- Frank Horrigan
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by Ralp
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Welcome to Liberal Crime Squad, a crappy text game from bay12games (of Dwarf Fortress fame). Arch-Conservatism has swept the land, and it's up to us, the last bastion of liberalism in America, to destroy Jesus and usher in a new age of liberal darkness. After the brief introduction, we pick our name ("We" because you, dear reader, are on this adventure with me. You may not realize it, but deep in your heart you want the star of this story to be me, Frank Horrigan), and are presented with the primary interface.
At the top we've got our location, the date, our current activity, and our available funds. Just for the record, I will probably cheat my loving rear end off via Cheat Engine because nobody is interested in a story that involves us running out of money and getting killed within the first month.
Beneath this we have the squad view, which consists of us (yes, you and me!  ) and only us. Frank Horrigan. Under the skill column there are some numbers that I haven't figured out yet beyond "higher = better". We've got our equipment listed next, then our health, and what vehicle we're using (if any).
Right now we need to focus on spreading our liberal filth to the populace, which requires a bit of set up. First, let's set our slogan. This is essentially the name our game will be known by, the title it'll have in the high scores, and what we spray paint when we raid areas. It can be changed at any time, but for now let's go with a classic.
Simple, and to the point. Next, we need to arm ourselves. We go into the boring travel menu, and select the pawn and gun shop, then wait until we arrive.
A basic glance over the pawn shop's interface. We pick up a .44 and some ammo, then head to the park to preach our ideals.
We won't be going into extreme detail on this interface, simply because of how much is there, but for now suffice to say we're in a park with some people. We jam a gun into this poor bastard's ribs and force him to come with us.
Our quarry in our possession, we give him a super secret liberal codename. He will be known by this name among the LCS, but referred to his real name everywhere else.
NEXT TIME: The Reeducation of Angry Fish
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Jun 11, 2014 01:47
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 18, 2024 02:10
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- bwatts
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cool.
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Jun 11, 2014 01:47
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- Eye of Widesauron
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CAN I BE IN IT
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Jun 11, 2014 01:48
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- Captain No-mates
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hello!
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Jun 11, 2014 01:48
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- ass
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Health
Liberal
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Jun 11, 2014 01:48
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- cuntman.net
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tldr
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Jun 11, 2014 01:48
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- thewizardofshoe
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pasting in thrad
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Jun 11, 2014 01:48
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- Noctis Horrendae
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a good thread
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Jun 11, 2014 01:48
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- Bukowski
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hammulder
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Death to all enemies, brother
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Jun 11, 2014 01:54
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- Frank Horrigan
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by Ralp
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We're back at our safe house now, laying low. We need to get to work on debating Angry Fish over to our cause though, so we delve into the "A - Activate Liberals" menu.
There's a lot of options here, and some of them have many suboptions. For now, we need to tend to our Conservative hostage.
With the order given, we need to wait until the next day for poo poo to happen.
Time to get our game plan together. We're going to tie Angry Fish to a chair, give him crazy drugs to gently caress with his head, and then beat the religion right out of him. 
Since we have a rather low Psychology skill, we're not that fantastic at reeducating people just yet. We ARE on a time limit though; If this takes too long Angry Fish will be reported missing, which will trigger police investigations, loss of public opinion, and Angry Fish won't be able to go back to his normal life as a sleeper liberal for us. We'll just keep beating the poo poo out of him for now, and if the cops start looking for him we'll shoot him in the head and dump his body near the docks. 
NEXT TIME: Assault on Sweatshop 13
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Jun 11, 2014 02:02
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- Eye of Widesauron
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BOOTSTRAPS
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Jun 11, 2014 02:08
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- Frank Horrigan
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by Ralp
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Jun 11, 2014 02:09
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- deep dish peat moss
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I started playing this yesterday and ended up just recruiting a cadre of prostitutes and collecting millions of dollars while hanging out in a crack house and stealing TVs... best pimp sim I've played
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Jun 11, 2014 02:11
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- deep dish peat moss
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I'm not sure what the actual goal of the game is but usually I'll just go get in a shootout with the cops at the courthouse or something
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Jun 11, 2014 02:12
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- Frank Horrigan
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by Ralp
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I'm not sure what the actual goal of the game is but usually I'll just go get in a shootout with the cops at the courthouse or something
There's a set of various public issues, each on a scale between "Arch-Liberal" and "Arch-Conservative". At the start of the game, public opinion is overwhelmingly in favor of the latter. The goal is to indoctrinate so many people and manipulate public opinion enough that every politician ends up being Arch-Liberal. Then you just sit back and wait for them to change all of the laws to Arch-Liberal, destroying America through gun control and free healthcare.
The game is basically taking the piss out of the Fox News caricature of liberals.
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Jun 11, 2014 02:16
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- deep dish peat moss
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I just play it as an anti-establishment simulator and hit the streets in a roving gang of transient punk rockers and beat up corporate CEOs until the police raid our crack house and arrest us
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Jun 11, 2014 02:18
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- Frank Horrigan
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by Ralp
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I just play it as an anti-establishment simulator and hit the streets in a roving gang of transient punk rockers and beat up corporate CEOs until the police raid our crack house and arrest us
That's how the majority of LCS games go, yeah. I imagine it'll only be a couple more updates before gun violence breaks out. It's worth noting that this game has hilariously over-detailed combat, in a Dwarf Fortress-esque fashion. Lots of screaming, praying to god, going into shock, etc. when the bullets start flying.
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Jun 11, 2014 02:20
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- deep dish peat moss
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I never plan to actually try to beat it but it's fun as gently caress to just be a criminal sociopath in my current game I have a team of hackers working day in day out at credit card fraud and bringing in thousands of dollars a day which I spend on guns and ammo that I use to raid sweatshops and capture all of the illegal immigrants, who are now churning out expensive suits every day which I sell to the pawn shop, and buying/selling businesses for laundering purposes. I also have a lawyer in my basement who I've been pumping DMT in to every day
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Jun 11, 2014 02:26
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- A Bad King
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Suppose the oil man,
He comes to town.
And you don't lay money down.
Yet Mr. King,
He killed the thread
The other day.
Well I wonder.
Who's gonna go to Hell?
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 please don't beat me no more.
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Jun 11, 2014 02:31
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- Eye of Widesauron
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MK ULTRA ALL UP IN THIS BITCH AMIRITE
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Jun 11, 2014 02:39
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- Bukowski
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hammulder
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oh man i really wanna play this now
i hope  wakes up to the evils of his oppressors and gets shot later
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Jun 11, 2014 02:39
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- Eye of Widesauron
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If this goes into Iran Contra we need to have people using the Guns of the Patriots Soundtrack
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Jun 11, 2014 02:40
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- A Bad King
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Suppose the oil man,
He comes to town.
And you don't lay money down.
Yet Mr. King,
He killed the thread
The other day.
Well I wonder.
Who's gonna go to Hell?
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 don't give me LSD next time rear end in a top hat!
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Jun 11, 2014 02:52
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- Volkerball
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by FactsAreUseless
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I actually have this game. its real hard
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Jun 11, 2014 02:56
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- dogcrash truther
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I actually have this game. its real hard
yeah
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Jun 11, 2014 02:59
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- deep dish peat moss
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drat I hosed up and got hosed up
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Jun 11, 2014 03:00
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- Pinche Rudo
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Let's fire it back up and hit the sweatshop first
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Jun 11, 2014 03:10
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- Frank Horrigan
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by Ralp
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Let's fire it back up and hit the sweatshop first
We'll do that tomorrow, right now I'm gonna get high and watch Adventure Time
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Jun 11, 2014 03:23
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- Volkerball
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by FactsAreUseless
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go to the park or the vegan place or w/e and pick up some skanky liberal bitches
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Jun 11, 2014 03:28
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- BoothsBeard
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When dealing with the degenerate liberal it is important that you remember to cut off the airflow while exercising your manifest destiny upon their wives, thus increasing your own pleasure.
Thank you and God Bless.
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Jun 11, 2014 03:30
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- A Bad King
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Suppose the oil man,
He comes to town.
And you don't lay money down.
Yet Mr. King,
He killed the thread
The other day.
Well I wonder.
Who's gonna go to Hell?
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When dealing with the degenerate liberal it is important that you remember to cut off the airflow while exercising your manifest destiny upon their wives, thus increasing your own pleasure.
Thank you and God Bless.
we are the skanky liberals in this game ty
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Jun 11, 2014 03:31
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- BoredDG
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This game is great. We should get a newspaper. Newspapers are overpowered.
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Jun 11, 2014 05:34
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 18, 2024 02:10
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- cuntman.net
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When dealing with the degenerate liberal it is important that you remember to cut off the airflow while exercising your manifest destiny upon their wives, thus increasing your own pleasure.
Thank you and God Bless.
and then your shoot them in the dick am i right
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Jun 11, 2014 05:40
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Jun 11, 2014 01:47
), a skill I assume can help you convert hostages. We put him on the job.
