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Thanks Ants posted:What does he do when his home broadband router detects a ping? Shut. Down. Everything.
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Jul 22, 2014 09:56
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A Latitude 6440 or 7440 if you want some style should easily do any i7 and 16GB of ram in a portable package. The 7440 will also give you a 14" full HD display if you feel like it.
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Aug 26, 2014 07:46
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The Muffinlord posted:Wait, your IT guys are unionized?! We live in socialist Scandinavia hell, and not in the land of infinite freedom.
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Sep 8, 2014 14:17
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I know the ignorance of users is low hanging fruit in this thread, but I'm getting kinda tired of hearing from them "I spilled water on my phone and now it's not working. Do you know anything about it? Is this a common problem? It was just a little splash of water and not a big one, does that help? Is there anything you can try? Is there anything you can do?"
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Sep 24, 2014 13:54
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Another user ripped a Dell Latitude E6420 out of a locked docking station. If you have one at hand, look at how thick the metal is where the dock latches on.
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Oct 7, 2014 08:09
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The only issues we have are occasional but not excessive hardware failures and users needing a little help with the initial setup of displays and reminding them to power their laptop on with the lid closed. It really sounds like you have a user issue, not a docking station issue.
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Oct 7, 2014 09:43
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HalloKitty posted:Lately? I thought HP laptops have been poo poo for some time. Maybe that was just the consumer class ones. All consumer laptops are poo poo quality. They all come from the same factories, just different logos on the lid.
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Oct 7, 2014 12:02
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I am the only one in my department who has the guts to say "I will not help you via Lync, send an email to helpdesk@company.com" when someone tries to contact me on Lync. All my coworkers are crying to our manager because they are constantly flooded with Lync chat windows, and they don't know how to say "no". Also, repeat offenders get blocked.
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Oct 27, 2014 08:34
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Subnet 
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Nov 20, 2014 11:11
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Our Lync 2013 setup has been pretty great, and it even integrates well with our Cisco/Tandberg video rooms and IP telephony. The only real issues we have are when people are trying to do stuff that is theoretically possible but ridiculous, such as using their iPad on the other side of the world to run a Citrix desktop on servers here with us, and trying to video call from that Citrix session.
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Nov 24, 2014 08:22
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I have a microphone on my phone, into which I can say the word "no".
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Nov 27, 2014 15:03
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Entropic posted:A laptop came in... That looks like a Dell D610 or D600 or something related from the pre-D620 era. Why the hell is it still alive and being used??
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Nov 27, 2014 18:44
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I too am helpdesk with added responsibilities. I've previously worked my way up in call centers to have the warranty costs of 8 callcenters and 1100 agents under me, and I have also worked with 2nd line ADSL setup, configuration and troubleshooting. The first job was 95% office politics with people and 5% meetings and powerpoints. The second one was 100% technology and no people. I didn't like any of them. Right now I plug in network cables, image up laptops, train and support our 1st line helpdesk in the Philippines which I have gotten to visit twice, I've also been to the Netherlands and taken a helicopter to an offshore oilrig to eat shittons of bacon and chocolate pudding while I install Windows 7 for them. I get to play and learn with tons of technology and gadgets, each year for the last 5 I make more money than I ever have, I get to deal with mostly grown up coworkers and users who know that poo poo breaks and are thankful when I fix it. We're a small inhouse shop, so there is no possibility for advancement here, but right now I'm as happy as I've ever been with any job I've had in IT.
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Dec 5, 2014 08:31
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Taping over the webcam is one of the most human actions there are when it comes to how people view computers and privacy. If I want to spy on you I would use a keylogger, a screendumper, network traffic sniffing or turn on the microphone on your PC to listen to what you are talking about in the room. Of all the ways to spy on you and see what you are doing, the webcam is the absolutely least interesting.
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Dec 8, 2014 10:14
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moosepoop posted:A ticket came in: Reseating a dimm on a server, again... How about replace the dimm? Or don't use that slot on the server?
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Dec 10, 2014 14:16
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Japanese Dating Sim posted:Have you guys ever seen a bad SAS cable cause intermittent problems on a system? I'm running out of possibilities for what's causing this super expensive T7600 to boot unreliably and/or fail outright if it has more than 2 drives plugged into it, given that we've replaced the motherboard (and by doing so, the on-board C600 SAS RAID controller). It's still in warranty. Call Dell. Stay on the phone until it is fixed.
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Dec 12, 2014 08:01
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What came in today: AN OFFICE PUPPY!!!!   
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Dec 19, 2014 12:37
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Crowley posted:Start of a ticket.. Sounds exactly like when I supported a bunch of primary schools where they had accidental coverage on the laptops. "Laptop accidentally hit by soccer ball (laptop was being used as goalpost)" All you could do was sigh deeply and order up the parts.
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Jan 6, 2015 14:39
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No, we do not have a trailer you can borrow. We're IT, not IKEA or a gas station.
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Jan 8, 2015 13:57
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Coredump posted:Pfft. What are these "policies" and "procedures" you speak of. poo poo that actually happened today, on a Friday, after lunchtime: "Hi, we're a bunch of salty oily old offshore roughnecks who have worked on oilrigs all our lives with no finer tool than a 15" wrench and hammer. We start working in an office in London on Monday and we need some of those lappetitoppies and something called an veeeee peeeee ennnn. No our managers aren't available to make or approve the requests, they just said to go to IT and you would fix that poo poo for us".
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Jan 16, 2015 14:11
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"Hi, I quit this company months ago, but I need to log into my email so that I can get a copy of the emails about my sons handball team"
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Jan 16, 2015 15:14
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User: Hi, my laptop screen is broken (Notice "My laptop screen is broken", not "I broke my laptop screen") Me: Bring it to IT User: But it's really broken, you have to press on the sides to even get a warbled picture Me: Bring it to IT User: See attached picture of how broken it really is. Me: Bring it to IT So far, no laptop at IT, and no reply.
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Jan 19, 2015 12:04
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nitrogen posted:In before user complains about how unhelpful you are, and you are told to go pick it up I didn't even consider this possibility. Now I know that it is how this is going to end 
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Jan 19, 2015 14:43
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evobatman posted:Bring it to IT Well, it got brought to IT. Big dark finger mark in the edge of the classic broken LCD pattern. All rubber feet missing. Screws missing. Touchpad buttons missing. Dust and hair all over the inside. The user of course, has no idea what has happened, when it has happened, why it has happened and so on, even when I point out the big fingermark. "No it's regular wear and tear". I would like to say that I made him sweat with my questioning, but he's really so disconnected from the concept of having any conscience about treating his equipment like this, it's like trying to tell a fish to treat his bicycle better. End result: New LCD, new LCD bezel, new palmrest, new keyboard, new hard drive, new RAM, new bottom plate, all taken from a similar one with a broken motherboard, both out of warranty. It's the laptop of Theseus now. At least it's just a 4 year old Latitude 6320, and not something new.
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Jan 20, 2015 10:56
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Daylen Drazzi posted:mom. wireless. printer. Three words that should never the loving gently caress ever be in the same week, let alone the same sentence! Why would you do something like that to yourself??
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Jan 21, 2015 11:50
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BabyFur Denny posted:One employee cannot wreck the median skill level, that is not how the median works. You probably just worked at a company that can't even get basic mathematics right! We want all our employees to have above average metrics. Make it happen or forfeit your bonus, your job and your firstborn.
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Jan 26, 2015 11:49
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God damnit tier 1, please at least pretend to know what you are doing! "Can we install autorun.exe?"
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Jan 29, 2015 13:23
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myron cope posted:A ticket came in today... Office 2013 will work after installed... Until the pc is rebooted. Then no applications will load until a re-install (or online repair, which is basically a re-install). We use office 365. The error is useless (I think it's "something went wrong" and mentioning that the requested program couldn't be started). I tried basically everything I could think of or find in a Google search. I ran windows updates, ccleaner, malware scans, the .net repair tool, sfc /scannow. I used the office uninstall tool to remove office. Replace harddrive with SSD if it isn't already done, re-image the PC with the deployment tools you should already have created. Here's a hint: If event viewer won't load, that's a sign that something is very very wrong with the computer. Most likely a broken harddrive.
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Feb 3, 2015 08:25
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Is it like they had in Sweden where you get basically a scratch lottery ticket with codes? Or in Norway, where you get a letter sent to your census registered address with pin codes in it?
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Feb 9, 2015 14:18
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Our users are pretty good at managing to change their old password to a new one. Then it's just up to IT to hunt down their work laptop, home laptop, iPad, iPhone, extra Exchange app on the iPad, iMac Calendar app, hanging Citrix session and the 5 conference room machines where they logged on last week and just walked away from that keep locking them out every 5 seconds.
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Feb 24, 2015 08:04
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HP had an ad a few years back where they promised the most dollars per gigabyte in the industry.
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Mar 11, 2015 07:55
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Turn toward him, continue conversation as usual. Do not tuck in penis, zip up pants or stop peeing.
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Apr 9, 2015 12:07
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Assholes, idiots and morons, that's what I have to deal with. All desktops of all models that are brought in and connected in a single specific one of our dozens of video rooms fail to boot. All desktops inside and outside all our other video rooms work perfectly fine. "We must test more desktops in this room! What are the capabilities of the desktops used in this room? Can you try a few more desktops in this room?" These are the questions I get AFTER I point out that "Hey, maybe you fuckers should take a look at the video conference equipment in this room?" This is a case that has taken WEEKS because nobody will admit that the video equipment might be faulty.
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Apr 15, 2015 13:39
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evobatman posted:Assholes, idiots and morons, that's what I have to deal with. And I just had to repeat this again because  WE MUST TRY MORE COMPUTERS! THERE MUST BE SOMETHING WRONG WITH THE COMPUTERS The problem isn't that I have to explain the basic logic of troubleshooting or even pointing out what the problem is or isn't, it's that I have to repeat myself to people in more senior position over and over and over again without being heard - them being the ones coming to me to ask about this!
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Apr 16, 2015 07:57
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My ticket queue right now: Waterdamaged iPhone Smashed iPhone Dead iPhone
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Apr 23, 2015 13:59
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 Sorry about your stroke.
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May 7, 2015 10:31
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Crowley posted:What is a private logon any way? We use job-related logons for rotating shift positions (Assistant Driller is assdriller@company.com), but all employees also have their own logon for webmail and timesheets and such, so he is probably referring to that. There is of course also the VPN client, intranet portal, Citrix portal etc etc etc, all which can be a little much to keep track of for someone who has spent the last 40 years working on heavy machinery in the North Sea.
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May 7, 2015 12:14
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Neito posted:I love when people say stuff like "Always something new!" or "You guys are always changing things!". With referral to the previously mentioned assdrillers, I'm guessing that everything in the North Sea has been the same for the last 40 years, because anything new is a scary inconvenient cause for panic, swearing and complaining. Doesn't matter what it is, if it is a logon screen, new laptop with exact same OS, software and image, widescreen instead of 4:3, desk phone and on and on and on. If it's changed to new, it's inconceivable, scary and bad, and the way they have been doing things for the last 40 years is the correct one. We have also had people working here for over 20 years without ever seeing the intranet webpage or creating a helpdesk ticket. They think they are still rogue pioneer roughnecks building the country piece by piece, and not pawns in a multinational Big Oil corporation. evobatman fucked around with this message at 13:50 on May 7, 2015 |
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May 7, 2015 13:47
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Sorry about YOUR stroke!
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May 8, 2015 11:58
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RE: USB chat on the previous page, business model computers will let you enable or disable groups front and rear USB ports in the BIOS, and that can usually be manipulated via a Windows app that can be remotely launched (Dell Command/CCTK). Or you can tell whoever asked for this feature that they are crazy and it will never work.
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May 18, 2015 10:36
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