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Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
Officially every 6 months. Realistically every 5-7 months because it's not like a hard hard rule.

Plus 3 weeks after any accidents like a condom slipping off inside or splitting.

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Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

HamsterPolice posted:

How much is it usually? Do you just ask your PCP to do it?

I'm British so it's free. I go to a really cool clinic which only exists for std testing. It was purpose built for it.

Anne Whateley posted:

3 weeks after a condom break isn't going to do much

Good to know. It's only happened once and with a trusted partner who follows the same schedule but I'll bare that in mind if it happens again. And probably still do a 3 week one to try to catch some nasties early but also a later one too.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

purple death ray posted:

Hey guys I had sex with this wild lady, you know how it goes, well we were having so much sex that my bed moved across the room like three feet from all of the sex we did. So this morning I woke up and went to have some more sex but my bed wasn't where it usually is (from all the sex I had last night, dunno if I mentioned that?) so I stubbed my toe, anyway long story short anyone know a good remedy for a stubbed toe you got because you had so much sex you rearranged your furniture?

Jokes aside, this is why I won't do beds with wheels. Back in our pre kids pre marriage days we stayed at a flat my late grandad was renting out for a few weeks when it was between tenants. It had a bed with wheels and drat that thing ended up all over during sex!

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

mllaneza posted:

Coconut oil tastes better though.

You have tastebuds in your rear end in a top hat? drat.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
Also don't joint fetlife and start messaging random women. Find stuff going on in your local area and go make some friends.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

Anne Whateley posted:

Yeah that was why I posted it. condoms...are good

As is post vasectomy sex inside a monogamous relationship or with people with whom your risk profile deems acceptable to fluid bond with.

Condom free sex is awesome and my snip was the best decision ever, but if I'm putting it in strange I'm wrapping it up.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
Durex Avanti are good but skyn large totally kick rear end. They aren't much worse than raw, both for me and my partners. Back when I used condoms with my wife (pre snip) it was non latex all the way once we found them, not because of allergies but because they just feel so much nicer, transfer heat so much better and don't smell of latex. They even taste better.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
I'd be fine with lamb in my mouth. I often pay for the privilege! But yeah they don't protect against STIs (the only reason I have for using protection post snip ) so I stick with polyisoprene. Which is a non latexy rubber.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
You chase that bliss. Monogamy always just strikes me as the relationship version of shopping at whole foods, like your life is so devoid of bullshit and problems that you can afford to turn simple everyday things like food and sex into bespoke, exclusive bullshit and problems to make your life a little harder. Like you can't just buy an onion, you have to get a free trade vegan organic onion that's $17.50 because I don't have poo poo other complications to worry about. I can't just get horny and gently caress, I've got to make sure they are "the one" and will fulfil all my physical and emotional needs, or I can be accused of emotional affairs. And is flirting okay? Or kissing? Porn? Are we completely sexually compatible with similar drives? Apparently it works for some people, so good luck on being one of them, because when it fails it seems to fail catastrophically. Like, lawyers tend to get involved!

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
Just remember that oil based lubes can weaken latex.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
If your condoms expire, they don't have to end up in the bin. It's always worth keeping a few around for the odd posh wank.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
If it's a chain (bought and paid for online suggests as much) then a call to head office will soon sort that poo poo out.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
I'd assume the opposite of a glory hole is a hole you place your dick through for an anonymous person on the other side to do CBT?

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

KillHour posted:

I bet you could tell a lot about somebody if you asked them personal questions while looking at their erect penis.

That's how I generally conduct job interviews.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
You could always pull out the old reliable "five in the pink, five in the stink" move. Nothing says seduced quite like a double fisting.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

whydirt posted:

Unless you have burlap underwear, my thoughts are it shouldn’t feel uncomfortable on your exposed junk

As someone with a foreskin I'd say that if I pulled it back, my cotton underwear would be pretty drat uncomfortable on the head.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

Ogmius815 posted:

Edit: naaaaa too embarrassed.

Maybe try butt stuff?

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
My butt stuff thing was a joke as I didn't see the original post, but if it's being unable to orgasm then that's basically a super power. Better than being a two pump chump. The SSRI I'm on makes it harder for me to cum. When I get there it's way better though. Kinda like after a long edging session. Not all partners can get me there, but if they can't then *shrug* I just help out a little.

And butt stuff, of course.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

Ok Comboomer posted:

simply don’t use lube, lube is for the weak

you’re going to want your butthole to callus eventually by hook or by crook, or else you’re going to have difficulty with more interesting chord voicings

Or use your tears. They are nature's lube.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

Hyperlynx posted:

...what makes you think what you posted is in any way obviously a sex thing?

You've never recorded yourself talking dirty, tone shifted it so it sounds like someone else of the sex you are into, then soundboarded it while having some self time? Prude!

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

Liquid Communism posted:

If you're going to fall back on your butt speaker, please make sure it has a flared base.

Or tie a sturdy string to it.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

KillHour posted:

Edit: Or maybe do because leprosy is easily curable and not a big deal at all :eng101:

6-12 months of a multi drug regime isn't exactly easy!

Now the Black Death... that's a 2 week course of antibiotics. I've had the same for a chest infection.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
While your on this journey... try non latex next. Using a skyn will completely change your life.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

Ok Comboomer posted:

Really? One of my last long term partners had a latex allergy (supposedly. There’s evidence to dispute that, but whatever) and I didn’t really find skyn to be all that special or great vs latex.

What do you find preferable about it? I suppose it smells a bit better

It's so so so much better at transmitting heat compared to latex.

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Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?
I want to know how anyone could be in a position to tell if they taste alike.

I mean who's nasty enough to put mushrooms in their mouth?

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