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For a while we had two identical Nissan sedans, the only difference being the color. My daughter only rode in the blue one because that was the one that had been set up for kids, so we'd say "time to get in the blue car!" whenever we had to go someplace. Eventually we replaced the not-blue car with a van, but we kept the habit of calling the sedan the blue car for a little while. Cue my daughter thinking all sedans--regardless of color, make or model--are "blue cars." "Look at that blue car!" "It's red, baby girl." "You're right! A red blue car!" For no reason we can fathom she decided the van was a "monster backpack" which I think is pretty awesome.
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Nov 20, 2013 03:31
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So Math posted:Years ago, my mom got some Victoria's Secret for her birthday. Cue my kid sister: Ha! That reminds me of my cousin. She got caught using the word "poo poo" as a girl and her mother found out. She was severely scolded and her mother told her to use the word "cathair" instead. Cue a lot of confused looks when a Bunsen burner makes a huge fireball in her chem lab one day and she blurts out "cathair!" at the top of her lungs in front of her classmates.
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Nov 20, 2013 14:38
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"Oh, that's for your happies."
"What."
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I'm dancing with my son. My daughter objects, "No dancing. EVIL dancing!" I ask her to do an evil dance and she starts doing the Robot.
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Mar 8, 2014 17:01
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My one year old is smiling, and my daughter says, "He's not happy. He's EVIL happy!"
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Jun 15, 2014 16:21
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My son saw a Thunderbird and said, "I think that's a shar-pei!" "Do you mean 'Chevrolet?'" "Yeah!" I mean, wrong either way, but at least one makes more sense. marshmallow creep has a new favorite as of 22:27 on Mar 14, 2019 |
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Mar 14, 2019 22:24
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Are halal sausages beef or what?
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Apr 12, 2019 16:23
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My eldest son complaining about his little brother on a long car ride: "His eyes are talking!"
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Jun 10, 2019 00:48
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"Playing with strangers are illegal."
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Jun 20, 2019 23:17
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I don't recognize myself if i shave.
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Jun 24, 2019 19:04
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My wife and I were talking about that video of a guy kicking a black bear, so we asked our son, "Is it smart to kick a bear?" "No. It's not September!"
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Jul 23, 2019 02:14
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Me: "You need to go brush your hair." My autistic 6 year old: "I can't! I don't have a head!" He continues to insist he left his head at school.
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Nov 28, 2019 18:04
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"The sun is deleted! Time for bed!"
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Feb 6, 2020 22:36
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"Metal spikes will slow you down."
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Apr 17, 2020 22:54
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"I drink apple juice all the time because it's beer for kids!"
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Apr 30, 2020 22:30
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"Eyelashes always betray us."
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May 7, 2020 21:05
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Alhazred posted:Today the kids played shop. Their shop sold babies and pink milkshake. Do they deliver? My eldest son has said repeatedly that he wants us to buy a baby since his little brother is too old now.
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May 28, 2020 17:24
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Moral of the story: Doctor was a man...named HOOK!
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Jul 2, 2020 17:39
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left_unattended posted:Had a memory come up on Facebook recently about the social media generation discovering magic eye pictures, and some little poo poo commented, "my Dad has a whole book of these!" I could feel the grey hairs growing. I'm only loving 32. That's about when I got my first grey hair. Welcome to old.
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Aug 26, 2020 14:54
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My youngest has been watching science programs. "What is density?" "Well, you are shorter than your brother, but you're heavier, so you're more dense." "Oh, so THAT'S why I'm afraid of water!"
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Aug 28, 2020 01:38
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My 8 year old autistic son got into his mom's nail polish to paint his fingernails. Me: "Do you have permission?" Him: "I have infinite permission."
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Nov 28, 2020 23:23
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"Jupiter is my favorite planet. I love its secrets." "What kind of secrets?" "The biggest." I think my son is conspiring with Jupiter.
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Jan 23, 2021 00:49
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My son is nine, and learning what he likes about girls and how to express his attractions. "When I see her butt, it gives me butt anxiety." "Butt anxiety?" "Yeah, it makes my penis fly away."
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Jan 29, 2021 03:56
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Megaman's Jockstrap posted:My son was mad about a family situation. I asked him if he wanted to talk about it and he replied "dad, when I'm like this.... Your voice sounds like a toilet flushing". From one dad to another: "lol owned" Your son sounds very mature and honest though. I suspect good parenting. marshmallow creep has a new favorite as of 15:45 on Mar 6, 2021 |
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Mar 6, 2021 15:43
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My wife, laughing so hard she pulled something. Me: "We better not make momma laugh anymore or she's gonna die." My son, no hesitation: "Knock, knock!"
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Mar 19, 2021 18:03
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| # ¿ May 3, 2024 01:26 |
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Beachcomber posted:Stolen from the Blessed Pictures thread. When I first saw this, I thought it was a kid who didn't understand the structure of a joke. But then I turned on the sound and no, he absolutely does.
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Mar 18, 2023 19:19
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