Microsoft: ~*spooky thread*~ post if you dare

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > Microsoft: ~*spooky thread*~ post if you dare

«‹›1152 »

cinci zoo sniper: Mar 15, 2013

infernal machines posted:

:snype:

# ? Feb 13, 2015 19:27

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 10, 2024 06:41

graph: Nov 22, 2006; aaag peanuts

infernal machines posted:

this is also after a screen in which its white text on a black bg lol

# ? Feb 13, 2015 19:30

Metrication: Dec 12, 2010; Raskin had one problem: Jobs regarded him as an insufferable theorist or, to use Jobs's own more precise terminology, "a shithead who sucks".

graph posted:

you missed the best one

i'm the links that look like a paragraph of random copy

# ? Feb 13, 2015 19:31

graph: Nov 22, 2006; aaag peanuts

Metrication posted:

i'm the links that look like a paragraph of random copy

let's place bets on wether or not this will end up in the release version

i'm in $100 for 'lol yes'

# ? Feb 13, 2015 19:34

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

i know the answer is "lol, microsoft" but seriously

how the gently caress do you get from the clean, functional, if a little goofy metro UI of winpho7 to this abomination in only two major revisions?

who the gently caress spent the last four years watching this byzantine clusterfuck of directionless poo poo accreting on their platform and said, yes, this is what we want to ship?

# ? Feb 13, 2015 19:39

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; OFFICIAL #1 GNOME FAN

Lysidas posted:

also usually need ISO images to install into VMs, i dont think i have ever successfully booted a vmware vm from a usb drive

its actually real easy to do this?

# ? Feb 13, 2015 19:41

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; OFFICIAL #1 GNOME FAN

graph posted:

this is also after a screen in which its white text on a black bg lol

they keep switching between white on black and black on white for some reason even though the article says the phone's theme color is purple lol

they basically did the same thing on desktop. "don't like our new design? oh well fucker, less choices for you now"

# ? Feb 13, 2015 19:43

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

Metrication posted:

i'm the links that look like a paragraph of random copy

im general cortana

# ? Feb 13, 2015 19:45

Clockwerk: Apr 6, 2005

im not available in your market

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:00

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

graph posted:

you missed the best one

I'm actually going to use this for an internal blog post about whitespace, thanks microsoft

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:04

Wiggly Wayne DDS: Sep 11, 2010

another update hits the fan https://isc.sans.edu/diary/Microsoft+February+Patch+Failures+Continue%3A+KB3023607+vs.+Cisco+AnyConnect+Client/19331

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:04

NyetscapeNavigator: Sep 22, 2003

Search
_{_{_SafeSearch}}

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:08

Cocoa Crispies: Jul 20, 2001; Vehicular Manslaughter!; Pillbug

infernal machines posted:

"Hello there Dr. Pizza, what will your first sequence of the day be?"

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:10

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; OFFICIAL #1 GNOME FAN

Wiggly Wayne DDS posted:

another update hits the fan https://isc.sans.edu/diary/Microsoft+February+Patch+Failures+Continue%3A+KB3023607+vs.+Cisco+AnyConnect+Client/19331

lol

did they pull this one too?

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:10

Sapozhnik: Jan 2, 2005; Nap Ghost

Cocoa Crispies posted:

"Hello there Dr. Pizza, what will your first sequence of the day be?"

Can I get a printout of Ballmer sweating?

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:15

Cocoa Crispies: Jul 20, 2001; Vehicular Manslaughter!; Pillbug

Mr Dog posted:

Can I get a printout of Ballmer sweating?

Cortana, is there any way you can generate a nude cortana ejaculating on a bowl of weetabix?

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:16

Dolomite: Jul 26, 2000; Cars & Legs

Wiggly Wayne DDS posted:

another update hits the fan https://isc.sans.edu/diary/Microsoft+February+Patch+Failures+Continue%3A+KB3023607+vs.+Cisco+AnyConnect+Client/19331

update rollup 5 for dpm 2012 r2 causes the console to hang hours (or a couple of reboots) after the update. the backup jobs still run.

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:22

mod sassinator: Dec 13, 2006; I came here to Kick Ass and Chew Bubblegum,
and I'm All out of Ass

Wiggly Wayne DDS posted:

another update hits the fan https://isc.sans.edu/diary/Microsoft+February+Patch+Failures+Continue%3A+KB3023607+vs.+Cisco+AnyConnect+Client/19331

getting rid of all their testers was a great idea. the lols just continue

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:25

MrMoo: Sep 14, 2000

beta tested in the future!

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:29

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

mod sassinator posted:

getting rid of all their testers was a great idea. the lols just continue

yeah but they saved a bunch of money a few quarters ago surely there will be no repercussions for that

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:41

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

MrMoo posted:

beta tested in the future!

# ? Feb 13, 2015 20:52

HAIL eSATA-n: Apr 7, 2007

qirex posted:

yeah but they saved a bunch of money a few quarters ago surely there will be no repercussions for that

execs already got their bonuses, now when they hire new QA people the execs can get bonuses again for solving the problem

thanks business degree

# ? Feb 13, 2015 21:29

havelock: Jan 20, 2004; IGNORE ME; Soiled Meat

infernal machines posted:

i know the answer is "lol, microsoft" but seriously

how the gently caress do you get from the clean, functional, if a little goofy metro UI of winpho7 to this abomination in only two major revisions?

who the gently caress spent the last four years watching this byzantine clusterfuck of directionless poo poo accreting on their platform and said, yes, this is what we want to ship?

You take the well designed phone interface and then force it into a tablet and desktop paradigm. Then, when it turns out that doesn't work at all, you hack in adjustments to the design to make it less awful on the desktop. Then, in the name of consistency, you force all of that poo poo backwards onto the phone.

# ? Feb 13, 2015 23:08

Phoenixan: Jan 16, 2010; Just Keep Cool-idge

it's like getting feedback from a sewage line

# ? Feb 13, 2015 23:09

Last Chance: Dec 31, 2004

Phoenixan posted:

it's like getting feedback from a sewage line

if i didn't love this thread's title already i'd say this would be a contender

# ? Feb 13, 2015 23:11

Sapozhnik: Jan 2, 2005; Nap Ghost

there is an Iain M Banks novel where the badguy protagonists hijack like a 50km long seagoing ship and it crashes into a continent sized glacier or something and it takes them like 15 minutes to figure out what's in the process of happening and how truly hosed they are and that kinda seems like what is happening watching microsoft eat itself over the course of the past 5-10 years

also shortly after that one of the dudes jumps off the edge of something rly tall and has some sort of anti-gravity jetpack that doesn't engage because lol you fuckin idiot you're on a rotating space station not a gravity well and then some other guy gets hella mad and sets off a backpack nuke that he's carrying around, idk how that fits in to this metaphor but i'm sure it can be made to

anybody happen to know which book this is? it sounds like weird fever dream poo poo so maybe i just imagined that i read this book idk.

# ? Feb 13, 2015 23:15

Just-In-Timeberlake: Aug 18, 2003

Mr Dog posted:

there is an Iain M Banks novel where the badguy protagonists hijack like a 50km long seagoing ship and it crashes into a continent sized glacier or something and it takes them like 15 minutes to figure out what's in the process of happening and how truly hosed they are and that kinda seems like what is happening watching microsoft eat itself over the course of the past 5-10 years

also shortly after that one of the dudes jumps off the edge of something rly tall and has some sort of anti-gravity jetpack that doesn't engage because lol you fuckin idiot you're on a rotating space station not a gravity well and then some other guy gets hella mad and sets off a backpack nuke that he's carrying around, idk how that fits in to this metaphor but i'm sure it can be made to

anybody happen to know which book this is? it sounds like weird fever dream poo poo so maybe i just imagined that i read this book idk.

consider Phlebas

# ? Feb 13, 2015 23:18

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

Mr Dog posted:

anybody happen to know which book this is? it sounds like weird fever dream poo poo so maybe i just imagined that i read this book idk.

that's in consider phlebas [not the best one but that scene owns a lot]

# ? Feb 13, 2015 23:18

Michael Transactions: Nov 11, 2013

my rear end in a top hat has been lose all day and poo poo is just sliding out of my rear end in a top hat all dang day!!!!!!!

# ? Feb 13, 2015 23:22

Just-In-Timeberlake: Aug 18, 2003

double dip posted:

my rear end in a top hat has been lose all day and poo poo is just sliding out of my rear end in a top hat all dang day!!!!!!!

guess you ate...a banini

yeeeeaaaaaahhhhhhhh

# ? Feb 13, 2015 23:24

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

thats how people tend to react to reading thurrott.com

# ? Feb 13, 2015 23:29

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

kegels bro, kegels

# ? Feb 13, 2015 23:30

Pinterest Mom: Jun 9, 2009

"Bro kegels" - the hot new trend sweeping silicon valley.

# ? Feb 14, 2015 00:09

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

Pinterest Mom posted:

"Bro kegels" - the hot new trend sweeping silicon valley.

http://www.amazon.com/How-Good-bye-Depression-Constrict-Everyday/dp/0595094724

# ? Feb 14, 2015 00:10

Wheany: Mar 17, 2006; Spinya^{ha^{ha^haha}ha}ha_{ha_{ha_haha}ha}ha!; Doctor Rope

Wiggly Wayne DDS posted:

another update hits the fan https://isc.sans.edu/diary/Microsoft+February+Patch+Failures+Continue%3A+KB3023607+vs.+Cisco+AnyConnect+Client/19331

i'm becoming a broken record here but "let's fire all the qa people" lol

# ? Feb 14, 2015 00:38

Korean Boomhauer: Sep 4, 2008

duTrieux. posted:

it's very likely that that was not a microsoft employee, but rather a third-party contractor that specializes in product evangelization. depending on where this was, probably sourced through mosaic

the one i ended up going to the guy did a q&a at the end and when the hard questions started rolling in he had to tell them he actually had no idea and he wasnt 'an engineer'

# ? Feb 14, 2015 18:36

cthulhoo: Jun 18, 2012

carry on then posted:

Program Files (x86)

syswow64 lmao

# ? Feb 14, 2015 18:55

moron izzard: Nov 17, 2006; Grimey Drawer

infernal machines posted:

tile sizes are user set, i don't believe you can enforce a min or max size, you just have to provide assets for each possible size

you can prevent them from being semi-transparent now apparently

You could always have a lovely non modern ui icon for your app that didnt color theme match / go transparent if you wanted. Even Microsoft still has a few that are in the modern ui style, but won't match the color theme or do the transparent background thing (gently caress u ms). The only stuff they really changed on the main screen is double height medium tiles, double height large tiles, and whatever the gently caress that music hub thing is (I assume its all just one button and brings xbox music and podcasts together, again, after they already separated them in 8.1).

That guy has the worst setup. All medium sized tiles and up like hes designing a windows phone for Jitterbug

also