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theHUNGERian posted:Over the holiday break, I finally decided to turn off the stupid texting app I was peer pressured into installing by my coworkers a few years ago. I figured it would raise some eyebrows eventually, but I didn't know when. The answer is two weeks. Yesterday I got a regular text from my manager asking if I was ok (because he hadn't heard a peep in our stupid texting app), and I promptly replied that I was fine, I merely turned off the stupid texting app. Mrs. Bastard and the other parents involved in coordinating kids sports and activities all used groupme which I resisted for months until I started missing poo poo because it was only discussed on groupme. I finally installed it and within one day got sent inline pornography from a bot.
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Jan 1, 2021 16:30
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Just got this mass text from the mothership
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Jan 4, 2021 03:18
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Che Delilas posted:"Contact HR" sounds a lot like "tell us to begin generating a paper trail to lay you off for an unrelated reason" to me. I just enjoyed the one option menu aspect
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Jan 4, 2021 03:57
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Outrail posted:There's a massive difference between dysfunctional and non-viable. It's vastly improved since I started working here and things are moving in the right direction. I like fixing things, this place isn't irredeemable and if I can get it functioning it'll look really good on my resume in a few years. I was thinking the same way at my last job and worked a whole lot for a very long time to get it just right and then the owner fired me so he could give it to his son.
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Jan 23, 2021 04:20
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I'm sitting through an extremely tedious training program this evening and the phrase 'not as precise, but equally accurate' just got dropped with a straight face.
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Feb 3, 2021 04:39
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Space Gopher posted:What's wrong with this? Yes but this was in the context of employee reviews.
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Feb 3, 2021 04:56
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Before I arrived here last July, it was discovered that different supervisors had been enforcing laxer attendance policies than company standard for favorites via loving around with timecards in Kronos prior to approval. This was obviously Bad. Do you think the company coached and or disciplined this behavior out of the supervisors as needed OR did they just assign global responsibility for all timecards to the one supervisor who wasn't playing games, thereby quintupling the amount of time he spends on payroll to the point he's seriously burned out?
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Mar 9, 2021 19:16
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Tibalt posted:I wouldn't be able to resist the temptation to jam so many cliches into that exit email. "In light of the ngoing situation, management and I have mutually decided, for health reasons, that I'll focus on spending more time with my wife and family." ...in these trying times
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Apr 27, 2021 17:20
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My boss dropped by Friday afternoon and suggested I apply for this analytical position that has been created under him (I'm in operations). I guess I don't really have a choice, huh.
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May 2, 2021 02:45
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theHUNGERian posted:God bless my boss' soul for working around red tape and getting me a resource I had requested. But how the gently caress am I going to interact with someone who works 9pm-5am when I work 7:30am-4pm? In my long time experience as a night guy, don't worry, they'll make him come in early. tactlessbastard fucked around with this message at 15:32 on May 2, 2021 |
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May 2, 2021 15:17
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Dango Bango posted:This is essentially a typical day for leadership in my org I see my boss on average about 4 minutes a day as he goes from meeting to meeting
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May 22, 2021 09:45
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My daytime counterpart has been voluntold to attend a multinational teams meeting about company morale that will be at 2am local time.
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May 23, 2021 05:04
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Thanatosian posted:Best team-building exercise: everyone is called into a meeting first thing in the morning. There, salary increases are announced, and everyone is given the rest of the day off. Our CEO visited and heaped piles of praise on our facility for how we carried the whole international company on our back during these unprecedented times and that thanks weren't enough and he wanted to put his money where his mouth was...and announced a new initiative which is going to require a poo poo load of extra work.
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Jun 2, 2021 17:21
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FAUXTON posted:lmao 'W'FH
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Jun 14, 2021 19:34
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We had a 1hr meeting on morale Monday between my 3 peers, our new boss and HR that quickly deteriorated into a 2.5 hour airing of grievances that I largely stayed out of. One of the things that was brought up is that we are having way too many meetings about work causing us to work late to get the actual work done (this impacts the day crew guys more than me, my beef is to always have to come in early for meetings to accommodate the 9 to 5 office crew who wants the meetings at convenient times for them). Anyway long story short HR wants us to set up a series of meetings with our direct reports, each other, and our boss as a group and with our boss one on one to get to the bottom of why morale is so bad. Sigh.
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Jun 16, 2021 08:14
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Jun 18, 2021 09:17
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Beefeater1980 posted:It’s a shame we got a good title recently because this is a winner. They always seem to come in bunches, hah
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Jun 21, 2021 16:31
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Tnuctip posted:It doesn’t really matter anyway because production already started with out of date instructions and prints. Ops dude just said gently caress it flipped me off and said he’s got a job to do. tactlessbastard posted:Myself, last Monday:
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Jun 22, 2021 17:43
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Keyser_Soze posted:what consulting firm dipshits taught the dipshits at my mega-huge-evil healthcare organization to now always say "THE ASK" as opposed to "the requirement" like it's some cutting edge term? Ugh work made me take an Accenture course and the one thing I learned from it is why everyone here talks in complete gibberish.
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Aug 10, 2021 06:01
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priznat posted:Myself and several coworkers are waiting on a company that is staffing up a new site to send us out offers and holy crap it seems like HR can just not get it done. There are 4 of us and we’ve been waiting upwards of a week and a half, with the directors getting involved to tell HR get it done while pleading with us to please have patience. It’s pretty crazy poo poo. We do have other offers for different locations so might get pulled apart if they can’t dislodge their thumb from their butt. But it would be great to continue working together. I was subjected to 4 hours of training this week centered around this series of videos about how a manager is absolutely running a department into the ground by Manager plays favorites, lets the team bully one guy for having an accent, another guy for being older, texts constantly during meetings, etc. Anyway in the end someone from HR comes in and tells her to talk to her employees and everyone walks away smiling and the manager, on the verge of tears, thanks the HR person for saving her. Anyway I'm long beaten to the joke about fantasy and orcs.
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Oct 28, 2021 17:26
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Cast_No_Shadow posted:Does the thread have any advice on what to talk about in initial calls with recruiters? I've spent the last decade with the same company and have stalled out progression here. The biggest thing to keep in mind is that they lie like dogs.
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Oct 30, 2021 23:29
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skipdogg posted:Survey chat reminds me of a few years ago when the sent out the 100% totally anonymous (for real we won't retaliate at all we promise) employee survey, and then the first 2 questions were 1) What office do you work in and 2) what department are you in. I closed the window after that, I was the only IT employee in our office location, no way I was filling that out. Ours wanted to know your department, your age, and your date of hire.
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Nov 27, 2021 13:50
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Volmarias posted:I think I found your problem chief. My company fired everyone who couldn't prove to be vaccinated last year and now we're having another huge outbreak.
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Jan 15, 2022 04:32
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Every week for going on two years now Workday emails me that I have an uncompleted task. That task is to finish the Workday tutorial I did on my first day of employment. The last page of the Workday tutorial is a broken link.
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Feb 15, 2022 18:45
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I went to elementary school with a guy who tried to kill his own father via car bomb. He's back out of prison now and around town and it's awkward.
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Mar 6, 2022 16:04
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D34THROW posted:leave my fuckin swingline alone or i'll burn the building down My stapler vanished the last time I took a day of PTO 
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Jun 2, 2022 19:34
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knox_harrington posted:An uplifting poster in the coffee room My dad has pancreatic cancer 
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Jun 30, 2022 17:30
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tactlessbastard posted:My dad has pancreatic cancer I got a 'needs improvement' yearly review that essentially boiled down to 'in the last quarter tactlessbastard is letting his personal life interfere with his work' lol 
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Jul 21, 2022 04:23
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Fil5000 posted:, but I'm 42 years old and know how my brain works, You heard the man!
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Aug 10, 2022 14:07
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I first saw the twitter main character today around noon and by the time I followed up she had already been run off the internet and I had a good chuckle. Little miss ‘I want more WFH monitoring because my peers are lazy’
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Aug 18, 2022 05:10
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My boss has completely checked out, which, ok, good for you, bro, but he's no longer functioning as a buffer between us and the horrible screaming maw that is the office clique 
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Sep 1, 2022 09:58
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Democratic Pirate posted:My calendar: I am in a meeting till 10:30 This is all bad but the voicemail is a war crime
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Sep 14, 2022 16:39
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HR needed me to get a scan of my newest employee’s I9 which is how I learned that he was three months old on never forget 
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Sep 14, 2022 23:12
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remigious posted:I stupidly mentioned raises in relation to inflation to my boss yesterday and she said that raises caused all of the inflation and this has to stop somewhere Someone asked that at the annual financial meeting and the HR drone said gosh, if we gave you more money when inflation went up, we'd also have to reduce your salary when inflation goes down, and nobody would like that, would they?
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Sep 23, 2022 16:59
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My daytime counterpart has been in his position for 14 years. Every time our boss leaves, due to transfer or termination or whatever, he applies for that position. They interview him, have him work as acting boss for a few months, and then ultimately hire a new boss, who he then has to train. This has happened 12 times
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Oct 7, 2022 19:50
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Lockback posted:Don't tell someone they can leave early and then throw them under the (early) bus when it's caught. I'd rather get chewed out and sleep well knowing I did the right thing, personally. No kidding, I’d fight that tooth and nail, and then escalate against the complainer for wasting company time.
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Oct 15, 2022 02:44
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Slaughtering sex pests Is easy, the hard part is trying to get more than one
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Nov 21, 2022 05:12
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SerthVarnee posted:Question: Sorority
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Dec 5, 2022 17:16
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tactlessbastard posted:My dad has pancreatic cancer It's back with a vengeance (bigger than pre surgery) and he probably won't make it to 2023
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Dec 12, 2022 02:16
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Thanks all, I realize this isn't exactly the correct forum for this. Fortunately I only work this week and then I'm off for the rest of the year.
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Dec 12, 2022 16:26
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