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Falstaff Infection
Oct 1, 2014
We've all got favorite authors and novels. I think it's also fair to say that anybody who reads with any frequency has particular segments within novels that they love, whether because of a particular mood that's evoked, a certain turn of phrase, or a mind-blowing plot development. This thread is for all of us to chronicle our favorite book-chunks, be they chapters, pages, or just paragraphs. Feel free to say what it is you like about something, too. I'll start:

- The Triumph of Death from Underworld-- Underworld is a great work, but it (somewhat unfortunately) peaks within the first 50 or so pages. But what pages they are. The chapter is told from the point of view of a variety of observers (including J. Edgar Hoover) at the famed 1951 Dodgers/Giants Pennant game. It's fantastically written, and there's something almost mystical in the way it captures the mingled hope and terror that characterized the beginning of the Cold War.

- The chapter about farm evictions from The Grapes of Wrath-- Occurs early in the book, and doesn't have a lot to do with the main plot, but it portrays the callousness and inhumanity of corporate capitalism in plain, but searing language.

- The last chapter of the Great Gatsby-- This is probably where literature peaked. It's super sad and super beautiful.

- The Red Wedding chapter from a Storm of Swords-- Yeah, this is a goony pick, but gently caress you. It's definitive.

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Falstaff Infection
Oct 1, 2014
Oh, and Henry IV act II scene iv, where Falstaff role-plays king Henry and tells Hal hilarious lies about the army of bandits in "buckram suits."

CestMoi
Sep 16, 2011

That bit in that one book I like: YOu know the one.

That other bit in a different book: Oh yeahh that's the poo poo.

Falstaff Infection
Oct 1, 2014

CestMoi posted:

That bit in that one book I like: YOu know the one.

That other bit in a different book: Oh yeahh that's the poo poo.

You're right about the first one. Except that other bit sucks. So trite.

Earwicker
Jan 6, 2003

In Black Lamb and Grey Falcon by Rebecca West, there is a brilliant passage about how Franz Ferdinand essentially created his own fate.

It starts with a discussion about how the Archduke was a famed hunter, not so much for his skill but simply sheer volume of woodland creatures he was able to kill. He accomplished this by hiring a number of "beaters" who would go out into the woods and by making noise flush the animals towards him, at which point he would shoot them. This was of course a common practice, but apparently the Archduke had come up with some particular formula or positioning for these beaters that allowed him to kill the animals with surprising efficiency.

West then describes how, point by point, both Ferdinand's alienation from the rest of the Habsburg court and his attitude and action towards Slavic independence movements in the Balkans was setting up a set of these "beaters" which then drove him irreversibly into the situation which resulted his own assassination.

It's a rather long passage that goes through each blunder or "beater" at a time and expounds in it, but extremely well done and one of the more unique descriptions of some of the underlying causes of the first World War, or at least the tensions which sparked the initial conflict between Austria and Serbia.

Falstaff Infection posted:

- The last chapter of the Great Gatsby-- This is probably where literature peaked

:psyduck:

Effectronica
May 31, 2011
Fallen Rib

William Faulkner posted:

My mother is a fish.

Falstaff Infection
Oct 1, 2014

Earwicker posted:

In Black Lamb and Grey Falcon by Rebecca West, there is a brilliant passage about how Franz Ferdinand essentially created his own fate.

It starts with a discussion about how the Archduke was a famed hunter, not so much for his skill but simply sheer volume of woodland creatures he was able to kill. He accomplished this by hiring a number of "beaters" who would go out into the woods and by making noise flush the animals towards him, at which point he would shoot them. This was of course a common practice, but apparently the Archduke had come up with some particular formula or positioning for these beaters that allowed him to kill the animals with surprising efficiency.

West then describes how, point by point, both Ferdinand's alienation from the rest of the Habsburg court and his attitude and action towards Slavic independence movements in the Balkans was setting up a set of these "beaters" which then drove him irreversibly into the situation which resulted his own assassination.

It's a rather long passage that goes through each blunder or "beater" at a time and expounds in it, but extremely well done and one of the more unique descriptions of some of the underlying causes of the first World War, or at least the tensions which sparked the initial conflict between Austria and Serbia.


:psyduck:

Never read anything by Rebecca West, but now she's on my list! Anything else of hers that's worth checking out? Is Black Lamb and Grey Falcon the best place to start?

(and I was being like 90% facetious about literature peaking with TGG. I actually find it kind of middling most of the way through, I just really love that last chapter.)

Falstaff Infection fucked around with this message at 23:45 on Dec 7, 2014

Earwicker
Jan 6, 2003

Falstaff Infection posted:

Never read anything by Rebecca West, but now she's on my list! Anything else of hers that's worth checking out? Is Black Lamb or Grey Falcon the bet place to start?

It's the only thing by her I've read so far. I loved it, but it's also very long and if you aren't interested in Balkan history it's probably not for you, but if you are interested in it, it's fascinating. She's a very great and insightful writer.

On top of that, the book largely follows her travels through Yugoslavia in 1937. So, only a few years after the book was written, Germany invaded, nearly destroyed Serbia, set up a puppet state in Croatia, etc. but at the time the book was written, no one knew this was about to happen.

There is a lot of tension of course, but she and her husband still encounter German tourists on various trains and boats etc. who are just there on vacation, the Croats and Serbs and Bosniaks that she hangs around with are clearly somewhat cross with one another about various pieces of history, but not in such a way that it looks like war is right around the corner. Everyday life is still normal (mostly) all over the country, and it's very unnerving to look at this very detailed portrait of a land living its daily routines with this huge unknown destruction right around the corner.

Earwicker fucked around with this message at 23:54 on Dec 7, 2014

anilEhilated
Feb 17, 2014

But I say fuck the rain.

Grimey Drawer
It's not exactly (or at all) high literature, but I love the prose in the opening of The Scar by China Miéville. People often think he uses obscure words just for the sake of using obscure words, but those four pages of undersea scenery set the mood for the book perfectly and I reread them a couple times whenever I pick the book up.
Right, now I'll take my plebiean SF out of the place.

Earwicker
Jan 6, 2003

Here is a sentence by James Joyce that I like a lot, from Portrait of the Artist as Young Man:

James Joyce posted:

Glimmering and trembling, trembling and unfolding, a breaking light, an opening flower, it spread in endless succession to itself, breaking in full crimson and unfolding and fading to palest rose, leaf by leaf and wave of light by wave of light, flooding all the heavens with its soft flushes, every flush deeper than the other.

Falstaff Infection
Oct 1, 2014

anilEhilated posted:

It's not exactly (or at all) high literature, but I love the prose in the opening of The Scar by China Miéville. People often think he uses obscure words just for the sake of using obscure words, but those four pages of undersea scenery set the mood for the book perfectly and I reread them a couple times whenever I pick the book up.
Right, now I'll take my plebiean SF out of the place.

poo poo, that reminds me! The chapter in Kraken which describes the strike of the familiars union is genius. It's a perfect example of Mieville's ability to come up with crazy, unique fantasy concepts. He also lets his Trot flag fly freely in that one, which I love. Shame I found the rest of the book kind of overstuffed. It ended up feeling like he had all these great ideas and concepts but hadn't thought a great deal about how to tie them all together in a coherent plot.

Sally
Jan 9, 2007


Don't post Small Dash!

Falstaff Infection posted:

Oh, and Henry IV act II scene iv, where Falstaff role-plays king Henry and tells Hal hilarious lies about the army of bandits in "buckram suits."

They aren't role-playing at that point, but that bit of back and forth is still hilarious. Also, at the end of the role-play when Hal says "I do, I will". drat.

drat.

Falstaff Infection
Oct 1, 2014

Blind Sally posted:

They aren't role-playing at that point, but that bit of back and forth is still hilarious. Also, at the end of the role-play when Hal says "I do, I will". drat.

drat.

Yeah, I know those are two separate exchanges, but they're both in the same scene. My wording was kinda muddled though. And yeah, "I do, I will," is some cold poo poo. I saw a production of Henry IV once in Barnsdale park (Los Angeles) and everybody was sort of amateurish except the dude who played Hal. He looked a little bit like Alan Cumming, and the way he said that line gave me chills.

Avshalom
Feb 14, 2012

by Lowtax
The scene in One Hundred Years of Solitude where Fernanda rants at Aureliano Segundo for three pages in one long, unbroken sentence, and he goes berserk and smashes all her flowerpots, is probably my favourite thing ever written.

Beefeater1980
Sep 12, 2008

My God, it's full of Horatios!






Genre fiction has a few moments of beauty. Case in point, from Tom Holt; a man is chatting up a woman, when he loses interest in talking to her in favour of listening to himself talking:

"The young man hadn't heard her. He was looking through her, as if she were a ghost, to the distant but irresistible vision of his own cleverness."

I LOVE the expression "the distant but irresistible vision of his own cleverness." It's such a perfect summation of someone who started out talking to you and ended up listening to themselves.

Zalakwe
Jun 4, 2007
Likes Cake, Hates Hamsters



I'm a big fan of good opening lines, a couple of my favourites are:

Ian Banks (The Crow Road) - "It was the day my grandmother exploded."
Kurt Vonnegut (Slaughterhouse 5) - "Listen: Billy Pilgrim has become unstuck in time."

Both address the reader directly, both contain a dramatic action and both lead to further questions. Probably left their two agents with massive grins.

Falstaff Infection
Oct 1, 2014

Zalakwe posted:

I'm a big fan of good opening lines, a couple of my favourites are:

Ian Banks (The Crow Road) - "It was the day my grandmother exploded."
Kurt Vonnegut (Slaughterhouse 5) - "Listen: Billy Pilgrim has become unstuck in time."

Both address the reader directly, both contain a dramatic action and both lead to further questions. Probably left their two agents with massive grins.

Yeah, the Slaughterhouse-Five opening is perfect. I also love closing lines-- the one from Huckleberry Finn is a pretty great one, for example.

Nitevision
Oct 5, 2004

Your Friendly FYAD Helper
Ask Me For FYAD Help
Another Reason To Talk To Me Is To Hangout
She turns. "Hold up my fur." He obeys. "Be careful. Don't touch my skin." Earlier in this game she was nervous, constipated, wondering if this was anything like male impotence. But thoughtful Pointsman, anticipating this, has been sending laxative pills with her meals. Now her intestines whine softly, and she feels poo poo begin to slide down and out. He kneels with his arms up holding the rich cape. A dark turd appears out the crevice, out of the absolute darkness between her white buttocks. He spreads his knees, awkwardly, until he can feel the leather of her boots. He leans forward to surround the hot turd with his lips, sucking on it tenderly, licking along its lower side ... he is thinking, he's sorry, he can't help it, thinking of a Negro's penis, yes he knows it abrogates part of the conditions set, but it will not be denied, the image of a brute African who will make him behave. . . . The stink of poo poo floods his nose, gathering him, surrounding. It is the smell of Passchendaele, of the Salient. Mixed with the mud, and the putrefaction of corpses, it was the sovereign smell of their first meeting, and her emblem. The turd slides into his mouth, down to his gullet. He gags, but bravely clamps his teeth shut. Bread that would only have floated in porcelain waters somewhere, unseen, untasted—risen now and baked in the bitter intestinal Oven to bread we know, bread that's light as domestic comfort, secret as death in bed . . . Spasms in his throat continue. The pain is terrible. With his tongue he mashes poo poo against the roof of his mouth and begins to chew, thickly now, the only sound in the room. . . .

Walh Hara
May 11, 2012
I loved this passage in Albert Camus' l'étranger, especially the last sentence.
A translation I found:

quote:

Then everything began to reel before my eyes, a fiery gust came from the sea, while the sky
cracked in two, from end to end, and a great sheet of flame poured down through the rift. Every
nerve in my body was a steel spring, and my grip closed on the revolver. The trigger gave, and
the smooth underbelly of the butt jogged my palm. And so, with that crisp, whipcrack sound, it
all began. I shook off my sweat and the clinging veil of light. I knew I'd shattered the balance of
the day, the spacious calm of this beach on which I had been happy. But I fired four shots more
into the inert body, on which they left no visible trace. And each successive shot was another
loud, fateful rap on the door of my undoing.

The original (which I read) is of course better and makes more sense.

quote:

Cette épée brûlante rongeait mes cils et fouillait mes yeux douloureux. C'est alors que tout a vacillé. La mer a charrié un
souffle épais et ardent. Il m'a semblé que le ciel s'ouvrait sur toute son étendue pour
laisser pleuvoir du feu. Tout mon être s'est tendu et j'ai crispé ma main sur le revolver.
La gâchette a cédé, j'ai touché le ventre poli de la crosse et c'est là, dans le bruit à la
fois sec et assourdissant, que tout a commencé. J'ai secoué la sueur et le soleil. J'ai
compris que j'avais détruit l'équilibre du jour, le silence exceptionnel d'une plage où
j'avais été heureux. Alors, j'ai tiré encore quatre fois sur un corps inerte où les balles
s'enfonçaient sans qu'il y parût. Et c'était comme quatre coups brefs que je frappais sur
la porte du malheur.


I also like the passage with the last rites of Bokononism in Cat's Cradle. (you can find the rites here: http://www.cs.uni.edu/~wallingf/personal/bokonon.html#alsobybokonon)

Falstaff Infection
Oct 1, 2014

Nitevision posted:

She turns. "Hold up my fur." He obeys. "Be careful. Don't touch my skin." Earlier in this game she was nervous, constipated, wondering if this was anything like male impotence. But thoughtful Pointsman, anticipating this, has been sending laxative pills with her meals. Now her intestines whine softly, and she feels poo poo begin to slide down and out. He kneels with his arms up holding the rich cape. A dark turd appears out the crevice, out of the absolute darkness between her white buttocks. He spreads his knees, awkwardly, until he can feel the leather of her boots. He leans forward to surround the hot turd with his lips, sucking on it tenderly, licking along its lower side ... he is thinking, he's sorry, he can't help it, thinking of a Negro's penis, yes he knows it abrogates part of the conditions set, but it will not be denied, the image of a brute African who will make him behave. . . . The stink of poo poo floods his nose, gathering him, surrounding. It is the smell of Passchendaele, of the Salient. Mixed with the mud, and the putrefaction of corpses, it was the sovereign smell of their first meeting, and her emblem. The turd slides into his mouth, down to his gullet. He gags, but bravely clamps his teeth shut. Bread that would only have floated in porcelain waters somewhere, unseen, untasted—risen now and baked in the bitter intestinal Oven to bread we know, bread that's light as domestic comfort, secret as death in bed . . . Spasms in his throat continue. The pain is terrible. With his tongue he mashes poo poo against the roof of his mouth and begins to chew, thickly now, the only sound in the room. . . .

Yikes. Maybe I should start a "Favorite Coprophagia in Literature" thread? It could have this, 120 Days of Sodom, Hogg (sweet jesus is that book upsetting.)

Shibawanko
Feb 13, 2013

"He never cried, not even in his dreams, for hard-heartedness was a point of pride. A large iron anchor withstanding the corrosion of the sea and scornful of the barnacles and oysters that harass the hulls of ships, sinking polished and indifferent through heaps of broken glass, toothless combs, bottle caps, and prophylactics into the mud at harbour bottom – that was how he liked to imagine his heart. Someday he would have an anchor tattooed on his chest."

Khizan
Jul 30, 2013


Zalakwe posted:

I'm a big fan of good opening lines, a couple of my favourites are:

"The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed."

Popular Human
Jul 17, 2005

and if it's a lie, terrorists made me say it

Gene Wolfe, The Citadel of the Autarch posted:

What struck me on the beach–and it struck me indeed, so that I staggered as at a blow–was that if the Eternal Principle had rested in that curved thorn I had carried about my neck across so many leagues, and if it now rested in the new thorn (perhaps the same thorn) I had only now put there, then it might rest in everything, in every thorn in every bush, in every drop of water in the sea. The thorn was a sacred Claw because all thorns were sacred Claws; the sand in my boots was sacred sand because it came from a beach of sacred sand. The cenobites treasured up the relics of the sannyasins because the sannyasins had approached the Pancreator. But everything had approached and even touched the Pancreator, because everything had dropped from his hand. Everything was a relic. All the world was a relic. I drew off my boots, that had traveled with me so far, and threw them into the waves that I might not walk shod on holy ground.

Kraps
Sep 9, 2011

This avatar was paid for by the Silent Majority.
The in-story bit where Dahl interacts with Jenkins' wife and the third coda in Redshirts. Those parts are just so... nice, beautiful even, and a great and surprising contrast to the sheer fun and wackiness of the rest of the book.

Falstaff Infection
Oct 1, 2014

Shibawanko posted:

"He never cried, not even in his dreams, for hard-heartedness was a point of pride. A large iron anchor withstanding the corrosion of the sea and scornful of the barnacles and oysters that harass the hulls of ships, sinking polished and indifferent through heaps of broken glass, toothless combs, bottle caps, and prophylactics into the mud at harbour bottom – that was how he liked to imagine his heart. Someday he would have an anchor tattooed on his chest."

What's this from?

Popular Human
Jul 17, 2005

and if it's a lie, terrorists made me say it

Falstaff Infection posted:

What's this from?

Ooh, oooh, I recognize this one!

It's from The Sailor Who Fell From Grace With the Sea by Yukio Mishima.

Jive One
Sep 11, 2001

Antony's speech in Julius Caesar.

quote:

Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears;
I come to bury Caesar, not to praise him.
The evil that men do lives after them;
The good is oft interred with their bones;
So let it be with Caesar. The noble Brutus
Hath told you Caesar was ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Caesar answer'd it.
Here, under leave of Brutus and the rest--
For Brutus is an honourable man;
So are they all, all honourable men--
Come I to speak in Caesar's funeral.
He was my friend, faithful and just to me:
But Brutus says he was ambitious;
And Brutus is an honourable man.
He hath brought many captives home to Rome
Whose ransoms did the general coffers fill:
Did this in Caesar seem ambitious?
When that the poor have cried, Caesar hath wept:
Ambition should be made of sterner stuff:
Yet Brutus says he was ambitious;
And Brutus is an honourable man.
You all did see that on the Lupercal
I thrice presented him a kingly crown,
Which he did thrice refuse: was this ambition?
Yet Brutus says he was ambitious;
And, sure, he is an honourable man.
I speak not to disprove what Brutus spoke,
But here I am to speak what I do know.
You all did love him once, not without cause:
What cause withholds you then, to mourn for him?
O judgment! thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason. Bear with me;
My heart is in the coffin there with Caesar,
And I must pause till it come back to me.

And this little poem from Journey to the West.

quote:

Excellent, truly excellent,
The virtuous come to no harm.
The good heart is always mindful,
The way of goodness always lies open.
Do not allow evil thoughts to arise;
Thus you will avoid all trouble.
Say not that there is no retribution;
Whether you become a god or a ghost is all determined.

Jive One fucked around with this message at 05:28 on Dec 10, 2014

Oxxidation
Jul 22, 2007
The razing of Pachigam from Shalimar the Clown, where a peaceful Kashmiri village that serves as the main setting for like 3/4's of the novel finally gets set upon by the Indian army. The woman mentioned in the passage is the title character's mother. Fun times!

quote:

Who lit that fire? Who burned that orchard? Who shot those brothers who laughed their whole lives long? Who killed the sarpanch? Who broke his hands? Who broke his arms? Who broke his ancient neck? Who shackled those men? Who made those men disappear? Who shot those boys? Who shot those girls? Who smashed that house? Who smashed that house? Who smashed that house? Who killed that youth? Who clubbed that grandmother? Who knifed that aunt? Who broke that old man's nose? Who broke that young girl's heart? Who killed the lover? Who shot his fiancee? Who burned the costumes? Who broke the swords? Who burned the library? Who burned the saffron field? Who burned the beehives? Who poisoned the paddies? Who killed the children? Who whipped the parents? Who raped that lazy-eyed woman? Who raped that lazy-eyed woman as she screamed about snake vengeance? Who raped that woman again? Who raped that woman again? Who raped that woman again? Who raped that dead woman? Who raped that dead woman again?

...What happened that day in Pachigam need not be set down here in full detail, because brutality is brutality and excess is excess and that's all there is to it. There are things that must be looked at indirectly because they would blind you if you looked them in the face, like the fire of the sun. So, to repeat: there is no Pachigam anymore. Pachigam was destroyed. Imagine it for yourself.

Second attempt: The village of Pachigam still existed on maps of Kashmir, but on that day it ceased to exist anywhere else, except in memory.

Third and final attempt: The beautiful village of Pachigam still exists.

Oxxidation fucked around with this message at 06:12 on Dec 10, 2014

Zalakwe
Jun 4, 2007
Likes Cake, Hates Hamsters



Khizan posted:

"The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed."

The sad thing about that brilliant opening is that it might just be the highlight of the whole series. For me the Gunslinger was the best novel by a country mile. Although there were other good moments it never quite managed to achieve the same atmosphere again.

Oxxidation posted:

The razing of Pachigam from Shalimar the Clown, where a peaceful Kashmiri village that serves as the main setting for like 3/4's of the novel finally gets set upon by the Indian army. The woman mentioned in the passage is the title character's mother. Fun times!

That's some powerful stuff.

Zalakwe fucked around with this message at 15:16 on Dec 11, 2014

Falstaff Infection
Oct 1, 2014

Jive One posted:

Antony's speech in Julius Caesar.


JC has never been my favorite Shakespeare, but that's a drat good speech. I love how many different registries Shakespeare can speak in-- he can do sincerity, he can do sophistry, he can do them both at once.

mdemone
Mar 14, 2001

Nitevision posted:

She turns. "Hold up my fur." He obeys. "Be careful. Don't touch my skin." Earlier in this game she was nervous, constipated, wondering if this was anything like male impotence. But thoughtful Pointsman, anticipating this, has been sending laxative pills with her meals. Now her intestines whine softly, and she feels poo poo begin to slide down and out. He kneels with his arms up holding the rich cape. A dark turd appears out the crevice, out of the absolute darkness between her white buttocks. He spreads his knees, awkwardly, until he can feel the leather of her boots. He leans forward to surround the hot turd with his lips, sucking on it tenderly, licking along its lower side ... he is thinking, he's sorry, he can't help it, thinking of a Negro's penis, yes he knows it abrogates part of the conditions set, but it will not be denied, the image of a brute African who will make him behave. . . . The stink of poo poo floods his nose, gathering him, surrounding. It is the smell of Passchendaele, of the Salient. Mixed with the mud, and the putrefaction of corpses, it was the sovereign smell of their first meeting, and her emblem. The turd slides into his mouth, down to his gullet. He gags, but bravely clamps his teeth shut. Bread that would only have floated in porcelain waters somewhere, unseen, untasted—risen now and baked in the bitter intestinal Oven to bread we know, bread that's light as domestic comfort, secret as death in bed . . . Spasms in his throat continue. The pain is terrible. With his tongue he mashes poo poo against the roof of his mouth and begins to chew, thickly now, the only sound in the room. . . .

Of all the iconic scenes in the greatest postwar novel yet written, you just had to pick that one.

Speaking of Pynchon, the part where Mason & Dixon meet the Learn'd English Dog has always stuck with me. The Mechanickal Duck is great, too. He does absurdity as well as anyone ever has.

Chamberk
Jan 11, 2004

when there is nothing left to burn you have to set yourself on fire
From Robert Penn Warren's All the King's Men:

“I got an image in my head that never got out. We see a great many things and can remember a great many things, but that is different. We get very few of the true images in our heads of the kind I am talking about, the kind that become more and more vivid for us as if the passage of the years did not obscure their reality but, year by year, drew off another veil to expose a meaning which we had only dimly surmised at first. Very probably the last veil will not be removed, for there are not enough years, but the brightness of the image increases and our conviction increases that the brightness is meaning, or the legend of meaning, and without the image our lives would be nothing except an old piece of film rolled on a spool and thrown into a desk drawer among the unanswered letters.”

Probably Magic
Oct 9, 2012

Looking cute, feeling cute.

Falstaff Infection posted:

- The last chapter of the Great Gatsby-- This is probably where literature peaked. It's super sad and super beautiful.

Well, I wouldn't call it the peak, since that was clearly the Star Wars extended universe novel Vector Prime, but I've always had a fondness for the passage where Nick's quiet fury at Tom dissipates into acceptance.

quote:

I couldn’t forgive him or like him, but I saw that what he had done was, to him, entirely justified. It was all very careless and confused. They were careless people, Tom and Daisy — they smashed up things and creatures and then retreated back into their money or their vast carelessness, or whatever it was that kept them together, and let other people clean up the mess they had made. . . .

I shook hands with him; it seemed silly not to, for I felt suddenly as though I were talking to a child. Then he went into the jewelry store to buy a pearl necklace — or perhaps only a pair of cuff buttons — rid of my provincial squeamishness forever.

Hieronymous Alloy
Jan 30, 2009


Why! Why!! Why must you refuse to accept that Dr. Hieronymous Alloy's Genetically Enhanced Cream Corn Is Superior to the Leading Brand on the Market!?!




Morbid Hound
First, a quote from a critical essay I imagine most of you recognize:

quote:

Even modern fairy-stories can produce this effect sometimes. It is not an easy thing to do; it
depends on the whole story which is the setting of the turn, and yet it reflects a glory backwards.
A tale that in any measure succeeds in this point has not wholly failed, whatever flaws it may
possess, and whatever mixture or confusion of purpose. It happens even in Andrew Lang's own
fairy-story, Prince Prigio, unsatisfactory in many ways as that is. When “each knight came alive
and lifted his sword and shouted ‘long live Prince Prigio,’ ” the joy has a little of that strange
mythical fairy-story quality, greater than the event described. It would have none in Lang's tale,
if the event described were not a piece of more serious fairystory “fantasy” than the main bulk of
the story, which is in general more frivolous, having the half-mocking smile of the courtly,
sophisticated Conte. Far more powerful and poignant is the effect in a serious tale of Faërie. In
such stories when the sudden “turn” comes we get a piercing glimpse of joy, and heart's desire,
that for a moment passes outside the frame, rends indeed the very web of story, and lets a gleam
come through.

“Seven long years I served for thee,
The glassy hill I clamb for thee,
The bluidy shirt I wrang for thee,
And wilt thou not wauken and turn to me?”
He heard and turned to her.


Then, a sequence of scenes from the Aubrey/Maturin series, involving the relationship between Stephen Maturin, one of the protagonists, a learned physician, and his . . intellectually disabled. . manservant Padeen Colman. He treats Padeen for severe burns with opium, and Padeen becomes addicted and is transported to Australia. Years (?) and oceans later, Stephen is in Australia and thinks to check up on Padeen.

quote:

‘If he does not object,’ said Stephen, ‘I should very much like to read it, when my mind is at rest. But Martin my mind is not at rest. You know my concern for Padeen.’
‘Of course I do, and I share it. I was there, you recall, when first he came aboard, poor dear fellow, and I have liked him ever since. You have news of him?’
‘I have. Adams went to the man John Paulton told us about, and this is the record he was given.’ He handed the paper. It looked something like a business account, with amounts carried forward from one column to another, but the numbers were those of lashes, days of close confinement in the black hole, the weight of punishment-irons and their duration.
‘Oh my God,’ said Martin, grasping its full significance.
‘Two hundred lashes… it is utterly inhuman.’
‘This is an utterly inhuman place. The social contract is destroyed; and the damage that must do to people much under the rank of saint is incalculable,’ said Stephen. ‘But listen,
Martin, he is soon to be assigned to the flogging parson I met at Government House, and the clerk, an old experienced hand, a ticket-of-leave man, says he will not survive that regimen above a year. Now my impression is that Mr Paulton told us that the clerks could change an assignment - that Painter himself had sent valuable farm servants rather than ignorant townspeople to Woolloo-Woolloo, presumably for a douceur.’
‘That is my impression too.’
‘He was quite right about information. Painter was obliging, quick and efficient. So what I very earnestly beg you will do is to go back to Mr Paulton tomorrow, put Padeen’s case
candidly before him and ask first whether Painter is indeed capable of changing the assignment and secondly whether he-your friend - would agree to receive Padeen at WoolbooWoolloo when he returns to take charge.’
‘Of course: I shall go as soon as he is likely to be up. Do you mean to see Padeen?’
‘I am turning the question in my mind. Inclination says yes, obviously: caution says no, for fear of an outbreak on his part, for fear of attracting attention to what must pass unnoticed.
But caution I know is an old woman at times; and I am still undecided.’
He lay undecided much of the night, sometimes reading Paulton’s MS, sometimes reflecting on the wisest course . . .

* * * * *

quote:

When they came nearer Dawes Point Redfern’s cheerfulness declined and he said ‘I am ashamed to display this hospital in all its squalid nakedness. Happily Governor and Mrs Macquarie are engaged on a new building.’ As they walked in he said ‘Colman is in the small ward on the right. His back is healing, but there is a dejection of spirits and an utter neglect of food that makes me anxious: I hope your visit may comfort him.’
‘Do you happen to know whether there are any other Irishmen in the ward?’
‘Not now. We lost both others a week ago, and since then he has had almost no company. His dysphony increases in English, what little English he has.’
‘Certainly. On a good day he is positively fluent in Irish, and he sings it without a check.’
‘You speak the language, sir, I collect?’
‘Indifferently; it is a child’s knowledge, no more. But he understands me.’
‘I shall leave you together while I look at the other men with my attendants: you will feel no constraint, I trust.’
There was a gathering in the hall and then they went in, Redfern accompanied by his dresser and two nurses. Padeen, was on the right hand, at the end of a row of quite wide-spaced beds, by the window. He was lying on his belly, so nearly asleep that he did not move when Redfern drew back the sheet covering him. ‘As you see,’ said Redfern, ‘the skin is healing - little inflammation: bone almost entirely covered. Earlier floggings had rendered it coriaceous. We treat with tepid sponging and wool-fat. Mr Herold’ - to the dresser - ‘we will leave Colman for the moment and see to the amputations.’
It was not the half-flayed back that wounded Stephen, who like any naval surgeon had seen the results of many a flogging, though never on such a monstrous scale, so much as the extreme emaciation. Padeen had been a fine upstanding fellow, thirteen or fourteen stone, perhaps: now his ribs stood out under the scars and he would barely weigh eight. Padeen’s face was turned towards him on the pillow: eyes closed, head skull-like.
Stephen laid a firm, authoritative medical hand on his back and said low in his ear ‘Never stir now. God and Mary be with you, Padeen.’
‘God and Mary and Patrick be with you, Doctor,’ came the slow, almost dreaming reply: the eye opened, a singularly sweet smile lit that famine-time face and he said ‘I knew you would come.’ He held Stephen’s hand.
‘Quiet, now, Padeen,’ said Stephen: he waited until the convulsive trembling had stopped and went on, ‘Listen, Padeen, my dear. Say nothing to any man at all, nothing. But you are going to a place where you will be more kindly treated, and there I shall see you again. There I shall see you again. Till then you must eat all you can, do you hear me now, Padeen. And till then God be with you, God and Mary be with you.’
Stephen walked out, more moved than he bad believed possible; and still, as he walked back to the ship after a particularly interesting conversation with Dr Redfern, he found that his mind was not as cool and steady as he could have wished. A lorikeet, or what he took for a lorikeet, flying from a clump of banksia changed its current for a moment. So did the sound of music in the cabin, which he heard well before he crossed the brow.

Years more pass, and Stephen (along with Padeen) returns home to England after a years-long see voyage. Once home, he finds that his wife, Diana, has run away, and left his daughter behind; he meets his daughter for the first time.

quote:

Clarissa led them slowly, almost as it were reluctantly, quite through its length and then turned right-handed into a carpeted room with candles and a fire. A small girl was building cardhouses on a table near the grate.
Clarissa murmured ‘Do not mind if she does not speak,’ and Stephen could feel the controlled anguish in her voice.
The girl at the table was lit by the fire and two candles: she was three-quarters turned towards Stephen and he saw a slim fair-haired child, quite extraordinarily beautiful: but with a disquieting, elfin, changeling beauty. Her movements as she handled the cards were perfectly coordinated; she glanced at Stephen and the others for a moment without the least interest, almost without ceasing to place her cards, and then carried on with the fifth storey.
‘Come, my dear, and pay your duty to your father,’ said Clarissa, taking her gently by the hand and leading her, unresisting, to Stephen. There she made her bob, standing as straight as a wand, and with only a slight shrinking away she allowed her face to be kissed. Then she was led to the others; their names were clearly stated; they too made their bobs and Brigid walked easily back to her cardhouse, unconscious of their smiling black faces, though she did look straight up into Padeen’s for a moment.
‘Padeen,’ said Clarissa, ‘will you go down that long corridor, now? The first door on your right hand’ - she held up her right hand- ‘is the kitchen, and there you will find Mrs Warren and Nellie. Please give them this note.’
Stephen sat in an elbow-chair away from the light, watching his daughter. Clarissa asked Sarah and Emily about their journey, about Ashgrove and about their clothes. They all sat on a sofa, talking away readily enough as their shyness wore off; but their eyes were fixed on the slight, wholly self-possessed, self-absorbed figure by the hearth.
Mrs Warren and Nellie took some time to appear, since they had to fetch clean aprons and caps to be presented to the Doctor - the master of the house, after all. An ancient whitemuzzled kitchen dog shuffled in after them and the first relief to Stephen’s quite extraordinary pain - extraordinary in that he had never known any of the same nature or the same intensity - came when the old dog sniffed at the back of Brigid’s leg and without stopping her left hand’s delicate motion she reached down with the other to scratch his forehead, while something of pleasure showed through her gravity. Otherwise nothing disturbed her indifference. She saw her tall cardhouse fall, the tottering victim of a draught, with perfect composure; she ate her bread and milk together with Emily and Sarah, unmoved by their presence; and after a good-night ceremony in which Stephen blessed her she went off to bed with neither reluctance nor complaint. He observed with still another kind of pang that if ever their eyes met hers moved directly on, as they might have moved on from those of a marble bust, or of a creature devoid of interest, since it belonged to a different order.
‘Can she speak at all?’ he asked when he and Clarissa were sitting at the dining-table - cold chicken and ham, cheese, and an apple-pie: the servants sent off to bed long since. ‘I am not sure,’ said Clarissa. ‘On occasion I have heard her doing something very like it; but she always stops when I come in.’
‘How much does she understand?’
‘Almost everything, I believe. And unless she is in one of her bad days she is very good and biddable.’
‘Affectionate, would you say?’
‘I like to think so. Indeed, it is probable; but the signs are hard to make out.’

Later:

quote:

Stephen rode towards Ashgrove Cottage, sombre from his long and unsuccessful journey to the North Country, sombre from his stop at Barham, where he had heard of Mrs Williams’ barbarity; but with a sombreness shot through and through with a brilliant gleam. In a small square room upstairs at Barham, overlooking the now almost empty stables, Diana had put a good many of his papers and specimens: a dry little room, in which they might be preserved. On the other side of the passage another room, sometimes called-the nursery, held a number of unused dolls, a rocking-horse, hoops, large coloured balls and the like; and as he sat arranging these papers and sheet after sheet of a hortus siccus collected in the East Indies and sent home from Sydney, he heard Padeen’s voice from across the way.
When Padeen was speaking Irish he stammered very much less - hardly at all if he were not nervous - and now he was discoursing as fluently as could be: ‘That’s the better - bless the good peg - a little higher - oh, the black thief, he missed the stroke - four it is - now for the five - glorious St Kevin, I have the five itself…’
This was usual enough. Padeen alone often talked aloud when he was throwing dice or knuckle-bones or mending a net. Stephen did not so much listen as be aware of the homely, agreeable sound: but abruptly he stiffened. The paper dropped from his hand. It was exactly as though he had heard a faint childish voice cry ‘Twelve!’ or something very like it. Twelve in Irish, of course. With the utmost caution he stood up and set his door on the jar, with a book either side to prevent it moving.
‘For shame, Breed, honey,’ said Padeen, ‘it is a do dhéag you must say. Listen, sweetheart, listen again will you now?
A haon, a do, a tri a ceathir, a cuig, a sé, a seacht, a hocht, a naoi, a deich, a haon déag, a do dhéag, with a noise like yia, yia. Now, a haon, a do…’
The little high voice piped ‘A haon, a do…’ and so right through to ‘a do dheag,’ which she said with just Padeen’s Munster intonation.
‘There’s a golden lamb, God and Mary and Patrick bless you,’ said Padeen kissing her. ‘Now let you throw the hoop on the four, which will make twelve altogether so it will too: since eight and four is twelve for evermore.’
The dinner-bell clashed on Stephen’s intensely listening ear with a most shocking effect - a galvanic effect. It scattered his wits strangely, and he had not fully recovered them before the passage outside creaked under Padeen’s step: he was a big man, as tall though perhaps not as broad-shouldered as Jack Aubrey: and it was clear that he was carrying the child - they talked in a murmur, each into the other’s ear.

Hieronymous Alloy fucked around with this message at 07:21 on Dec 13, 2014

Juaguocio
Jun 5, 2005

Oh, David...

A Confederacy Of Dunces posted:

Abelman’s Dry Goods
Kansas City, Missouri
USA

Mr. I. Abelman, Mongoloid, Esq.:

We have received via post your absurd comments about our trousers, the comments revealing, as they did, your total lack of contact with reality. Were you more aware, you would know or realize by now that the offending trousers were dispatched to you with our full knowledge that they were inadequate so far as length was concerned.

“Why? Why?” you are in your incomprehensible babble, unable to assimilate stimulating concepts of commerce into your retarded and blighted worldview.

The trousers were sent to you (1) as a means of testing your initiative (A clever, wide-awake business concern should be able to make three-quarter length trousers a by-word of masculine fashion. Your advertising and merchandising programs are obviously faulty.) and (2) as a means of testing your ability to meet the standards requisite in a distributor of our quality product. (Our loyal and dependable outlets can vend any trouser bearing the Levy label no matter how abominable their design and construction. You are apparently a faithless people.)

We do not wish to be bothered in the future by such tedious complaints. Please confine your correspondence to orders only. We are a busy and dynamic organization whose mission needless effrontery and harassment can only hinder. If you molest us again, sir, you may feel the sting of the lash across your pitiful shoulders.

Yours in anger,

Gus Levy, Pres.

Falstaff Infection posted:

Yikes. Maybe I should start a "Favorite Coprophagia in Literature" thread? It could have this, 120 Days of Sodom, Hogg (sweet jesus is that book upsetting.)

Don't forget the "Hassan's Rumpus Room" chapter from Naked Lunch.

Juaguocio fucked around with this message at 07:19 on Dec 13, 2014

MadDogMike
Apr 9, 2008

Cute but fanged
I don't know if it's at my "favorite of all time" level or not, but the "terrible secret of the universe" intro of John Dies at the End is one of my favorite story beginnings; it gives you a good feel for exactly how weird/funny the book is gonna be within paragraphs, grabbed me into the book from the start, and has beautiful resonance with the ending with the whole "is a perfect copy of the original the same as the original?" question. Rest of the prologue is great also of course, but it takes a lot to catch me from the first pages.

Alhazred
Feb 16, 2011




From the chapter The Author Talks to Himself from War With The Newts by Karel Čapek:
Just stop it, will you. I can't work miracles. What has to happen will happen! Things run along their inevitable course. And even that's reassuring in its way: that everything that happens has its own necessity and follows certain rules.

"Couldn't the newts be stopped in some way?"

No. There are too many of them. They've got to have room to live in.

"What about if they all died out in some way? Something like some kind of epidemic or degeneration..."

No, that's too cheap and easy. Why should nature have to put right what's been done by man? See?--not even you think they could do anything to save themselves now. You basically think something will come along from somewhere else.

anilEhilated
Feb 17, 2014

But I say fuck the rain.

Grimey Drawer

Alhazred posted:

From the chapter The Author Talks to Himself from War With The Newts by Karel Čapek:
Just stop it, will you. I can't work miracles. What has to happen will happen! Things run along their inevitable course. And even that's reassuring in its way: that everything that happens has its own necessity and follows certain rules.

"Couldn't the newts be stopped in some way?"

No. There are too many of them. They've got to have room to live in.

"What about if they all died out in some way? Something like some kind of epidemic or degeneration..."

No, that's too cheap and easy. Why should nature have to put right what's been done by man? See?--not even you think they could do anything to save themselves now. You basically think something will come along from somewhere else.

That one's beautiful especially when you consider the book is about; it's him finally breaking, realizing the help will not come and trying to come to terms with it in book, in life, having to apply artistic rules to hosed up reality.

Falstaff Infection
Oct 1, 2014
Oh man, I was laughing out loud in class as I read that Confederacy of Dunces passage. "[Y]ou are in your incomprehensible babble, unable to assimilate stimulating concepts of commerce into your retarded and blighted worldview." Is there any funnier book? My money's on no. I guess Catch-22 has its moments, and Skippy Dies is pretty hilarious.

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Helsing
Aug 23, 2003

DON'T POST IN THE ELECTION THREAD UNLESS YOU :love::love::love: JOE BIDEN
Little Man, What Now? by Hans Fallada is one of the best novels I've read in the last few years. It was written by Hans Fallada, a German, and first published in 1932. The plot deals with a young couple who get married following an unplanned pregnancy and their attempts to survive in depression era Germany. Part of the novel's appeal is that it deals with Nazism and the culture of late Wiemar Germany from a contemporary standpoint: the Nazis are part of the story, but the story is not written with retrospective knowledge of the rise of the Third Reich. The book also makes it much easier to understand how the depression tore apart the fabric of society to such a degree that regular people were contemplating supporting the Nazis.

Anyway there's a scene toward the end where the protagonist, Johannes Pinneberg, who is out of work and cannot provide for his wife and baby, is walking down a boulevard in Berlin. Pinneberg has lost his job as a salesman and is becoming increasingly desperate. He stops in front of a shop window to admire some of the goods being displayed only to have a policeman come up and tell him to move along. He looks at his reflection in the mirror and realizes that he looks like a tramp and that the cop only views him as a miscreant and potential trouble maker. He reaches up and tears off his white collar - a symbol of his former status as a salesman - and is forced to accept that he's no longer a part of the middle class. A little later, in the novel's epilogue, we learn that the still unemployed Pinneberg, now living in an outlying suburb of Berlin filled with other unemployed types, is considering joining the Nazis or the Communists so that he will at least have someone to stand up for him.

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