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Dexters Secret
Jun 19, 2014

Are you, or is someone you love, bad at video games? I'm here to help. Post your video game related issue and I will be more than happy to give you tips on how to get the high score, cheat codes for extra lives, or I can just recommend easy baby mode games. All at no expense to you!

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Thug Lessons
Dec 14, 2006


I lust in my heart for as many dead refugees as possible.
Explain how to 1cc dodonpach.

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

How do you time 4 items and some health bubbles at the same time for 10 minutes.

Thug Lessons
Dec 14, 2006


I lust in my heart for as many dead refugees as possible.

Wormskull posted:

How do you time 4 items and some health bubbles at the same time for 10 minutes.

Very carefully.

Dexters Secret
Jun 19, 2014

Thug Lessons posted:

Explain how to 1cc dodonpach.

This is a very difficult challenge, you will need a Gamer Power-Up.

Go to your local physician and tell them you have ADHD so you get a nice big Adderall prescription. With practice and drug abuse, anything is possible, gamer!

Stink fag
Aug 21, 2014

Thug Lessons
Dec 14, 2006


I lust in my heart for as many dead refugees as possible.

Dexters Secret posted:

This is a very difficult challenge, you will need a Gamer Power-Up.

Go to your local physician and tell them you have ADHD so you get a nice big Adderall prescription. With practice and drug abuse, anything is possible, gamer!

I was asking for regular gaming advice, not speedgaming :D

Dexters Secret
Jun 19, 2014

Thug Lessons posted:

I was asking for regular gaming advice, not speedgaming :D

Power-ups are very important. If you were Mario, would you ignore a helpful mushroom? Heck no! Nor should you!

Swelter Discharge
Mar 21, 2013

Thug Lessons posted:

Explain how to 1cc dodonpach.

well i think you just need to learn some stuff like where to look on the screen, tap dodging, how to bullet heard, when to bomb etc.. and then use mame and savestates to practice a lot. theres a pretty good pdf file you can find on the shmups forum called full extent of the jam that i think talks about stuff like that. peace

Thug Lessons
Dec 14, 2006


I lust in my heart for as many dead refugees as possible.

Swelter Discharge posted:

well i think you just need to learn some stuff like where to look on the screen, tap dodging, how to bullet heard, when to bomb etc.. and then use mame and savestates to practice a lot. theres a pretty good pdf file you can find on the shmups forum called full extent of the jam that i think talks about stuff like that. peace

Full Extent of the Jam is badass. I played touhou and it taught me the wrong places to look and now I die from poo poo at the bottom of the screen :negative:

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

Swelter Discharge posted:

well i think you just need to learn some stuff like where to look on the screen, tap dodging, how to bullet heard, when to bomb etc.. and then use mame and savestates to practice a lot. theres a pretty good pdf file you can find on the shmups forum called full extent of the jam that i think talks about stuff like that. peace

You do all that, huh? I just chief on some hydro for a few minutes, take a swig of Rebel Yell IPA and sit down and get my game on. But hey, whatever works for you guys.

Thug Lessons
Dec 14, 2006


I lust in my heart for as many dead refugees as possible.
I think using the best of your ability to execute very precise moves and dodge mind bending patterns is simply exhilarating !

Swelter Discharge
Mar 21, 2013

Thug Lessons posted:

I think using the best of your ability to execute very precise moves and dodge mind bending patterns is simply exhilarating !

it's

Swelter Discharge
Mar 21, 2013

i think it also tells you to put your hands in hot water before you play so they aren't cold to game better which is very smart

Discount Viscount
Jul 9, 2010

FIND THE FISH!
i tend to play RPGs in meathead mode and just go for the poo poo that hits really hard, how do i break this habit and subsequently break the games themselves to my very will>

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

Discount Viscount posted:

i tend to play RPGs in meathead mode and just go for the poo poo that hits really hard, how do i break this habit and subsequently break the games themselves to my very will>

Just mention a given game on a website like this and you'll have no shortage of people ruining it for you.

VideoGames
Aug 18, 2003
i am effin terrible at videogames! its like a constant battle with myself

Kobold eBooks
Mar 5, 2007

EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AN OPEN PALM SLAM A CARTRIDGE IN THE SUPER FAMICOM. ITS E-ZEAO AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE THE MAIN CHARACTER, CORPORAL FALCOM.

Discount Viscount posted:

i tend to play RPGs in meathead mode and just go for the poo poo that hits really hard, how do i break this habit and subsequently break the games themselves to my very will>

remind yourself that high numbers don't mean poo poo when you can instakill bitches

thuly
Jun 19, 2005

Transcending history, and the world, a tale of MS Paint and animes, endlessly retold.
Little tip work out to game better. More blood = better brains and hands

VideoGames
Aug 18, 2003

Foxhound
Sep 5, 2007

Minorkos
Feb 20, 2010

been wondering how to break 5.5k mmr in dota 2 please help

edit: this is a humble brag

Endorph
Jul 22, 2009

Minorkos posted:

been wondering how to break 5.5k mmr in dota 2 please help

edit: this is a humble brag
pee into a water bottle and poo poo into a sock

Kobold eBooks
Mar 5, 2007

EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AN OPEN PALM SLAM A CARTRIDGE IN THE SUPER FAMICOM. ITS E-ZEAO AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE THE MAIN CHARACTER, CORPORAL FALCOM.

Minorkos posted:

been wondering how to break 5.5k mmr in dota 2 please help

edit: this is a humble brag

teamwork and friendship

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

Minorkos posted:

been wondering how to break 5.5k mmr in dota 2 please help

edit: this is a humble brag

Play a real game like Quake Live instead.

Fargield
Sep 27, 2008

Pass that poo poo my honey

PantsBandit
Oct 26, 2007

it is both a monkey and a boombox
my friend called me and was mad because I told him to get shadow of mrodor but he thinks the stealth is too hard and the orcs kill him

Harrow
Jun 30, 2012

i am good at demon's and dark souls

not pvp, though, i am v bad at that

i am bad at most other games though. i guess i am good at jrpgs. i beat bravely default on hard and didn't even whine or anything, it was p fun. and i got pretty ok at metal gear rising but still poo poo at bayonetta and devil may cry

how do i get good at shootmans games and beat mans up games

memy
Oct 15, 2011

by exmarx

Endorph
Jul 22, 2009

SnotGrumble
Jun 4, 2003

All men live in fear of him and his Moxie.
I just started playing planetside 2, and I really loving suck at it. I get killed like 6 times for every time i kill someone. What should I do?

Endorph
Jul 22, 2009

SnotGrumble posted:

I just started playing planetside 2, and I really loving suck at it. I get killed like 6 times for every time i kill someone. What should I do?


Eye of Widesauron
Mar 29, 2014

Good honeypot op

Dead.juice
Dec 14, 2011

Sexier than assless chaps
It's not a video game, but I need to learn how to roll a d20 better in D&D, and quick!

SnotGrumble
Jun 4, 2003

All men live in fear of him and his Moxie.

Dead.juice posted:

It's not a video game, but I need to learn how to roll a d20 better in D&D, and quick!

Please read the op. You can't get help for that here.

01011001
Dec 26, 2012

Dead.juice posted:

It's not a video game, but I need to learn how to roll a d20 better in D&D, and quick!

there is no quick way to become a master of probability, friend

leftist heap
Feb 28, 2013

Fun Shoe

Harrow posted:

i am good at demon's and dark souls

not pvp, though, i am v bad at that

i am bad at most other games though. i guess i am good at jrpgs. i beat bravely default on hard and didn't even whine or anything, it was p fun. and i got pretty ok at metal gear rising but still poo poo at bayonetta and devil may cry

how do i get good at shootmans games and beat mans up games

what even qualifies as being good at jrpgs? like, good at grinding and sitting through cutscenes or what.

Harrow
Jun 30, 2012

rrrrrrrrrrrt posted:

what even qualifies as being good at jrpgs? like, good at grinding and sitting through cutscenes or what.

pretty much

though i didn't grind much in bravely default, i just got good at identifying boss patterns and what abilities i had that i could use to exploit them

but usually it's the first one

El Wombato
Mar 19, 2008

Mexican Marsupial

Dead.juice posted:

It's not a video game, but I need to learn how to roll a d20 better in D&D, and quick!

drill a little hole in the 1 side and fill it w/ lead. paint back over it. you're welcome.

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matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

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