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Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
1945 Yankees
1957 Red Sox
1964 Yankees
1997 Red Sox (these guys...they were the first team I saw play in the MLB...sniff)

for 11 points. More details:



Home Town: Cooperstown, New York

Home Stadium: Fenway Park, as per modern day

DH Preference: YES

25 Man Roster

C Elston Howard (64 Y)
1B Mo Vaughn (97 RS)
2B Snuffy Stirnweiss (45 Y)
3B John Valentin (97 RS)
SS Nomar Garciaparra (97 RS)
LF Ted Williams (57 RS)
CF Mickey Mantle (64 Y)
RF Roger Maris (64 Y)
DH Charlie Keller (45 Y)

C Scott Hatteberg (97 RS)
1B Nick Etten (45 Y)
3B Frank Malzone (57 RS)
OF Jim Piersall (57 RS)
OF Jackie Jensen (57 RS)

SP1 Whitey Ford (64 Y)
SP2 Frank Sullivan (57 RS)
SP3 Jim Bouton (64 Y) preferably the "flamethrowing" version thanks
SP4 Tim Wakefield (97 RS)
SP5 Mel Stottlemeyer (64 Y)

CL Tom Gordon (97 RS)
SU Butch Henry (97 RS)
RP Jeff Suppan (97 RS)
RP Al Downing
RP Red Ruffing (45 Y)
LR/SP Bret Saberhagen (97 RS)

In the Minors: Jesus christ I don't know....

C Jason Varitek
SP Derek Lowe
OF Troy O'Leary

Line-ups:

Where DH applies, versus RHP

1. Stirnweiss (2B)
2. Garciaparra (SS)
3. Williams (LF)
4. Mantle (CF)
5. Vaughn (1B)
6. Maris (RF)
7. Keller (DH)
8. Howard (C)
9. Valentin (3B)

Versus LHP,

1. Stirnweiss (2B)
2. Garciaparra (SS)
3. Williams (LF)
4. Mantle (CF)
5. Keller (DH)
6. Howard (C)
7. Vaughn (1B)
8. Valentin (3B)
9. Maris (RF)


Strategy (Rate on a scale from -5 to +5)

Hit and Run: -5
Sacrifice Bunt: -5
Squeeze Play: 0
Trying for extra bases: 0
Stealing Bases: -5
Aggressively Tagging Up: 0
Pitch Outs (to prevent stolen bases): 2
Giving Intentional Walks: 1
Pitching Around Good Hitters: 2
Bringing the Infield In: 3
Guarding the Lines: 1
Making Cutoff Throws: 2
Bringing in Pinch Hitters: -2
Bringing in Pinch Runners: 0
Bringing in Defensive Replacements: 1
Starting Pitchers on Short Rest: -1
Letting pitchers pitch throw trouble: 2
Letting Pitchers rack up high pitch counts: 2

So, er, we need pitching. I'm open to serious offers of good starters of any era, especially if they ever wore a Yankees or BoSox uniform.

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Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Operation Offensive Juggernaut is go! And to think, they all laughed at Snuffy. Now all we need is some halfway decent pitching, and for Whitey Ford to get some wins. In fact, we just need wins.

Roster Changes:

Bring Saberhagen in as #3 Pitcher. Move Stottlemeyer into Saberhagen's relief postion. Move Bouton to #5 pitcher.

Hatteberg becomes the personal catcher to Bouton.

Trade Stuff:

The Arguments still need starting pitching. I am keen to pick up a good righty starter.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Well it's not like I didn't know pitching was going to be a problem. HELP!

Important Roster Stuff:

Take Jim Bouton out and shoot him. Let Derek Lowe take his place :ohdear:

It's Hatteberg Time! Lets see just how bad Hatteberg will stink up the place. Swap Hatteberg in for Howard as day-to-day catcher. Howard becomes Whitey Ford's personal catcher, and plays versus lefties. :ohdear:

And, ugh, 3B. Valentin needs a week off...so please put Malzone in for him for 7 games, then platoon them if possible:- 4 games Valentin : 2 Malzone. :gonk:

Hitting Order vs RHP:

1. Stirnweiss 2B
2. Garciaparra SS
3. Williams DH
4. Mantle CF
5. Vaughn 1B
6. Maris RF
7. Keller LF
8. Hatteberg C
9. Malzone 3B may God have mercy on him and us all, at least until Valentin recovers.

Vs LHP:

1. Stirnweiss 2B
2. Garciaparra SS
3. Williams DH
4. Mantle CF
5. Vaughn 1B
6. Maris RF
7. Keller LF
8. Howard C
9. Malzone 3B (until the glorious return of John Valentin)

And for the love of the tiny baby Jesus, somebody trade me a pitcher...

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Dagnammit...I ordered Jim Bouton liquidated and replaced with Derek Lowe!

Please, exchange Jim Bouton for Derek Lowe (from AAA).

Other news:

I bid 64 Jim Bouton and 1 Ratings Challenge for the 98 David Cone

I also bid 57 Frank Sullivan and 1 Ratings Challenge on the 06 Roy Halladay

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


I'm changing my bids, since they are apparently worthless (JIM BOUTON!).

For the 06 Roy Halladay, I bid the 64 Jim Bouton, the 57 Frank Sullivan, and One (1) Ratings Challenge.

For the 98 David Cone, I bid a 97 Derek Lowe, a 2nd Round Draft Pick, and One (1) Ratings Challenge.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp

mks5000 posted:

I might be just bitter because you are foiling my grand scheme to have Double David Cone (DD Cone if you will), but come on dude, it's just David Cone.

But...but....but....OK.



I hereby untable my ridiculous bid for 98 David Cone.

I think I saw him in an almost-perfect-game duel with Mike Mussina in 2001....

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Rest players as and when necessary. That goes without saying.

Roster Moves:

Exchange Mel Stottlemyre for Frank Sullivan in the rotation.

Drop the catcher (whomsoever that benighted soul is) to hit 9th in all line-ups with DH, 8th without DH.

And for the love of Jesus, somebody tell Smasher we don't really want David Cone anymore! We withdraw our bid! We're sorry! It's all our fault, what can we do to make it right? How about a Blingee'd picture of Snuffy?

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Well, if I can use up the unneeded feeder players...



I hereby bid the remainder of the 45 Yankees pitching rotation for the 06 Roy Halladay

(eg. Tiny Bonham, Al Gettel, Monk Dubiel, Hank Borowy, Bill Zuber, Jim Turner, Joe Page, Ken Holcomb, Steve Roser, Atley Donald, Spud Chandler aaand Paul Schreiber)

and every 1957 Red Sox pitcher for the66 Steve Carlton

(so that's Frank Sullivan, Tom Brewer, Willard Nixon, Mike Fornieles, Dave Sisler, Ike Delock, Bob Porterfield, George Susce, Rudy Minarcin, Bob Chakales, Dean Stone, Murray Wall, Frank Baumann, Russ Meyer, Russ Kemerer and good ol' Jack Spring)

Robert Deadford fucked around with this message at 22:14 on Nov 12, 2012

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Yes, I guess Bouton gets to come in for Ruffing. For 10 days only!

Other changes:

Bring in Piersall for Mantle and Jensen for Maris until the starters feel a bit more chipper (ie. until they're not sore any more).

Let Valentin play 2nd until Snuffy is fit again, and Malzone covers 3rd. And Etten to 1B until Mo recovers.

Ugh, what this does to the hitting isn't worth thinking about. Piersall hits in Mantle's spot, and Valentin leads off, otherwise it'll be Jensen 6 - Malzone 7 - Etten 8 - Catcher 9.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp

Smasher Dynamo posted:


Pick the winners, games and final score!
second team in each matchup has home-field advantage
Burma Imperialists vs. Rockford Losers
Fukuoka Finger-Bangers vs. Dubai Dervishes
Finger Lakes Phoenixes vs. Ryleh Cultists
South Bolton Eazy W's vs. Chicago Bobbleheads

Pick two teams to advance!
Idaho Potatoes
Old Hoss Radbourns
Poughkeepsie Superbas
Rated R Superstars



Play-offs:

Rockford in 4, final game 2-1
Dubai in 3, final game 6-3
Ryleh in 5, final game 3-0
South Bolton in 4, final game 8-5

Gauntlet:

Rated R and Idaho to advance!

EDIT: Updated to the correct standards!

Robert Deadford fucked around with this message at 21:19 on Nov 15, 2012

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Rest up my wounded closer! Let Frank Sullivan close for a week, with JIM BOUTON!!!! recalled from the gulag to cover.

Yes, pitching is the priority in the draft, plus a catcher who can hit and a genuine third baseman. I hope (pray) Roy Halladay will help out: he can't be worse than the guys he's replacing.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Pick 'em Round 2:

Madison and Goose Eggs to advance!

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Pick 'em!

Cleveland and Madison to advance!

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Pick 'em!

Polyarny and Juneau to advance!

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Jimmy Foxx...that's the last time you let me down!



Pick 'em!

Cleveland and Barrow to advance!

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Draft Picks:

Round 1: Best Starting Pitcher available

Sandwich Pick (in the event of a miracle): best Reliever available

Round 2: Best Catcher available

Round 3: Best starting pitcher or 3B or Reliever available, please use your impeccable judgement (you were right about Saberhagen after all)

Superleague teams! Do you want the number 5 pick? I'll sell it for the right price: a Superleague quality SP and a Superleague quality catcher.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Pick 'em!

Fingerbangers in 6, final game 5-1

Phoenixes in 6, final game 6-3

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Pick 'em!

Unicorns and Googlie Mooglies to advance.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Pick 'em!

Cleveland and Florida to advance!

Draft Update!

Round 1: I would prefer to get Roger Clemens over Pete Alexander. No reason.

Round 2: Catcher: if neither Munson nor Bill Dickey are available, draft the best remaining SP, but not Whitey Ford - one of him is plenty.

Round 3: Best available reliever or hitter, any position.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Pick 'em!

Since I'm doing so very well at this, I guess it's time to throw caution to the wind!

Bobbleheads in 5, final game 7-0!

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Pick 'em!

Cleveland and Lombard Street to advance!

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Pick 'em!

Cleveland, Florida and Portland to survive!

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


With the 4th pick of the draft, the New England Arguments select a man who can understand both sides of the debate...

SP 1995 Roger Clemens

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Looking over my list of intended picks, Willie might fall all the way to San Juan, who have stated they want Stan Musial, or even further. 5 teams are after 2Bs, 3Bs or SSs, two teams are looking for catchers, two are after SPs and two are going for the Golden Oldies. The Cuba Smokers said they were after pitching too.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


If Manifunk Destiny accepts his fate, with the 22nd pick of the draft, the Arguments select '34 Gabby Hartnett

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Since everyone is getting all frisky with this whole trading malarkey, this is what I need, in order of priority:

some decent relievers;

a 3B who is a better hitter than John Valentin, and an equivalent fielder at worst;

an OF who gets on base better than Roger Maris;

a utility middle infielder.

What I can offer:

my remaining picks and/or all the unused players on my feeders (45 and 64 Yankees, 57 and 97 Red Sox, and there is an MVP lurking among them).

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Sorry guys! I'm in Central Europe and will make a decision in the next two hours. I'm thinking over the trade proposals.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp

ToiletofSadness posted:

I can offer you 93 Robin Ventura, who is much better than John Valentin in every way. How's this?

Arguments offer:
#38 pick
#61 pick

Losers offer:
93 Ventura
#80 pick

What about the #61 pick for Ventura?

EDIT: Mornacale, where are you on IRC? I have Skype or Yahoo! for chat.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
I guess the question is, do you have anything better than a 1996 Robb Nen?

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Let me mull it over for a little while.

EDIT: Mulling complete!



Many thanks for the trade offers, but I feel like I've not been offered enough value for the 38th pick, which will be spent on 1996 Robb Nen

Robert Deadford fucked around with this message at 11:58 on Dec 7, 2012

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Damnation! I was thinking of taking Stieb! I don't trust the rookie Mike Mussina - I've already got rookie Stottlemeyer and rookie Lowe - so instead I hereby select:

1984 Rick Sutcliffe

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Goddamn mystery box

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
And now we proudly present the new and improved Super League VIII



Feeders: '45 and '64 Yankees, '57 and '97 Red Sox

Position Players

C Gabby Hartnett '34 Cubs
1B Mo Vaughn '97RS
2B Snuffy Stirnweiss '45Y
SS Nomar Garciaparra '97RS
3B John Valentin '97RS
LF Ted Williams '57RS
CF Mickey Mantle '64Y
RF Roger Maris '64Y

DH Charlie Keller '45Y

Bench

C Elston Howard '64Y
1B Nick Etten '45Y
3B Frank Malzone '57RS
OF Jim Piersall '57RS
OF Jackie Jensen '57RS

Batting Order, with DH, against LHP and RHP
1. Snuffy Stirnweiss 2B
2. Gabby Hartnett C
3. Ted Williams LF *
4. Mickey Mantle CF (Switch)
5. Mo Vaughn 1B *
6. Charlie Keller DH *
7. Nomar Garciaparra SS
8. Roger Maris RF *
9. John Valentin 3B

Without DH, Keller replaces Maris in RF.

Howard acts as personal catcher to whoever is the current SP4.

Pitching

SP1 Roger Clemens '95 Red Sox
SP2 Whitey Ford '64Y
SP3 Roy Halladay '06 Blue Jays
SP4 Bret Saberhagen '97RS
SP5 Rick Sutcliffe '84 Indians/Cubs

LR Tim Wakefield '97RS
MR Derek Lowe '97RS
MR Mel Stottlemeyer '64Y
SU Tom Gordon '97RS
SU Butch Henry '97RS
CL Robb Nen '96 Marlins

Minors
C Jason Varitek '97RS
UT Jeff Frye '97 RS
OF Troy O'Leary '97RS
P Al Downing '64Y
P Spud Chandler '45Y (I went there, Smasher, I need to know!)

Strategy (Rate on a scale from -5 to +5):

Hit and Run: -3
Sacrifice Bunt: -5
Squeeze Play: -1
Trying for extra bases: 0
Stealing Bases: 0
Aggressively Tagging Up: 0
Pitch Outs (to prevent stolen bases): 0
Giving Intentional Walks: -1
Pitching Around Good Hitters: -1
Bringing the Infield In: 0
Guarding the Lines: 0
Making Cutoff Throws: 0
Bringing in Pinch Hitters: -3
Bringing in Pinch Runners: -3
Bringing in Defensive Replacements: 0
Starting Pitchers on Short Rest: -4
Letting pitchers pitch through trouble: +2
Letting Pitchers rack up high pitch counts: +2

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp

Smasher Dynamo posted:

Some days I think you all don't appreciate me.

Just kidding. I know you don't.

Smasher League Week 1 Injury Report

One of you rear end in a top hat expansion teams finally won some kind of title!

New England Arguments
Whitey Ford (SP) (Stir Crazy in Cooperstown) - 56 days

Well poo poo. I suppose he gets to go for an eight week furlough somewhere and rest his addled brainmeats. Meanwhile, we'll just have to wiggle the rotation around a little to manage: move Halladay up to be the number 2 starter, make Saberhagen the number three and summon Mel Stottlemeyer to be the new number four, after they've had their next start each. As for a bullpen replacement, hosed if I know. Let me consult my roster...

EDIT: better put Al Downing in the pen this month.

Robert Deadford fucked around with this message at 02:38 on Dec 16, 2012

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
But what if its a videophone? We're in an alternate reality where there are rocket cycles. Surely the telecommunications industry isn't lagging behind! And a gentleman would not answer the videophone without an immaculately trimmed goatee.

Mark Grace finishes shaving like the gent he is: option B

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
It was probably Mark Grace from Earth-2 on the phone anyway, so Option C

Also, where was Roger Clemens for the Arguments' first game of the season? I mean, Wakefield did a bang-up job, but come on.

EDIT: not criticising, just curious!

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


This is silly. The Rocket rests, make Wakefield the no. 1 starter until he's fit.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp


Woop woop! Champions! It's a great day for the Arguments. Truly, the Snuffster is living large and in charge.

Oh, and it can hardly be considered my fault that two of my starting pitchers are injured. At least Tim is doing me proud: when Clemens returns, move Tim into the no. 4 slot and return Stottlemeyer to the bullpen.

And Silvio Berlusconi is a dickhead. Mark Grace is more interested in the Golden Dawn: A

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Frankly, who cares about gyros? There's grinding to be done down in the sewers.

Option A!

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Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp

Smasher Dynamo posted:

Man, by the end of this season, this thread is going to have 20 views a day, and half of them will be mine.

Smasher League Week 5 Injury Report



New England Arguments
Bret Saberhagen (SP) (It's Bret Saberhagen, an injury was inevitable) - 27 days



AAAAAAAAAAAARGH.

Fine, whatever. Clemens should be fit again soon, so slot him into Saberhagen's spot in the rotation. That should make the rotation:

1. Wakefield
2. Halladay
3. Clemens
4. Stottlemeyer
5. Some eejit I picked up in the draft

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