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Spaceman Future!
Feb 9, 2007

cname posted:

Oh I get it! "Life hacks" that's cute! So like washing out your condoms for re-use instead of just throwing them away after one load.

LifeHack: anal sex abortions are cheap

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Spaceman Future!
Feb 9, 2007

Who What Now posted:

Your mouth is the start of one very long flesh-tube that leads all the way to your rear end in a top hat.

You mouth and rear end in a top hat are linked together. Forever.

Your poop was delicious only a few short hours before. Life Hack.. it can be again.

Spaceman Future!
Feb 9, 2007

Darth Freddy posted:

You are really defensive about this were you abused by a grill or abused at some sort of backyard grilling event?

He had a bad experience in the back of a uhaul truck trying to use a wicker chair as tinder for grilling. Hasn't been the same ever since.

Spaceman Future!
Feb 9, 2007

Tiny Brontosaurus posted:

And if the little bastards try to sneak out of their rooms at night, bring out the artillery:


Kids sneaking out in the middle of the night to party?! One weird trick to blow confetti directly into their retina, they scream in pain now but every day is a party when you have joyful particulate floating inside your eye!

Next up: too tired to set your alarm? Hire a homeless man and give him a flashbang, its a green way to start the day!

Spaceman Future! has a new favorite as of 07:51 on Aug 29, 2014

Spaceman Future!
Feb 9, 2007

Coffee not waking you up any more? Save time and be more efficient, just add several grams of Crank and inject the brew directly into your eyeball.

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Spaceman Future!
Feb 9, 2007

Cat Hatter posted:

Best part is that there is a button for pouring a nice glass of piping hot beer for anybody you can trick into drinking it.

If I drank anywhere near that much beer I would be pouring out piping hot beer every 10 minutes or so and you wouldn't even need to press a button.

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