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Ohhhhhh, I've wanted to vent about this one for a while!!! So, I was really good friends in high school with a girl named "Brenda". We lost touch when we went to college, and I found & friended her on Facebook about a year ago. I haven't gotten together with her in person, but her FB posts tell me that she's had a rough time. Her posts for the last year are pretty much all about her money woes: She & her husband have a very limited income and one of their children has special needs (Aspergers). She's tried to get government assistance but didn't qualify. They live in a rental house where everything is falling apart and they can't afford to move or fix anything on their own. Their car is almost dead, and they don't know how they can replace it. Finally, a couple of weeks ago, her husband was diagnosed with cancer - it sounds like a treatable, usually non-fatal type, but still. So, last week, their family got some kind of windfall. She posted: "We have had a huge shift (for us) in our finances and I am still stunned. I can't believe it is real and happening! It means we can pay for boys' school and they can go to camp this summer and maybe even a vacation! We're not millionaires but the amount for us is so great that it raises our ability to manage so much that it feels like we are to us." And a couple of days later, she posted asking if $4100 for a 7-day, 6-night Disney vacation was a good deal. Yes, her plan was to blow a large chunk of cash, and drag her husband, who has CANCER and all the kids to Disney for a week - next week. Like, not even to plan it out a few weeks in advance to pay a little less on airfare, or anything. I don't think that included food for 5 people. I tried to be diplomatic, and suggested that while it's nobody else's business how she spends her money, with so much uncertainty in her life right now, it might be better to stash that money and plan a great trip over Christmas or something. She deleted the whole conversation, so who knows what they decided. But seriously - with his incoming medical bills/missed work/car repairs/house issues/kids' various needs/you name it - planning a trip to a super overpriced theme park??? In Florida, in the hottest time of year? Then yesterday, she was complaining about working "2 part time jobs and 1 very part time job and taking care of a sick husband" and how tired she was. You know what? Why not stick that 4k in the bank, quit one of the jobs, and portion that money out to cover the difference for a few months? I mean, I'm glad that her family got some kind of a boost, but it sickens me that they are given a chance to really improve things, and they don't look further than this summer.
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Jun 22, 2013 01:54
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oxsnard posted:Just wanted to thank this thread for recommending Queen of Versailles. Incredible film. It was weird hating that woman and sort of pitying/admiring her in some way at the same time I felt the same way about both her and the husband, with the way he was trying to keep it all afloat when everyone was telling him to just let it go. And the crazy thing is, it sounds like it worked: http://video.cnbc.com/gallery/?play=1&video=30001752694 Ok, end of movie derail.
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Jul 13, 2013 00:08
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April posted:Ohhhhhh, I've wanted to vent about this one for a while!!! An update to this one: They went to Disney, and her husband was in the ER within a day or 2 of returning. They are now driving all over, staying in hotels, buying costumes, eating out, etc. so that the daughter can compete in pageants. The only thing I can think is maybe her husband is actually dying, and they aren't telling anyone, but doing everything on their bucket list right now. The alternative (that they really are that stupid with their finances/don't really care about the impact of loving CANCER on every aspect of their lives) is just too depressing.
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Jul 28, 2013 14:25
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Harry posted:Really if he has cancer, using a large windfall to pay for any part of it would most likely be throwing it into the abyss unless we're talking millions here. It's not so much that they could/should use it to pay medical bills, but there are so many related expenses. Like, if one or both of them has to miss work while he is undergoing treatment, they will have less income, but they will still need gas, groceries, and so on. It just seems like they are making the absolute worst decisions. "Hey, we are in dire financial straits and the main provider is facing a major health crisis, and our special needs child requires expensive schooling and our car is dying and our house is falling apart around us... whoa! we got some money! Let's take a vacation!" For content: quote:Applicant’s statement of reasons alleges six delinquent debts, totaling $565,178. Applicant did not file state income tax returns for 2002 and 2005 through 2011 when required by law. He did not make sufficient progress resolving his delinquent debts. Financial considerations are not mitigated. Eligibility for access to classified information is denied. CASE NO: 12-10691.h1 Over half a million dollars... it's mind-boggling to me that some of these people even apply for clearance. Surely, they have to know they are going to be denied.
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Jul 28, 2013 17:53
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reflex posted:Tell your wife to get a job because marriage is a team sport, she's sitting on the bench, and you're both losing because of it. Somehow, I don't think that will work. Socialized, please start a thread, it sounds like you guys really need some help, and BFC loves a success story. Just be prepared for your wife to be compared to zaurg's. Content: One of my husband's friends was at our house recently, complaining about how much his monthly bills are. He is recently divorced, and one of the things he got stuck with was a monthly bill for laptops he & his now-ex-wife bought about 3 years ago. They financed them through Dell and the monthly payment was $45. I guess before she left, she quit paying the bill, and he got hit with various penalties and so on and now his monthly payment is $80. I'm not sure what he still owes, but he said he figured out that he'll be able to get it paid off, at $80/month, in about 2 years. Three years after the original purchase!! I told him to call the finance company, explain the circumstances (namely that his ex created this problem & left him holding the bag), and that they could maybe lower his interest rate or give him a temporary deferral or something. He couldn't be bothered. He also co-signed for his daughter's $70,000 in student loans for culinary school, and was fine with it when she dropped out 3 months before graduation. He's now making the payments for her since she can't find a good job. I asked him why not see if she would qualify for a forbearance or deferral, he didn't seem interested. I just don't understand this totally passive mindset. I know where he works, and I know how hard he works for what he earns, and the fact that he's totally ok with just paying for everyone else's bad decisions, probably for the rest of his life, is cool with him. Cause phone calls are hard, you know?
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Aug 15, 2013 18:53
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IllIllIll posted:Gotta say, this thread makes me feel so much better about my student loan situation. However, it did make me realize that my credit card rate is 21%. I haven't noticed because until last month I've never carried a balance and therefore never paid a cent in interest. How did I get stuck with 21%? It's not the penalty rate, thats motherfucking 30%. Try peer-to-peer lending, it IS fun. [/derail] For content: My sister ("Jane") was married to a guy I'll call Jim. Jane and Jim bought a really great old Victorian home for a pretty low price, and spent thousands and thousands of dollars remodeling it and making it even better. They had a baby together, and got divorced when my nephew was 4 months old. Shortly after that, they hooked up, she got pregnant again, and also got the nice big house in the divorce. They stayed separated (DRAMA), but she didn't want to live in the house, so she rented half of a duplex and put the house on the market. It took quite a while to sell, so she was paying the mortgage AND her rental. Finally, she sold it on a land contract, and started making plans to build a new house. She also started dating a new guy "Mark". Mark has his own house that he is paying on. The people buying Jane's house defaulted on the payments, so the Victorian is back to Jane, complete with mortgage. She is still renting & living in the duplex. And now, she and Mark are building brand-new a 400k+ dream house. This brings the total to 3 houses and one small apartment. She is living in the apartment with her two kids, and they are paying for all four residences. Because she wants the big house in the prestigious neighborhood, she hired the cheapest contractor, who, after about 8 months, still hasn't even broken ground. Did I mention that the rental on the apartment is more than the mortgage on the Victorian? Throw in financing a new SUV every couple of years (last one was a BMW), 30k+ in student loan debt, credit cards for every store, and yeah. Bad with money.
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Dec 26, 2013 14:18
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RE: new car chat. I am planning to buy my first-ever brand new car in spring of 2016. My husband and I have a deal. Because I am the one who handles the money in our house, if I can manage to get us 100% out of debt (including the 30-year mortgage) in a time frame that will save us a large chunk of money, he does not mind if I get a brand new car. I have run the numbers a thousand times, and it looks like everything, including the mortgage, will be paid off in December of 2015. For reference, when we bought the house in December of 2006, our total debt load was $176,532, and we had $25 in savings. (Notice how close to 2008 it was? yeah.) Now, our total debt is $77,113, and we have almost $60,000 in various savings and investment accounts. If we stay on track, we are going to save over $150,000 on the mortgage alone. Right now, I am driving a 2006 Envoy that we bought with cash last August that has about 120k miles on it. I plan to give it to my daughter when/if I get a new one. I am looking at a small Nissan SUV, which I'll then drive till it dies. I should add - my husband is a BIG-TIME car guy who can fix just about anything, and has limped our used vehicles along for years past their expiration date. He is currently driving a 2005 Silverado with 220k miles on it, both of our cars run great. However, it does seem like we make a lot of repairs. So... if I plan to buy a brand-new vehicle (with cash or a <2% loan - our credit score is in the 800-ish range, and we will most likely pay it of within a year), and to keep it and lovingly maintain it for probably a decade or so, am I bad with money? My reasons aren't entirely the shiny paint or new car smell, but rather, a nice warranty, knowing how it's been driven and maintained, and to have a vehicle that I CAN keep for more than 5 years.
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Feb 27, 2014 20:00
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Cicero posted:Look, the optimal path for basically any financial decision is, "If need -> go as cheap as possible, If want -> avoid". But all work and no play makes Jane a dull girl, nobody avoids splurging on everything. If you have plenty of savings and a paid-off house (that's huge!) then dumping money on a luxury, even a big one, makes you far from bad with money. I mean, if you're aiming for early retirement or some other aggressive financial goal, then you should probably avoid it, but otherwise that sounds fine. Well, we are aiming to retire before 65 as well, but we make decent money, so we should be able to do both. Plus, I'm looking at it as one big purchase to cover 10 years or so, instead of buying another heavily-used vehicle every couple of years, and paying for repairs right off the bat. But I think that paying off a 30-year mortgage in 9 years is something worth celebrating in a big way as well 
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Feb 27, 2014 20:24
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dreesemonkey posted:If you can fit it into your budget while still meeting your already healthy financial goals, it's not the worst idea ever. Haha, close, I've actually been drooling over the Juke (SV model). It looks like they are changing the design next year though, and I don't like it as much, so still shopping around. Thanks for the info!!
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Feb 27, 2014 21:43
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Jeffrey posted:^^^ Aren't there ways you can get a manufacturer's warranty on a used car if it is new enough? If that's true I still think you'd be strictly better off getting a one year old car. I don't think I'd personally celebrate getting out of debt by taking on a bunch more, but congrats on potentially getting your mortgage off your back! Sorry I didn't respond to this sooner. We've kicked it around, and our general thought is that you never can REALLY know how a used car was treated, and just once, it would be nice to not have to deal with whatever the previous owner did to it. And like I said, we might pay cash for it, or get a loan as close to 0% as possible for whatever we don't pay up front, and pay it off as fast as we can. And my intention is to keep whatever we get until it falls apart around me, not to get into the "I need a new car every X years" mindset. If I keep the husband around, we can conceivably get 200k+ miles out of it.
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Feb 27, 2014 22:20
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Anne Whateley posted:Agarjogger's posts in the e/n dating thread aren't financial, but they sure are something too. I tried reading, but the online dating thread alone has 10 pages of his posts, and as a non-dater, I can't slog through it. Any samples?
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Jul 27, 2014 12:52
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Thesaurus posted:You forgot the part where his kid is going to be born within in a week and he's also simultaneously moving several hours away for a place that costs twice as much at the same time with no job lined up and zero savings because.... ? Because duh, issues with dishes. And self-esteem. I've read this thread since the beginning, and this is one of the first posts that has made me actively want to yell and curse at my monitor. There are a lot of people who are bad with money, but that level of intentional loving idiocy, with a baby on the way, is drat near unforgivable.
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Mar 23, 2015 18:53
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Chuch posted:What I found interesting is that the two poorest states by median income (West Virginia and Mississippi) are near the top in car spending. As a lifelong resident of West Virginia, I can attest to this.
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Mar 31, 2015 13:10
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Radbot posted:The real question is, where can you buy a habitable home with more than 1 job in a 100 mile radius for $50k? Where I live is considered rural/Midwest/Bumfuck, but I am only 45 minutes from a major city. You can get a pretty decent place for 60-70k here, and still have the advantages (good jobs, entertainment, etc.) if you're willing to drive a little bit for it. But this is probably going to be another rural/city debate, so I'll leave it at that.
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Apr 23, 2015 15:28
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Rudager posted:I'm not the most social of people, but you'd be surprised how quickly you fill 177 seats when you invite all your extended family on both sides (with their +1's), both of your friends (more +1's), and then your close family will ask you to invite people (again, with their +1's). But if you're sending out 177 invitations, wouldn't each invitation include a +1 or +family? So it's possible it's closer to 300-400 people, if I'm reading that right.
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Jul 17, 2015 12:42
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High Lord Elbow posted:"Hey you should buy this managed fund..." "you know, I have this managed fund that does really well, but most people aren't smart enough to see the potential. But since you're a doctor and far more educated, you might appreciate this..." Easy.
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Jul 9, 2016 21:24
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Oh Reddit... This is a perfect firestorm of BWM and BWL. On the plus side, the guy realizes he's way behind and wants to catch up, but seriously, how did he not notice in, like, high school that his friends were getting jobs and drivers' licenses and whatnot? https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/5armri/had_a_really_sheltered_life_dont_know_what_to_do/?st=iv1fy8zq&sh=a1952cb4 quote:Quick backstory. In Nevada. Grew up less than middle class but not exactly poor enough to ever qualify for welfare but wealthy enough to be even low end middle class. Mother and father always said they would provide, kept me in the home, never allowed to have a job, drive, never said my bad eating habits were bad, etc. Far as I knew my room was my world.
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Nov 2, 2016 22:36
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Haifisch posted:He didn't notice because of severe helicopter parenting. Dude was raised to be a shut in - he probably didn't have friends. I'm wondering if he might be slightly autistic, or mentally disabled in some way. I mean, wouldn't he, at some point, have wanted to get laid or something? I understand overprotective parents, but it seems like most normal kids with that kind of home life either rebel pretty openly, or find ways to sneak around mom & dad's rules. Also curious about the "millions" dad had.
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Nov 2, 2016 23:35
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Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:Just posting the titles: Can you pretty please post the link to this one?
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Dec 19, 2016 23:41
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I've seen this referenced many times, but I have never seen the full story, and I suspect it is hilarious/horrifying. Can someone point me in a direction?
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Dec 21, 2016 12:08
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This isn't reddit, but checks a significant number of BWM/BWL checkboxes. These geniuses get pulled over for acting like dumbasses, "feared for their lives" and decided to file a complaint at the police station - while fully armed & wearing sunglasses & balaclavas. Needless to say, the police did not respond favorably. The cherry on the batshit sundae, however, is this:quote:On his Facebook page, Baker said he is “currently facing three misdemeanor charges [and] had $4k in property stolen.” The Detroit Free Press reported his charges as breaching the peace, failure to cooperate with police and masking his identity by obscuring his face in the station. ETA: forgot the link like a heavily armed dumbass: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news...daily202&wpmm=1 April fucked around with this message at 16:24 on Feb 11, 2017 |
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Feb 11, 2017 16:18
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silicone thrills posted:What's the problem with just going to the jewelry store together - picking something out together that she likes - and then doing a romantic proposal later? What my husband & I did is go shopping together, where I picked a few different rings that I really liked. I think there were 3-4. Then he picked one of them, and proposed. I still got to be surprised, he didn't have to worry I wasn't going to like it. 15 years later, still wearing the set. Problem solved!
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Mar 14, 2017 11:16
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So does anyone want BWM stories, or should we all just keep going on about masters degrees? Asking for a friend. https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/63454y/us_gambling_debt_student_loans_seriously/?st=j12qpe3d&sh=3bb6365d quote:Hello, I am a mid 20's male who is living in Las Vegas, NV. Earlier last year, I took out 20 credit cards and used the cash advances to gamble; when the cash advance limits are met, I bought gold on eBay, sold them to pawn shops and used the money to gamble.
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Apr 4, 2017 00:25
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