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Well, sure, but going to work on 3 hours sleep is pretty garbage. The guy could work long hours, or a labour job, but any job on minimal sleep sucks. Reimburse the brother for the uber. It's kind of shocking that a 30 year old is "someone doesn't know how travel works". Good thing he had an extra 4 hours to figure it out.
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May 4, 2019 03:52
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If OP really has to get up at 5AM it's ok to say "sorry I can't pick you up," but if your brother doesn't know how to use uber or public transport or travel in general then the least you could do is talk him through it a bit and help him make arrangements not just "that's too late, sorry, figure it out."
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May 4, 2019 03:53
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for me, a lot of the issue depends on the host's sleep schedule. I would assume that if the guest touched down at 1, didn't have checked bags, the airport was close by, etc, under perfect circumstances, the host would be back in bed by 2. If he has to wake up at 5, there's a very real issues that he could be unable to go back to sleep, if he does sleep he might sleep through his alarm, if he has a long commute he could fall asleep while driving, etc.
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May 4, 2019 03:53
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The four hour delay (cheap flight with crappy layover probably) and anger about paying for 2 ubers suggests one of those annoying people that is always saving money by mooching off friends and family. That combined with refusing to even pretend to try being self sufficient would make anyone disinclined to go to work on 3 hours of sleep for a non-emergency. Edit: I really don’t understand how this type of learned helplessness is empathetic at all but I guess other people are willing to put up with it.
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May 4, 2019 03:55
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Peaceful Anarchy posted:If OP really has to get up at 5AM it's ok to say "sorry I can't pick you up," but if your brother doesn't know how to use uber or public transport or travel in general then the least you could do is talk him through it a bit and help him make arrangements not just "that's too late, sorry, figure it out." He's loving 30, he can figure it out. If he doesn't know how to download an app on a smartphone, I'm sure his wife and/or children are not complete morons and can hold his hand through the process.
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May 4, 2019 04:00
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I (25f) was invited on a trip by a group of guys (20s and 30s men) I'm friends with. Just as a friend. Two of the guys' girlfriends are upset that there's a woman going. I'm the only woman on my team at work, that's pretty par for the course in my industry. I get along well enough with the guys I work with. I've had some jobs where I was treated different, treated like poo poo, etc... This is not one of them, the guys I work with are good people. I go out with a group of them on Fridays after work for happy hour, it's always a good time and nobody I work with has ever crossed a line with me, nor I with them. It's just a chance to hang out and shoot the poo poo for a while at a bar. It's not the whole team that goes out, it's usually a smaller group of 9 guys and me. It's probably worth mentioning that I'm queer and like 95% interested in women... So like I'd consider a guy if he was somehow super super special and perfect in every way but in reality I'm far more often attracted to women. I've only dated women in my life, and I'm currently casually dating someone. And my coworkers know this, and aren't judgemental or creepy about it at all, they're pretty chill about it. So, my coworker Jeremy said that the group usually goes out for a long weekend or two at a beach house every summer. Just the group of them, out to drink and hang out and have bonfires and some hiking. And they invited me, and I said I was down to go. I started at my job under a year ago so this was the first time I heard of this. The beach trip is a week away now, and I've already picked up my share of the supplies (drinks and firewood) and I was looking forward to going. Yesterday, one of the guys, Sam, asked the group if it was cool if his girlfriend joined. And the rest of the guys said it wouldn't be the same, plus ones never came, it was always a friends trip rather than a couples trip. I didn't really have an opinion either way, but the majority of the group wanted to keep it to just friends. I said I'd be fine with just having a friends' trip, the girl I'm dating isn't too into traveling anyway. Then, today, Alex said he didn't think he could make it, he was going to stay home with his wife. Everyone was disappointed that Alex couldn't make it, and kind of annoyed he'd cancelled so late. And just an hour ago, Sam told me privately that the reason he asked about his girlfriend going is that she said she wasn't cool with being excluded after the trip turned from a 'bro' trip to mixed genders. And he said that Alex had also bowed out of the trip because his wife wasn't cool with me being there and her not being allowed. I was surprised to hear that, I had wished Sam had said that outright from the start. And I'd wished Alex had been honest too. Because then the group could have figured something out. Sam asked me if I'd stay home from the trip because he wanted to go. And that honestly hit a nerve for me, that he'd do that so backhandedly. Asking me one on one to quietly stay home rather than being upfront with the group. So I told him nah, I'd be going, it's on him to figure out poo poo with his girl, or with the group. He didn't get to decide to exclude me because he's got relationship issues. So, Sam told the whole group later that he'd be staying home. And right now, I'm in the awkward position of knowing why the trip's falling apart, and not being sure if I should spill the beans to the whole group. I know the other 5 guys going would really rather have a trip without couples, so I'm worried if I tell them everything that it'll cause conflict between them and Sam and Alex. I'm also frustrated with Sam for how he handled things and I don't know if I should tell the whole group what he asked of me. Can I have some advice? Should I talk this through with everyone or step back and let the chips fall where they may? tldr - having trouble navigating being a part of a group of guy friends.
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May 4, 2019 04:04
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Smirking_Serpent posted:for me, a lot of the issue depends on the host's sleep schedule. Yeah, a less than optimal night of sleep when family is coming to visit is obviously unacceptable for a useless sack of poo poo. It's not like normal people would adapt and somehow struggle through on less than 16 hours. Agreeing to pick them up and then saying "just figure out uber at 4 am" is just lazy.
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May 4, 2019 04:13
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mungtor posted:Yeah, a less than optimal night of sleep when family is coming to visit is obviously unacceptable for a useless sack of poo poo. It's not like normal people would adapt and somehow struggle through on less than 16 hours. Agreeing to pick them up and then saying "just figure out uber at 4 am" is just lazy. Lol the hottest of takes. The brother sounds incompetent.
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May 4, 2019 04:15
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big dyke energy posted:He's loving 30, he can figure it out. If he doesn't know how to download an app on a smartphone, I'm sure his wife and/or children are not complete morons and can hold his hand through the process. OP's not an rear end in a top hat, but they could have made everything smoother for everyone with minimal effort.
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May 4, 2019 04:15
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If it's a domestic flight, NTA. If it's international, then getting your phone working in the new country can be a pain in the rear end, and depending on airport wifi pretty difficult. But it sounds like the whole thing was in the US.
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May 4, 2019 04:17
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Peaceful Anarchy posted:Obviously he can, and did, figure it out. But he's a big whinny baby about it. I doubt this is some new occurrence so either you cut the big whinny baby out of your life, make reasonable accommodations so they have less to whine about or accept that they're going to whine. It's dumb to act surprised that he's going to be grumpy about every step of the uber experience. It’s actually really smooth. Walk out of airport with bags. Go to taxi stand. Take taxi. Done and done! Edit: lol also a taxi would have probably been cheaper since almost all taxi stands have vans so he wouldn’t have paid for two Uber’s lol.
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May 4, 2019 04:17
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Peaceful Anarchy posted:Obviously he can, and did, figure it out. But he's a big whinny baby about it. I doubt this is some new occurrence so either you cut the big whinny baby out of your life, make reasonable accommodations so they have less to whine about or accept that they're going to whine. It's dumb to act surprised that he's going to be grumpy about every step of the uber experience. What was he supposed to do, fly out and set up Uber for him? It's literally a step-by-step setup process he needs his phone to do so it's not like he could have FaceTimed in.
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May 4, 2019 04:18
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13Pandora13 posted:What was he supposed to do, fly out and set up Uber for him? It's literally a step-by-step setup process he needs his phone to do so it's not like he could have FaceTimed in. Look you don’t understand traveling as a grown adult is hard and you need to have your hand held the entire way.
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May 4, 2019 04:19
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Smirking_Serpent posted:EDIT: Most of you are confused by the black box situation. This is what I’m talking about. Excuse the dust - it’s been in the closet. That's the correct black ring box (which should be inside of the tiffany blue box) but lol, he bought that packaging off of ebay.
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May 4, 2019 04:19
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MarcusSA posted:It’s actually really smooth. Walk out of airport with bags. Go to taxi stand. Take taxi.
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May 4, 2019 04:24
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MarcusSA posted:Lol the hottest of takes. Yeah, super hot take. Do what you committed to, even when it's marginally less convenient for you. Completely unreasonable, I know.
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May 4, 2019 04:29
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MarcusSA posted:It’s actually really smooth. Walk out of airport with bags. Go to taxi stand. Take taxi. airport taxis like to mark up like crazy though. a shuttle that you reserve ahead of time can be cheaper, but i've gotten gouged before. uber i dunno but i assume it'd cost less than an airport taxi.
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May 4, 2019 04:32
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The White Dragon posted:airport taxis like to mark up like crazy though. a shuttle that you reserve ahead of time can be cheaper, but i've gotten gouged before. uber i dunno but i assume it'd cost less than an airport taxi. At this point airport taxi's are the same price as an uber/lyft + tip.
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May 4, 2019 04:34
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AITA for taking smoking breaks as a non-smoker? So I work in a fairly small office that is part of a fairly sizeable national business, not including the boss, there are about 70 employees. I am the onsite IT Support guy, and a department of one. I get an hours worth of breaks a day, half an hour paid, half an hour unpaid. It usually comes in the form of a half an hour just before noon and a half an hour mid afternoon, but I can basically take them when I want (within reason), as I am my own department. This is the same break entitlement everyone gets in the office (even the manager), yet I have noticed that at least 30 people are regular smokers/vapers, and pretty much all of them will randomly take 5 minutes or so to go and have a smoke or a puff. I thought nothing of it, assuming they were just having these little breaks cut off their overall time. But I discover that they aren't, they're taking these little five minute breaks on top of their allotted hour. And they aren't even having the time deducted from their pay. These breaks, for the most casual smoker, add up to almost an hour extra a week. For the heavier smokers, it's almost double that. I personally don't think it's fair. So, today, when there was a mass congregation of smokers taking yet another cancer break, I decided to take a 5 minute 'fresh air break', where I just stood outside in the park behind the office and read my kindle for 5 minutes, over my permitted hour. I didn't go beyond 5 minutes, and was back at my desk within that time (it isn't far). But, apparently, this was noticed. As I was taken aside by one of the sales team leaders (who actually doesn't have any authority over me) who tried to tell me off. I told her that if people (herself included) were allowed to just add on 15-20 minutes a day to their break time to smoke, I was allowed to do that for fresh air and reading. She said that it was different, I asked why. She says it's because they are addicted and having that smoke break helps them work better. I say I am addicted to food (which is true, I have weight issues much like a smoker has/will have breathing issues) but I still wait until my lunch break to eat. I don't even eat at my desk. And that the 5 minutes of escapism in my book really cleared my head for the rest of the day to come. She then sighed, and said it's not the same and told me to stop. I said she can't tell me to stop because she isn't my superior.
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May 4, 2019 04:39
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I can have some sympathy for a dude who's already having a bad start to a vacation/trip by being stuck at an airport with his wife and two kids for another 4 hours and then being told to get get bent by his brother, hissy fit about installing an app and all. Guess that makes me a horrible person though.
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May 4, 2019 04:41
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mungtor posted:Yeah, super hot take. Do what you committed to, even when it's marginally less convenient for you. Completely unreasonable, I know. Dude even had an extra four hours to figure it out!
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May 4, 2019 04:42
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Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for taking smoking breaks as a non-smoker?
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May 4, 2019 04:45
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PancakeTransmission posted:Start smoking, obviously. That's what I did in the military when smokers got free breaks and non-smokers didn't. Go full douche and get CBD eLiquids, vape yourself calm on your smoke break.
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May 4, 2019 04:49
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mungtor posted:Yeah, super hot take. Do what you committed to, even when it's marginally less convenient for you. Completely unreasonable, I know. I'm lollin at the idea of three hours of sleep being some kind of unfathomable hardship. That said oof what a burden of a sibling. Terrible
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May 4, 2019 04:50
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Motronic posted:That's the correct black ring box (which should be inside of the tiffany blue box) but lol, he bought that packaging off of ebay. Yeah, that's the part that gets me about these ring fakers. Buying a less expensive/prestigious ring is no big deal, but deliberate deception about it makes me uncomfortable. The only reason I can think of to justify it is if your partner is completely obsessed with jewelry-brand status, in which case she's going to find out anyway, because she's going to do the drat research!
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May 4, 2019 04:50
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Antivehicular posted:Yeah, that's the part that gets me about these ring fakers. Buying a less expensive/prestigious ring is no big deal, but deliberate deception about it makes me uncomfortable. The only reason I can think of to justify it is if your partner is completely obsessed with jewelry-brand status, in which case she's going to find out anyway, because she's going to do the drat research!
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May 4, 2019 04:51
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Admiral Ray posted:At this point airport taxi's are the same price as an uber/lyft + tip. Yeah I was just gonna say that. Most major airports at this point add the taxi fee onto the Uber/lyft ride. Like I said though a taxi would have been cheaper lol. Also double lol at having to explain to a grown rear end adult how to use a taxi from an airport.
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May 4, 2019 04:55
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PancakeTransmission posted:They committed to picking them up at 9pm. Not 1am. Sorry, a 30 year old with kids and a wife should be competent enough to use a taxi or Uber. You're wrong, but that's ok. 9pm vs 1am is a pain in the rear end, but if you can't deal with it you're a miserable little bitch. I got up at 4am for nearly 10 years for work, but occasionally survived a late night when events warranted.
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May 4, 2019 04:58
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AITA for not liking how my boyfriend is talking about raising his daughter? Granted, I am 23 and I don’t have any children, so what would I know? My boyfriend recently made a comment about how when his daughter is a teenager, he will never let her wear crop tops. And I asked why? He said because she is under the age of 18 and that’s not her body. It’s his. And I looked at him and I said are you serious? And he was very much serious and thought it was “annoying” of me to get upset about. Side note that I am 23 years old so I wear crop tops and just normal 23 year old poo poo that I wear. Nothing ever revealing besides a little midriff. And he will throw a FIT about it before leaving to whatever we have going on that day. He will also throw a fit if a dress is even a little bit above my knees and will refuse to go anywhere with me if I wore the dress he wasn’t “comfortable” with. Anyway. AITA? Or is my state of thinking not really justified because I’m not a parent???
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May 4, 2019 05:05
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mungtor posted:You're wrong, but that's ok. 9pm vs 1am is a pain in the rear end, but if you can't deal with it you're a miserable little bitch. I got up at 4am for nearly 10 years for work, but occasionally survived a late night when events warranted. it sounds like it wrecked your brain
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May 4, 2019 05:07
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Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for not liking how my boyfriend is talking about raising his daughter?
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May 4, 2019 05:10
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What's the over/under on the boyfriend's age? I'm gonna say 39 and bet over
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May 4, 2019 05:12
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Vim Fuego posted:What's the over/under on the boyfriend's age? I'm gonna say 39 and bet over she's posted like two other topics about him. Turns out he's... 28
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May 4, 2019 05:15
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this is another one: AITA for wanting to take a promotion my boyfriend doesn’t want me to? So long story short, I’m dating someone who has a daughter with another woman from a previous relationship. She lives in Washington state with their daughter; we live in Arizona. She had lived in Arizona but felt it was better for her to move to Washington state as that’s where she felt more comfortable. Right now, I am in a position where I could get a promotion in my job which would mean me having to live in a different area than my boyfriend. This obviously upsets him because he wants to be with me all the time but I didn’t see it as a big deal because the area isn’t that far away and we could still see each other on weekends and even sometimes during the week with the way our work schedules would be set up. He didn’t like that idea and thinks that I’m not “sacrificing” for him or “prioritizing” him like he has for me. And with that, he throws in my face that he could be living in Washington state seeing his daughter every day but chooses to stay in Arizona with me. Which I think is extremely unfair of him to say because I never asked him to do that. And I told him if he wants to live in Washington, he can. To which he responds “that’s not the point. the point is that you don’t prioritize me like i prioritize you.” Am I the rear end in a top hat here? I honestly don’t know but he sure as hell is making me feel like I am. I want this promotion because I know I’ll be happy where I’ll be but if it really is selfish of me to take then I could just stay where I’m at. And accept that I’m the rear end in a top hat.
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May 4, 2019 05:17
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tactlessbastard posted:I've spent so much time with my wife and daughters I'm literally unfit for male company being unsocialized IS male company
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May 4, 2019 05:18
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Literal Nazi Furry posted:it sounds like it wrecked your brain Yup... doing things you said you'd do, especially if it involves effort, is obviously not normal. I'm ok with that.
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May 4, 2019 05:23
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Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for not liking how my boyfriend is talking about raising his daughter? That's just about the worst possible way to word that already poor position.
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May 4, 2019 05:27
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mungtor posted:You're wrong, but that's ok. 9pm vs 1am is a pain in the rear end, but if you can't deal with it you're a miserable little bitch. I got up at 4am for nearly 10 years for work, but occasionally survived a late night when events warranted. People who disagree with you are women?
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May 4, 2019 05:32
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You said youd help me move a tv! You said it was an an LCD flatscreen, but this is a 32 inch trinto--- <both speakers are sucked into the televisions event horizon>
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May 4, 2019 05:44
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Pirate Radar posted:People who disagree with you are women? Wow. Misogynist much? I was using the non-gender specific version of "miserable little bitch", but you had to make it a thing. In this very thread there are are dozens of examples of people being bitches regardless of gender constructs. You should really think before you post. mungtor fucked around with this message at 05:48 on May 4, 2019 |
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May 4, 2019 05:46
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