Look, let's be completely serious, there's nothing to really know or care about in Australian politics. Tony Abbott won because Labor kicked an own-goal for some nebulous reason that historians will puzzle over for decades to come (hah, just kidding, in two years we won't have historians) and has been spending every waking day doing his utmost to burn the country down while claiming he had to do it because: - Labor Waste - Boat-related issues - People who aren't white - Game of Thrones related megalomania - The word 'friend of the family' Milky, you say, you can't use that word. Twitter disagrees. So, y'know, that's happening. In good news for Australia, I think we managed to get the Japanese to stop whaling but I remain firmly convinced that is just because we want to harpoon them ourselves. We're also not actually invading someone like Russia is. Do I need to fill this with things? Like, actually useful things? INSERT TITLE TEXT HERE The Coalition Pictured from left to right: Christopher Pyne, Tony Abbott and Malcolm Turnbull. Did you know that the Decepticons, literal Saturday morning cartoon villians, have better gender equality amongst their robot people than the Coalition does in their front bench? loving awesome. The Coalition is typically concerned with such things as conquering Cybertron, defeating the Autobots, amassing large quantities of energon, developing powerful weaponry, and beating people up. Not necessarily in that order. Interestingly, there are no boat Decepticons. Makes you think. The Labor Party See, sure these guys dress themselves up as working-class and working for the common man and whatever, but they're really no different from the above guys. When push comes to shove, they spend too long trying to decide who gets to be the head before collapsing in on each other which, y'know, is funny as hell in retrospect but also incredibly sad. But Milky, shouldn't the Labor party be the Autobots? Uh, no, gently caress you. The Autobots are good robots. If the Labor Party are Autobots, then they're the Autobots from the episode where Megatron challenged Optimus to 1v1 him mid lane with the losers being banished from Earth forever and Megatron proceeds to obviously and repeatedly cheat during the duel and the Autobots just kind of throw up their hands and go 'welp, guess we have to leave, a duel is a duel' when Optimus loses. ...which is kind of fitting, really. SCOTT LUDLUM SCOTT LUDLUM SCOTT LUDLUM "And, perhaps most profoundly, your determined campaign to provoke fear in our community - fear of innocent families fleeing war and violence in our region - in the hope that it would bring out the worst in Cybertronians is instead bringing out the best in us. Megatron, you are welcome to take your heartless racist exploitation of people's fears and ram it as far from Cybertron as your taxpayer funded travel entitlements can take you." However, everyone knows that Scott Ludlum's election confrontation with Abbott will go something like this because Labor will try to remodel themselves as some sort of new 'hot rod' and only get in the way and gently caress things up for everyone involved. And I guess there's a wiki? And things like that? Who the gently caress cares. Milkfred E. Moore fucked around with this message at 02:11 on Apr 2, 2014 |
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:08 |
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# ? May 5, 2024 20:20 |
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Milky postin'.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:13 |
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quote:Why Australians must pay to plug Government’s budget hole
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:16 |
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Which robot is Clive Palmer?
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:19 |
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Sir Coq of Nandos posted:Which robot is Clive Palmer? Unicron
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:20 |
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Time to groundfloor this poo poo while hedging my bets.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:23 |
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Who voted for poo poo posting? You ask around but nobody owns up.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:23 |
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Cartoon posted:Who voted for poo poo posting? You ask around but nobody owns up. Don't worry, I'm sure you'll be able to lead the public discourse into supporting your mandate regardless.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:27 |
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Groundfloor
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:29 |
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Best OP in months imo
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:31 |
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Vote 1 cut and paste Manus Island OP into this one, they're both great for their own reasons.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:40 |
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So in actual economic news, the Carbon Tax allegedly claims another victim in Queensland, as BP will be shutting down a refinery.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:42 |
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Ettin posted:"Wages increase every year, but income tax thresholds are fixed. Earn just dollar more and boom, you’ve gone up a tax bracket." *tax brackets scare tactics ignorance* *but we gotta pay more tax to fund social policy*
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:51 |
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Endman posted:Milky postin'. You son of a bitch.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:51 |
Here is an analogy: "I am a building contractor. Last week I sold all of my tools, supplies and my vehicle. I then gave all the money I raised from these sales to customers as retroactive discounts on past services. Now I don't have any money, or any way to make money in the future, and I don't know why!"
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:56 |
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Transformers OP is the best OP I can remember.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 02:58 |
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Best op
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:01 |
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Remember Angry White Man on QandA? He's a Parramatta City Councillor. e: this OP is more than meets the eye
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:08 |
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Peri-urban sounds delicious.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:11 |
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I love how this terrifying budget hole could be plugged by repealing literally two Howard-era tax cuts, but no we're all gonna have to FEEL THE PAIN.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:14 |
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quote:Interestingly, there are no boat Decepticons http://tfwiki.net/wiki/Thunderblast
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:15 |
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http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-04-02/students-killed-in-brisbane-since-november/5361056 QLD is almost up to one foreign student killed a month since November. Cmon Queensland!
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:16 |
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SynthOrange posted:http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-04-02/students-killed-in-brisbane-since-november/5361056 Why should we feel sympathy for them? They're not even Australian.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:18 |
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This is the best Auspol OP I've seen in at least 30 days.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:22 |
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Quantum Mechanic posted:I love how this terrifying budget hole could be plugged by repealing literally two Howard-era tax cuts, but no we're all gonna have to FEEL THE PAIN. Repealing tax cuts is not on the cards, it's actually better to let bracket creep do its work in the long run. Removing one of the tax cuts for example would be considered an economic shock if it were a dramatic enough increase.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:25 |
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SynthOrange posted:http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-04-02/students-killed-in-brisbane-since-november/5361056 Australia Does Not Have A Problem With Foreigners.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:27 |
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We're a welcoming and friendly country and if you disagree with me I'll fucken glass ya oval office
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:28 |
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adamantium|wang posted:Remember Angry White Man on QandA? He's a Parramatta City Councillor. My favourite part was when he said all refugees are dole bludgers (to the man on the panel who was son of a WWII Jewish refugee)
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:29 |
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Quantum Mechanic posted:I love how this terrifying budget hole could be plugged by repealing literally two Howard-era tax cuts, but no we're all gonna have to FEEL THE PAIN. What I love is how this is a pro-Liberal opinion piece disguised as front-page news Incidentally, quote:TONY Abbott has established a covert political hit squad which is funded by taxpayers, operates outside parliamentary scrutiny and has a controversial leader.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:29 |
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Guys April Fools is over you're all looking hella dumb. Guys?
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:34 |
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My favourite part is that our Prime Minister is an economic migrant.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:38 |
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Crossposting:
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:40 |
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Quantum Mechanic posted:I love how this terrifying budget hole could be plugged by repealing literally two Howard-era tax cuts, but no we're all gonna have to FEEL THE PAIN. Option 1: marginal rates flat, don't index brackets - you pay more tax, but it's because you are a Totally Successful Self Made Man Climbing Teh Ladder Bootstraps (if you even notice your gross tax increasing, which 90% of people don't, so you get away with it almost always) Option 2: index brackets, raise marginal rates - you likely pay less tax, but THE GOVERNMENT BASTARDS RAISED MAH TAXES Of course they are going with #1. Considering the Coalition has incumbency with an unassailable lead in the polls with no election on the horizon, making it the perfect time to make necessary but unpopular structural changes... which structural reforms is Brave Admiral Joe Hockey going to take to solve this emergency? - Implement a proper MRT/RRT - and maybe this time, don't be massive babbys about it when a bunch of WA/QLD trogs bitch about it in poorly produced tv ads - Implement a proper ETS, and maybe this time don't be massive babbys about it and overcompensate everyone who might have hurt feelings - Reform FTB A & B, since they are clearly broken at this point and don't even have a clear purpose - Maybe consider having a tiny peek at that $50bn pa superannuation black hole where the overwhelming majority of benefits go to those in the top two tax brackets. Ya know. - Include the PPOR in the pension assets test to both decrease total pension spend and stop peverse malinvestment in overcapitalising a taxfree asset (perhaps redirect some of the savings into equalising the treatment of the pension and newstart, instead of demonising vulnerable people to win votes from retirees who threw on a new kitchen and pool in order to collect a pension while they bleat to Alan Jones about TEH DOLE BLUDGERS who we give 30% less because reasons) - Income test health care cards for seniors, for the same reason - ffs, it's time to go Negative gearing. Pretty sure that $5bn a year we spend subsidising loss-making speculation is enough tradeoff to risk the fictional ZOMG LANDLORDS STRIKE. - Drop the CGT discount since it's totally failed in it's initial purpose to discourage short term speculation and lead to huge amounts of overcapitalisation and... medium term speculation. BrosephofArimathea fucked around with this message at 03:52 on Apr 2, 2014 |
# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:42 |
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i hate australia its a lovely land
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:46 |
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BrosephofArimathea posted:Option 1: marginal rates flat, don't index brackets - you pay more tax, but it's because you are a Totally Successful Self Made Man Climbing Teh Ladder Bootstraps (if you even notice your gross tax increasing, which 90% of people don't) All of those are politically difficult, lets just kick the mentally ill off the DSP. Also does anyone here work for the ATO I could use some help.
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:47 |
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Jumpingmanjim posted:All of those are politically difficult, lets just kick the mentally ill off the DSP. don't give him your home address
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:51 |
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 03:54 |
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Who's the lady on the far right of that image supposed to be?
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 04:00 |
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webmeister posted:Who's the lady on the far right of that image supposed to be? Catherine's mum I think
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 04:02 |
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# ? May 5, 2024 20:20 |
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So in addition to not checking with his party room about bringing back Knights and Dames, Tony Abbott may not have checked with the Queen either. There's increasing questions about when the Letters Patent needed were signed by the Queen. 'Asked why the office would not disclose the exact date, a spokeswoman for the Prime Minister said: "We just don't want to release it."'
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# ? Apr 2, 2014 04:09 |