- Peta
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Dear BYOB please help me write my cover letter to the enigmatic yet bewitching force for good under the banner of which I hope to educate the unmotivated young plebs of the city in return for a salary of $0.00 and a handsome living stipend
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Jul 11, 2014 18:17
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Jun 10, 2024 10:02
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- verily carefree
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make sure you have a bolded, italacized and underlined 36 point font sentence saying "i do not molest children"
if u dont include this tehy might assume
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Jul 11, 2014 18:19
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- Peta
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I don't want them to think that's what was on my mind when I sought to advertise my best qualities to them via electronic letter, but I'll try to subtly slip it in just in case
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Jul 11, 2014 18:20
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- Peta
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Dear [redacted bcuz this is the Internet forums lol],
I just graduated from Harverd University with a Gpa of 3 and 3 quarters and I'd like to enlist in your teaching corps. (Not a child molester nor have I ever been.)
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Stuck on the next sentence. Thoughts?
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Jul 11, 2014 18:24
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- verily carefree
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just link them to your posting history and submit
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Jul 11, 2014 18:26
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- GEExCEE
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I'm passionate about youth development, and strive every day to drive self improvements in my students, who I would never molest.
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Jul 11, 2014 18:26
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- dogcrash truther
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your'e doing TFA?
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Jul 11, 2014 18:30
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- I Dunno
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make sure you emphasize you're a reliable worker by making it clear that you will not blow off teaching to use your stipend on drugs
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Jul 11, 2014 18:34
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- i am he
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I thought TFA was bad?
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Jul 11, 2014 18:35
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- Peta
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It's not TFA
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Jul 11, 2014 18:51
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- Looke
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get a god drat job, al
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Jul 11, 2014 18:53
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- City of Glompton
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so from what I have gathered itt, your letter should go something like this:
Dear not-tfa,
I am proud to announce I am applying for the teaching position you offer. You will be happy to note that I am not a child toucher, among my many other fine qualities. Pleases see my attached posting history on the somethingawful forums as proof
I llok forward to hearing from you soon!
Sinsurely,
Peta
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Jul 11, 2014 19:27
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- deep dish peat moss
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Having a generic non-personal cover letter is a good way to get your resume thrown in the trash. Write it from the heart or it's no good.
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Jul 11, 2014 19:50
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- cruft
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so from what I have gathered itt, your letter should go something like this:
Dear not-tfa,
I am proud to announce I am applying for the teaching position you offer. You will be happy to note that I am not a child toucher, among my many other fine qualities. Pleases see my attached posting history on the somethingawful forums as proof
I llok forward to hearing from you soon!
Sinsurely,
Peta
She does this sort of thing for a living, you should use this one Peta.
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Jul 11, 2014 19:53
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- deep dish peat moss
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Address the person you're sending it to
A paragraph stating your intent and covering relevant work/education history and applicable hobbies and interests
A paragraph about why you want the position and why your hobbies and work history make you the ideal candidate
A closing paragraph thanking the reviewer for their consideration and expressing interest in working together in future endeavors.
basic building blocks of baby's first cover letter
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Jul 11, 2014 19:54
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- emmie
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Address the person you're sending it to
A paragraph stating your intent and covering relevant work/education history and applicable hobbies and interests
A paragraph about why you want the position and why your hobbies and work history make you the ideal candidate
A closing paragraph thanking the reviewer for their consideration and expressing interest in working together in future endeavors.
a PS detailing how you aren't a child molester.
basic building blocks of baby's first cover letter
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Jul 11, 2014 20:06
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- emmie
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do you have any moral objections to molesting children, or have you just never tried it?
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Jul 11, 2014 20:07
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- deep dish peat moss
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P.S. I have only ONCE touched a baby's peehole and it was A AACCIDENT
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Jul 11, 2014 20:08
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Jun 10, 2024 10:02
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- Peta
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Having a generic non-personal cover letter is a good way to get your resume thrown in the trash. Write it from the heart or it's no good.
Family members have looked it over and they are trying to make my prose more wooden. I want to beat them up
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Jul 11, 2014 21:59
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