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Mango Polo posted:gently caress me why did I even bother for so long.  holy poo poo
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Jan 24, 2018 17:42
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I’m impressed you gave him an extra three strikes.
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Jan 24, 2018 17:45
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Mango Polo posted:I make my way home from work at around 6pm... and the fucker is standing in front of my apartment building. Tells me he'd been waiting for me for a long time because I wasn't replying. Final strike, told him to go gently caress himself and if I ever see him here again I'll break his face. Even having heard this story before, it's mindblowing to read it. Grade A creep.
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Jan 24, 2018 17:48
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That was way worse than I remember. Like I remember the stalking but not "you can play with my models" Which reminds me of a few weeks ago on the local FB page, a guy was looking for a "casual game" the standard around here is 2k for 40k, so I ask if that's okay with him but he's super insistent on it being 2500, he also offers to let me borrow his models. Which is kinda funny because I have more impulse than sense and have waaaaaaaay too many models including a poor deprived warlord sitting in pieces on my work table. The following week I decide to take him up on his offer, I had a funny but terrible idea of a bunch of Tyranid warriors, gargoyles, and broodlords I wanted to try. Never again. It took 4 hours. Dude played at a glacial pace, now while I'm used to tournament play and wasn't expecting him to match that kind of pace what I wasn't expecting was the first turn taking so long, and oh god the salt. I didn't realize how hilarious broodlords were in combat, I had an idea but daaaamn. It ended up being one of those games where I skipped things just to get it over with. Never again.
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Jan 24, 2018 17:50
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Mango Polo posted:gently caress me why did I even bother for so long. God drat son. That is totally unhinged. Hencoe posted:That was way worse than I remember. Like I remember the stalking but not "you can play with my models" Oh yeah, this is a whole other category of terrible nerd - always wants to play bigger-than-standard games and is really insistent about it, and they always seem to believe that the only reason you wouldn't want to start a 2500pt game at 8pm is because you don't own enough stuff so of course you can borrow their horribly painted garbage to make up the points! Keep the stories coming people, I'm feeling like this collective purge of nerd sins is good for us.
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Jan 24, 2018 18:06
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I beat a guy so bad once he didn’t even pack up his stuff, just walked out of the store and out of my life.
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Jan 24, 2018 18:15
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Mango Polo posted:gently caress me why did I even bother for so long.  panascope posted:I beat a guy so bad once he didn’t even pack up his stuff, just walked out of the store and out of my life.
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Jan 24, 2018 18:19
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Corrode posted:Just a constant flow of complete poo poo.
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Jan 24, 2018 18:31
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panascope posted:I beat a guy so bad once he didn’t even pack up his stuff, just walked out of the store and out of my life. Who claimed his stuff?
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Jan 24, 2018 18:33
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Jan 24, 2018 18:33
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The Sex Cannon posted:Yeah, I'm having a tough week. Been having trouble sleeping and lots of work. I'm managing to get my painting done, though! After I finish these Hellblasters, I'll take a look at what I think I can achieve and get in contact with you. That sucks, I hope things improve. I have no problem doing stuff like prepping models, assembling them, and even priming them if you need a hand.
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Jan 24, 2018 18:45
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"lol im sure mango is making this poo poo up" As if. The primarchs! quote:Fulgrim V1 And then the wild stuff quote:The EC master of the legion dude The emperor of mankind  The mother loving emperor of mankind I said  (He made this edit) And to finish. A god drat Warlord titan.  And this is just a tiny, tiny sneak peak into his collection.
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Jan 24, 2018 18:47
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gently caress it that Ferrus with Ork arms is amazing.
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Jan 24, 2018 18:50
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Angron’s been yo-yoing a turd for a half hour and there’s still no shitter in sight
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Jan 24, 2018 18:54
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I usually unironically enjoy peoples' plasticard abominations. but dear god that "Lightning".
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Jan 24, 2018 19:02
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I exhaled like I had been punched in the gut when I saw that Lightning.
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Jan 24, 2018 19:10
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I try not to be harsh on customization because it can be hard for someone with no experience building poo poo to materialize what they see in their heads So instead I'm going to say that the rough paint on Mort doesn't look too bad what with the whole 'decay and pestilence' theme he's got. Also helps that he has no skin showing (I think this guy just gave up on skintones long ago and paints from the bottle).
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Jan 24, 2018 19:13
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That Dorn model looks like when they put gray stuff on a younger actor's hair, so they can play "old". 
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Jan 24, 2018 19:15
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The paint jobs consistently leave something to be desired but there's definitely a few conversions that don't seem to be too bad. The Emperor could be decent looking with a better paint job and Dorn wasn't bad either, for instance.
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Jan 24, 2018 19:16
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I love those the same way I love MST3K movies. That Sicarian is my favorite.
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Jan 24, 2018 19:18
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Pendent posted:The paint jobs consistently leave something to be desired but there's definitely a few conversions that don't seem to be too bad. The Emperor could be decent looking with a better paint job and Dorn wasn't bad either, for instance. Dorn at least is a real model, it's the Scibor one.
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Jan 24, 2018 19:19
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Mother of god. What a lot of effort and time without mastering the very basics.
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Jan 24, 2018 19:21
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Mango Polo posted:
I see the Emperor there and all I can think of is: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EfeacZ2fuS8
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Jan 24, 2018 19:21
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Is that Lightning converted from Postman Pat's van?
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Jan 24, 2018 19:23
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Corrode posted:Terrifying
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Jan 24, 2018 19:26
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Corrode posted:Keep the stories coming people, I'm feeling like this collective purge of nerd sins is good for us. You asked for it so I'm telling. This folks is the story of "touch cloth" the model eater. Touch cloth is a loving goomba, a loving chud, a god dam anthropomorphic personification of social retardedness whom hangs around my LFG harassing gamers with his presence. He played in some big shop tournament team in the past, so he was tolerated for his skills at cards and Fantasy. If only he had any social skills. So one day, playing a 40k game with a friend, 'touch cloth' waddles in to watch. Now 'touch cloth' predictably is a gigantic man thing, tall as he is wide. Unpredictably he talks in a squeaky voice, a voice and (I poo poo you not) which sounds like the wheel chair guy out of little Britain. Anyway, so playing a good game of 40k while being observed by him, I notice my friend go white in the face. Following his gaze I observed 'touch cloth' gleefully shove a model of mine, out of my case into his mouth... In some sort of misguided joke for attention. Frankly I was stunned... (also a social tard myself at the time and I found assertive aggression hard). Thankfully my friend had no such restraint and promptly told him to spit it out and gently caress right off. Over the next year or two I had more non model run ins with 'touch cloth' (even once finally standing up and telling him to gently caress off on my own). Vindication came after coming back from a break from 40k, a break where I worked in a inner city rehab clinic and did some Bar/bouncer work. Touch cloth waddles his gravity-well over in my direction. I knew he was going to do something, he always did. As he reaches into my carry case to paw my stuff, I look the giant chud gently caress in his fat face, stare into his soul and shake my head slowly. He stops, looks down in shame and rolls swiftly away. Since then he stays away. (took me long enough to manage sadly) Foul Ole Ron fucked around with this message at 19:51 on Jan 24, 2018 |
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Jan 24, 2018 19:26
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Xarlaxas posted:I see the Emperor there and all I can think of is: TBF I'm not entirely sure that he isn't actually Teh Emps. 
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Jan 24, 2018 19:26
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Gyro Zeppeli posted:I exhaled like I had been punched in the gut when I saw that Lightning. Meanwhile I lost my poo poo at the Rapier. Oh my loving god.
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Jan 24, 2018 19:29
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Foul Ole Ron posted:"touch cloth"  This is some of the craziest poo poo I've ever heard.
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Jan 24, 2018 19:30
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Corrode posted:Dorn at least is a real model, it's the Scibor one. I was sort of wondering as there is a VERY marked increase in quality between Dorn and most of the rest of the models.
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Jan 24, 2018 19:31
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Serotonin posted:Is that Lightning converted from Postman Pat's van? Early in the morning, Just as day is dawning, He picks off all the Chaos mans in his van. Astartes Pat, Astartes Pat, Astartes Pat and his black and white views on the Emperor's policy with regard regional governorship and the role of post-humans in a future free from external threats Lovely Joe Stalin fucked around with this message at 19:36 on Jan 24, 2018 |
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Jan 24, 2018 19:33
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Ilor posted:
I gave him that name as being around him is like holding a poo poo in when you really need to dump. Eg: the phrase 'touching cloth' Foul Ole Ron fucked around with this message at 19:50 on Jan 24, 2018 |
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Jan 24, 2018 19:33
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Foul Ole Ron posted:Touch cloth guy Holy gently caress; this is horrifying. I would absolutely lose my poo poo if somebody put one of my models in their mouth 
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Jan 24, 2018 20:02
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Goons, looking for some thoughts on my Zone Mortalis list. At the moment I am looking at running with: HQ - Captain on a Bike /w Shield Eternal, and Thunderhammer - 136 Elites - 3x Primaris Aggressors /w Boltstorm Gauntlets - 111 Troops - 2x 5-Man Scouts /w Shotguns - 110 Fast Attack - 5x Primaris Inceptors /w Assault Bolters - 225 Heavy Support - 5x Primaris Hellblasters /w Plasma Incinerators - 165 A rule of thumb about ZM is that slow units that lack the ability to deepstrike are a bad choice. At the moment the Hellblasters kind of fall in that category, however the close confines of your typical ZM table means they will almost always have rapid fire. Also, here is a list of stratagems that will be available, a few of which help to mitigate problems faced by slower units. - Tunnel Access (3CP): Place 3 hatch marker 12 in apart and 6 in from a table edge. You may place up to two infantry units into reserve. Deploy both units at the end your movement phase within 6 in of a hatch and more then 9 in from an enemy unit. Roll a die for each model deployed this way, for each roll of 1 a model is removed. - Flanking Counter Assault (2CP): Place 1 infantry unit in reserve. Must be deployed at the end of your movement phase within 3 in of enemy deployment edge and more then 9¡± from an enemy model - Roll a die for each model deployed this way, for each roll of 1 a model is removed. - Can Not use both Tunnel Access & Flanking Counter Assault. - Sustained Assault (3CP): Declare you are using this stratagem before deployment. Secretly choose one of your units. When this unit is destroyed they my redeploy at the end of your next movement phase within 6 in of your table edge. Does not cost reinforcement points. Does award Kill Points if used each time it is destroyed. - Booby Traps/Sentry Guns (2CP): Use when an enemy units (Deploys, Appears, Comes on to the table, etc.) with 12¡± of one of your units. Enemy loses models on rolls of 1&2. - Barricades (1CP): Gain Three 4 in Barricaded, May be placed anywhere on the tables. (Players musts provide their own barricades) - Reactive Fire (1CP): Select a unit firing overwatch, that over watch is resolved at full ballistic skill for Pistol, rapid fire, and assault weapons. TheArmorOfContempt fucked around with this message at 21:02 on Jan 24, 2018 |
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Jan 24, 2018 20:55
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Foul Ole Ron posted:The tale of Touch Cloth the Vile I've had that happen before as well. Thing is, this dude was pretty much the anti-chud. Decent looking, generally fun to be around, basic self-grooming but he just did not know when to let a joke die. So I'm playing a game with someone else and he comes over to watch, we're meant to go grab a bite to eat after this match and he's cracking jokes about eating the terrain and all that if it takes much longer. Out of the corner of my eye I notice him pick up dead models and slowly draw them towards his mouth, funny at first but it starts getting tiresome quick when he starts doing it to models still in game. Eventually I tell him seriously to knock it off, at which point he snatches up a dude and pops it into his mouth. Naturally at this point we're telling him to gently caress off with that gross poo poo, but the fucker decides to go a step beyond and bites down, soft enough to not smash the model, but hard enough to break off a weapon, which he swallows and immediately starts choking on. Needless to say I didn't speak to him for months, or use that poor Marine ever again.
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Jan 24, 2018 20:57
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SteelMentor posted:
On closer inspection...I am cool with my gaming issues. You guys have fun...
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Jan 24, 2018 21:04
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Lovely Joe Stalin posted:Early in the morning, Bravo
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Jan 24, 2018 21:23
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You should have pinched his nose and held his mouth shut so he had to eat the whole marine.
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Jan 24, 2018 21:45
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Bloody hell this escalated quickly.
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Jan 24, 2018 21:47
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are warhams the new tide pods or something
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Jan 24, 2018 21:51
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