Geeky Star Wars Loser Thread Episode VII: Attack of the bugnest orgies

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > The Book Barn > Geeky Star Wars Loser Thread Episode VII: Attack of the bugnest orgies

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Tumblr of scotch: Mar 13, 2006; Please, don't be my neighbor.

Kneel Before Zog posted:

Is A New Hope a good read?

The movie novelizations are actually some of the few books I haven't read, which is why I'm not quite sure which character gave the explanation; I'm just going based off a quote from someone else. If they're anything like the radio dramas, though, then they're probably quite good.

# ¿ Oct 13, 2011 02:42

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# ¿ May 16, 2024 22:59

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CobiWann posted:

Hell, I've been saying "Twigh-lek" for years, but "The Old Republic" says it's "Twee-lek."

I wouldn't worry too much about it. Both pronunciations are used in a myriad of sources. I'm pretty sure KotOR itself had both, in fact.

# ¿ Oct 13, 2011 14:47

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BonHair posted:

Speaking of ages: I was doing a Star Wars marathon with my linguist buddies the other day, and we came up with a great explanation for Yodas strange word order: He's like 900 years old, and during his lifetime, the language must have changed considerably. So basically, Yoda is just speaking with "Old Basic" syntax, but using modern words (Because he wants people to understand him?)

From an ultra-technical standpoint, there's actually nothing incorrect about the way he speaks, it just sounds awkward to us because it's not how we're used to it. English/Basic rules allow it, though; for example, "He said he'd take me to him, and take me to him he did," and, "I said I'd take you to him, and now take you to him I will," are both completely linguistically-appropriate all the way through. All Yoda does is overuse them. He's like that pretentious kid everyone knew in middle school, only he never grew out of it.

Alternate theory: Dude's 900 years old, he's probably going senile.

# ¿ Oct 13, 2011 16:22

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Buml0r posted:

I need help identifying a tune that popped into my head. I THINK it's from OT Star Wars.

Here I am playing it on the worst keyboard they ever made:

http://tinyurl.com/6h3f5an

I'm sure somewhere between my distant memory and working out how to actually play it, it will have ended up a bit wrong, but if it's from Star Wars then I'm sure someone here will at least recognise what it was before I got it wrong. The bit I most think is right is what happens immediately after the first two rising notes, really.

Here you go. Starting at about 2:28.

# ¿ Oct 17, 2011 19:01

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ImpAtom posted:

Accepting the EU means that you're at least somewhat obligated to stick with the EU, even if it would involve altering your story. Simply ignoring it gives the show writers more freedom to do what they want instead of needing to be familiar with a bunch of extracanon stuff.

But the existence of Ryloth itself is from the EU.

# ¿ Dec 27, 2011 06:34

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computer parts posted:

If you mean them using the name itself it was probably "eh this name sounds sci-fi ish and isn't absurdly retarded like Teh Roxxor so let's just call it a day."

I mean Ryloth in general. The name of it, it being the twi'lek homeworld, its crazy weather (which they kept and just didn't bother to keep an explanation for), the planet being fairly inhospitable, all of that. They basically kept it exactly like it is in the EU, minus the tidal locking and the living primarily underground. It's pretty clear that they actually did know poo poo about it, they just... chose not to keep it, or something.

# ¿ Dec 27, 2011 08:41

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Hondo82 posted:

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

(Yes the special features are really good. But, still. Noooooooooooooooooo )

Honestly, while that's unforgivable, it's not nearly as bad as I was expecting. I was expecting the full 5-second wail.

# ¿ Jan 7, 2012 18:01

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TOOT BOOT posted:

Didn't they turn Luke into a new Emperor at one point?

No, just the new right hand man for the Emperor's clone.

I wish I were joking.

# ¿ Jan 9, 2012 01:02

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LLJKSiLk posted:

I sort of enjoyed the books about Corellia wanting to be independent and the hypocrisy of the New Republic trying to force them to stay.

Two things.

One: It's more accurate to describe it as Corellia wanted all the benefits of being in the Republic without any of the responsibilities.

Two: Those books were even worse than the bug orgies that preceded them.

# ¿ Jan 10, 2012 00:28

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Jigoku San posted:

I don't really buy the Ewok = merchandising thing. I mean as a kid I didn't like the Ewoks because they where boring teddy bears with soulless eyes (now with new soulless CG eyes!), I would have actually wanted a stuffed Wookiee.

I think its more likely that the same cash got about 3 Ewok costumes for every Wookiee costume.

Ewoks came from the same place Jawas and Ugnaughts and Yoda and Willow came from.

George Lucas' love of midgets.

# ¿ Jan 10, 2012 04:09

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Crowetron posted:

If they cast Donald Faison as young Lando, I will watch every goddamn episode.

I could see Dul� Hill in the role if Psych ends (please no :ohdear:

) before the SW series starts.

# ¿ Jan 10, 2012 21:49

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Cheapsteaks posted:

You could probably start naming Darth's after metal bands and it would work well too.

Darth Megadeth? Darth Metallica? Darth Evile?

I could support Darth Savatage 110%.

# ¿ Jan 13, 2012 05:16

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Timby posted:

I think some books or other sources in the early '90s gave his first name as Cos.

That was from the early drafts of Star Wars, when Lucas had his full name as Cos Dashit.

# ¿ Jan 14, 2012 21:59

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VaultAggie posted:

I thought you were making this up so I had to look it up. It's actually true.

If you think the prequels were bad, you should never, ever look at the early drafts of ANH. If it had gone to theatres in that state, it could well have been the biggest bomb since Plan 9 from Outer Space. Marcia Lucas, George's now-ex wife, is the biggest reason we got what we did (that, and people would actually say "no" to him back then).

Among other things that she or others convinced him to leave on the cutting room floor:
� Chewbacca (maybe Han? I know it was one or the other, but I'm about 60% sure it was Chewie) looked like this.
� Almost all of the main characters were originally planned to be midgets.
� Lightsabres were normal infantry weapons instead of special Jedi-only swords (note also the riot shields).
� The Emperor's throne room was a lava cave.

I used to have a 1994 SW soundtrack set that came with a booklet of a lot more early-stage concept art that George had Ralph McQuarrie do. Lost to too many house moves at this point.

# ¿ Jan 14, 2012 23:33

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BigRed0427 posted:

Wait, they finished that? I thought it fell apart from community drama after a few years.

There were two groups doing the same sort of project. Team Gizka exploded in a hilarious dramabomb, but the other team did fine.

# ¿ Jan 15, 2012 04:20

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WhyteRyce posted:

The clone numbers wouldn't have been so bad if all the clones were treated as elite commando and infiltration units and the vast, vast, vast, vast bulk of the fighting was done by everyday ordinary citizens and militia. But the movies and shows did a really bad job of it.

Isn't that how the EU explains it as long as you ignore KT's drivel? I've never really been interested in that era aside from Coruscant Nights, so I don't know for sure.

# ¿ Jan 23, 2012 06:01

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Esroc posted:

It's just for a card game. I wouldn't put too much stake in it actually holding up as canon. The card games have often taken liberties with canon.

EDIT: Besides, he looks kinda badass.

No lie, he looks kind of horrifying. I would not cross that dude even without the lightsabre. If all gungans had been like that, the prequels would have been saved (or at least significantly closer to it).

# ¿ Jan 26, 2012 10:59

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A long time ago, in a ~~galaxy~~ thread far, far away, somebody once posted a colossal rundown on why Karen Traviss is one of the biggest hacks in all of Star Wars. Does anyone happen to have it on hand? I want to show it to a few friends who've only seen the tip of the iceberg and are jonesing for more.

# ¿ Mar 29, 2012 03:27

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SeanBeansShako posted:

Anyone else hoping this 1313 may be that original trilogy open world RPG some of us have been pining for?

I mean, I know the chances are happening are slim but...

Hoping? Yes. Expecting? No. Why? Lucas.

# ¿ Jun 4, 2012 21:48

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Metal Loaf posted:

Speaking of Star Wars games, did anybody ever play the Jango Fett game, Bounty Hunter? I was clearing out some stuff earlier and I found the old Prima strategy guide for it. While it's been years since I played it (or any other computer game, for that matter) I seem to recall it was reasonably good.

I played it and found the controls to be ridiculously clunky, but other people's opinions are more favourable.

AcidRonin posted:

Anybody else have good experience with the audio books in the EU?

I've discovered that the comics in particular have good audio adaptations. I've only listened to a few, but they all had multiple voice actors and no narrator^*, relying on dialogue and sound effects to actually tell the story.

^{*except for the opening crawl and occasionally an epilogue}

# ¿ Jun 5, 2012 23:20

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SirPhoebos posted:

So, I've been thinking: I know that Karen Traviss gets a lot of hate on this thread, and from what evidence I've seen it seems to be justified. However, one point that I think was attributed to her unfairly is the whole "3 Million Clonetroopers."

The reason that I say it's not fair is that number is reasonable given what we are told by the G-canon.

In Ep.2 when Obi-wan meets the Kamino-ese (sp?) they tell him that 200,000 troops are ready and a million will soon be ready. At the end, whatshername tells Obi-wan that if he needs more troops, it will take more time to create them.

So assuming Kamino took a year for development, that's 9 years to create 1.2 million troops. The Clone Wars lasted 3 years. So to even just hit the 3-million mark, Kamino would need to simultaneously increase production output by 50% AND cut production time by 200%.

TL;DR: 3 million troops is a way-too-low figure, but that's more George's fault than Karen. Also,

I haven't seen Ep2 in a couple years, but don't they say a million more units well on the way, not a million more troops? They don't specify how many a unit is. It could be an individual trooper, or a squad, or a platoon.
( :goonsay:

)

# ¿ Jun 9, 2012 18:37

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Epi Lepi posted:

I mean the whole war was stupid as hell anyway. What's the point of two proxy armies fighting each other? They might as well just have a football game to settle it.

Keep in mind, the same person�Sidious�was behind both sides, and had the ultimate goal of control of the galaxy. It's natural that he'd want to have the most effective army possible, so he used the war to determine whether one of primarily droids or one of primarily clones worked better.

# ¿ Jun 12, 2012 22:39

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Metal Loaf posted:

Isn't Jaina Solo meant to be about forty years old by the end of FOTJ as well? I've not read the series but I did read LOTF and both Jaina and Jacen Solo kind of came across as though they were still being written as teenagers in that series.

And therein lies why I've largely given up on Star Wars books. I know a lot of people hated it, but I thought the NJO was great aside from a few filler books that really added nothing. It had real character development, actual emotional growth, etc... and then the very next series, we get Bug Orgies, and everyone, old and new generation alike, reverts to the mental age of 15 for the next two dozen books.

# ¿ Jul 21, 2012 21:59

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arioch posted:

Abeloth, bug-loving, Jacen-with-Sith-bullshit-yellow-eyes, Anakin dying, Anakin-the-Centerpoint-station, bug-loving, Ta'a Chume-aneurysm-bathtub-with-Jacen-and-Ben-watching, bug-loving, toss in random Karen Traviss Mandalorian poo poo everywhere too and we'll have StarWars2010.jpg

From what I'm told, the Anakin thing was actually on orders from Lucas. Apparently he thinks the readers are as dumb as he is and that they'd get "confused" by having both Anakin Solo and Anakin Skywalker.

Tumblr of scotch fucked around with this message at 22:42 on Jul 25, 2012

# ¿ Jul 25, 2012 22:08

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Jedi Knight Luigi posted:

This is the second time I've said this itt:

Are you motherfucking kidding me??

The last NJO book has a big interview with a few of the writers and editorial staff at the end of it. They mention it in there. I'll see if I can find my books and the passage in question.

# ¿ Jul 26, 2012 03:40

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Arbite posted:

Uh... what?

If I'm remembering right, she tried to seduce Ben, who was at the time... I want to say about 15?

e: And she's also like 13 years older than him, too. Almost twice his age at the time.

Tumblr of scotch fucked around with this message at 09:24 on Jul 26, 2012

# ¿ Jul 26, 2012 09:16

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Jedi Knight Luigi posted:

When I was a wee lad I couldn't pass the third mission in Rogue Squadron for the N64 for the longest time, something about rescuing a crashed ship called the Nonnah. After that it was smooth sailing...until Fest. Seriously, why does the Rebel Alliance absolutely need three dinky little AT-PTs?!

gently caress Fest, and gently caress you for reminding me of it. Fest is the only mission in the entire game that I could never get more than a Silver on. I've never met anyone else who could do better than that, either. I'm not convinced it's actually possible without cheating.

# ¿ Aug 2, 2012 19:43

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jivjov posted:

I'm only about 5 chapters in to Mercy Kill so far, but it's already managed to surprise and impress me. I was not expecting to see a Vong turn up, and as part of the Wraiths no less. That's one thing that I really think has been criminally underused since NJO wrapped up; there's a crapload of Vong still here in our galaxy, including the Shamed Ones/Extolled who probably love the poo poo out of the New Republic/Galactic Federation of Free Alliances. One day I really want to see the tension between the Vong Remnant and the GFFA in more detail. Hell, do a trilogy using the Vong Remnant in the same way the old Bantam books used the Imperial Remnant

Please tell me it's available in paperback. I really can't afford hardcover right now.

_{Ugh I might have to actually get a library card.}

# ¿ Aug 10, 2012 19:29

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Chairman Capone posted:

That would be awesome if true, especially because I remember an old update to his website back when she was still working for Lucasbooks where he shat on her with surprisingly little of the diplomacy reserved for writers working together.

Please share this. I want to read it so badly.

# ¿ Sep 17, 2012 14:40

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mhachtx posted:

I've been reading Star Wars books for a long time, and I have always known how ridiculous the EU is. However, seeing this picture has completely shattered my ability to rationalize them as a fun series to read. The EU has become to kids playing in the front yard going "No my star destroyer is bigger". Seriously what the gently caress is a malevolent class SSD? I've never heard of that poo poo.

That's because half that poo poo is straight-up fanon. One or two of them are vaguely based on ships seen way in the background of a couple of the comics, but even those ones don't have real names, just "Unidentified Star Destroyer" or poo poo like that. The only actual canon ones there are the Victory, Imperial, Executor, and Eclipse classes.

# ¿ Sep 24, 2012 16:48

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You've got to be making GBS threads me. I knew about the Sith exile thing, but I haven't heard those last two parts.

# ¿ Oct 5, 2012 04:46

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SirPhoebos posted:

First of all, just because it was published early doesn't mean we can't make fun of it . Second, what's notable about the Lando series is that they were written by L. Niel Smith a batshit crazy libertarian (by which I mean more batshit crazy than is normal for a libertarian.) Here's what one of the thread participants had to say:

Isn't that also the guy who had Lando basically poison a planet's water supply because they had the gall to impose import tariffs?

# ¿ Oct 26, 2012 20:54

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What I want most dearly of all is a series of Coruscant Nights movies. Move away from the big, sweeping, galaxy-wide conflict and give us a tough-as-nails Jedi-detective. Bonus points if they keep the semi-noir style of the books.

e: also Wraith Squadron

# ¿ Oct 31, 2012 21:25

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Splendid! posted:

Has anyone ever heard or seen a reference to headlights or landing flood lights on a Snowspeeder/T-47 Airspeeder?

They HAVE to have lights.

I seem to remember a picture from somewhere of a T-47 with a floodlight on its forward landing strut.

# ¿ Nov 8, 2012 22:46

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Metal Loaf posted:

They've done that one already, after a fashion; Darth Andeddu turned out to be a zombie in Legacy. Actually, speaking of Legacy, they certainly ran out of Darth names pretty quickly, didn't they?

I was so sure you were making this up.

:negative:

# ¿ Nov 14, 2012 13:01

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LLJKSiLk posted:

Based on dialog and what we see onscreen and taking into account EU-material, all of the above were onboard. Probably a good deal of slave labor and prisoners as well.

Plus probably administration staff, janitors for areas deemed too sensitive to allows slaves access to, mechanics for every little thing, doctors, chefs, bartenders, strippers, and the Emperor's personal grooming staff.

# ¿ Dec 30, 2012 19:05

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As someone who loved JJTrek, I am okay with this, should it turn out to be true.

# ¿ Jan 25, 2013 10:21

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Ursine Asylum posted:

But yeah that and another jedi managed to kill a ship by himself by inverting the black hole bug as well, although I think those are the only 2 times they do that in the series.

That was also Luke and I'm pretty sure it was by Troy Denning both times.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2013 14:12

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Ursine Asylum posted:

I actually think it was Kyp in an Allston book, unless it happened 3 times.

That's not what I remember, but it's been 4-5 years since I've read them, so you might be right.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2013 18:58

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# ¿ May 16, 2024 22:59

Tumblr of scotch: Mar 13, 2006; Please, don't be my neighbor.

The thing about the Executor-class is that there are a ton of sources all quoting different lengths, some as low as 8000m. The length in that chart isn't the "official" length given in the starwars.com databank, though.

It's even bigger. :shepicide:

# ¿ Mar 6, 2013 08:13

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > The Book Barn > Geeky Star Wars Loser Thread Episode VII: Attack of the bugnest orgies

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