Sophia posted:

They are boring though? Theon's arc got pretty interesting but the viking pirate society as a whole is boring as hell and is also just a rehash of the power struggle going on surrounding the Iron Throne. Asha is Cersei, the woman who uses sex as a tool and thinks she should be able to rule based on ability but is actually not that good of a leader and ultimately still controlled by males. Theon is Ned, the guy looking to follow actual rules of succession and being utterly powerless to make this happen in any way and suffers horribly because of his lack of political savvy. Euron is Tywin, the guy who actually ends up running the show because he is charismatic and powerful and enough of a dick to do what needs to be done.

GRRM is not very good at disguising his recycled ideas.

General Battuta posted:

Ha ha those wacky women menstruating everywhere and crying about how they're treated, I wish this whole 'feminism' fad would just go away

my cat is norris posted:

Yes but her nips are poking out so showing her rear end would be too porny. There are some limits which should be observed.

TheManWithNoName posted:

At least she can get pregnant again and ride her dragons so something has to happen now right? Right??

Blade_of_tyshalle posted:

Ten years ago, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the King's Landing underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire... The A-Team.

bigmcgaffney posted:

Nightmare fuel. Reminds me of American Gods but somehow makes my manhood harder.

Dead Man Posting posted:

Littlefinger, Varys, Tyrion, Ser Selmey, Ilyrio, or Ser Pounce...which one is the best mastermind?

Tony Danza Claus posted:

Yes. Do tell.

savinhill posted:

poo poo, they could've just invited ren faire dorks to the set and used them as extras, probably wouldn't have to pay them either, they'd just be happy being ren faire dorks in a tailor-made ren faire dork setting.

el_brio posted:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-problems-with-living-in-game-thrones-universe/

Lame comedy piece about AGOT but some of the comments are funny.

Contra Calculus posted:

Calling it right now, this is how the series ends. GRRM was just warming us up to aunt-nephew incest by showing the even grosser-by-comparison brother-sister incest between Jaime and Cersei.

I just googled leaders who married their relatives and apparently Franklin D. Roosevelt married his cousin. Wow, didn't know that


I have to agree with this. She's been the most bloodthirsty 8 year old in any book I have ever read. I mean she stabs a fat kid in GoT, she cuts someone's throat in CoK, and I don't even remember all the poo poo she does in SoS aside from leaving Sandor to (not actually) die but it was probably freaky. That being said of that list, she is the most interesting character (with exception to Katniss because I haven't actually read those books so I can't really judge).

Rurik posted:

Too bad it was Dany who was wed to Drogo instead of Asha. I get the feeling she would've known how to appreciate the elements of Dothraki culture much better than our ~princess~ and that the Dothraki would've appreciated her too. She certainly would have left Mirri to die so Drogo wouldn't be dead (like he is now because of Dany's stupidity).

Intel&Sebastian posted:

The true revalation of woods porno is that when you are 18+ and fondly remember back to the time you found porn in the woods you are supposed to go buy some and dump it in the drat woods.

I trust you all will follow through.

whowhatwhere posted:

Oh right, I forgot all about him basically saying he was going to rape her whenever he felt like it because he was king.

Rurik posted:

I really don't remember that scene and how it played out. He went into a whorehouse, why was the prostitute suddenly unwilling?

Fog Tripper posted:

We are arguably past the midpoint of the series (in theory), and the Others have not even become a legitimate threat yet. Resolution? Of what?

I have a feeling that Winter is Coming... long after the books are done.

Ross posted:

Jon didn't feel the fourth stab so there could have hopefully been more stabs in addition to the fourth.

Arnold of Soissons posted:

This is why Coldhands HAS to be Branjen or whatever. Not because of some plot reason, but because the author is hacky with stuff like this, especially after the second or third book.

Tony Danza Claus posted:

Also, didn't Jaime and Brienne appear in ADWD? What happened? I vividly remember the scenery I imagined, but not a single drat word they exchanged.

Blade_of_tyshalle posted:

I always parsed it as dam-fair, like it was a french word. I was really surprised, and felt really stupid, when I realized it was supposed to be damp-hair. I still prefer my original use, because it just sounds cooler, like a title of some sort instead of people openly mocking a holy man.

Joramun posted:

That's just spermantics.

Azure_Horizon posted:

You should probably read Sandkings or Tuf Voyaging. Either of those elevate themselves above genre fiction with ease.

quote:

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why I am gay.

EatDirt posted:

He caught Ser Pounce bedding his own kittens.

whowhatwhere posted:

You're right.

Let's talk about how Tricia Helfer would have made a perfect Cersei instead. She's obviously got the right look and can totally act as well as or better than Lena Headey.

FrozenVent posted:

This is beautiful. "Came up from the rear"

Dead Man Posting posted:

There is something to a big strong warrior making GBS threads and vomiting at the same time, but a little Dany making GBS threads all over the Dothraki Sea just adds depth to her character.

Especially considering that GRRM had the mind to tell us that she did anal with ~My daahrio~ a few chapters before.

And that after all of this was written, he still mentions with perverted chuckles that Dany is hot in an interview. You know he is thinking back to this scene.

SpaceMost posted:

I just spent too much time looking for the excerpt with the "stick 'em with the pointy end" quote so I could re-write it as Gendry/Arya erotica.

I am a bad person.

z0ratio fartboner posted:

zalmoxes posted:

You forgot GIANTS. And where did he steal wargs from anyway? I don't read much fantasy.

whowhatwhere posted:

I've been banging on it ever since I started posting here, but the largest point of ASOIAF is about why we cherish fantasy and myth.

crazypeltast52 posted:

Arya cannot have a love interest! She's an asexual tomboy until she's mature and realizes that she has been in love with GRRM-insert Hot Pie the whole time, then they get married and that mean jock Gendry never comes near her again.

bigmcgaffney posted:

Also my imaginary four year old's favorite part of Gravity's Rainbow is the british candy scene,

Lars Blitzer posted:

That's all right, he also grows a beard, so it's all even.

Alfred P. Pseudonym posted:

Sup yall just finished ADWD and had some thoughts I wanted to share:

- Really loved Meereen, hope we get another book or two worth of Slaver's Bay politics. The machinations of Hizdahr and the Yunkishmen are really what's kept the series fresh for me.

- Favorite new character: Penny. It's nice to see Tyrion have someone with whom to share his dwarf experiences. Plus she seems to really like him! Do I hear wedding bells in the future?

- I'm gonna miss Quentyn Martell. I really thought he had it in him to corral Rhaegal and Viserion, but them's the breaks I guess . Hope we get to see more of Gerris and Arch when Winds of Winter comes out.

Greatbacon posted:

Wouldn't you be excited if a song about a bear raping a maiden were socially acceptable?

(That is what the song is about right? I sort of skimmed over that part cause songs in fantasy books give me gas.)

empty sea posted:

I'm still completely loving confused about the Talisa/Jeyne thing. All I know is that Robb will make the worst loving decision possible. Talisa has a great sob story that makes Robb's bedroom eyes glisten with desire, but I dunno about those hips, girl.

I miss Jeyne. Has Grey Wind growled at Talisa? I need to know the status of Grey Wind. Dire wolf cockblocking y/n?