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Part I - My kid (10 months) also only goes to sleep with a boob. I find it annoying some nights, but learning to nurse in a sling has been helpful, since I can get some stuff done while nursing. Or at least I don't feel quite as tied down since I can move while he's nursing. No Cry Sleep Solution has been a helpful guide for us too. Part II - He really, really needs to get out of the house on a daily basis. You may have to simply insist that he try it for a week or two. After realizing that I was edging towards depression again, I made it a goal to get out the house with the baby once a day, even if only for a walk around the neighborhood. It truly helps. It sometimes feels like a huge hassle to gather all our crap just to hang out at the park for an hour or two, but in the end, I need it for my own mental health. The grind of laundry, cooking, cleaning, and baby-related stuff starts to get to me if I don't talk to other adults. I found a great co-op preschool group near me on Meetup.com; hopefully your husband can hook up with a similar group.
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Sep 22, 2012 00:16
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ChloroformSeduction posted:Has anyone tried gDiapers, the ones with the flushable (or reuseable) inserts? I'm thinking of switching from sposies, and these seem like the best bet. I haven't tried those specific ones, but have a bunch of other cloth diapers. My favorites are still the BumGenius 4.0s with snaps. I looked into the gDiapers at first too, but I think I would now find that style too fussy compared to pocket diapers - and they're just as expensive. Our diaper stash is about half pocket diapers, and half prefolds with covers, and then a handful of things I just have one of because I wanted to see how much I like them. Prefolds are pretty awesome because they're super inexpensive, easy to wash, and easy to grab and use as a burp cloth or changing pad. Green Mountain Diapers has a great reputation for their prefolds.
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Sep 23, 2012 15:56
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Brennanite posted:I'm struggling to wean my son. He's 13 months and just does not want to stop nursing, especially at night. I'm aiming for 2 or 3 feedings a day--morning, evening, and once in the night. He wants to nurse pretty much every 3-4 hours from evening on. (I suspect he'd want to do similarly during the day, but I'm not around.) Frankly, my nipples are no longer up to such frequent feedings, and there's not enough milk anyway. So he's not eating solids regularly yet, or just isn't particularly into them? That may be something you need to see your pediatrician about, or a lactation consultant. After 13 months, I can understand wanting to cut down on your nursing schedule somewhat, but ideally it should be gradual. All the best advice I've seen has come from Kellymom.com. You can try don't-offer-don't-refuse (which is pretty much what it sounds like), or cutting out one nursing session per week. Demanding to nurse so often might have some other cause too; maybe he's looking for a way to reconnect with you. Perhaps babywearing for a few hours in the evening (on your back & away from your boobs) would give him the closeness he would otherwise want from nursing.
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Sep 25, 2012 03:23
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Eggplant Wizard posted:Hey guys, my friend has a 3 month old and she's having trouble getting her to sleep. She hasn't been trying any particular method and she didn't have luck with a schedule (I don't know how hard they tried.). The baby has had nasty nasty colic and is only now becoming less like a crying machine and more like a baby, from what I understand. She (baby) never naps for more than 30 minutes but occasionally sleeps through the night and she slept 11 hours last night. Can someone suggest some resources for her to look at different methods? I don't know anything about what to look for except that if I mention CIO in this thread there'll be problems No Cry Nap Solution is the book I'd recommend for troubleshooting short naps. No Cry Sleep Solution is good too, but I feel like the Nap book's organization was particularly helpful (figuring out what to try with a catnapper vs. needs to nurse to sleep type of baby, etc.). It helped give me some concrete stuff to try, and is all about finding out what methods/routines work for you or your family. Things are gradually getting better for us in terms of naps and bedtime, so I'm happy with our more gentle approach. My big issue with a lot of the sleep training stuff I see around is that it's a "one size fits all" sort of solution, and I don't think it's compassionate towards the baby.
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Nov 4, 2012 04:44
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Red is Dead posted:Thought I might ask the thread. Yes. WAY too early to expect a baby to be okay with being on their own. Get "No Cry Sleep Solution" and/or "No Cry Nap Solution" and read up on what normal infant sleep patterns are, and make a plan for your bedtime routine. Every kid and every family is different, so you'll need to think about what works best for your situation. That doesn't sound like a lot of sleep for a newborn, so it's no wonder your wife is tired. A good babycarrier could help with getting the baby down to sleep instead of using arms or a lap. They're not cheap, but it's the piece of gear I couldn't do without once I was on my own with a baby all the time. quote:Part the second - wifey's really up on breast feeding. coupled with the lack of sleep meaning she's walking around like a zombie at the moment. I'm doing what I can, nappy changes, winding, taking care of the baby in the evening so that she can sleep. I'd ideally like her to start expressing so that for the evening feeds, she can sleep uninterrupted. She's unsure of doing this, because of the bond of breastfeeding. The problem I see with your plan is that breastfeeding is all about supply and demand. If your wife is going long periods at night (3+ hours) without breastfeeding, then her supply for those hours is going to decrease. Not breastfeeding for longer periods also could lead to clogged ducts or mastitis. It's really important to do all you can to build a good milk supply in those first two to three months. Supply problems are really stressful. Being a breastfeeding zombie sucks though; I've been there. The good news is that it doesn't last forever, and they start to consolidate their sleep cycles into a more "normal" schedule. For me, co-sleeping was the answer for getting more sleep at night. I also find it helps my son nap for longer, so if I'm pooped out and its his naptime, I'll just lay down with him and take a snooze. It would be really great if your wife could do this at least once a day so she's getting some rest.
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Nov 7, 2012 02:27
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LizzieBorden posted:Hello! I'm sorry if this isn't OK to post here. Books are my go-to present for all ages, too. Art supplies are great as well. In general, stuff that can be used creatively is pretty much universally better than a toy that has basically only one way to play with it. Stuff that makes a lot of noise makes me curse the person who bought it for my kid.
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Nov 20, 2012 19:43
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Konomex posted:Update and a new question. Her teeth haven't popped through yet, they're doing that up down thingy... but she seems fine with it for now. Tummy time sucks if you can't figure out how to move your body. I second the suggestion of wearing your baby a lot during the day rather than leave her laying down on her back in a basinette, swing, etc. The idea of tummy time came about because babies were constantly on their backs or in a baby container of some sort. With babywearing, they get a lot of gentle practice holding their head and adjusting their body as you move around. Interestingly, there are some child development folks who believe that you should let babies learn to roll, crawl, and walk at their own pace, and not interfere by putting them into positions they can't get into themselves (here's some more info on that: http://www.janetlansbury.com/2009/09/set-me-free/).
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Nov 22, 2012 20:47
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We do mostly grown-up music at my house, too. The Beatles, Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Frank Sinatra, and soundtracks from various musicals. Part of my reasoning is that I want my kid to know what "real" music sounds like, and to encourage musicality. I read an interesting book awhile back about developing musicianship in your kids, and one of the best things you can do is talk about the music you're listening to and why you like it.
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Nov 28, 2012 19:31
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lllllllllllllllllll posted:So far I've been trying to be stoic and cheerful but showing how this feels is good advice. One of the best parenting / relating-to-kids books that I've ever read is called "Playful Parenting" by Lawrence Cohen. I'm not a naturally playful person, and connect a lot better with older kids. Especially with younger kids, it showed me how playing is a powerful form of communication, and that it's how they work through their emotions and anxieties.
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Dec 4, 2012 23:15
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Bollock Monkey posted:My friend has a kid who will turn 1 at the end of this month. I'm sending her something small for Christmas but I'd also like to get something for the baby as well. I know that new parents are often inundated with clothes and toys, so I was wondering what little bits and bobs you guys would've really appreciated when your child was around that age? It needs to be something small enough to post internationally without breaking the bank, but I really have no idea what would be useful/appreciated! I've got a kid the same age, and I would love it if he got gift membership to the zoo or childrens' museum, or something along those lines. No mess to clean up, most importantly. It also makes it so much easier to do several short visits, vs. trying to fit everything into one longer visit so as to get your money's worth on a one-day ticket. Here's the kiddo on his birthday. 
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Dec 6, 2012 16:06
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I'm flying with my 13-month old kiddo on Christmas, and as usual before travelling, I'm wrecked with anxiety. I flew with him solo when he was 5 months old, but he wasn't walking then, not to mention that he was so much physically smaller. We've done some lengthy car trips too, but I think it's the "lap infant" aspect that has me the most worried. Any tips/tricks for keeping your lap infant from kicking the seat in front of you? Were you able to keep your active toddler sufficiently quiet & still for an entire flight? We have a long layover at ORD (Chicago); how confident should I feel about my kid not catching a virus or something if I let him play in their kid areas? We are headed to Vegas for my brother's wedding, too. So if you have any experience entertaining the under-5 set in Las Vegas, that would be useful. It's been hard to find anything about that online other than, "GAWD! Why would you take a baby to Vegas?" 
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Dec 9, 2012 19:59
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Thanks for the Vegas & travelling advice, everybody. I can't believe I hadn't even thought of how awesome the decorations will be this time of year. We had an early crawler and furniture-cruiser too, and it certainly is terrifying to watch. My advice is try not to worry about the bumps, bruises, and falls too much. It's an inevitable part of childhood, and they really do learn how to fall more safely after a bit. I've got a mom-acquaintance who is so controlling, that her kid just sits there like a lump because every time he tries to follow his curiosity, she reins him in so he'll be "safe." Don't be that parent. I'm kind of a free-range hippie anyway, but I would MUCH rather have an adventurous 7 year old kid with a broken arm who fell out of a tree than a bored, overweight kid who just sits in the basement.
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Dec 11, 2012 16:40
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Ben Davis posted:Someone posted a great link about how it helps to tell kids not to talk to tricky people instead of 'strangers.' It had a great list of key behaviors, like asking a kid for help--because no adult ever needs a little kid to help them with anything. There also some great stuff over at kidpower.org, like this: http://www.kidpower.org/library/article/safe-without-scared/. We don't just want the illusion of safety, but to give kids real life tools to actually BE more safe. For example, if the kid is alone and in an emergency situation, you DO want them to ask for help from a stranger. The vast majority of abuse isn't from a stranger - it's from a relative or someone trusted by the family. I was just reading this post (http://coreparentingpdx.com/2012/a-real-look-at-preventing-sexual-abuse/), and found the statistics surprising.
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Dec 12, 2012 01:47
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Mnemosyne posted:Any advice on how to prevent diaper blowouts? They're always up the back, not out the leg, and we have at least one a day since he started sitting up. We're doing disposables, and I've tried two brands with no difference in result. He's going to be 6 months this week, he's roughly 16lbs, and he's wearing size 2. I don't think going up a size will work because he's a very skinny baby and we're already having to fasten the diaper so tight that the tabs overlap in the center. I've heard that cloth works better, but we're just not into doing cloth. I do cloth most of the time, but Huggies overnights for nighttime, and regular Huggies or off-brand diapers for travel. It's true, I never get blowouts with the cloth, only the disposables. Could it be that his pants be too tight on the diaper, leaving too little room for expansion? I think the sitting position also encourages blow outs, though. The poop comes out fast, and there's just no where for it to go but up the back of the diaper. If you're curious about trying cloth diapers, but don't want to make a big investment yet, a diaper service often works out to be about the same price per month as buying disposables. We did that for the first few months, and once I realized I wanted to keep doing it, I bought my own stash of diapers and wash them myself.
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Dec 17, 2012 21:22
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Telling you that you're a bad mom is a lovely thing to say all on it's own, and is totally out of bounds. You're owed an apology for that BS, randomfuss. I totally agree with hepscat that it's a low blow, and it's one designed to hurt your feelings enough and to undermine your confidence in what you know is right. Personally, I think 3 weeks of junk food overload IS a big deal, and isn't something that I'd be willing to overlook in the name of family peace. I've recently and drastically changed how I eat though, so maybe that's a battle that I would take on, where other parents wouldn't. I think it's extremely important to model healthy eating, to talk about the healthy foods I like to my kid, and to make sure that he is surrounded by healthy options. I was a fat teenager and fat all through my 20s, until we moved a few years ago and made some big lifestyle changes. My husband also grew up as a fat kid. I hated being fat, and I hated myself. I hated that the rest of my family ate junk all the time, and I was still the only fat one in the family. I have years of my life with almost no photos of me because I hated the way I looked so much. Took me awhile to get things sorted out, and I hate that I wasted so much of my life hiding. My husband feels similarly, which is why we feel it's so important that we don't pass on lovely eating habits to our son. Turns out my parents were only thin-looking because they had serious underlying health problems, and my athletic brother became a lazy fatty in college. Moving to a whole new culture helped me see that the way we were eating (just a traditional Western diet) was NOT actually normal or health-promoting, despite how totally common and normal it seemed at the time. Enough about me, I guess; this isn't e/n, after all. I just know that family food culture is one of the really deep-seated things that kids absorb from their families, and it makes a difference in your life's trajectory before you even know enough to challenge or change it. It's more comfortable to ignore it than to look at it critically, and start denying ourselves delicious stuff that we want, but probably shouldn't be eating. I think the obese-MIL in question here does think that cookies everyday is a normal indulgence, and isn't a big deal. You're not a bad mom for being annoyed about the cookies, and knowing that it's a bad road to go down. You might get some traction with a "Help me encourage and model healthy eating to the kids"-angle, and I think it's worth a shot. MoCookies fucked around with this message at 16:31 on Dec 24, 2012 |
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Dec 24, 2012 16:27
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foxatee posted:Not joking at all, but I do see your point. There was an article that brought up the same point-- that the media has played a role in how parents perceive abductions, but it could also be a positive thing because people are more aware and pass that awareness on to their kids. Teaching a kid to avoid stranger abductions is all well and good, but more importantly they need to know how to draw and hold appropriate personal boundaries with ALL adults and kids. Stranger abductions are incredibly rare and gets mega-media attention. Sexual abuse by a family member or family friend is sadly, not particularly rare, and is far more likely to actually happen. It's like talking about not getting hit by trains, while glossing over the far more likely danger of being in a car accident.
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Jan 5, 2013 20:28
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car dance posted:But there will probably be regressions and annoying things that happen since s/he is going through so much growth themselves. I guess the best suggestion I had is just do what causes you the least stress -- if the baby wakes up multiple times and won't go back to sleep unless s/he's fed, feed that baby. If the baby won't sleep unless you're holding him/her, hold that baby. Eventually things will go back to normal. I totally agree with this. Good or bad, it's all temporary. I'm learning to go with the flow and not to take the bad days too personally, or as a indictment of my parenting skills. I will admit to wanting to slap people whose first question about Nolan is "Does he sleep through the night?" Sore subject around here. I can practically name the day that Nolan stopped falling to sleep on his own (as soon as he could roll over at 4 months old), and it's been a struggle to get him to sleep peacefully ever since then. Things work for a few weeks, and then it's back to the drawing board once he's over that phase and trying to find something else that works. Thank goodness for baby carriers though, they've induced many naps and helped us ease into bedtime many nights.
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Jan 23, 2013 04:58
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I traveled frequently with my baby for the first year. I love to travel, my husband hates it, and so I end up doing it solo + baby the majority of the time. We did survive (and enjoy!) the toddler-in-Las Vegas trip in December, by the way. That kid loves Vegas. I'm leaving in a month for another 2 week trip with the kiddo. It's gotten harder because he's awake for more and more of the travel time, and he's an ACTIVE kid. Travel days are exhausting for me because I spend the day trying to keep him quiet and happy, while not inconveniencing other passengers. I think I'd want to kill someone by the end of a transatlantic flight. How about a transatlantic cruise? That would get you to Europe too, and then you'd only have to fly one leg of the trip. Cruising with a toddler could be pretty fun.
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Feb 6, 2013 14:00
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me your dad posted:We bought our 17 month old a potty training toilet, and she goes crazy to use it. She'll repeat a phrase of babble that clearly ends with 'potty' and tries to go up the stairs toward the bathroom. She doesn't do anything except sit on it, and then grabs a small piece of toilet paper and tries to wipe. How about integrating the toilet into your daily routine a bit? That's what we're doing with my 18-month old sone. He sits on the potty before his bath in the evening, and also sometimes too in the middle of a diaper change when I've got his pants off anyway. He's gotten pretty reliable over the last month with actually going when he sits on the potty, but I'm not in a hurry to get him potty trained.
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May 31, 2013 14:21
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Ironsolid posted:An hour later, I saw Damien coming out of the kitchen with a 1 lb carrot in his hand. The ate the entire drat thing! After he ate the carrot, I gave him a hi five and commended him for eating a carrot instead of sneaking something else. He was very proud of himself, and daddy was VERY proud of him. Afterwards, I told him I loved him and I didn't want him to grow up to be like daddy. I think this interaction is something worth giving more thought to, especially what messages about food and love you may be unintentionally sending. The way you describe this makes it sound like your kiddo may be getting the message that your love and acceptance is conditional; specifically that it's dependent on him eating certain foods (and he's making sure you see it, and not seeing him eat junk food). There's a book that I highly recommend, "Unconditional Parenting" by Alfie Kohn. It might give you some insight about kids' internal motivation - it was a real eye-opener for me.
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Jun 10, 2013 21:48
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frenchnewwave posted:At 7 months (today!), how much "solid food" should my daughter be eating -- by which I mean fruit/veggie puree and cereal? She gets plenty of breastmilk and/or formula, and I've been pretty lax about the food thing. I'll give her a serving for "dinner" every other day or so. I think it's probably time that I get more regular with it. Is once a day right, or twice a day? She's had oatmeal and some veggies and she loves it, so I know she's ready. I don't want to discourage her from breastfeeding, though. Sounds like you're doing great. Breastmilk is pretty much the best nutrition you can possibly give her, and the fat content is particularly important. Very few solid foods come anywhere close to giving her the calories and healthy fats she needs. I can't remember where I first heard the adage about solid food for babies, but it's, "Under one, it's just for fun." Here's a helpful link about calories & fat for various foods: http://kellymom.com/nutrition/starting-solids/babyfoodcalories/ One of the best things I think we did with Nolan and food is serving him stuff with herbs and spices, and plenty of foods with strong flavors (olives, peppers, etc). He very rarely does the picky toddler eating thing, and loves pretty much anything you give him. Picky eaters kinda make me nuts, so I'm glad it's worked out that way.
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Jun 17, 2013 19:58
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I'm a babywearing nerd. The Beco Butterfly II got phased out in favor of the new Soleil. You should be able to find a BBII for sale on one of the babywearing swap groups or on thebabywearer.com forums, though. Which I got to demo the Soleil not that long ago, and I think it's really one of the best designed buckle carriers available. I recommend it over the Ergo, for sure. Boba and Tula are good brands of buckle carriers as well, if you see something there you like better. We had a BBII until my son outgrew it though; my husband liked that internal harness feature, which isn't a common thing. The important thing to know is that floppy newborns and babies need structure in a carrier, or they just slump down, and then their airway is at risk. Buckle carriers, even with the infant inserts and whatnot, won't fit all that well until the baby can hold their torso up by themselves. The carrier just can't be adjusted and secured all that much. That's why wrap-style carriers and ring slings are the better until about the 4-month point. The buckle carriers try to accommodate parents that want just the one carrier, but it's not ideal. You're right that there's a learning curve, and I can appreciate that you don't even want to mess with it. If heat is an issue, stay away from the stretchy wraps, including the k'tan. They're all so drat thick and hot, and they're kind of a waste of money because they get saggy with a baby heavier than 15 pounds. The only exception is the Wrapsody stretch hybrid wrap, which I'm nuts about. It feels like a well-worn thin t-shirt, but isn't hot, and doesn't get saggy until at least 20 pounds. I have a lot of carriers, some of them fairly pricy too, and I still use the Wrapsody regularly. If money's not an object, you could get a full-buckle wrap conversion made from a linen wrap. That would be in the category of coveted specialty item, but one of the gals in the local babywearing group would know how to help you track one down or get one made especially for you.
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Aug 29, 2013 03:50
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