Dapper_Swindler posted:

yeah. that poo poo is terrifying.

Owlofcreamcheese posted:

Wizard of oz outside of the movie is all nonstop body horror. Like the tinman isn't a robot or something, he's a guy that wanted to marry a lady but the lady's witch mom(?) put a curse on him that he needed to earn money to buy her a ring or something and he kept cutting so fast he chopped off his own legs and arms and torso and head and every time he did he would go get a replacement from the tin smith, until he was just a tin man, then someone collected up the arms and stuff and used magic meat glue to make a new man out of that corpse and the corpse of some other guy that also chopped himself up.

Dapper_Swindler posted:

lots of gilded/progressive age kids books had weird body/existentialist/weird horror elements in them.

i mean peter pan is about a dead kid who lives with pirates who kidnap a girl so she can be their mother.

was J.M. Barrie a pedo? i always got a creepy vibe around his stuff plus his whole home life. i mean he probably had arrested development and my broken cynic mind but idk.

Aesop Poprock posted:

I don’t know about Barrie but that makes me think of R. Crumb’s brother who suffered from schizophrenia and self loathing because he had some weird attraction to the kid from Treasure Island and he would just endlessly draw comics of him talking to the captain. Eventually his madness led him to this obsessive “wrinkle pattern” he’d do on the characters and everything just looks wrong even though his art style was technically very impressive. His encapsulation in the movie Crumb is one of the most disturbing portrayals of poorly treated mental illness I’ve seen

Icochet posted:

In LOTR they should've just used the eagles right away.

Cannon_Fodder posted:

I'm amazed nobody mentioned the Walrus and the Carpenter.

That's a pedo pied piper.

JebanyPedal posted:

They couldn't because it took months for Gandalf to convince them that letting men ride them was not gay.

rodbeard posted:

Ozma was a 1000 year old.

quote:

Baum was not inclined to worry about strict continuity in his series, however, and so there were discrepancies in the origins and very nature of Ozma. In her initial appearances, she was portrayed as no more than a human princess, born shortly before the Wizard's arrival in Oz. Later in the series, Baum revealed that Ozma is actually a fairy, descending from "a long line of fairy queens" as stated in The Scarecrow of Oz. In The Magic of Oz, Glinda tells Dorothy that no one knows how old Ozma really is. And in Baum's final book, Ozma herself explains that she was in fact a member of the Fairy Queen Lurline's band when Lurline enchanted Oz and turned it into a fairyland.

Jack Snow attempted to reconcile Baum's disparate accounts in The Shaggy Man of Oz, which explains that the Fairy Queen Lurline had left the infant Ozma in the care of King Pastoria, making the Princess the adopted daughter of the last King of Oz. This does not gel with the version of Ozma's story which says she is an ageless fairy who has ruled Oz for centuries.

skasion posted:

The Oz series is really bizarre tbh. Quite apart from Ozma the over 9000 years old pubescent magical girl and the grotesque poo poo like Nick Chopper, or the Shaggy Man’s secret hidden magnet which makes everyone love him even if he’s being an rear end in a top hat. Baum was obviously sick of writing it after a couple books and tried to definitively end it two or three times, and other times phoned in whole books which are basically just about characters from his other series for 95% of the book and then the end is “and then they went to Oz and Dorothy was there”.

skasion posted:

The Oz series is really bizarre tbh. Quite apart from Ozma the over 9000 years old pubescent magical girl and the grotesque poo poo like Nick Chopper, or the Shaggy Man’s secret hidden magnet which makes everyone love him even if he’s being an rear end in a top hat. Baum was obviously sick of writing it after a couple books and tried to definitively end it two or three times, and other times phoned in whole books which are basically just about characters from his other series for 95% of the book and then the end is “and then they went to Oz and Dorothy was there”.

Dapper_Swindler posted:

sounds like redwall series, the first 3 or so books are fun, but they literally become the same story over and over again. on the Oz series. i can't really blame him for burning out. like how much weird poo poo can you put into a book until it just goes all over the place.

rodbeard posted:

I loved the Oz books as a kid, but looking back at them and reading plot synopses on Wikipedia they all seem to have DeviantArt tier writing full of think veiled sexual fetishes coupled with Baum's obsession with the gold standard.

rodbeard posted:

Ozma was a 1000 year old that only looked like a child and she was created 30 years before the first anime. Lewis Carroll's hobby was taking nude photos of children which was some how a popular thing at the time. Children's literature was hosed up.

Ghost Leviathan posted:

If you think the internet is bad it seems like the whole Victorian idea of childhood was designed to give access to pedophiles

Khazar-khum posted:

Owls and pussycats do not go to sea in boats. They do not have any use for money. And above all, they do not engage in cross-species sex.

Ralph Hurley posted:

I got my daughter a copy of the poem ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas like I had when I was a kid and I discovered this new edition has completely omitted the line “the stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth, and the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.”

I can’t seem to locate the smiley of that angry fist shaking old fella, but got dangit, Santa can’t smoke a pipe anymore? I get it, smoking is bad m’kay but don’t gently caress with a two hundred year old Christmas poem, assholes. If you let Saint Nicholas into your house to give gifts to your whole family, you don’t make a big deal about him tracking chimney soot on your rug and you loving let him smoke his pipe in your living room.

And besides, chopping two whole lines off fucks up the four lines per page poetic symmetry of the thing. Relax, your kids are going to smoke because they’re sick of being told not to, not because they saw a drawing of Santa with a pipe.

Vaginal Vagrant posted:

In the jungle book, Mowgli would have died of exposure right at the start. Then he would have died like a hundred times from being eaten by wolves or whatever.

Dapper_Swindler posted:

now that just made me think of this weird nightmare of a book.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Life_and_Adventures_of_Santa_Claus

quote:

Santa Claus, as a baby, is found in the Forest of Burzee by Ak, the Master Woodsman of the World (a supreme immortal), and placed in the care of the lioness Shiegra; but thereupon adopted by the Wood Nymph, Necile.

Upon reaching young adulthood, Claus is introduced by Ak to human society, wherein he sees war, brutality, poverty, child neglect, and child abuse. Because he cannot reside in Burzee as an adult, he settles in the nearby Laughing Valley of Hohaho, where the immortals regularly assist him, and Necile gives him a little cat named Blinky.

Aesop Poprock posted:

Lmao this is the first two sentences explaining the book


What the gently caress was up with turn of the century literature around 1900 that everything possible was just vomited into book form

quote:

The Awgwas, evil beings who can turn invisible, steal the toys that Claus is giving to the children, because the toys are preventing the children from misbehaving. This leads to Claus making his journeys by night and descending through chimneys when he is unable to enter the locked doors. The Awgwas nonetheless prevent so many of Claus's deliveries that Ak declares war upon them. With the aid of Asiatic Dragons, Three-Eyed Giants of Tatary, Goozzle-Goblins, and Black Demons from Patalonia, the Awgwas believe their might superior to that of the immortals; but they and their allies are destroyed. Claus is not present for any of the battle. When it is concluded, Ak tells him simply, "The Awgwas have perished".

Aesop Poprock posted:

What the gently caress was up with turn of the century literature around 1900 that everything possible was just vomited into book form

CPL593H posted:

CPL593H posted:

flakeloaf posted:

i do not like the implication of this at all

Waltzing Along posted:

In the Sneetches when the star bellied sneetches have their stars removed because the lower class non star-bellied sneetches try to impersonate the wealthy elites.

flakeloaf posted:

what the gently caress, shel?

rodbeard posted:

I'm working graveyard shift now I might have to reread some of these books I liked as a kid. I have no idea why I was a Baum fan.

Dapper_Swindler posted:

like to an extent i miss that kinda stuff. alot of YA/kids books seem to mostly be dystopian fiction with tomboys and their harem of brooding twink men.