and realize you really don't like people, you've just been trying to fit into a label you tried on earlier. Think of the treatment like driving a car. When you first learn you have to pay attention to alot and focus. After a few years, you can drive to work and not realize how you got there (even as a normie) because its all habit.
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Apr 24, 2014 23:52
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TheBigBad posted:I use small blank books that fit in my pocket. You can find them at target near the moleskins in packs of 3. Its smaller than you're looking for, but filling them up and starting a new one feels good like a ritual. Sorry, not what you were asking for. What about a situation where I don't completely trust that if I ask for their help that it will be directed in the right direction? I have gone down that path before (before I recognized or even thought I had ADHD) where I asked for help. The response was that I needed a kick in the pants and "why can't you just focus? or why can you do (insert hobby) and remember to do that but you can't remember to do (insert necessary task, homework, basic activity I don't want to do)? As I write this I don't think this is a question that you could answer. I just don't feel confident that just my words and a book are going to get across what I want. I would much rather wait and prepare the statement more and get a qualified medical professional to help explain what is going on to them directly. The endgame for me here would be them just backing off the situation a lot and being sympathetic and patient with the process. Edit: One thing I have noticed lately was that I completely missed in school the basic idea of grammar at all. The entire concept was so mind numbingly boring to me I remember effectively none of it. The only grammar knowledge I do have came about through osmosis of just reading and picking things up her and their. I still use apostrophe's in all of the incorrect situations. So bear that in mind while reading my posts. Its not on purpose, I fearfully throw in apostrophes all over the place just on feel alone.
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Apr 25, 2014 00:44
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I've yet to get into the habit of being really organized, but so far I like these planners (I have the small spiral one as that was the only one I could get shipped to Canada at the time, but the bigger or sticky ones might be nice). I really like that you write the dates in, so I don't feel bad for missing days, nor do I have to flip through a bunch of empty ones. Plus you decide what hours you're actually scheduling, which is great for me since sometimes I have to do stuff late or all over the day.
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Apr 25, 2014 00:54
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Chocolate posted:I still use apostrophe's in all of the incorrect situations. So bear that in mind while reading my posts. It puts the lotion on its skin. Baby, it's cold outside. You're funny and so is your face. You will know the goons by their neckbeards. They're sitting over there. (If it's a location it includes "here" in its spelling.) That has been my English teacher moment of the day. You're welcome and so is your face! Oracle posted:...almost no appetite for lunch or breakfast, but if you nag at him to eat he'll take a few bites, realize he's hungry, then dig in like he's starving so he hasn't lost any on the few months he's been on, which is good. quote:If you're having trouble providing that structure, you might want to see about getting yourself tested for ADD. If you can't keep to a routine there's no way you're going to be able to enforce it on your kid. If you find yourself making excuses as to how its more important your kid get help than you or whatever, look at it like putting on the oxygen mask on yourself first on the plane. You're no good to anyone if you can't function. WolfensteinBag posted:Personally, I don't think the diagnosis really equates to, "Ok, lets start meds!" I think a diagnosis would just be good for peace of mind, like you're saying. You would know to approach and handle situations differently, which is a huge plus. I think if I would have had more structure with school/homework growing up, I would have done a lot better from Jr. High on up through college (maybe even actually getting a degree!) It also would have been good to know from a social standpoint, because I was definitely a very sensitive, sad little kid. I think the meds, if they work with little side effects, are just an added bonus. BUT, that also could be because I never took meds as a kid, so I just don't know. I didn't mean to imply that the diagnosis would equate medication immediately, but I will admit to wondering whether my son might have had a more positive perception of school had he had such a powerful tool at his disposal from the start as opposed to seeing himself as a kid the teachers hate and that other kids do not want to be around. It has been a long hard road to encourage him to see himself differently. Every incident at school brought on by trying to get his dosages right or failing to get food in his guts reverses some of that progress. TheBigBad thank you for the book recommendation.
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Apr 25, 2014 01:31
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My organization system is Google Calendar. It's not the best, but I at least get reminders of crucial appointments. I should try that 'small notebook' suggestion. God knows that I have a lot of them - and a lot of other pieces of misc paper where I could make my own. (Oh - cool suggestion when traveling, esp. with ADHD: Carry a small notebook around with you with a pen, and preferably a pocket to put things like bus tickets and the like. In said notebook, you can write down directions, addresses and names of neat stores and other sites, tasks, drawn maps, etc. Better than taking out a phone in a strange idea or in a place with no phone service at all. I do this on some trips, and have found it to be very helpful. For a really cheap one, just go to Kinko's, buy a few sheets of paper, a sheet of thicker paper, and staple it together.)
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Apr 25, 2014 01:47
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Chocolate posted:What about a situation where I don't completely trust that if I ask for their help that it will be directed in the right direction? I have gone down that path before (before I recognized or even thought I had ADHD) where I asked for help. The response was that I needed a kick in the pants and "why can't you just focus? or why can you do (insert hobby) and remember to do that but you can't remember to do (insert necessary task, homework, basic activity I don't want to do)? As I write this I don't think this is a question that you could answer. I just don't feel confident that just my words and a book are going to get across what I want. I would much rather wait and prepare the statement more and get a qualified medical professional to help explain what is going on to them directly. The endgame for me here would be them just backing off the situation a lot and being sympathetic and patient with the process. I think you should at least give them a chance to try. When my wife read the book, she said all of this is so you. The worst that can happen is they don't actually read the book and given that you can effectively say- Your criticism is invalid. You didn't even read the book, so how can you even understand enough to make that (false) judgement. Carve that bubble out for yourself so to speak. If they read it and reject it then at least they tried. Point being- try not to do their part for them. Give em a chance to surprise you  .
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Apr 25, 2014 02:59
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Qu Appelle posted:My organization system is Google Calendar. It's not the best, but I at least get reminders of crucial appointments. Moleskin notebooks have pockets in the back already that are pretty durable if you can afford em
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Apr 25, 2014 05:12
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This is just a general question to people that read this thread but what is your opinion of people that decide that they don't want to pursue medication but continue to not be able to juggle the basic responsibilities of being an adult? I went on a youtube bender today and stumbled upon a guy who was saying that he didn't use stimulants (or any ADHD medication in general) because he was afraid of the side effects and didn't want to stop being himself. Also that he was almost better than other people for not taking the easy way I guess. That line of reasoning just seems stupid as gently caress to me. The side effects of ADHD when your sober can be positive but just as easily negative. The way that I started to make sense of any medication with ADHD is that my "sober" is not really sober at all. Using Adderall or really any medication almost brings me back to a baseline level and in that sense I almost get to a sober level. Now I don't always want to be their at the baseline level but sometimes you have to go to that place if you want to get anything done (medicated). Especially medication is pretty much necessary if your ADHD inattentive type and blowing a couple of hours staring at a wall is just too easy and appealing. I just found so many people that think they are almost better and stronger I guess you would call it if they take this stoic approach and just try and muscle their way through it. Its that stoicism that eats at me, its shortsighted stupid bullshit. To summarize this taking medication is the smart way not the easy (read:lazy) way to handle this right? Are people in this thread pushing towards eventually being un-medicated, like is that your long term goal? My doc really tried to push that line of reasoning with me, adderall was just something to get me on my feet. Its not something that I should consider long term was the general theme of our discussions about stimulants. To me long term use makes sense, maybe eventually get to a point where you use it as more of a tool when you need to do some poo poo that you don't want to do and not a maintenance kind of deal at the beginning but that's a long ways off. I mean it sure would be easy to get off any medication if I made lots of money and did something super creative that I was incredibly passionate about but what happens if you don't get to that point.
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Apr 25, 2014 06:48
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Chocolate posted:This is just a general question to people that read this thread but what is your opinion of people that decide that they don't want to pursue medication but continue to not be able to juggle the basic responsibilities of being an adult? I went on a youtube bender today and stumbled upon a guy who was saying that he didn't use stimulants (or any ADHD medication in general) because he was afraid of the side effects and didn't want to stop being himself. Also that he was almost better than other people for not taking the easy way I guess. That line of reasoning just seems stupid as gently caress to me. The side effects of ADHD when your sober can be positive but just as easily negative. The way that I started to make sense of any medication with ADHD is that my "sober" is not really sober at all. Using Adderall or really any medication almost brings me back to a baseline level and in that sense I almost get to a sober level. Now I don't always want to be their at the baseline level but sometimes you have to go to that place if you want to get anything done (medicated). Especially medication is pretty much necessary if your ADHD inattentive type and blowing a couple of hours staring at a wall is just too easy and appealing. I just found so many people that think they are almost better and stronger I guess you would call it if they take this stoic approach and just try and muscle their way through it. Its that stoicism that eats at me, its shortsighted stupid bullshit. To summarize this taking medication is the smart way not the easy (read:lazy) way to handle this right? Are people in this thread pushing towards eventually being un-medicated, like is that your long term goal? My doc really tried to push that line of reasoning with me, adderall was just something to get me on my feet. Its not something that I should consider long term was the general theme of our discussions about stimulants. To me long term use makes sense, maybe eventually get to a point where you use it as more of a tool when you need to do some poo poo that you don't want to do and not a maintenance kind of deal at the beginning but that's a long ways off. I mean it sure would be easy to get off any medication if I made lots of money and did something super creative that I was incredibly passionate about but what happens if you don't get to that point. Format your posts a bit more, that was really difficult to read for someone with ADHD. Anyway, I don't like taking meds because they make me borderline antisocial, sweaty and groggy. And I have no access to other meds. I honestly think that's reason enough. You choose what you put into your body, one way or another.
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Apr 25, 2014 07:08
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Sobriety is an improper term. It is also dangerous to use because there are people that abuse our legitimate medication and can have sobriety issues. I recommend using functional in a modern (post industrial) society. Or thriving or whatever flavor of that. I finished my degree without meds. I needed them to push through sophomore and part of junior year (full time with a career pay the mortgage type job). I have spent most of the last year since without meds but highly functional because I was doing physical things that I could see the results of daily before I went to my day job. I rebuilt my deck, painted my house by hand, renovated three rooms and started a side business. The secret- riding bikes. When I developed tendinitis in my hammering arm and tore my miniscus in my knee at the same time I started having to get back on the because the lack of fulfilling demonstrable progress in my personal life left me scattered and unorganized in a high stakes enterprise environment.The major thing you will have to watch out for is that you will have a honey moon period where you become as capable as a normie, but all of the ways you've actually developed organically to barely keep up,will now still be at your disposal. You become super you will pull threads together faster and wait for people to explain something to that you've understood three sentences ago. But then your blain in its elasticity will compensate and the drugs will be working but won't seem like they are, and you'll be relying on your habits. Which is why we say in this thread to use your honeymoon time to develop good habits and processes for getting to places on time, create a ritual to plan your day in the morning. The notebook thing is also a solid piece of advice because 100 % of the top top of the pile with ADHD! CEOs movie producers with box office counts breaking 1.6 billion they all have a unique system that they and their assistant understands. But yeah the honey moon will be over and you'll be left as just plain old Clark Kent again. I've been chiming in on cognitive behavior therapy recently because of how this condition creates traps socially like the ones you perceive in your family dynamics. We don't have the proper tools often to deal with conflict or conflict with those with the sharpest knives (family). And it all is a web. You can be doing fine, then you hurt your knee and everything falls apart. You feel helpless than worthless and falling behind. Having tools... It helps. I recommend when you're at your best and will retain it easily.
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Apr 25, 2014 07:22
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Getting a bike is my number one priority once I get back home from my exchange. I love meds occasionally but I just can't rely on them. It seems very little to do with habits. I just feel physically bad on meds. Can't do exercise, don't want to go outside, don't want to do anything fun. I just want to be productive.
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Apr 25, 2014 07:30
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I'm going to vouch for exercise. Riding bikes works. However, what I found that I absolutely love? Aquajogging  . Yes. Jogging, back and forth, but in the shallow end of a pool. A great, low impact workout, can be meditative, and I don't have to worry about getting spotched by a car not seeing me. Need a little exercise boost? Jumping jacks. I did some right before a job interview phone screen, and I felt focused and calm throughout. (I'm currently unmedicated, save for coffee and aquajogging.)
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Apr 25, 2014 07:32
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Chocolate posted:This is just a general question to people that read this thread but what is your opinion of people that decide that they don't want to pursue medication but continue to not be able to juggle the basic responsibilities of being an adult? I went on a youtube bender today and stumbled upon a guy who was saying that he didn't use stimulants (or any ADHD medication in general) because he was afraid of the side effects and didn't want to stop being himself. Also that he was almost better than other people for not taking the easy way I guess. That line of reasoning just seems stupid as gently caress to me. The side effects of ADHD when your sober can be positive but just as easily negative. The way that I started to make sense of any medication with ADHD is that my "sober" is not really sober at all. Using Adderall or really any medication almost brings me back to a baseline level and in that sense I almost get to a sober level. Now I don't always want to be their at the baseline level but sometimes you have to go to that place if you want to get anything done (medicated). Especially medication is pretty much necessary if your ADHD inattentive type and blowing a couple of hours staring at a wall is just too easy and appealing. I just found so many people that think they are almost better and stronger I guess you would call it if they take this stoic approach and just try and muscle their way through it. Its that stoicism that eats at me, its shortsighted stupid bullshit. To summarize this taking medication is the smart way not the easy (read:lazy) way to handle this right? Are people in this thread pushing towards eventually being un-medicated, like is that your long term goal? My doc really tried to push that line of reasoning with me, adderall was just something to get me on my feet. Its not something that I should consider long term was the general theme of our discussions about stimulants. To me long term use makes sense, maybe eventually get to a point where you use it as more of a tool when you need to do some poo poo that you don't want to do and not a maintenance kind of deal at the beginning but that's a long ways off. I mean it sure would be easy to get off any medication if I made lots of money and did something super creative that I was incredibly passionate about but what happens if you don't get to that point. The goal should be to manage the disorder to the best of the ability you have. If that means medication, go for it. If it means just exercising or taking weird homeopathy stuff, go for it. As long as you aren't hurting your own body in order to deal with it, or becoming homeless and starving then do it. Whether you want to use medication or not is your own personal choice. For me, ADHD in adulthood doesn't really go away. You can't rewire the front part of your brain, so there's no problem with taking adderall to help take the worst symptoms away. I'd love to get down to a lower dosage in the future and even off them since they're so expensive, but they're the best way to manage things right now. Some people are just all I DON'T WANNA DO DRUGS. Their loss.
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Apr 25, 2014 09:37
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Qu Appelle posted:(I'm currently unmedicated, save for coffee and aquajogging.) Can I ask how you're doing with your hearing since you've been off meds? Awhile back, when I was first looking into all this stuff, you were the person that even told me what Auditory Processing Disorder was.  This question is good for anyone who has problems hearing, too. How well does medication help you? Does the help the medication gives you wear off after that honeymoon phase? Do any of your behavioral modifications help with it, or is it something you're just stuck with? (This is what I'm afraid of, but have a feeling is true.) My biggest problem is not hearing things or having conversations and completely forgetting them, or even forgetting what someone said in the MIDDLE of a sentence. Or in the middle of one of MY sentences. I mean, you can make your life routine, you can learn to write poo poo down, you can learn to talk your way into working on something for a set amount of time... but how do you "learn" to hear or remember? Just seems odd to me. The hearing/memory thing is a huge strain for me. No matter how many short cuts I use, like asking for people to repeat themselves, or using context to figure things out, it still feels like some people think I'm doing it on purpose. Yeah, because I LIKE having to have things repeated to me! I LIKE forgetting entire conversations!  It's just frustrating. I really try to be polite about it, but it seems like there's no "right" way for me. If I try to give it a minute and figure out what someone said, I don't care enough to ask. If I DO ask, then I wasn't listening and get poo poo for not hearing in the first place. I just feel like I can't win. So I'm afraid that even if I go on meds and it helps me focus, that it's going to wear off and I still won't be able to remember anything or hear anything anyone says.Here's another thing that just popped into my head! Obviously ADHD messes with the way your brain processes things. So, do any of you get visual snow? My sister and I both have it, and at least one of her kids has it, too. I just thought it would be interesting if the percentage of people with visual snow was higher in the ADHD population. I also have TERRIBLE eyesight, too, so that could be why I get it, but I thought it interesting enough to ask.
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Apr 25, 2014 11:54
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Oh, my hearing's absolute crap in noisy environments, but I'm dealing. Luckily it's ok on the phone, as I'm getting phone interviews for jobs.  Finding the loudest, most jarring, most obnoxious ringtone oh my phone also helped, now I can actually hear it ring when I'm out and about.I've also been doing a lot of solitary stuff, and I don't need to hear that well when I'm one of those douches who holes up in a trendy coffee shop with a MacBook Air and a latte. But I went to a bar last week, and I got fed up after an hour or so. So, I just retreated into my default mode of sitting and watching everyone else talk and socialize. I don't get visual snow, but that's just me. Qu Appelle fucked around with this message at 17:16 on Apr 25, 2014 |
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Apr 25, 2014 17:07
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I'm really tired of forgetting what I was going to say right in the middle of saying it, blanking out, stuttering, etc. It's affecting my speech and public writing pretty badly and that's one symptom that doesn't seem to have diminished. I've always had it but I was a seriously talkative child. Like, never shutting up, punished by standing in the hall for a good 20-30 minutes every day, sometimes multiple times a day. Making noises to myself, that kind of thing. Then I got older and started talking much, much less. where it got to the point where I barely got a few words in for weeks, to anyone. My mind is racing too fast for my speech to catch up with it and I'm constantly tripping over myself, stuttering. It's painful. I feel more comfortable writing privately, at least, but what are some good ways to work on being able to actually speak?
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Apr 25, 2014 17:26
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bad posts ahead!!! posted:I'm really tired of forgetting what I was going to say right in the middle of saying it, blanking out, stuttering, etc. It's affecting my speech and public writing pretty badly and that's one symptom that doesn't seem to have diminished. I've always had it but I was a seriously talkative child. Like, never shutting up, punished by standing in the hall for a good 20-30 minutes every day, sometimes multiple times a day. Making noises to myself, that kind of thing. Know what you're talking about inside and out, and just be honest. I get tripped up really only once I have to start keeping track of what I've already said. If I'm doing any kind of public speaking, it's stream of consciousness, just on an already beaten path.
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Apr 25, 2014 17:36
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Just want to write quick huge thank you for the book advice. Delivered from Distraction is fantastic, my husband and daughter are being described completely, and I'm teary at the 2nd chapter at how loving hard the most trivial seeming things can be. You all are amazing, and strong, and brave.
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Apr 25, 2014 19:20
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