alnilam posted:

3. Author's research, conducted 1997.

Stoner Sloth posted:

i wonder if people can use original character pokemons (do not steal)?

tutankhalmond posted:

riddles know no bounds. questions beyond time and space and first gen even

Non Krampus Mentis posted:

oh it’s on now, motherfuckers

Heather Papps posted:

psyduck is really good

Heather Papps posted:

no jokes i'm kind of reconsidering my position.

alnilam posted:

I find many of these arguments to be leek-y and farfetch'd.

google THIS posted:

Pikachu (Pokémon Red, 1996) (Pokémon Blue, 1996) (Pokémon Yellow, 1998)

Those were the only primary sources I could find; Pokémon Orange, Green, and Purple are all secondary sources

Sherbert Hoover posted:

Pikachu is the best pokemon. He is yellow,¹ very powerful,² and a loyal friend.³






-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
<sub>1. Sherbert Hoover, Pikachu, 1998, colored pencil, 8.5 by 11 in., private collection, New Braunfels, Texas.
2. Ibid.
3. “Pikachu's Goodbye,” Pokémon: Indigo League, Season 1, Episode 39 (Tokyo: TV Tokyo, April 16, 1998).</sub>

alnilam posted:

Moltres is one of the legendary bird Pokémon.¹ When Moltres flaps its flaming wings, they glimmer with a dazzling red glow.² Properly trained, Moltres can also beat all of the Elite 5 Pokemon.³

-------------------------------------------------------------
1. Pokedex, 1st ed. Pg 146. Game Freak Press, Tokyo, Japan. (1996)
2. Ibid.
3. Author's research, conducted 1997.

Heather Papps posted:

Typhlosion (Japanese: バクフーン Bakphoon) is a Fire-type Pokémon introduced in Generation II.

It evolves from Quilava starting at level 36. It is the final form of Cyndaquil.

In Hisui, Typhlosion has a dual-type Fire/Ghost regional form. It evolves from Quilava starting at level 36. It is the final form of Cyndaquil in the Hisui region.

In this essay i will outline exactly why the hisui form is terrible. typhlosion is maybe my favourite sugimori pokemon design, for personal reasons, also to be outlined.

my first pokemon game was yellow, when my dad's friend won a gameboy colour special pikachu edition with a copy of pokemon yellow as a prize in a golf tournament. having no children, he bequeathed it to my father, who gave it to me. i loved that game, but when pokemon gold and silver were announced i knew that things were gonna change. i had not played yellow when everyone else was playing red and green - but i was ready, trained and hardened for the battle that was to come.

on November 21, 1999, i was driven to a walmart, where i had used my own money to place a pre-order. it was time. i picked the fire type starter because i am a reformed pyromaniac. we adventured through the world, together, defeated the elite 4, and then the kanto gyms, and eventually red, together. i knicknamed him elvis, and his children were all elvis themed names, for some reason. my grandmother really likes elvis. i transferred him from game to game all the way to pokemon x, where i was finally able to hand feed and pat his head. this is all to say i loved my fire weasel very much.

flash forward to today, where i discover that there's a new form - not a single fire type, but fire and ghost type. i was overjoyed, excited, delighted. untill i scrolled down, and found this image:
¹

this is not my friend.

this is my friend.
²

we had adventures together for more than a decade. i loved elvis like a son³ and am livid that they did my boy like this. not only is typhlosion the best pokemon, but their alternate form is the WORST⁴ pokemon

~~~~~~~
1-https://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/File:157Typhlosion-Hisui.png
2- https://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/File:Spr_4h_157.png
3- my own research, see heather papps et-all this post
4- revealed to me in a dream

Non Krampus Mentis posted:

Why Psyduck is the Best Pokémon, by Non Krampus Mentis

Through the many generations of Pokémon, there have been dozens of stand-outs and fan favorites. However, today I submit to you, the good people of BYOB, that there is in fact a superior Pokémon, and it is Psyduck.

Why, you may ask, is Psyduck the best? Raw power? Animal instinct? Killer moves? I submit to you that, in defiance of metagaming logic and the mechanics of the game, the appeal of Psyduck has nothing to do with its utility in battle: more than any other Pokémon, Psyduck is Just A Little Guy, and that is what makes them stand out.

Let’s look at the facts.

Fact 1: Psyduck is cute.
Look at that little guy. Just a soft little blob with quirky features—a bill, webbed feet, paw-hands, a crest that might be fur or feathers, and that big-eyed stare. The now-obscure word fubsy applies handily to Psyduck, with its squat physique and round shapes. Not to mention in Detective Pikachu (Letterman et al, 2019), the CGI Psyduck was given a truly incredible texture: feathers that evoke the midpoint between a fuzzy baby chick and an adult bird. Imagine the downy softness of a chick but also the smoothness of grown feathers, all in a bright, friendly sunshine yellow. That’s an eminently huggable creature.

Fact 2: Psyduck is relatable.
Perhaps appropriately in a setting where many types of animals can be shrunk down into Pokeballs and hurled at one another at a moment’s notice, Psyduck looks perpetually overwhelmed. That vacant stare evokes a feeling all too familiar in a post-2020 world: a sense of having forgotten something terribly important at the worst possible time to do so. We are told by the Pokédex in multiple games (among them Moon, Shield, and Yellow) that Psyduck’s powers are linked to chronic headaches and stress, and that it rarely remembers using its powers once the headache subsides. Who among us has not, in a moment of supreme frustration, found an unexpected reservoir of strength, and later recalled the event through a somewhat fuzzy filter?

In a world where anxiety abounds, Psyduck reassures us that we are not alone in feeling overwhelmed—and provides a necessary reminder that we are capable of more than we think, despite our limitations.

Fact 3: Psyduck is funny.
Again, I implore: look at that face. That expression that ranges from “what the gently caress?” to “the gently caress you just say to me?” to “oh Jesus oh god gently caress me running”. Not to mention their body shape means their gait is all waddly and bouncy. That poo poo is hilarious. Who needs powerful moves or stats when you’ve got the power to make everyone around you laugh?

Fact 4: Psyduck is a smilie.


I hope you have enjoyed my report on Psyduck as much as I enjoyed writing it.

more falafel please posted:

For centuries, orbkind has pondered which pokemon is the best pokemon. Of course, one must only look to the classic French philosophy text Équipage Saccagé¹ to learn that it is, in fact, Slowpoke. Each of his legs has a single White Claw²: coincidence? Unlikely.

~~~
1. https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3932939
2. https://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Slowpoke_(Pok%C3%A9mon)#Biology

Bacon Taco posted:

I'd like a tall pumpkin spice latte with oatmilk and vanilla powder, and a grande hazelnut mocha frappucino in a venti cup with an extra 3 pumps, and when they are both done pour the pumpkin spice latte into the frappucino cup.

Wait, I'm not done. Then get a cup bigger than the venti (I know you have one back there, Brad) and fill it with light ice, then pour the latte/frappucino mix over that ice. Then say three hail satans and three hail marys and pass it over to me.

ChubbyChecker posted:

virgin irish coffee on the rocks, neat

Heather Papps posted:

i'll take a blended african roast americano, cream instead of milk, milk instead of coffee, coffee instead of milk, extra foam, double whip, shot of hazlenut but also a single actual hazlenut in there AND you have to spell my name right.

Sherbert Hoover posted:

exasperated barista voice: John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt? John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt?

Khanstant posted:

coffee from offbrand chinese mr coffee machine, unknown preground beans, left to age unheated for 2 days, and a special little guy sucks out all the parts that taste like nyquil

more falafel please posted:

can I get a pour-under, a pour-between, and a pour-beside, for there

Sherbert Hoover posted:

Sherbert Hoover posted:

Sherbert Hoover posted:

alnilam posted:

Great jorb

Sherbert Hoover posted:

more falafel please posted:

it's tutankalmond's court jester

Chewbecca posted:

Non Krampus Mentis posted:

Behold, O boy king: I bring you a star map of heretofore uncharted constellations!



Let me explain.

Top right (linked by a pink line), The Whip. Often described as “rad as hell” and “probably not celestial Morse code”.

Middle right (linked by a dark green line), The Shrug. No one knows where this one was first observed, and no one seems to care.

Bottom right (linked by a red line), The Questing Beast. Don’t try to navigate by this one. Or do. I can’t tell you what to do with your life.

Bottom left (linked by a blue line), William Castle’s The Tingler. Among the stars, no one can hear you scream.

And finally, top left (linked by a pale blue line), The Polite But Emphatic “No, Thank You”.

Sherbert Hoover posted:

Pikachu is the best pokemon. He is yellow,¹ very powerful,² and a loyal friend.³






-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
<sub>1. Sherbert Hoover, Pikachu, 1998, colored pencil, 8.5 by 11 in., private collection, New Braunfels, Texas.
2. Ibid.
3. “Pikachu's Goodbye,” Pokémon: Indigo League, Season 1, Episode 39 (Tokyo: TV Tokyo, April 16, 1998).</sub>

google THIS posted:

Pikachu (Pokémon Red, 1996) (Pokémon Blue, 1996) (Pokémon Yellow, 1998)

Those were the only primary sources I could find; Pokémon Orange, Green, and Purple are all secondary sources

ChubbyChecker posted:

e: noooo! i missed the deadline

tutankhalmond posted:

the judges (Time Eternal and Space Infinite) says it still counts