Dial-a-Dog posted:

I think he is, and he's just stuck in a broke brained idiot PUA mindset, but regardless the girl should've blocked him on Facebook and told him to gently caress off after that "you used to be hot" nonsense

Pick posted:

Negging is really goddamn dumb and when it works, it only works on people with such low self-esteem they'd have slept with you anyway.

Doc Hawkins posted:

Well, yeah. Every aspect of PUA is about tricking socially crippled men into actually going out and meeting women, and arming them with techniques to rapidly find the ones with accessibly low self-esteem.

Doc Hawkins posted:

Well, yeah. Every aspect of PUA is about tricking socially crippled men into actually going out and meeting women, and arming them with techniques to rapidly find the ones with accessibly low self-esteem.

Nuebot posted:

The "best" part is that it isn't even actually effective. They'll talk themselves up about how many women they sleep with, but they literally just try every person in the room until they find the one that can be insulted into sex. Of course if you throw enough darts at the board eventually some will hit. That doesn't mean you're good at darts.

quote:

Can you help me find ways to deal with favoritism and repair my familiy?

I have a 'favorite' kid. I have two sons, five and two. The five year old is my adoptive son, my wife is his biological mother. I met my wife when he was a little over a year old. I didn't know poo poo about parenting, but I loved this woman and I believed in adoption (I'd rather give a kid who doesn't have a Dad a good Dad than make a whole extra kid). I did my best and believed I was doing pretty good learning-to-parent on the fly . We were married shortly after his second birthday.

But while I believe in adoption, I felt a stronger emotional bond with our 2yr old. And this came about due to a shitstorm of events that occurred when my wife was 7mo pregnant with him. It was an exceptionally hard pregnancy involving a few hospitalizations. During one of these I overheard my wife telling the doctor this was the second time she had given birth, and this confused me because of something I haven't yet explained.

When I learned that my then-girlfriend had a child she was in care of, she explained it that biologically he was her nephew, and her way younger half-brother (who i've never met and isn't in our lives) had knocked up some chick and they weren't able to take care of him so she took him in as her own. I thought this was very sweet and it played a big role in seeing that she was a really good person, someone I'd want to be married to. We married and she got pregnant with our now 2yr old while I was under this presumption. When she told the doctor that this was her second birth I was like "uuh what?" and then she proceeded to explain that he wasn't in fact her biological nephew, but in fact her own, his biological dad was a sadistic manipulative bad person. I won't get into the details of what she said but to put it short, she had to escape this crazy guy shortly after he was born and fabricated this newphew story in the interest of protecting herself and her son, for fear that I might have been sent by him to track her down or something.

Well I didn't handle that the best. I can understand fabricating the story but I feel like she still should have said something before we got married and transitioned from referring to me as "Mr. anon" to "Dad" in front of our son, and even moreso before we started to add another child. And to mix in with this clusterfuck period of my life, another thing I learned from her conversations with her doctor while i was present that it wasn't me that brought genital herpes into our relationship like she had led me to believe, but rather the other way around(she told the doctor how long she had it, longer than we had been together). So basically she was 7mo pregnant and I was really pissed feeling like I had completely been taking for a ride.

Anyway its in the past, I've forgiven her for it, life goes on. She is still an amazing woman that I am obscenely lucky to be with! But for a large part I was way harder on my oldest son than our now 2yr old. I'd get mad when he'd make a mess or misbehave or whatever. Kids are kids and I've worked on changing my strategy for dealing with conflict from "get mad and yell and be distant" to "calm down and clean up the mess, jesus christ we have food and a roof over our heads whats the big deal, he is a child. Let's just go sit down in the other room and talk about this for a minute and get on with our day".

To be clear, I wasn't beating him or anything. But I was using abusive language and witholding parental affection (something my Dad did to me and my brother). The whole situation brought out the absolute worst in my parenting.

My wife has resented me a lot for this behavior - and understandably so. I started out strong as a "yeah I can totally do this parenting thing, our kid is awesome" to "ugh i can't stand dealing with this child on top of this newborn". I'd be pissed too. I get it and I'm very understanding when she's upset about this kind of stuff and I recognize that it's going to take a lot of time to repair this wound. What I'm asking for, e/n, is strategies to undo favoritism and strategies for communicating with my wife what I'm doing to improve the situation.

On top of that, my wife refuses to go through with the official adoption paperwork for him so I can legally be his father. This is a big deal for me and its only going to become a worse problem. He's currently being taught in pre-k to use my last name even though his legal name hasn't yet changed. We absolutely need to move past this ideally before he starts public school next fall.

On top of _that_, we have a 3rd child due in 5 months. Since I'm dumping I'll dump this out too. After 2yr old was born, I was so seething mad that I got a vasectomy. My wife went along with it but she wasn't really happy about it. Turns out she wanted a girl really bad (and hey our third is girl! Yay!). We looked into adoption/foster care but ended up doing IVF and here we are. I think I'm much better hardened for this but I'm still nervous about it because pregnancy/newborns are always a big emotional challenge.

I'm trying my best to balance all this stuff while also holding down my job as the sole breadwinner. I recognize that I'm entirely responsible for the situation, I should have been a better man handling when this baggage arrived. I'm just asking for advice.

whew. thanks. i feel a lot better having typed all that out.

Waterbed Wendy posted:

It's a pretty huge deal not to tell someone you are about to commit to for the rest of your life that your nephew is actually your child. I wouldn't know if I could trust that person ever again.

Welp good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Waterbed Wendy posted:

It's a pretty huge deal not to tell someone you are about to commit to for the rest of your life that your nephew is actually your child. I wouldn't know if I could trust that person ever again.

Welp good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

quote:

she proceeded to explain that he wasn't in fact her biological nephew, but in fact her own [child], and his biological dad she was is a sadistic manipulative bad person.

Pick posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nAYBET6rmFo

Groovelord Neato posted:

this is pretty accurate. it's how dating apps work.

the dad porn one is kinda funny in a sad way to me cuz someone at work is a old hardcore republican (to the point he was a republican elector) and was pumped trump won but when you go his comp it's all cuck porn (like big black dudes slamming white women).

Griefor posted:

Wait, so this guy not only has a porn stash on his work pc, but doesn't even hide it from his coworkers?

quote:

My[25m] gf[22F] racist family doing everything to keep us apart.

We have been dating for about 6 months but have been friends for 3+ years. She lives about 8 hours away but is moving up to me because of a job opportunity. This is all fine except, she has a daughter [1yr]. Now I love this kid. Like this kid is so amazing and I honestly want the best for both of them.

The issue is, my gf's "mother" (they do not get along and she was not really apart of my gf's life) is upset because she is moving her only grand-daughter 8 hours away. She is also upset because I am black. She even went as far as messaging me on fb telling me that she disapproves because the grandfather is racist as well and will disown my gf once he finds out she is dating me and moving up here.

I have pretty thick skin so this didn't bother me as long as I knew my gf was OK, which she was. She told me that it's best for her baby to be up here with a stable job and in a stable household.

Fast forward to today and my girl tells me that her "mother" called cps on her stating that she was on drugs and they took her daughter until the investigation was over. A few days ago, Her "mother" and husband saw her in public a few and began yelling at her calling her a n*gger lover.

I am shocked and heart broken. How can someone be so against another person's happiness because of the color of the SO's skin? You are willing to drag your own daughter through the mud for your selfish motives?

My girlfriend took a drug test today and what do you know, it comes back negative..

What can we do to keep her mother from pulling this again? We are both shocked. I asked my gf if she wanted to end our relationship because her mom is insane. My gf said she does not and will not over anything with her family.

Tl;Dr Gf's mom was a poo poo mom to her but is now applying for grandmother of the year by calling cps on her Daughter to keep her from moving 8 hours away and because I am a black man...

Update:

CPS called the baby's father and now he is calling my gf. But the dad is actually on drugs. And up until now has been absent in the kids life.

She is pressing charges on the mom. Not sure how that is going to work but I'm behind her 100%..

quote:

[Bisexual] Wife encouraging me to have Bi experience with good friend after she started pegging me. Not sure. (self.sex)
Friend broke up with his girlfriend about 6 months ago and is over at our place A lot. Wife feels sorry for him. He's too busy to have a relationship.
So last weekend he's over hanging out, we are all drinking watching a movie and theirs a pretty hot lesbian sex scene in it and my wife makes a comment about guys being turned on watching two women and says that lots of women get off watching two men.
My friend kinda surprises me and says nothing wrong with that.
So my wife is Horney and tells me she wants to go to bed and tells my friend he can sleep on the couch because we've all been drinking.
A few minutes later she is pounding me in the rear end with a Strapon. I'm worried my friend can hear us and she whispers too me that she is fantasizing she is watching my friend gently caress me and asks me if I would let him gently caress me while she watches. I tell her I don't think he would be into that and says, but if he was, would you do that for me? You let me gently caress you and he's your best friend. If I'm OK with it, and he wanted too? It turns me on so much thinking about. Please say yes. I mumbled, I guess, because I knew it was what she wanted to hear and because I figured my friend would never have any interest in doing it.
So last night my friend is over and we are talking about the long weekend and how much fun we are going to have grilling and drinking. I am cleaning the grill outside and decided to take a shower when we get back in and leave my wife and friend taking.
Later last night my wife says, I talked with your friend and he said he's down with loving you while I watch. He asked me how I knew you would be into that and I told him I had asked you.
I was shocked but I had kind of told her i would. My wife then said you know it's hard for him. He's over all the time and you know he lays the couch listening to us loving on the other side of the wall and he has no one. I thought you might want to help him out and let him gently caress you and suck him off sometimes. I mean, it's not like you don't suck my strapon and lick your own cum off me.
She asked me if I still wanted to do it. I'm not sure what to say. I just told her we'll see how it goes this weekend.
I'm kinda worried that my friend might loose respect for me.
I can't imagine what's gong through his head.
I still can't believe he's willing to do it.
I can't believe I'm thinking about doing it.
So should I do it?

Gaunab posted:

mobby_6kl posted:

Does r/sex count because this seems like a future candidate for relationships as well:

(emphasis mine, everything else as posted)

So this guy is gonna let his best friend gently caress him in the rear end to satisfy his wife's kink apparently. There's no indication that anyone other than perhaps the friend is bi so I'm sure it'll work out great for everyone!

Ratjaculation posted:

Holy smokes.

Press charges, get restraining order and sever from poo poo family

Play posted:

I know this is a way low-hanging fruit but I have seen people in bars and clubs attempt to use these techniques and it is not only pathetic but immediately identifiable by most everyone. I personally have never seen a girl (or boy, I suppose) fall for it.

toiletbrush posted:

Maybe these days, but back when I was at uni ~15 years ago I had a friend who was crazy into PUA stuff. He was fairly good looking, but only about 5'6". It was 50/50 depressing/hilarious how you could point to pretty much any girl in a bar and he'd calmly walk up and do his routine - always the same body language, same exagerated brushing his hair, same stories, same jokes, same 'negs', loving identical every time - and nine times out of ten he'd get at least a phone number.

On the upside, it was amazing how quickly girls would lose interest once he thought he'd won them over and started being himself.

A misanthrope posted:

what is this thread about

why is it 315 pages

Professor Shark posted:

R/relationships: Respectfully listening to stories

mobby_6kl posted:

Does r/sex count because this seems like a future candidate for relationships as well:

(emphasis mine, everything else as posted)

So this guy is gonna let his best friend gently caress him in the rear end to satisfy his wife's kink apparently. There's no indication that anyone other than perhaps the friend is bi so I'm sure it'll work out great for everyone!

quote:

My bf was invited to his brothers for drinks and gaming tonight and he wants me to go to. I've only met his brother a few times at the mall and I've never met his brothers roommates or friends. He lives outside oftown and the buses shut down early tonight so we'd have to sleep over.

I told my bf he can go to his brothers tonight and I'm perfectly fine staying home alone and watching Netflix. I don't drink at all so I wouldn't be much fun and I'm uncomfortable hanging around drunk people (childhood trauma ftw), I'm also very uncomfortable around large groups or people I don't know and I'm ESPECIALLY uncomfortable sleeping at other people's apartments.

He keeps insisting I go because he wants me to meet his friends and have a good time, and while I want to meet his friends I really don't wanna meet 6-9 of them at once in a strange house I've never been to.

I reeeeeaaaally don't wanna go but I also don't wanna hurt his feelings.

Am I being a bad girlfriend? Should I suck it up and go? Is there a compromise?

Tldr: bf wants me to go drinking with his brother and his friends, I have horrible social anxiety and I dont drink so I told him to go without me but he keeps insisting I go. What do I do?

quote:

I was hanging with this girl once and she wanted to take a picture with me. I said I didn't want to because I'm ugly (I guess I have pretty low self esteem). Anyway, she said I was slightly higher than average attractiveness and that my personality made me even more attractive. Another time one of my friends said I have a beautiful smile and she agreed. And I was texting her yesterday and she said I was so cute when I was a kid (she'd been looking at pictures on my Facebook) and I said I must've gotten uglier as I got older and she was like no, you're good looking now. She's also been liking a lot of my posts on Facebook. I can't tell if she's just being nice or if she's actually interested

tl;dr: Does she like me?

toiletbrush posted:

Maybe these days, but back when I was at uni ~15 years ago I had a friend who was crazy into PUA stuff. He was fairly good looking, but only about 5'6". It was 50/50 depressing/hilarious how you could point to pretty much any girl in a bar and he'd calmly walk up and do his routine - always the same body language, same exagerated brushing his hair, same stories, same jokes, same 'negs', loving identical every time - and nine times out of ten he'd get at least a phone number.

On the upside, it was amazing how quickly girls would lose interest once he thought he'd won them over and started being himself.

Ratjaculation posted:

lmbo

go go go go ROSCOE! posted:

I'm dumber than poo poo. help me reddit!

A misanthrope posted:

one time i dated a girl who cheated on me with scott weiland. she told me he had yellow cum.

that's my only good relationship story thnk you for listening.

Mocking Bird posted:

CPS (with some exceptions for terrible mismanagement) doesn't detain children into foster care without reasonable suspicion of abuse or neglect combined with imminent risk of reoccurrence. A judge has to approve it, as well. We don't use foster care during investigations the way it's being framed, though parents who have their kids taken tell their families that all the time.

That dude should consider what about his girlfriend has CPS seriously worried she's a drug addict to the point she is neglecting her child.

Signed, a CPS social worker.

mobby_6kl posted:

Does r/sex count because this seems like a future candidate for relationships as well:

(emphasis mine, everything else as posted)

So this guy is gonna let his best friend gently caress him in the rear end to satisfy his wife's kink apparently. There's no indication that anyone other than perhaps the friend is bi so I'm sure it'll work out great for everyone!

Professor Shark posted:

Yikes, I hope you got tested