UKMT December - Poorly Moderated by the 81st Most Powerful Person in the UK Media

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT December - Poorly Moderated by the 81st Most Powerful Person in the UK Media

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Pissflaps: Oct 20, 2002; by VideoGames

The woman was a scientist I doubt it took that long.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:15

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# ? May 4, 2024 23:35

gorki: Aug 9, 2014

I wonder if it was Jimmy Savile who explained it all to her

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:16

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Pissflaps posted:

The woman was a scientist I doubt it took that long.

It was explained by analogy with soft serve ice cream.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:17

Pesky Splinter: Feb 16, 2011; A worried pug.

Pissflaps posted:

The woman was a scientist I doubt it took that long.

Her area of scientific expertise, was chemistry - specifically the invention of Mr Whippy. Not biology...empathy...the human condition, etc.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:19

Gonzo McFee: Jun 19, 2010

quote:

Once I encountered Willie Whitelaw in the Smoking Room. He was white faced and cradled a bucket of whisky in his hand.

�What�s the matter, old boy?�

His rheumy oyster eyes looked up at me in in total despair. �Just spent an hour with Margaret.�

�Come on, you are Deputy Prime Minister, it goes with the rations.�

�Dear boy, we are in the middle of the AIDS campaign. I had to explain to her what anal sex was.�

Oh, to be a fly on that wall.

http://www.conservativehome.com/thecolumnists/2014/06/jerry-hayes-my-time-in-parliament-drunkenness-obscenity-and-thatcher.html

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:19

Disinterested: Jun 29, 2011; You look like you're still raking it in. Still killing 'em?

It's hilarious partly because how common a practice it seems to have been with all of her male contemporaries. What an odd collision of personalities that must have been.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:21

Jedit: Dec 10, 2011; Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Gonzo McFee posted:

There's also the story about how Thatcher had to be sat down for an hour and have it explained to her how anal sex works, but she refused to believe it was real.

Can't remember where I saw it, but it was there.

I've heard that story before, but it was Queen Victoria who needed the explanation. I suspect it's apocryphal on all counts.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:26

Pesky Splinter: Feb 16, 2011; A worried pug.

Jedit posted:

I've heard that story before, but it was Queen Victoria who needed the explanation. I suspect it's apocryphal on all counts.

IIRC, it was the concept of lesbians with Victoria - to which she supposedly replied that "Ladies do not do that sort of thing". Most likely apocryphal, yeah.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:28

Quote-Unquote: Oct 22, 2002; Can't post for 2 hours!

Thatcher spent her whole career loving miners in the butt. Much like close personal friend Savile.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:38

baka kaba: Jul 19, 2003; PLEASE ASK ME, THE SELF-PROFESSED NO #1 PAUL CATTERMOLE FAN IN THE SOMETHING AWFUL S-CLUB 7 MEGATHREAD, TO NAME A SINGLE SONG BY HIS EXCELLENT NU-METAL SIDE PROJECT, SKUA, AND IF I CAN'T PLEASE TELL ME TO
EAT SHIT

Gonzo McFee posted:

Thatcher Thatcher Buttplug Snatcher.

http://www.pinknews.co.uk/2014/12/30/thatcher-considered-banning-dildos-to-protect-public-decency/

Banning stuff even the Victorians were ok with

Guavanaut posted:

It was explained by analogy with soft serve ice cream.

There's a 99 joke here but I can't pick one

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:48

mfcrocker: Jan 31, 2004; Hot Rope Guy

baka kaba posted:

There's a 99 joke here but I can't pick one

A 99! Like a 69 but 30 worse!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBFqe_3M2Z8

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:53

Disinterested: Jun 29, 2011; You look like you're still raking it in. Still killing 'em?

baka kaba posted:

Banning stuff even the Victorians were ok with

Buttplugs and heroin. Those very much were the days.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 14:54

Ms Adequate: Oct 30, 2011; Baby even when I'm dead and gone
You will always be my only one, my only one
When the night is calling
No matter who I become
You will always be my only one, my only one, my only one
When the night is calling

The Victorians were absolutely filthy though. As long as you kept it behind closed doors, they would think modern 24/7 D/s relationships involving branding and scarification to be vanilla.

Anyway, glad my Leicester comment provoked a lot of discussion on that one loving building, and glad to see that I wasn't actually just an insane person hallucinating a geometric Lovecraftian horror near the train station.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 17:38

communism bitch: Apr 24, 2009

I quite like that big blue building. Cities need more colour and not to be tedious concrete, glass and redbrick.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 17:40

Rush Limbo: Sep 5, 2005; its with a full house

There were even enterprising souls who combined the two.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 17:40

Crashbee: May 15, 2007; Stupid people are great at winning arguments, because they're too stupid to realize they've lost.

Oberleutnant posted:

I quite like that big blue building. Cities need more colour and not to be tedious concrete, glass and redbrick.

It is actually right next to a tedious concrete and glass tower block so it does liven the place up I suppose.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 17:55

Kegluneq: Feb 18, 2011; Mr President, the physical reality of Prime Minister Corbyn is beyond your range of apprehension. If you'll just put on these PINKOVISION glasses...

Ddraig posted:

There were even enterprising souls who combined the two.

The Byker Wall, Newcastle. Built in the 1970s, now a Grade II listed building. Granted, it's part of the Functionalist Romantic rather than Brutalist tradition.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 17:57

Ms Adequate: Oct 30, 2011; Baby even when I'm dead and gone
You will always be my only one, my only one
When the night is calling
No matter who I become
You will always be my only one, my only one, my only one
When the night is calling

Kegluneq posted:

The Byker Wall, Newcastle. Built in the 1970s, now a Grade II listed building. Granted, it's part of the Functionalist Romantic rather than Brutalist tradition.

I thought Ddraig was referring to combining heroin and buttplugs, but what do you know, this works too.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 18:06

Phoon: Apr 23, 2010

I still think they should paint spaghetti junction a bunch of bright colours

# ? Dec 30, 2014 18:17

Rush Limbo: Sep 5, 2005; its with a full house

Kegluneq posted:

The Byker Wall, Newcastle. Built in the 1970s, now a Grade II listed building. Granted, it's part of the Functionalist Romantic rather than Brutalist tradition.

I was thinking more along the lines of the Victorian love for buttplugs and heroin :v:

# ? Dec 30, 2014 18:30

Kegluneq: Feb 18, 2011; Mr President, the physical reality of Prime Minister Corbyn is beyond your range of apprehension. If you'll just put on these PINKOVISION glasses...

Ddraig posted:

I was thinking more along the lines of the Victorian love for buttplugs and heroin

I imagine you could find both of those in Byker, if you knew where to look? (It's been a long day, I am bad reader)

# ? Dec 30, 2014 18:32

LemonDrizzle: Mar 28, 2012; neoliberal shithead

Buttplugs aside, there have been some other interesting bits of information from the national archives for 1985-86:

"OK, this is terrible policy but it's going to piss the unions off so we're doing it. Welcome to enlightened leadership."
http://www.thetimes.co.uk/tto/news/politics/article4309304.ece

quote:

Margaret Thatcher brought in GCSE exams in 1986 because she did not want to seem weak against the teaching unions. The former prime minister despised the exams � which have been sat by millions of pupils since then � because she thought they lacked rigour, offered more scope for teachers� �bias� and would create a �can�t-fail mentality�.
However, when teaching unions set their stall out against the reforms in the spring of 1986 the prime minister told an aide that the government now had �no option but to go ahead�.
For the past three decades leading Conservative politicians have sought to reform GCSEs, the latest being Michael Gove who, before being removed from his post, failed to replace the system.
His former special adviser, Dominic Cummings, said yesterday that the documents proved that it had been a �big mistake� for the Conservatives to have introduced GCSEs.

Sometimes civil servants understand policies and their implications better than ministers:
http://www.thetimes.co.uk/tto/news/politics/article4309282.ece

quote:

The country�s top civil servant warned of the �unscrupulous� activities of the City in the months before the Big Bang, which ushered in the �loadsamoney� era of conspicuous consumption.
Sir Robert Armstrong, the cabinet secretary, said in 1986 that financial sector reforms were giving rise to �increasing disquiet� about the practices and pay of City workers.
In a letter to Margaret Thatcher�s private office, Sir Robert said that people outside the City thought that �corners are being cut and money is being made in ways that are at least bordering on the unscrupulous�. He added that the �levels of remuneration� were a �bubble that will be pricked in a year or two�.

Grrr filthy lefty biased beeb:
http://www.thetimes.co.uk/tto/news/medianews/article4309365.ece

quote:

Margaret Thatcher waged a clandestine campaign to cut the BBC �down to size� in the mid-1980s because she believed that it was biased and flouted public decency, according to documents released today.
The former prime minister repeatedly criticised the size and liberal tendencies of the corporation and adopted several extraordinary strategies in her attempts to hit back.
This included attempts to woo BBC insiders and to make manufacturers fit new televisions with �descramblers� that could block its broadcasts. Tensions between the government and the broadcaster reached a head with the publication in 1986 of the Peacock report, which recommended privatising BBC Radio 1 and Radio 2 and forcing the corporation to collect the licence fee.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 18:34

Disinterested: Jun 29, 2011; You look like you're still raking it in. Still killing 'em?

http://www.irishtimes.com/news/ireland/state-papers/anglo-irish-agreement-a-triumph-of-persistence-and-backdoor-diplomacy-1.2043042

quote:

The 1985 Anglo-Irish Agreement was a triumph of persistence and backdoor diplomacy for the Dublin government, which was confronted with a divided British cabinet and an increasingly sceptical prime minister in Margaret Thatcher, it emerges in newly released British state papers.

The papers for 1985 released today demonstrate how Irish officials and taoiseach Garret FitzGerald kept up the pressure on the British throughout the year when Thatcher reluctantly conceded � at a meeting with the taoiseach in Milan in late June � it was too late to pull out of a deal.

On the plus side...

# ? Dec 30, 2014 18:37

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

I wonder what kind of poo poo is going to come out in 30 years' time about the current government. Or hell, even the Blair government.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 18:38

dadrips: Jan 8, 2010; everything you do is a balloon; College Slice

I did wonder why there was a whole new slew of murky, terrifying Thatcher news cropping up. One of my favourites so far has been present-day MP Oliver Letwin being a rabid cheerleader for instituting the poll tax in Scotland first because a) it's a really good idea, honest guv, no really and b) gently caress it, there's no tory seats in the frozen north, who cares? :downs:

A lot of people wonder why the independence referendum happened in the first place, shite like this is your answer.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 19:12

baka kaba: Jul 19, 2003; PLEASE ASK ME, THE SELF-PROFESSED NO #1 PAUL CATTERMOLE FAN IN THE SOMETHING AWFUL S-CLUB 7 MEGATHREAD, TO NAME A SINGLE SONG BY HIS EXCELLENT NU-METAL SIDE PROJECT, SKUA, AND IF I CAN'T PLEASE TELL ME TO
EAT SHIT

LemonDrizzle posted:

For the past three decades leading Conservative politicians have sought to reform GCSEs, the latest being Michael Gove who, before being removed from his post, failed to replace the system.
His former special adviser, Dominic Cummings, said yesterday that the documents proved that it had been a �big mistake� for the Conservatives to have introduced GCSEs.

Hmm yes, not proven by evidence or anything, just revealed through The Teachings of Thatcher, who's clearly someone to be trusted on things

# ? Dec 30, 2014 19:20

Ms Adequate: Oct 30, 2011; Baby even when I'm dead and gone
You will always be my only one, my only one
When the night is calling
No matter who I become
You will always be my only one, my only one, my only one
When the night is calling

dadrips posted:

I did wonder why there was a whole new slew of murky, terrifying Thatcher news cropping up. One of my favourites so far has been present-day MP Oliver Letwin being a rabid cheerleader for instituting the poll tax in Scotland first because a) it's a really good idea, honest guv, no really and b) gently caress it, there's no tory seats in the frozen north, who cares?

A lot of people wonder why the independence referendum happened in the first place, shite like this is your answer.

Christ, even plenty of the bloody Tories told everyone they could behind closed doors "No, this is a loving stupid idea, if you do it we'll be neck-deep in poo poo." but he pressed relentlessly ahead anyway.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 19:40

Gonzo McFee: Jun 19, 2010

Thatcher also worried that giving Catholics rights in Northern Ireland would result in it becoming a Marxist State.

http://www.channel4.com/news/n-ireland-thatcher-couldnt-understand-civil-rights-calls

quote:

Files marked "secret", just released in Dublin's National Archives, reveal that Mrs Thatcher was concerned that Northern Ireland was on the way to becoming a "Marxist society" and that she was warned against redrawing its borders to counter the perceived threat by Ireland's then Taoiseach Garret FitzGerald.

During a summit at Chequers in November 1984, Mrs Thatcher fretted about the wider consequences of addressing Catholic alienation in relation to ethnic minorities in Britain.

She said: "if these things were done, the next question would be what comes next? Were the Sikhs in Southall to be allowed to fly their own flag?" Southall is a west London suburb with a large Asian community which was the scene of a notorious race riot just three years earlier.

The Tory leader compared Irish nationalists in Northern Ireland to minority communities in other parts of Europe. She said that Macedonians, Croats, Serbs and Sudetan Germans were not claiming such comprehensive reforms in policing, justice, equality and power-sharing.

Within a decade of that meeting, Macedonia, Croatia and Serbia all declared independence, while Northern Ireland remained a part of the United Kingdom.

Mrs Thatcher expressed her incomprehension at what Irish nationalists wanted, saying she could not understand why a minority would seek "particular prerogatives as of right".

Mr FitzGerald, then leader of the Fine Gael party, said: "they cannot fly the flag of their own nation in their own country".

He explained that the minority felt Irish and part of the majority of the island of Ireland "from which they had been cut off by an arbitrary act".

The British had drawn a line around the six counties, creating a Protestant majority, cutting off the minority from the nation and people were "set against each other within a narrow space," he told Mrs Thatcher.

The Taoiseach added there was "hard evidence" of bias in the justice, security and policing systems in Northern Ireland while the guns of the British army's controversial Ulster Defence Regiment were being used to "bully" Catholics.

The Taoiseach asked his British counterpart where else in the world could one sixth of the population say they had relatives imprisoned.

Margaret Thatcher and then Irish Taoiseach Garret FitzGerald sign an Anglo-Irish agreement in 1985, one year after the talks

The death toll at that time was the equivalent of 100,000 in the UK, he said.

Mrs Thatcher mistakenly said there had been 2,500 deaths in the security forces, with Mr Fitzgerald correcting her that the majority were civilians, most of them Catholics.

Venting her fears that the North of Ireland was heading towards a Marxist state, Mrs Thatcher told the Taoiseach that resolving the crisis could mean "simply" moving the border.
'Fatal'

"She wondered if a possible answer to the problem might not simply be a redrawing of boundaries," records an official note of the top-level meeting, which has only just been declassified under the 30-year-rule.

But Taoiseach Mr FitzGerald immediately rejected the apparent offer, warning it would be a "fatal mistake". The pair later discussed a federal Belgium-style federal model, which Mrs Thatcher considered. But she rejected out of hand the idea of a power sharing agreement between the British and Irish governments, saying that it would effectively mean handing over 40 per cent of the country.

The prime minister said Catholics in Northern Ireland, who made up 40 per cent of the population, argued that they owed no allegiance to London "but they took the government's money".

They thought they were different to any other minority and were "drawing on resources which the Republic did not provide," she told Mr FitzGerald. "The nationalists feel that all they have to do is to wait."
'Out, out, out'

She accepted there were problems with Catholics getting jobs and admitted some areas - pointing to Lisburn as an example - "would not accept Catholics".

She added: "History shows that the Irish, whether the Scottish-Irish or the Irish-Irish, don't like to move. However, they all seem to be terribly happy to move to Britain."

Later the same day, in a press conference, Mrs Thatcher gave her infamous "out, out, out" declaration, when she rejected three options put forward from the Irish for a solution to Northern Ireland: Irish unity; a two-state federation; or joint authority.

It was later reported that Mr FitzGerald thought her behaviour was "gratuitously offensive".

She really doesn't seem to like the Irish. Or the Scots. Or the Welsh. Or any English who aren't from the Home Counties.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 20:39

Pesky Splinter: Feb 16, 2011; A worried pug.

KKKlean Energy posted:

I wonder what kind of poo poo is going to come out in 30 years' time about the current government. Or hell, even the Blair government.

Probably the most devious poo poo imaginable regarding the justifications of the Iraq war. And all those anti-terrorism laws enacted to "protect" us.
---
Any suggestions for the next thread title?

# ? Dec 30, 2014 20:51

TinTower: Apr 21, 2010; You don't have to 8e a good person to 8e a hero.

KKKlean Energy posted:

I wonder what kind of poo poo is going to come out in 30 years' time about the current government. Or hell, even the Blair government.

You're in luck, as the first Blair cabinet papers will be released in 2020, as the National Archives are moving to a 20 year rule.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 20:53

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

quote:

The Taoiseach asked his British counterpart where else in the world could one sixth of the population say they had relatives imprisoned.

Is the answer "Black America"?

# ? Dec 30, 2014 21:20

Disinterested: Jun 29, 2011; You look like you're still raking it in. Still killing 'em?

Guavanaut posted:

Is the answer "Black America"?

Winner winner chicken dinner.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 21:30

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

Disinterested posted:

Winner winner chicken dinner.

How very racist.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 22:04

Renaissance Robot: Oct 10, 2010; Bite my furry metal ass

LemonDrizzle posted:

Buttplugs aside, there have been some other interesting bits of information from the national archives for 1985-86:

"OK, this is terrible policy but it's going to piss the unions off so we're doing it. Welcome to enlightened leadership."
http://www.thetimes.co.uk/tto/news/politics/article4309304.ece

For fucks sake. And I thought the British left were pointlessly adversarial. What a bloody stupid waste.

Speaking of dumb political conflicts, what are all yalls thoughts on the Turner controversy? I only stumbled across it recently, but it seems like the kind of thing this thread would have Opinions on. His ideas of an agrarian utopia are aggressively idiotic, but the rest (hey guys maybe this whole socialist revolution thing will take a while longer than we'd like, also it's possible we don't have to literally murder the rich) is stuff that's been floated here before.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 23:41

Private Speech: Mar 30, 2011; I HAVE EVEN MORE WORTHLESS BEANIE BABIES IN MY COLLECTION THAN I HAVE WORTHLESS POSTS IN THE BEANIE BABY THREAD YET I STILL HAVE THE TEMERITY TO CRITICIZE OTHERS' COLLECTIONS

IF YOU SEE ME TALKING ABOUT BEANIE BABIES, PLEASE TELL ME TO

EAT. SHIT.

If you ever wanted to know if the country is more or less equal than in 1986 then you are in luck, because the government has published a useful graphic to help:

Except that you have to ignore the top and bottom data points that they so helpfully point out, because both are caused by legislative distortions - specifically minimum wage (which the tories thought hard against) and lower taxes rates courtesy of Thatcher.

Now, you might say, top decile receiving about double the benefit of the bottom one isn't so bad. Except that adjusted for inflation GDP is roughly 80% higher than in 1986. Meaning that only about 65% of the growth is reflected in growing wage, with the rest going almost exclusively to the top 10% (and majority of which to the top 1%).

The only thing worse is the overall asset distribution. While the amount of assets held by the bottom 50% of the population has always been very low, standing at 10% in 1986, it has been lowered to less than 5% by 2013. And it cannot be meaningfully computed for lowest deciles because of negative equity. :unsmigghh:

# ? Dec 30, 2014 23:43

communism bitch: Apr 24, 2009

Renaissance Robot posted:

also it's possible we don't have to literally murder the rich

dis

# ? Dec 30, 2014 23:45

Renaissance Robot: Oct 10, 2010; Bite my furry metal ass

You can metaphorically murder them by seizing their assets and stuffing them in a cozy council house, how's that?

TinTower posted:

You're in luck, as the first Blair cabinet papers will be released in 2020, as the National Archives are moving to a 20 year rule.

I will be very surprised if he doesn't attempt to pull some flimsy excuse out of his arse to have the date continually pushed back. (I'm sure this was done previously on some FOI thing, can't recall for the life of me though)

# ? Dec 30, 2014 23:47

namesake: Jun 19, 2006; "When I was a girl, around 12 or 13, I had a fantasy that I'd grow up to marry Captain Scarlet, but he'd be busy fighting the Mysterons so I'd cuckold him with the sexiest people I could think of - Nigel Mansell, Pat Sharp and Mr. Blobby."

Private Speech posted:

Now, you might say, top decile receiving about double the benefit of the bottom one isn't so bad. Except that adjusted for inflation GDP is roughly 80% higher than in 1986. Meaning that only about 65% of the growth is reflected in growing wage, with the rest going almost exclusively to the top 10% (and majority of which to the top 1%).

The graphic says the 1986 figures are already adjusted for inflation so those gains are real gains, I'm not sure how you've gotten that 65%. Also this is hourly pay, not income so the gain for the top decile will be even greater due to capital gains and such, as you sort of mention.

# ? Dec 30, 2014 23:53

Private Speech: Mar 30, 2011; I HAVE EVEN MORE WORTHLESS BEANIE BABIES IN MY COLLECTION THAN I HAVE WORTHLESS POSTS IN THE BEANIE BABY THREAD YET I STILL HAVE THE TEMERITY TO CRITICIZE OTHERS' COLLECTIONS

IF YOU SEE ME TALKING ABOUT BEANIE BABIES, PLEASE TELL ME TO

EAT. SHIT.

namesake posted:

The graphic says the 1986 figures are already adjusted for inflation so those gains are real gains, I'm not sure how you've gotten that 65%. Also this is hourly pay, not income so the gain for the top decile will be even greater due to capital gains and such, as you sort of mention.

Which is exactly what I am saying? It says specifically in terms of wages. And the 65% is the difference between increase in GDP and median wage - i.e. mostly capital gains. Admittedly not all of that goes towards capital gains income (or even stays in the UK) but fair chunk of it does.

Edit: I'm not in any way disputing that there has been an increase in wages in real terms for everyone (as is the case in practically every country in the world because of better technology) - although even taking the above disparity in income growth into account, the amount of assets (per capita) held by the bottom 50% of the society has actually decreased since then.

Private Speech fucked around with this message at 00:32 on Dec 31, 2014

# ? Dec 31, 2014 00:01

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# ? May 4, 2024 23:35

communism bitch: Apr 24, 2009

Bottom 10% Crew represent :whatup:

# ? Dec 31, 2014 00:05

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT December - Poorly Moderated by the 81st Most Powerful Person in the UK Media

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