|
Sagebrush posted:i am normally in favor of just pretending the obviously fake stories are real because it's more fun, but in this case....yeaaaah like a huge MRA talking point is "male rape victims are treated worse and less seriously than female rape victims" (generally true) and this particular post sounds like an attempt to make up the most evil Counterpoint; I believe this woman exists because I met someone like her once
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 04:32
|
|
possible and get a lot of upvotes from the proud boys.
|
|
| # ? May 30, 2024 15:10 |
|
|
Barudak posted:Counterpoint; I believe this woman exists because I met someone like her once And because of how people (men and women) are treating poor Terry Crews 
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 04:39
|
|
|
AITA for last-minute telling the parents I’m supposed to babysit for that I can no longer do the job? Hey y’all. I’m pretty torn on this one. I babysat for this family one time before. 3 days ago, they asked if I could babysit on Valentines night. I said yes. Today, I got a text from the parents saying that their child got sent home from school for having a fever and vomiting. I was expecting them to cancel, but nope. I have a really important interview to do tomorrow and I have major events going on this weekend. I cannot afford to be sick for them, so I apologized profusely and told them I cannot babysit a sick child. Additionally, I work at a preschool, so I would also be risking passing the illness to 20 three year olds. AITA? EDIT: holy guacamole this post got more attention than expected. Thanks for all of your opinions. Just wanted to clear something up: sorry for the confusing title. The parents informed me about the sickness a few hours before I was supposed to show up and I texted back my cancellation minutes later. I just felt really awful about ruining their Valentine’s Day and wanted to see what y’all thought. Thanks!
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 04:40
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for last-minute telling the parents I’m supposed to babysit for that I can no longer do the job? As a parent who has had to cancel dates for this reason before, no you are not an rear end in a top hat for this, and the parents should be understanding. My usual babysitter is the grandparents, and if my kids have something I usually warn them and let them make the call. If I think it is warranted I will just cancel so as not to expose the elderly to something that could make them really sick.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 04:59
|
|
|
Sagebrush posted:i am normally in favor of just pretending the obviously fake stories are real because it's more fun, but in this case....yeaaaah like a huge MRA talking point is "male rape victims are treated worse and less seriously than female rape victims" (generally true) and this particular post sounds like an attempt to make up the most evil So, you don't believe a rape survivor?
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 05:00
|
|
|
Danaru posted:I dont really know how prenups work, but I'm scared to get one with my boyfriend because my "assets" are just massive debt. Incidentally, massive debt that I took on because my dad spent years trying to financially devastate my mother during and after the prenup-less divorce Which part is scaring you?
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 05:15
|
|
Marriage, am I right?
|
QuarkJets posted:Which part is scaring you? Basically I dont want my debt poo poo becoming a marriage asset or whatever and end up becoming his issue too if something happens to me. Again I really dont know how this works 
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 05:25
|
|
|
It might be worth talking to a lawyer about if you're that concerned about it. From what I've read pre-marriage debt usually just stays that person's debt, but a)I am absolutely not a lawyer, and b)these things have regional variations and people just usually talk about the most common way something works(which is why you talk to a lawyer who does know about any weird regional variations in the law).
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 05:29
|
|
|
Danaru posted:Basically I dont want my debt poo poo becoming a marriage asset or whatever and end up becoming his issue too if something happens to me. Again I really dont know how this works That can be spelled out explicitly in the prenup if you want. Marriage is what ties your finances together, the prenup is just an agreement describing how to untie them later if necessary. So you can spell out in the prenup that preexisting debts and assets belong to each individual (which is normal anyway) Your spouse won't receive those debts unless you both really want them to. Debts incurred together (e.g. a car loan that you each cosign on) need to be dea with somehow if you divorce, and a prenup can help with that E: I also am NAL talk to a real lawyer if you have concerns QuarkJets fucked around with this message at 06:30 on Feb 15, 2019 |
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 05:40
|
|
|
Oh rad, we were planning on getting one anyway since we're mature enough to just see it as a legal nicety but I was always worried about accidentally screwing him over somehow
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 05:42
|
|
|
Me (28F) with my husband (30M) - he never puts effort into doing things unless I ask, and is king of "I bought this for you for me."quote:Together three years, married six months. I figured we'd still be in the honeymoon phase.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 06:08
|
|
|
Haifisch posted:Me (28F) with my husband (30M) - he never puts effort into doing things unless I ask, and is king of "I bought this for you for me." I know how the thread feels about ultimatums, but come on. This poor lady needs to sit her husband on the couch (I gather he’s probably already there), take one of his hands gently between hers, look deep into his eyes, and tell him, “If you buy me one more loving football jersey, I am going to divorce you. Now get up and clean the goddamn house like you promised you would, you slug.” Otherwise, that putz is going to end up standing on the curb with all his collectible beer mugs and poo poo stacked around him blinking confusedly at the Uber driver his ex-wife has summoned to get him off her property.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 06:18
|
|
|
If she's been with him 3 years she should know how loving lazy and disinterested in doing anything he is, unless this is new married behavior and I really doubt it. Reading this thread makes it very difficult to find the will to date. I feel like I'd be ghosting people for the weirdest of things just because I'd get a Reddit flashback.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 06:24
|
|
|
empty sea posted:If she's been with him 3 years she should know how loving lazy and disinterested in doing anything he is, unless this is new married behavior and I really doubt it. Use all the skills youve learned from this thread to be the worst partner you can possibly be.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 06:28
|
|
|
Sagebrush posted:i am normally in favor of just pretending the obviously fake stories are real because it's more fun, but in this case....yeaaaah like a huge MRA talking point is "male rape victims are treated worse and less seriously than female rape victims" (generally true) and this particular post sounds like an attempt to make up the most evil This absolutely happens though. It’s ultimately still part of the patriarchy/toxic masculinity problem so there’s really no reason to treat it like it’s “just” an MRA thing.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 06:29
|
|
|
Clark Nova posted:Am I the only one who assumed the husband spread lizard poo poo on her pillow and underwear on purpose? Who could be dumb enough to put a soiled liner on their own bed accidentally? Nah I thought that too. The same way that one husband used up his wife's super expensive, asian skincare body lotion to jerk off with. Or whatever it was. Men can be garbage crybaby assholes when they don't get their way, or are upset about some junk.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 06:31
|
|
|
I tend not to jump to explanations of maliciousness when stupidity is an answer, I think dude just placed the liner there without even thinking about it because he's kind of dumb. Wife also alludes to him being dumb in a lot of other ways
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 06:37
|
|
|
christmas boots posted:This absolutely happens though. It’s ultimately still part of the patriarchy/toxic masculinity problem so there’s really no reason to treat it like it’s “just” an MRA thing. I feel like MRA types would associate male rape with being unmasculine. More specifically, they complain that male rape is taken less seriously while simultaneously taking it less seriously and perpetuating the kinds of attitudes that lead to lower reporting rates. So a story about a man with a cool exterior breaking down and crying, and then getting dumped, is not the kind of story that an MRA type would actually create, because they would have written the guy as a wuss the whole time
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 06:40
|
|
|
Power Khan posted:Happens when you take all the debuffs on character creation, just to get that AMAZING woman trait. I prefer the bitter humour of the disabled: I'm so great, God had to nerf me.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 06:43
|
|
|
empty sea posted:If she's been with him 3 years she should know how loving lazy and disinterested in doing anything he is, unless this is new married behavior and I really doubt it. OP posted:Before we got married he was much more attentive. No flowers or big gifts, but we'd generally get home after work, either make or go out for dinner and then come home to watch a show together. We'd spend that time talking and cuddling. Or he just got corrupted by the siren song of video games. OP posted:The only thing I can think of is honestly the videogames.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 06:49
|
|
|
QuarkJets posted:I feel like MRA types would associate male rape with being unmasculine. More specifically, they complain that male rape is taken less seriously while simultaneously taking it less seriously and perpetuating the kinds of attitudes that lead to lower reporting rates. So a story about a man with a cool exterior breaking down and crying, and then getting dumped, is not the kind of story that an MRA type would actually create, because they would have written the guy as a wuss the whole time you would be wrong mra's are all about look at this thing that women have a priority / advantage in.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 06:51
|
|
|
snergle posted:you would be wrong mra's are all about look at this thing that women have a priority / advantage in. Oh they absolutely are that, I even said as much. But at the same time they deny that PTSD is even a thing and are perplexed at the concept of women going years or decades keeping a brave face after a rape (they accuse her of making it up), so the guy with a cool exterior who winds up breaking down later because of past rape trauma wouldn't even exist to them. That's the detail that I identified as being the reason that an MRA person probably didn't write it; it's too realistic and doesn't align with their preconceived notions
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:03
|
|
|
Antivehicular posted:I was halfway through and going to post "bet you anything the infidelity clause was his idea," and wham, straight-up vindication. This is one of my favorite parts of my job as a bank investigator. We report stuff to the feds and treat "hiding poo poo from divorce court" on the same level as "hiding poo poo from the tax collector" but I make sure to have the branch call the spouse and ask what was up with the $300k cashier's check that got bought that morning and document everything including security camera footage, for the inevitable subpoena.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:06
|
|
|
My (29F) husband (31M) of 6 months has a secret laptop and won't tell me what he uses it for. I'm really bothered by what happened with my husband last night. This has ruined valentine's day and I don't know what to do. Last night I woke up with some stomach troubles. It was one of those random things where I felt fine once I vomited. Then I went to the kitchen to drink some water. I'd noticed he wasn't in bed when I woke up. From the kitchen I could then see he was in the living room. The light was off and he was (I think) watching a video. Couldn't tell. When I turned on the light he jumped a mile, and slammed the laptop shut. It was a PC I'd never seen before, not his macbook. Of course I asked him where that computer was from and what he was doing. My husband cannot lie to save his life, he gets very visibly anxious. He pretty much had nothing to say. He tried to say a couple things that just made no sense and it was obvious he was bullshitting, like he said he was teaching himself how to code? See I could believe he might need a PC for coding except that he's never expressed any interest in something like that before, and why then freak out when I come in the room, and why's he up at 3am in the dark doing it? Clearly bullshit. He told me to "let it go", and "it has nothing to do with me". Then refused to say anything else. He stomped off to bed and pretended to be asleep, ignoring anything I said. Eventually I gave up. Today in the morning he acted like nothing had happened. I tried to ask again and he just lightly said "oh don't worry about it." When he left for work before me, I went looking for that laptop but couldn't find it anywhere. The apartment isn't very big. I assume he probably took it with him. I brought it up for a third time when he got home and he exploded at me. He started talking about why could we not just have a nice valentine's day, he'd booked us dinner and had a surprise gift in the car and all I wanted to do was harass him, and on and on. We didn't end up going to dinner. He's been shut in our bedroom all night so far. When I knocked he said he has a migraine and needs to sleep. I don't know what to do about this. His reaction last night and today was so bizarre to me. What could require the use of another laptop? Your first thought is probably porn-- why would he need an entire separate laptop for porn? We watch it together sometimes, he knows I have no issue with it and we'll show each other things we want to try. That doesn't explain it. An affair? Looking for sex workers? Both highly unlikely (really strong 5 year relationship prior to marriage) but I admit not impossible. Secret drug or gambling addiction and this is how he hides the paper trail? I can't come up with anything else. The thing is we have shared finances and access to joint accounts/credit cards. I keep on top of all of that regularly, there is nothing out of place. If he was frittering away the amount of money needed to fund an addiction, there's no way I wouldn't have noticed. Unless it literally just began recently?? I don't even know anymore. I'm so anxious over this. And upset about messing up his valentine's day plans. I want to apologize, but I also cannot think of any not-bad explanation for the laptop. Is that just my anxiety talking? Do I need to let it go? The two things I'm specifically hoping for advice with: What could he be doing??? How should I approach him now? TL;DR: Husband refuses to tell me what he's doing on a second laptop that he kept hidden from me.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:07
|
|
|
idk I think that one's real because the woman seems like she feels kind of bad, or at least realizes that she should feel bad. I don't think MRAs would consider that. The one that I have questions about is the one written by a bartender's girlfriend, where the bartender guy told her "those drunk girls tried to drag me in the bathroom and rape me," but (one throwaway line) the GM who saw the security footage told the bartender that he was a scumbag who deserved to be fired. That is not a small discrepancy.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:11
|
|
i like nice words
|
QuarkJets posted:Oh they absolutely are that, I even said as much. But at the same time they deny that PTSD is even a thing and are perplexed at the concept of women going years or decades keeping a brave face after a rape (they accuse her of making it up), so the guy with a cool exterior who winds up breaking down later because of past rape trauma wouldn't even exist to them. That's the detail that I identified as being the reason that an MRA person probably didn't write it; it's too realistic and doesn't align with their preconceived notions you think anything matters to them besides man good woman bad? you give them to much credit. all you have to do is gender swap something that enrages them and they instantly like it.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:13
|
|
|
Anne Whateley posted:idk I think that one's real because the woman seems like she feels kind of bad, or at least realizes that she should feel bad. I don't think MRAs would consider that. I'm still curious about that one too – which is why I posted it. If it was just a simple story of him being assaulted / him assaulting it wouldn't be notable, but the fact that there was a big question makes me wonder.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:15
|
|
|
AITA for putting my neighbor's dog's poop in front of their door?quote:I watched from my balcony as my neighbor let their dog out, watched it poop in the grass, then went back inside without picking it up. I had suspected for a few weeks that the multiple huge piles of it were from this dog but now I had seen proof. So I got one of the plastic baggies (which are provided by dispensers all around our community specifically for picking up dog poop) and bagged it up and dropped it right on their doorstep. I figured this would give them the message and that I would only escalate to contacting management if it continued. What a restrained response I definitely would have done far more
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:20
|
|
|
snergle posted:you think anything matters to them besides man good woman bad? you give them to much credit. all you have to do is gender swap something that enrages them and they instantly like it. I agree, but you're not understanding my point. that's fine, let's just drop it
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:21
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:My (29F) husband (31M) of 6 months has a secret laptop and won't tell me what he uses it for. Just lol if you don’t have a burner laptop specifically for posting on these dead gay forums
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:28
|
|
|
gently caress Your Website posted:Just lol if you don’t have a burner laptop specifically for posting on these dead gay forums why buy burner laptops when burner phones would work just as well?
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:31
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:My (29F) husband (31M) of 6 months has a secret laptop and won't tell me what he uses it for. Child porn or secret family.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:46
|
|
|
QuarkJets posted:AITA for putting my neighbor's dog's poop in front of their door? I've been contemplating doing this if I could just catch the suspected neighbor in the act and exact justice accordingly. As it is I've lodged multiple complaints with management so they at least know that someone's leaving horrible massive dog dumps all over the place 
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:54
|
|
|
Another succesful (valentines) threesome Had a threesome with my boyfriend and a friend last night and then woke up to them having sex. Not sure what to do but I feel completely betrayed I promised my boyfriend that for Valentine’s Day we could have a threesome with a girl I’m friends with. We all got pretty drunk and did it, I fell asleep pretty much straight after and I woke up a couple of hours later and my boyfriend wasn’t in bed, I went to get a drink and see where they were and they were on the sofa having sex. I freaked out and started screaming at them. They said they were sorry but since they’d already had sex earlier in the night they didn’t think it would be a big deal. I told her to get out, it was like 3 in the morning and she was like I can’t i said yes you can get an Uber. I was crying and We were a.l still pretty drunk so it got really heated. My boyfriend literally held me back and told her to leave. So she got Her stuff and went. We argued and he kept apologising and I said I’m going to bed and we’ll talk in the morning. He’s still asleep. I’m feeling like I should break up with him but I don’t know. I don’t think a threesome is the same as them two having sex. He went behind my back and betrayed me and I just feel really hurt
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 07:57
|
|
|
Wait for white day and have a threesome with another man, then have more sex with him in the morning. Or be boringly adult and admit you done goofed and dump him.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 08:01
|
|
|
QuarkJets posted:I feel like MRA types would associate male rape with being unmasculine. More specifically, they complain that male rape is taken less seriously while simultaneously taking it less seriously and perpetuating the kinds of attitudes that lead to lower reporting rates. So a story about a man with a cool exterior breaking down and crying, and then getting dumped, is not the kind of story that an MRA type would actually create, because they would have written the guy as a wuss the whole time MRA types would absolutely write this story because their whole ideology is based on the idea that deep down all women are like this, and thus we need society to control their sociopathy.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 08:18
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for cutting someone out of my life because they didnt let me use their laptop for a quiz? I mean, she's not wrong that she shouldn't have to beg a friend like that, especially one she has done so much for. She might have blown up a bit melodramatically, but I can understand her freaking out that she was facing getting a zero on her quiz.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 08:24
|
|
|
QuarkJets posted:AITA for putting my neighbor's dog's poop in front of their door? the correct thing is to put it through their mail slot (no bag)
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 08:51
|
|
|
Xequecal posted:MRA types would absolutely write this story because their whole ideology is based on the idea that deep down all women are like this, and thus we need society to control their sociopathy. Again, the point is that they wrote the man in a way that they wouldn't write a man. That's the discrepancy I'm pointing out but you just seem to have breezed right past that in your rush to explain how much MRA dudes hate women (yes, we all know that, that's not being disputed, friend) And like other people pointed out they also wouldn't write the woman as feeling bad about it.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 09:20
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 30, 2024 15:10 |
|
|
The fear of spooky MRAs writing every story where a woman acts bad in this thread is ridiculous. If you think that story has to be fake then I have doubts you have ever spoken to a male rape survivor, because that sort of reaction is depressingly common and part of the reason they are afraid to talk about it. The beliefs of some broken little group of lunatics on reddit aren't relevant to the thread and bringing them up all the time is weird.
|
|
#
?
Feb 15, 2019 09:49
|
|
