A guy cut off his own dick and took police on a 30 mile chase.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > A guy cut off his own dick and took police on a 30 mile chase.

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Ralph Hurley: Aug 3, 2009

This reminded me of that story from a few years ago where some rapper guy who claimed to be part of Wu Tang Clan chopped off his dick and threw it off the top of a building after smoking dust, then when the story broke RZA made a statement to make it clear that hell no, that dumb rear end was never associated with Wu Tang.

# ? Sep 2, 2021 18:09

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# ? May 26, 2024 07:00

DamnCanadian: Jan 3, 2005; Perpetuating the stereotype since 1978.

nut posted:

drat, this guy is totally nuts

# ? Sep 2, 2021 18:14

mom and dad fight a lot: Sep 21, 2006; If you count them all, this sentence has exactly seventy-two characters.

nut posted:

drat, this guy is totally nuts

# ? Sep 2, 2021 18:15

numberoneposter: Feb 19, 2014; How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

free willy

# ? Sep 2, 2021 18:41

mom and dad fight a lot: Sep 21, 2006; If you count them all, this sentence has exactly seventy-two characters.

Well that's one way to cut and run

# ? Sep 2, 2021 18:59

mom and dad fight a lot: Sep 21, 2006; If you count them all, this sentence has exactly seventy-two characters.

quote:

A Tennessee man allegedly flung his own severed penis out of his car window during a police chase last week�and said voices on the radio told him to do it in order to save the world.

Tyson Gilbert, 39, had parked his car partially blocking the highway when police first approached him in Dowelltown. After the cops hit their lights to pull him over, he took off.

The chase involved multiple police departments and two branches of the Tennessee Highway Patrol, according to Newsweek.

At some point during the chase, he ditched his own dick out of the window of his Honda Accord like a banana on a Mario Kart track.

When asked for comment, police reported that Mr G. from Tennessee had set free his pee pee.

# ? Sep 2, 2021 19:12

DONKEY SALAMI: Jun 28, 2008; donkey? donkey?

Police officer in pursuit:

# ? Sep 2, 2021 19:13

The Bloop: Jul 5, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

Colonel Cancer posted:

World hasn't ended yet, maybe he had a point.

I have some ghost repellent to sell you

# ? Sep 2, 2021 19:22

BAGS FLY AT NOON: Apr 6, 2011; A Soft Nylon Bag

Cutting my dick off too.*

By �cutting� I mean tugging on it until it cums and then having a nap.

# ? Sep 2, 2021 19:34

Colonel Cancer: Sep 26, 2015; Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

The Bloop posted:

I have some ghost repellent to sell you

How does it work?

# ? Sep 2, 2021 21:30

Ralph Hurley: Aug 3, 2009

The trooper who pulled him over is named Johnson :lol:

# ? Sep 2, 2021 22:18

The Bloop: Jul 5, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

Colonel Cancer posted:

How does it work?

very, very well

guaranteed

# ? Sep 2, 2021 22:24

Chief McHeath: Apr 23, 2002

And to think he just paid registration fees on his custom WNRMBL license plate.

# ? Sep 2, 2021 22:35

wesleywillis: Dec 30, 2016; SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!

Does anyone know if this guy is a goon?
Because in the Anonymous confessions thread, we often tell people that they should cut their dick off to solve their problems.

# ? Sep 3, 2021 00:30