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I drive 10 minutes to work on back roads, sometimes I see one other vehicle on the way to the blowjob factory
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Apr 5, 2017 19:22
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| # ? Jun 8, 2024 13:02 |
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my bat mitzvah ROCKED posted:I drive 10 minutes to work on back roads, sometimes I see one other vehicle on the way to the blowjob factory Do you get your own parking spot as the blowjobber of the month for the last 48 months at the blowjob factory where you give blowjobs?
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Apr 5, 2017 19:26
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Ive been driving on the high way a lot more, and i noticed how lovely people are. they speed aggressively, block attempts to let you into a lane, and a personal pet peeve, dont turn on their blinkers when they change lanes!! It's already proven that speeding doesnt get you anywhere much more quickly, so why are you being a dick and putting everyone at a higher risk of death
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Apr 5, 2017 19:31
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Altho i also hate slow drivers so maybe cars make me really angry
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Apr 5, 2017 19:32
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I drive to work on a 2 lane highway heavily patrolled by rear end in a top hat police. I go 5 over in the left lane because the right lane is full of slowpoke idiots. However, this does not stop me from refusing to move for the guy going 20 over behind me and flashing his brights. Sometimes I slow down to the right lane speed when I'm next to another car to show him how bad he could have it. If you're going to drive like a maniac, be prepared to have to slalom around me when I'm already speeding.
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Apr 5, 2017 19:35
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Edgar Allan Pwned posted:Altho i also hate slow drivers so maybe cars make me really angry Driving is a boring, menial task but despite that it requires close attention. It's one of the worst activities in life.
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Apr 5, 2017 19:43
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see OP i like where your head is at but i think that might not solve the problem. no, see, what we really need are little flying robot drones that patrol all the highways and freeways, and whenever they detect a vehicle going, lets say 15 miles under the limit, they give them a verbal warning accompanied by some lights and such, right? then, if after say, 10 seconds or so, if the vehicle is not back up to speed, they use disintegration rays to remove the vehicle and driver from the roadway. that way people could keep going at a good pace, right? see the death animation in Rax's stage from the video game Eternal Champions for more information on how these drones might work
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Apr 5, 2017 19:51
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new phone who dis posted:I drive to work on a 2 lane highway heavily patrolled by rear end in a top hat police. I go 5 over in the left lane because the right lane is full of slowpoke idiots. However, this does not stop me from refusing to move for the guy going 20 over behind me and flashing his brights. Sometimes I slow down to the right lane speed when I'm next to another car to show him how bad he could have it. If you're going to drive like a maniac, be prepared to have to slalom around me when I'm already speeding. or you could just move over for a second and let them go by instead of playing self-righteous road nanny
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Apr 5, 2017 19:55
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Oh yeah people suck at driving but let's talk about jerking off in the shower cause I have to say I'm intrigued. How do you get the pornography into the shower?
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Apr 5, 2017 19:56
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Jim Barris posted:Oh yeah people suck at driving but let's talk about jerking off in the shower cause I have to say I'm intrigued. How do you get the pornography into the shower? you put your cellphone in a airtight plastic bag duh
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Apr 5, 2017 19:57
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Jim Barris posted:Oh yeah people suck at driving but let's talk about jerking off in the shower cause I have to say I'm intrigued. How do you get the pornography into the shower? Print out your favorite porn pics and then have them laminated. You could have a whole stack of them sitting on the toilet tank ready for use.
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Apr 5, 2017 19:58
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wuffles posted:or you could just move over for a second and let them go by instead of playing self-righteous road nanny Wouldn't it be tight if everyone was chill to each other? Jim Barris posted:Oh yeah people suck at driving but let's talk about jerking off in the shower cause I have to say I'm intrigued. How do you get the pornography into the shower? I have a standup shower/toilet closet and it is my favorite because I can wedge my phone well away from any water and watch whatever I want while viciously pounding my w33n0r.
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Apr 5, 2017 20:04
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Just get a waterproof phone, duh.
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Apr 5, 2017 20:05
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Dave_Indeed posted:Do you get your own parking spot as the blowjobber of the month for the last 48 months at the blowjob factory where you give blowjobs? 
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Apr 5, 2017 20:08
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You don't need to have porn every time you jackoff. Just think about some boobies you touched once jeez.
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Apr 5, 2017 20:11
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Chomp8645 posted:You don't need to have porn every time you jackoff. Just think about some boobies you touched once jeez.
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Apr 5, 2017 20:13
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Pitdragon posted:see OP i like where your head is at but i think that might not solve the problem. this is a good idea. or maybe all cars should have spin capability like in F-Zero X. so when dipshits get in a wreck and start slowing down traffic, the next guy behind them can use a spin attack to launch their destroyed cars off the road/bridge
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Apr 5, 2017 20:15
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Jim Barris posted:Yeah I did that in jail and guess what, it sucked. Plus it takes way way longer to finish. You didn't look at the other men's butts in the shower to help you finish?
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Apr 5, 2017 20:17
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new phone who dis posted:I drive to work on a 2 lane highway heavily patrolled by rear end in a top hat police. I go 5 over in the left lane because the right lane is full of slowpoke idiots. However, this does not stop me from refusing to move for the guy going 20 over behind me and flashing his brights. Sometimes I slow down to the right lane speed when I'm next to another car to show him how bad he could have it. If you're going to drive like a maniac, be prepared to have to slalom around me when I'm already speeding. this is the only thing that upsets me while driving. if you know that the left lane is for passing slower traffic and even bitch about "slowpoke idiots," then why can't you just loving move over for five seconds and let people by? you're already admitting that you also drive over the speed limit, so why does it matter just how fast they are going? if they're going faster than you just move over. you seriously must be pretty stupid if you're going to complain about someone that "drive[s] like a maniac" but also force them to "slalom around" on a two-lane highway. i mean it's either that or you know that it's stupid and you're just the biggest piece of poo poo in the thread. like i said i don't really get upset about anything else that happens in traffic but I have an hour-and-a-half commute each way on a two-lane highway with a speed limit of around 80 and this really gets on my nerves. it's basically the only thing someone can do that will legitimately hold up traffic; you'll have self-righteous assholes like this blocking the left lane so that nobody can go and a line of cars will accumulate over ten deep but they still don't care. i started throwing change at people's windshields who do this after i finally drive past them. change or trash or empty water bottles or whatever if i don't have any change, but i prefer the change because it has the potential to crack/chip the windshield. and once i threw a 1/3 full tropical smoothie cup into someone's open widow for doing this.
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Apr 5, 2017 20:21
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you should go to jail for a week if you're willing to live in a city crowded and polluted enough to have a 'rush hour'
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Apr 5, 2017 20:22
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I can't wait until robots are doing all the driving.
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Apr 5, 2017 20:23
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cda posted:It's not. It's because you don't trust that when you get to the merge point, the assholes in the lane you're merging into won't scooch their car right up to the bumper of the car in front of them and give you an angry glare as you sit there unable to merge in. Maybe you should merge the way the lines literally painted on the ground tell you to, bithc. wuffles posted:or you could just move over for a second and let them go by instead of playing self-righteous road nanny Charles Mansion posted:Driving is a boring, menial task but despite that it requires close attention. It's one of the worst activities in life. It's actually cool and good, but unless you're actually on the Autobahn, I don't care how tiny your dick is, you're not on the Autobahn, don't drive like a fuckwit, use proper time management. You can only go as fast as the traffic will let you, learn to be Zen about your tiny dick. The Walrus posted:zipper merging is the most efficient. but ya. If only people actually knew the contents of those Rules of the Road book thingies they have at the DMV... what a magical world that would be. Did you know you have to actually come to a full stop at a stop sign? 
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Apr 5, 2017 20:25
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so if a self-driving car is programmed to minimize human casualties, and it gets into a situation where minimizing human casualties means killing the driver instead of a bunch of kids in the street or something, how funny would it be exactly?
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Apr 5, 2017 20:26
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Plenty O Lentils! posted:once i threw a 1/3 full tropical smoothie cup into someone's open widow for doing this. Hell yeah. COMRADES posted:I can't wait until robots are doing all the driving. Same, although apparently idiots with manually driven poor people cars can still rear end you like the google car just recently.
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Apr 5, 2017 20:28
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IT BURNS posted:Should they also be r..rr..r....r...raped? yes
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Apr 5, 2017 20:28
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It's gonna be great to be able to drink and not have to call an uber or a taxi.
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Apr 5, 2017 20:29
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The other week it took an hour longer than usual to get home because some loving dummy had run out of petrol on the busiest bridge in the city. Cars backed up for kilometres on the freeway because this of this fucknut and his poor planning but I doubt he even got a fine
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Apr 5, 2017 20:30
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Secular Humanist posted:so if a self-driving car is programmed to minimize human casualties, and it gets into a situation where minimizing human casualties means killing the driver instead of a bunch of kids in the street or something, how funny would it be exactly? *everyone realizes this and checks "20 child passengers" on their icar daily login screen*
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Apr 5, 2017 20:32
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Secular Humanist posted:so if a self-driving car is programmed to minimize human casualties, and it gets into a situation where minimizing human casualties means killing the driver instead of a bunch of kids in the street or something, how funny would it be exactly? Why wouldn't the car just hit the brakes?
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Apr 5, 2017 20:34
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Going to jail because of a crash during rush hour? But what about the drivers that are playing pokemon go with one hand, smoking with the other, and steering with their knee (I'll let you decide which knee)?
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Apr 5, 2017 20:35
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fuckin Americans referring to lanes along a left-right axis as though the directionality is the same everywhere i bet if I did the same youd all get confused and post dumb messages about "hurr you reversed left and right"
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Apr 5, 2017 20:40
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It is the same everywhere except areas where British imperialism made people drive the wrong way.
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Apr 5, 2017 20:51
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Plenty O Lentils! posted:this is the only thing that upsets me while driving. if you know that the left lane is for passing slower traffic and even bitch about "slowpoke idiots," then why can't you just loving move over for five seconds and let people by? you're already admitting that you also drive over the speed limit, so why does it matter just how fast they are going? if they're going faster than you just move over. you seriously must be pretty stupid if you're going to complain about someone that "drive[s] like a maniac" but also force them to "slalom around" on a two-lane highway. i mean it's either that or you know that it's stupid and you're just the biggest piece of poo poo in the thread. If you're going 20 over you've crossed the line into reckless driving and I'm not leaving the lane to join the slowpoke idiots so you can continue your mania. Bonus points for being the type of crazy fucker who throws things at people when you don't get your way.
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Apr 5, 2017 20:54
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COMRADES posted:It is the same everywhere except areas where British imperialism made people drive the wrong way. I didn't know Glorious Nippon was so strongly touched by the Empire but ok if you say so
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Apr 5, 2017 20:58
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Hammerite posted:I didn't know Glorious Nippon was so strongly touched by the Empire but ok if you say so quote:Three countries approached the Japanese government to help them build a railway system. These three countries were America, France, and Britain. In the end, Britain won out. In 1872 the first Japanese railway was up and running thanks to the British. A massive network of railways spread out from there, all of which were left-side running. And as we all know, Japan loves their trains. If American or French railways had been built instead, Japan would probably be driving on the right side of the road today. Also Europe had de facto rulership over China and Japan for decades. The more you know! COMRADES fucked around with this message at 21:03 on Apr 5, 2017 |
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Apr 5, 2017 20:59
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Hammerite posted:I didn't know Glorious Nippon was so strongly touched by the Empire but ok if you say so hey man, I'm choking down my rage filled bile at seeing someone call gas "petrol," in this thread but choosing to be a bigger man and not post about it. let's all just chill out and look over our cultural differences
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Apr 5, 2017 21:00
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COMRADES posted:Why wouldn't the car just hit the brakes? because in my hypothetical scenario it can't just hit the brakes because hitting the brakes would also kill the driver too because physics. basically the driver or the group of kids has to die and the car is programmed to prefer killing the driver, because sanctity of life
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Apr 5, 2017 21:03
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The motorway by my town is closed at least once a week during rush hour because some bunch of inattentive morons decided to drive into each other instead of on the road, like they're supposed to. Seize these idiot's property and use the proceeds to reimburse the thousands of people who lost time that day due to these twats inability to look at the road ahead while in charge of a loving motor vehicle.
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Apr 5, 2017 21:03
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Well no one would buy that car though. Studies show people like the concept of the "greater good" programming but when asked if they would buy that care they say nope and prefer the "selfish" car programming. Besides there's no guarantee those pedestrians wouldn't be killed anyway thus you save the life you know you can save (the driver's). quote:In comments published last week by Car and Driver, Mercedes-Benz executive Christoph von Hugo said that the carmaker’s future autonomous cars will save the car’s driver and passengers, even if that means sacrificing the lives of pedestrians, in a situation where those are the only two options. But yeah trolley problem is interesting to think about. 
COMRADES fucked around with this message at 21:08 on Apr 5, 2017 |
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Apr 5, 2017 21:05
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| # ? Jun 8, 2024 13:02 |
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I don't drive on the motorway myself: I'm just mad on behalf of the people who do.
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Apr 5, 2017 21:06
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