Metal Thread 202X - lol they suck a bunch, I'm already in an Uber home, bitch

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > No Music Discussion > Metal Thread 202X - lol they suck a bunch, I'm already in an Uber home, bitch

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CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Alright so you guys pretty much ruined the last thread with your terrible opinions. Then I honestly felt like I was in high school again because someone was actually loving talking about Machine Head. So basically I'm rebooting this thread because the other one was getting long anyways. What's going to happen here? You'll probably run it into the ground again.

So anyways I've been off in my own world and there hasn't been a whole lot of legitimate contenders for album of the year except maybe the new Sonne Adam or Necros Christos. Both of these bands put out stellar releases this year, and if you like actual death metal and not some clicky bass drum watered-downed technical pirate-metal jazz-infusion shitfest then check them out.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lU650Yc3590

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UJpS8NIJFyE

:siren:

Oh yeah, and new rules: Gr31lly's and Mrbling's opinions are no longer considered opinions. They are authoritative declarations.

Ready.... set...... go!

# ¿ Aug 29, 2011 02:45

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# ¿ Apr 27, 2024 07:03

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

New Toxic Holocaust is pretty good if you like your thrash a bit more metal than most.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2011 03:04

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

The new Opeth album cannot be discussed here since it's not metal.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2011 03:26

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

I do not have a Korpiklaani tattoo :smug:

But I am covered head to toe in "sunwheel" tattoos.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2011 03:59

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

NO! The Misfits are not metal. They are extremely generic punk. Now quit it.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2011 04:08

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Sgt. Slobber posted:

I just got into metal about a year ago, and my favorite bands are Metallica, Anthrax, Sonata Arctica, Iron Maiden, a7x, Ozzy, Buckethead, and Dethklok (just because it's funny). What else might I like / got any good recommendations for me?

Bolt Thrower.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2011 14:10

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

I think the Misfits' biggest influence was on black metal... at least their recording methods and production quality.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2011 14:40

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Gr31lly posted:

That should cover you for death metal, aside from the obvious stuff like Autopsy and of course, if you dig NC, you've got to check Sonne Adam.

Both of which are in the OP

# ¿ Aug 29, 2011 16:37

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

I just caught wind of Ataraxy, an old school death metal band from Spain. Very cool stuff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cZH_pgrI1Q

# ¿ Aug 30, 2011 11:18

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Efilnikufesin posted:

Why the hatred for pirate metal?

Because it's a tired old gimmick where fat nerds who think pirates are cool get to listen to generic accordions layered over cock-rock guitar riffs while pretending they are living in a year where electric guitars never existed. It's like gangster rap about proofs by induction or 80's synth-pop about heterosexual relationships. It doesn't go together and everyone involved in those scenes are laughing at you constantly while you dress up like a tool thinking you're awesome.

Basically we're better than you.

# ¿ Aug 31, 2011 04:30

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

I'm not really a big fan of power metal but I always have a soft spot in my heart for Finist:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqyAQJ08kg8

# ¿ Sep 1, 2011 06:39

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Dead Man Posting posted:

We should just add to the OP a list.

done

EDIT: Errr, compile a list and I'll put it in the OP. I have no desire to check out any of the bands listed there.

# ¿ Sep 12, 2011 18:43

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

CornHolio posted:

Are we still posting hot babes singing awesome metal?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sCafVpxbFgo

If you compose a list ill put it in the OP, otherwise no.

# ¿ Sep 14, 2011 22:48

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Gaggins posted:

e: Why do metal music videos always suck? I admittedly don't watch many of them because unnecessary shaky-cam drives me nuts. Can you guys recommend any cool videos? Some cheesiness is okay.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4hsse_4UBS4

# ¿ Sep 15, 2011 06:24

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Weaponized Cum posted:

In other news:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EBSODmImPpM

This owns, by the way.

# ¿ Oct 3, 2011 21:36

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Do Not Resuscitate posted:

Bolt Thrower

To be honest, you could probably just post "Bolt Thrower" randomly in the middle of every page of this thread, and it would be relevant to the discussion somehow.

# ¿ Oct 19, 2011 18:59

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

fatherdog posted:

By that logic, Motorhead should have never released more than one album.

This I actually agree with.

# ¿ Oct 19, 2011 19:11

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

This is why there's the Gr31lly rule in the OP.

Also, Arghoslent is amazing, I think they are the only melodic death metal band I enjoy.

EDIT: And The Chasm.

EDIT2: And Infinitum Obscure, but really I guess all the mexican death metal bands fall under "melodic death metal"

CRIP EATIN BREAD fucked around with this message at 15:22 on Oct 26, 2011

# ¿ Oct 26, 2011 15:18

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

QPZIL posted:

That's what I figured. But their interviews sort of dance around it. "Oh, ha ha, yeah, we uh, we don't consider ourselves a NSBM band. I mean, we share SOME of the NS views, but I mean, it's all about the MUSIC, ya know?"

I guess "some of the views" equates to hating blacks.

They also refuse to ship their CDs to Israel.

Grand Belial's Key's Kosherat is a really good album, though.

# ¿ Oct 26, 2011 19:31

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

I'm never going to put a big list of youtube videos in the OP because I spent nearly 7 minutes crafting up that OP and I consider it absolutely perfect.

# ¿ Oct 27, 2011 16:34

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Feast of Burden posted:

I don't know if this has made the rounds here yet, but I'll be damned if this isn't hilarious on so many levels.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WQin6rnTzYQ

RIP Chris Barnes' career.

# ¿ Nov 17, 2011 21:17

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Speaking of bootleg shirts, I just stumbled across this:

http://tshirtslayer.com/item/worst-bootleg-metal-shirts-ever

These are all amazing.

# ¿ Nov 18, 2011 17:22

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Orbital Sapling posted:

The new Cynic EP sucks. I am quite sad.

At least they're consistent.

# ¿ Nov 26, 2011 22:29

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

MrBling posted:

Slayer are playing Copenhell 2012 next summer. Are they still worth watching?

No. They sound as old as they really are.

MrBling posted:

Of those I really only want to see Anthrax but there is still another 8 bands that haven't been named yet.

I would definitely want to see this.

# ¿ Dec 14, 2011 22:28

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

aliencowboy posted:

I'm demoting your objective metal facts to be subjective opinions in my heart.

Read the OP, you can't do this.

# ¿ Dec 23, 2011 13:28

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

I saw Black Sabbath something like 5 or 6 years ago with the original line up, and Bill Ward was jamming the gently caress out of his kit. gently caress Sharon.

# ¿ Feb 8, 2012 18:00

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Cannibal Corpse may be my favorite band to see live. They play every song perfectly live and the sound is always good. Corpsegrinder was an excellent choice as a new frontman.

# ¿ Feb 9, 2012 16:32

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Misogynist posted:

"New"? He's been with the band almost three times as long as Chris Barnes.

Well, I mean new as in a replacement.

# ¿ Feb 10, 2012 22:12

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

The Clit Avoider posted:

A small sample of why Canada rules extremely hard when it comes to metal .

and lets not forget about these guys.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2012 14:28

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Bolt Thrower

# ¿ Mar 19, 2012 18:10

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Johnny Cage posted:

As a general rule of thumb you should avoid music from Sweden.

Entombed, theory destroyed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oxR4zQiSHQc

# ¿ Mar 22, 2012 14:15

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

RHTITE posted:

Slayer - Show No Mercy

The best Slayer album.

# ¿ Apr 8, 2012 04:18

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

rxcowboy posted:

So basically I just fell in love with a band I will realistically never see live. Fantastic.

Welcome to Death Metal.

# ¿ Apr 9, 2012 15:24

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

rxcowboy posted:

With that in mind, what else should I look into? I appreciate the anti organized religious themes of most black metal as much as the next guy, but I'm more interested in hearing a band that isn't afraid to take a risk. I would rather hear an album that takes risks and makes some big mistakes than a flawlessly executed album that is basically a thematic rehash of material covered by other bands. I already have a shitload of albums like that.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PpPLOw0-874

I'm a sucker for Grand Belial's Key.

# ¿ Apr 22, 2012 14:39

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

New Kreator isn't very good but "Pleasure to Kill" is a better album than anything Iron Maiden has ever released.

# ¿ Apr 30, 2012 04:17

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

I'm really digging Ascended's "Temple of Dark Offerings". Any other recommendations for Death Metal with vocals as guttural as this?

# ¿ May 14, 2012 02:32

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Show No Mercy is hands down my favorite album.

# ¿ Jun 6, 2012 15:17

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

I've pimped these guys out before, but I'm going to do it again because I just introduced someone to them and their only full length is easily in my top 10 death metal albums (and possibly metal in general) of all time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-R4xq9mgssY

Perfect 90's death metal, although I think their label hindered their success and they ended up putting out an amazing EP, and then disappearing forever.

# ¿ Jun 15, 2012 03:32

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Turk February posted:

Coffin Texts
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ydgh2X6zXcE

This rules a lot.

# ¿ Jul 6, 2012 14:43

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# ¿ Apr 27, 2024 07:03

CRIP EATIN BREAD: Jun 24, 2002; Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T; Soiled Meat

Weaponized Cum posted:

Preach it brother. Let's listen to Church of Misery instead.

Church of Misery always has, and always will own:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N7eP-DFReyA

# ¿ Jul 11, 2012 04:47

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > No Music Discussion > Metal Thread 202X - lol they suck a bunch, I'm already in an Uber home, bitch

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