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my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
So, who's going to organize the bets for the next big "HEGEL vs Rodrigo Diaz" fight?

Serious question: What's the most effective shield shape?

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my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
Amazing effortpost Ensign Expendable. However,

Ensign Expendable posted:

Recalling your high school physics, the kinetic energy of an object increases linearly with its speed, but quadratically with its mass. It is twice as hard to make a shell go twice as fast, but four times as hard to launch a shell with twice the weight at the same speed.

Ek=mV2/2

:spergin: There might be a slight error here.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

InspectorBloor posted:

Has anyone here read more about ottoman tactics? I just found a few journal articles that touch the subject and a few books. Some guy at my uni wrote his MT about that. I'll order it and see if it's any good.

I've heard good things about the Memoirs of a Janissary. Apparently, the whole point of the book is giving the enemies of the Ottoman Empire an idea about how Ottoman tactics and politics worked. - Not having read the book myself, I can't guarantee its quality, though.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
What do you guys think about "The Crusades Through Arab Eyes" by Amin Maalouf? Is it worth reading?

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Funny coincidence, I was listening to Van Canto when I clicked that link, and the verse "Building a fortress around my heart" played just as I realized what I was looking at.

edit: It took me a while to reply because I was laughing my rear end off. (At the coincidence, not the tattoo. The tattoo rocks.)

my dad fucked around with this message at 23:54 on Dec 28, 2013

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

a travelling HEGEL posted:

It's also what all of them use to speak to people they don't know. A few weeks ago in a hostel some women came in speaking...something. It sounded almost Slavic, but it was German I think? Then one of them turned to me and, in accentless Standard German, said "Do you mind if I open a window?" I said fine, and they went back to...whatever it was they were doing.

It might have been Sorbian which is a Slavic language, or the women might have been from around Lower Lusatsia - the dialect there was heavily influenced by Sorbs.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

a travelling HEGEL posted:

Was this because of his injuries, or was he rendered mute through mental stress?

One of my great-uncles was attacked by a bear when he was a teen, and even though he somehow avoided getting seriously injured, he was so terrified by it that he had to learn how to speak again - I wouldn't be surprised if Niccolo experienced the same thing.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

a travelling HEGEL posted:

Face and head; his skull was layed open to the brain. To persuade his parents to give you their money. But his family had none.

Holy poo poo. :stare:

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

gfanikf posted:

Been listening to Max Hastings Catastrophe 1914 for the past two days. Very good so far. I got Hastings Inferno for 5 bucks on audible (still that price), but I've been listing to Beevors book for a Second World War narrative at the moment. I do like Hastings writing style, its opinionated, but I think that's a plus (especially his disdain for the Austro-Hungarian leadership, which is quite humorous), so I might give Inferno a listen too, at the least I'm interested in what his Churchill book will be like.

A lot of AH leaders really were complete idiots. Austria-Hungary attacked Serbia - a tiny, poor, war-exhausted country, using superior numbers, better weapons, the advantage of being able to choose where and when to fight, AND LOST. TWICE.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

maev posted:

Getting slightly into Tom Clancy territory here, but it's pretty pertinent to military history. How able was the Warsaw pacts military situation in the 1980s? Would it have actually been able to Red Hammer NATO into dust if it had invaded? How did it square up to NATO technologically and strategically?
My Dad was in the British coldstream guards in Germany during the 1970s, and said that the doctrine was something like running away continually until the Americans/nukes came, so I'm interested in hearing more from people who are more in the know than I am in the subject.

Keep running.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Arquinsiel posted:

You're completely forgetting about VTOL aircraft like the V-22 Osprey and ignoring ground-attack roles aren't you?
I have heard stories secondhand from people along the lines of "my dad and his buddy were in a jeep that got lost post VE day and the Soviets tried to kill them for no reason" a couple of times but those are of about as much reliability as the old "my dad said we lost Market Garden because the British had to stop to make tea" stories you see in the same threads. Have you got a link to a transcript of the interview by any chance?

I told those tea-obsessed assholes to keep running, but noooooooooooo...

my dad fucked around with this message at 02:53 on Feb 18, 2014

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

maev posted:

It's not quite as easy as that, unless you're talking about the literal architects and members of the Nazi state who enabled and planned it. The violence and completeness in which the Nazi state forced it's authority on its subject people is breathtaking. By 1945 persecution of it's own people who refused to follow the party line to the letter, on every societal level, were basically brutally murdered.

Note: When you talk about World Warcrimes 2, this will nearly always become a focal point of debate. So why don't some milispergers talk about something else, like, um.. the cold war (Curse you wargame :argh:)

However, "Maybe the Nazis weren't actually all that bad" isn't a very good note to end a conversation on.

I'm reading this conversation, and nobody said that all Germans who were alive during WW2 were horrible people who deserved punishment, and nobody said that the Soviets never committed any warcrimes. So you're kind of confusing me.

Being a concentration camp guard is somewhere near the top of the list of horrible atrocities an individual with no subordinates can be responsible of. Those are the people who stood by and watched as countless people were butchered, and their job was to shoot anyone who tries to avoid their fate. Even if the guards in question never shot anyone, which we can never know, and even though they were only 18 or so, they contributed heavily to one of the most effective machines of human death that ever existed in the entire history of mankind. Them being caught and given a (fair) trial sends a message that the people who participate in such atrocities will not get away with it.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Rabhadh posted:

After the second world war 2.

Nobody could be bothered to do it right after the first world war 2, and when the third rolled up, Nuremberg airport raised prices in advance.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

AATREK CURES KIDS posted:

While technically correct, isn't that like saying the American Civil War started over the shelling of Fort Sumter? I'm under the impression that the religious conflict was already causing unrest across Europe and the Bohemian Revolt happened to be the event that drew a lot of powers into war.

The word 'sparked' comes to mind. The powder keg was already there.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

JaucheCharly posted:

How many people in this thread fought in a warzone, were shot at, or were in a brawl where they feared for their life?

Well, I live in a country that was bombed by NATO, and have also experienced circumstances in which I feared for my life even outside of the mentioned bombing.

Also, my father is a war veteran, and I have friends who live(d) in Bosnia and Kosovo, so I got to hear several first hand accounts of what things are/were like.

None of the stuff I experienced or heard makes me want to participate in a war, or be within a thousand miles from one.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

JaucheCharly posted:

So what's the proper premodern way of repelling horse?

Ruddha.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Libluini posted:

Now I envision a future where wars at sea are decided by railgun-ships bombarding the enemy shoreline and the enemy shooting back with missiles to stop the slugs from hitting. The side which runs out of money for missiles first has to frantically capitulate before it's coastlines are reduced to rubble.

Solution: Robot swarms. Large quantities of small, cheap, difficult to detect self-organizing underwater explosive devices guided by a swarm AI, creeping up on railboats and blowing them up.



We should have a :pseudo: version of the :mil101: smiley.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
Rough translation (My Russian is godawful):

Example 3:

A German train is going from point A to point B. Question: When will it reach point B if the distance is 100km, and the speed of the train 30km/h?
Answer: It will never arrive to point B because it will be blown up by the partisans.

Example 4:

How much fuel should a Germain aircraft carry during an attack on our troops, if it spends 300 liters to arrive, and spends the same amount on the return trip?
Answer: 300 liters, because it ain't coming back.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Mustang posted:

My dad wrote a monograph while attending the School of Advanced Military Studies at Fort Leavenworth arguing that Nathanael Greene and his campaign in the South was an example of operational art.

Really interesting man, it's a shame more American's don't know who Nathanael Greene was considering his role during the revolution.

Attaboy! Now, don't forget to quote the important bits of the monograph...

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
Huh, I remember Oka as a measure of weight and volume from a few old folk tales. Didn't know it was of Turkish origin.

my dad fucked around with this message at 19:55 on May 9, 2014

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

JaucheCharly posted:

A few turkish words found their way into our vocabulary. I don't know if okka is one. Maybe somebody knows more? E.g. In Germany, the word Kadi is an alternative word for court that people sometimes use. An Imam who worked as a judge was called Kadi in the Ottoman Empire.

Oh, quite a few Turkish words penetrated Serbian language during the centuries of Ottoman rule*. I just wasn't aware that Oka is one of them. Kadi (Kadija) isn't used here normally, but thanks to its appearance in fairly important literary works and a couple of jokes, everyone's aware that it means 'judge'.

*And, apparently, a couple of Serbian words entered Turkish language and got all the way to India due to trade routes, but nowhere near as many

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Follow the bouncing Italian...

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

HEY GAL posted:

If you're interested at all in actions which are the most hilarious thing you've read that day and, at the same time and for the same reason, a breathtaking tale of human misery and at least one easily-preventable fuckup, you need to study this period.

Easily preventable fuckup?

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

HEY GAL posted:

Yeah, the paperwork for that is murder.

Bureaucracy, will it ever stop being a dead weight?

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
So, I've been told about a rather interesting man today yesterday (yikes, writing this took a bit too long), and I'd like to share what I've heard (and Googled :shobon:).

The Conflict: The First Balkan War, Battle of Kumanovo (Serbia vs The Ottoman Empire)

The Soldier: Ahmed Ademović (Muslim Roma, trumpet musician) - Serbian infantryman

The Moustache:



The Situation:

The Ottoman army was stuck in an unpleasant position fighting against the Balkan Alliance on several fronts, heavily outnumbered. Their Chief of Staff, Nazim Pasha, refused to go along with the plan "hold the line until the great powers interfere" and instead wanted to attempt to defeat the Alliance armies in detail. Without waiting for his forces to be fully assembled, he organized a surprise attack on the Serbian army, which he believed to be the weakest link of the Alliance. With the Ottoman force outnumbered 2 to 1, his plan relied on surprising the Serbian commanders (who expected the Ottoman army to be in the process of fortifying defensive positions) and crushing the front lines before the reserves could react. His plan was an initial success, and the Serbian commanders were indeed caught with their pants down, taking waaaaaay too long to realize that the fighting was an actual battle.

The Feat:

And now we come to Ahmed's role in the battle. Imagine this: your commanders think the battle is actually a skirmish with an enemy scouting force, the enemy is pressing you hard, and nobody around you has an idea what to do. So, how does a simple soldier like Ahmed save the day? Well, Ahmed had a brilliant idea and enough steel in his nads to actually do it: He got behind the enemy lines (while being shot at), still carrying his trusty instrument, sounded the Ottoman signal for retreat, got back to his side in the ensuing chaos, and while the enemy was still in complete disarray, sounded the Serbian signal to attack.

The Aftermath:

While this didn't change the course of battle on its own, it was one of the factors that prevented the collapse of the Serbian line long enough for the reserves to react. Once the Ottomans lost the initiative, well, they were still outnumbered 2 to 1. The battle was over rather quickly.

Ahmed received the Order of the Star of Karađorđe for his bravery, and enjoyed a great deal of respect in his hometown. His family experienced a tragedy in 1941 - two of his sons (Redža and Rama) were executed by the Nazis along with half a thousand other Roma from the area. He died in 1965, 92 years old.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Fangz posted:

Is the case of Germany and Russia in WWI the only real example of one side *overestimating* their opponent's will to fight?

Russo-Japanese war, perhaps?

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
While I really, really don't want to get involved to discuss just how lovely AH actually was, every time someone posts something like this:

vyelkin posted:

Again, not as an objectively wonderful state, but as the best multiethnic state in a region renowned, at that time as today, for its quasi-genocidal ethnic conflict.

I'm going to reply with a link to this paper.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

JaucheCharly posted:

Caliber 80 centimetres. Never. Not even if they smear the barrel with K&Y

Hey, at least you can grease him up enough to ease the head in, and the rest would form a tight plug.

What were we talking about again?

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

HEY GAL posted:

And mercenaries and the civic militia don't serve for 20 years in this period--I think you got that from descriptions of 18th century standing armies? Mercenaries sign up for one month, six months (I think?) or a campaign, while citizens contribute to their city's defense just as part of living in a city, I don't know if there's a "time when they serve" or not.

Were there many people who'd sign up for a month, earn/loot some cash, and go back to normal(ish) life after that?

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Grand Prize Winner posted:

It was the only book from a revolutionary Russian lit class I actually enjoyed. The Foundation Pit was too slow and I found Master and Margherita nigh incomprehensible.

Master and Margarita really suffers from poor translations. I've been told that there's a particularly bad English one which tends to be the one people end up reading.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
Manuscripts don't burn.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

P-Mack posted:

I just picked up Robert Kann's A History of the Habsburg Empire at a yard sale for 50 cents. Anyone read it? Should I have saved the quarters for a pinball machine?

Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaann! :argh:

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Tevery Best posted:

Photo 18 there is quite hilarious.

"We're gonna charge, leave that loving bike, man!"
"I CAN'T WHAT IF SOMEONE STEALS IT?!?!?!"


Too much time spent playing Renegade, man. You can never know where the Black Hand lurks.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
Question for reenactors: What do you do when reenacting Glorious Battle of Random Rock and some guys on The Losing SideTM decide to keep 'fighting' instead of going down like chumps the way they're supposed to?

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
I've been watching the Three Kingdoms series, (And watched the Red Cliff movie) and I have to ask: Was fire really such a powerful influence on the battlefields of China at the time, or is it more a case of fire attacks being remembered and recorded because they look spectacular?

edit:

Also,


Did this really happen, or is it a Rot3K invention?

my dad fucked around with this message at 13:42 on Jul 19, 2014

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Ensign Expendable posted:

Lakirovanniy Grob Garantirovan. The mnemonic was "lacquered", regardless of how the actual thing was covered.

:allears:

Are there many military acronyms that had their meaning modified in a particularly fun way by the troops?

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Rabhadh posted:

Didn't it only carry 32 or so rounds?

It can destroy up to 32 Panzer IV tanks in a single run, comrade!

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

bewbies posted:

I don't really have much else to say except that rocketry was awesome and also I didn't realize von Braun was so awful.

Nazi Schmazi...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDjmEj25k5U

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

JaucheCharly posted:

I have a 40 year old puukko from my dad :P

So that's what happened to the knife...

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my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

FAUXTON posted:

He's like The Bible, or God, etc.

Gimmick accounts made to pick up on stuff like that. Hell, I was "The Entire Universe" before I changed my name.

I actually make username jokes fairly rarely. Gimmicks get boring fast, but a surprise zinger once a month ensures maximum comedy without running the joke into the ground.

edit: I still can't believe that nobody made this username for 12 years. "my dad" is the gimmicky username with the highest potential for comedy, due to context it's usually used in.

my dad fucked around with this message at 22:00 on Aug 4, 2014

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