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Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012
There's a thread too.

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Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012
Every time authorities begin to investigate it for fraud the university burns down and starts over somewhere else.

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012
One weird trick insurers hate!

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012



Love it, all sounds extremely on-brand for everyone's favorite humanity-protecting undead monsters.

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012

DressCodeBlue posted:

I started a write up of being 3 years deep into running my first campaign, but the entire situation currently boils down to this:

We keep coming back to sexy liches and my players keep giving me positive reinforcement. Why do they love hot liches. Why am I doing this. Send help.

Cat Face Joe posted:

second page wtf??



:bsdsnype:

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012

Aeschylus posted:

The central doors open, disclosing the interior of the temple. ORESTES clings to the central altar; the FURRIES lie slumbering at a little distance; APOLLO and HERMES appear from the innermost shrine.

APOLLO to ORESTES

Lo, I desert thee never: to the end,
Hard at thy side as now, or sundered far,
I am thy guard,

quote:

Scorch him with reek of fire that burns in
you,
Waste him with new pursuit-swift, hound him down!

The GHOST sinks.

FIRST FURRY awaking

Up! rouse another as I rouse thee; up!
Sleep'st thou? Rise up,

quote:

The CHORUS OF FURRIES enters, questing like hounds.

LEADER OF THE CHORUS

Ho! clear is here the trace of him we seek:
Follow the track of blood, the silent sign!

CobiWann posted:

According to my DM, there's "a pretty big loving difference" between furies and furries.

Idk they seem interchangable here. :shrug:

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012

CzarChasm posted:

Is that a typo, or isn't that kind of a high STR for a Warlock?

It's weak for an rear end-Warlock

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012
Have the DM roll on tables to fill in the blanks every time you summon a new cursed sword

Gnarl the Elf Ripper is a broadsword with a bejewelled hilt and a lead pommel. It is cursed with a sentient curse of lethargy (-2 to movement) and occasionally bursts into flames.

Pox the Hell Chunker is a rapier with a dripping hilt and a rubber pommel. It is cursed with Summon Dire Wasp (1d6 on hit, summon wasp on 5+, wasp attacks random target within 1d6 spaces) and hates dogs.

etc etc

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012

Ichabod Sexbeast posted:

"COME ON DOWN TO VIKTOR'S SENTIENT SWORD EMPORIUM, THE WIDEST SELECTION OF CURSED AND SENTIENT SWORDS THIS SIDE OF THE FEYWILD! WE GOT GREATSWORDS, WE GOT SHORTSWORDS, WE GOT EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN!

FOLKS, THESE CURSES ARE DRIVING ME TO A DEEP AND UNHINGED MADNESS THROUGH KNOWLEDGE MORTAL MEN WERE NEVER MEANT TO KNOW, BECAUSE I'M OFFERING DISCOUNTS MORTAL MEN WERE NEVER MEANT TO HAVE!"

Take my gold :golfclap:

"How cursed could a sword this cheap really be, anyway?"

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012

CobiWann posted:


...and according to my DM, Warlocks may not serve two Patrons at the same time. The spell is Polymorph, not Polypact.

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012
Having seen the first couple pages of replies to the tweet ("...[T]here have always been female Custodians."), I would describe it as more of a deep and turbulent sea of cat piss filled with writhing, incredibly mad assholes.

edit, a sampling of the piss, skipping the ones with wild slurs
edit 2: thrown behind spoilers per feedback

Four pages of debit charges and Games Workshop receipts attached to the tweet posted:

I've been a GW customer for over 30 years. This is the kind of money I spend on GW products. Whether it's at my FLGS, online stores, the GW webstore, or other sources. I collect over a dozen 40K armies totaling approximately 50,000 points, one of which is over 4,000 points of Adeptus Custodes. I have multiple Blood Bowl teams and Necromunda gangs. I'm currently building a Bretonnia army for The Old World, and I was about to start collecting Orcs & Goblins and Tomb Kings. I have over 100 Black Library novels. And I'm subscribed to Warhammer+.

I went ahead and cancelled my Warhammer+ subscription and I'm going to pause my spending on Warhammer products for the time being and take some time to reevaluate how much, if anything, I want to spend in the future. If you're not going to respect the time and effort that people put into the setting and learning about the world you've built, if you're not going to support the customers who've helped build your company for decades, then I don't see a reason to put any effort into supporting GW in return.

>:-( posted:

I'll just walk away. You aren't going to replace the income lost making the 100 women who care happy.

give me PROOF posted:

Show me in the previous Codices where it says that.

I won't stop playing but I WILL start stealing posted:

I am a female player. I have Ultramarines, Orcs, chaos marines and I collect various minis that I enjoy, like Grimaldus.

From now on, I will be 3D printing. I will pirate your books and share them with all of my friends for free. This pandering is insulting and condescending.

??? posted:

*black void of space, nothing living exists*

"aCkShUaLIY tHeRe Have Always BeEn FeMaLe AsTeRoldS"

Bro what

a wild bigot appears! posted:

Have fun ending up like Star Wars! Get ready for pridehammer 40,000 guys, where the diverseperium of they/them fight the evil biggoted forces of the cis white male

woke WoKe wOKE posted:

Nonsense. You're pandering to woke trash. Bud Light tried something similar, it didn't end well.

Rule 1: I play to escape from females in reality posted:

I'm not buying anything else. You made a cool universe. Stick to the rules of it or it ruins it. I play Warhammer and I read Warhammer because it's fun escapism not because I want to engage in contemporary politics.

I was totally going to play really really soon, but posted:

Woke liars. I've been reading some lore and thinking about getting into Warhammer, maybe I won't now.

Lord Awkward fucked around with this message at 17:58 on Apr 16, 2024

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012

the_steve posted:

I went with forest because I would not have forgiven myself if I didn't go for the Whizzard reference.

Fair!

quote:

Some dipshit named Mark Kern or something like that seems to be leading the charge, if you really want to just hop into a black hole of catpiss with a heaping side of grift.

Pass, lmao, what I saw was bad enough

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012

This is fair. I thought this thread had replaced the old good/bad/catpiss experiences thread, but also looking at the OP that was like twelve years ago and if I'm wrong I'm wrong.
Thrown behind spoilers for now, and if you all want it deleted instead I'll do that.

Stabbey_the_Clown posted:

Maybe later I can edit this post to add in my story of how my recent campaign crashed and burned after just four sessions, and I didn't mind.

Please do.

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Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012

CobiWann posted:

In response to being knocked down but getting up again, Piran

♪(Oh Piran boy, Piran boy, Piran boy)
I get knocked down, but I get up again
You're never gonna keep me down♪


Your DM never fails to impress with their dedication to models and terrain, the airship and train are great

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