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I currently work for a small firm. It is divvied up into two sections, one of which is me, this girl we'll call Shelly who is one rank above me, and our boss. The other section is everyone else at the firm. I really like our boss, and everyone else at our firm! However, I cannot loving stand Shelly!! Her work is awful – it is full of spelling and grammar mistakes and horribly written overall, and since our firm's output is probably 70% written material, it really harms our reputation. She is too self-proud to accept suggestions for fixing blatant errors. She is constantly callous and abusive. Frankly, she's a spoiled bitch. I don't even like using that term, since I think it has misogynist connotations, but it applies more thoroughly to her than to anyone I've ever met. I also pretty much never get to see everyone else at our firm because they work off-site. Holiday parties and monthly staff meetings, and that's about it. Events like that are always great because I get a chance to connect with those people, all of whom are brilliant and talented – I just avoid Shelly. Currently I'm on a short-term contract, but it seems I am about to be offered a long-term job. However, because I cannot stand working with Shelly, I have begun to look for work elsewhere. I am in the midst of an internal conflict about this. I really like our firm, and especially our boss. We get to do some very interesting work. It's not the firm itself that I want to leave. But sitting three feet away from this person all day every day is, quite literally, making me lose my mind. Moving to the other section isn't really an option because they do much different work that I'm not very well suited for or interested in. It's very difficult to tell what my boss really thinks of Shelly, but I am wary of telling her how I really feel because I am relatively early in my career and don't want to jeopardize a sterling recommendation.
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Dec 20, 2014 15:16
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| # ? May 4, 2024 10:33 |
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Look for other jobs as if you won't be offered a long-term position at the current company, but if/when that happens let them know your concerns. Don't address the quality of Shelly's work - if your boss is worth his salt she's already aware. Be magnanimous in your assessment of the situation - don't read off a list of Shelly's faults. Explain that there's a conflict of personality and "style." Ask what they can do to address your concerns. But I wouldn't take the job if they can't do anything about it, and I feel certain that your boss will still provide you with a good recommendation if that's the case.
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Dec 20, 2014 17:06
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OP, I went through a very similar situation. I used to office with my immediate supervisor, and aside from being a very sloppy worker she was also inconsiderate of our shared space. I liked the job otherwise, so I decided to tough it out a while. Things that helped: 1) If your line of work doesn't prevent it, get some headphones. Music or even nature sound loops can help your mood immensely. Anything talk-based (books, podcasts) not necessarily recommended for this as interruptions could become extra annoying. 2) Whenever you start to get too frustrated, do something that enforces calm sensory awareness. Eat a hard candy, go outside for a few minutes, or even just take a Google Image break and look at something that makes you happy. 3) Remember that however invested you are in your employer's success, you can only do your personal best. Don't take the weight of Shelly's mistakes on your shoulders; that belongs to her, and to the firm for keeping her on. 4) If you feel like you could work there forever if only Shelly wasn't a factor and you still have some tolerance left to draw on, try setting yourself a hard deadline for "she's gone or I'm job hunting". It provides a definite end to an interminable situation, which can help extend your patience. If the deadline arrives and nothing has changed, you know you did everything you could and it's time to move on.
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Dec 20, 2014 17:06
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Do not do your manager's job for them. Every employee has limitations and it's none of your business to assess a colleague's fitness for the tasks they've been assigned. You will start feeling some relief when you start worrying about your job and how that reflects on your dept or firm and let your superiors do their job. They may do it wrong but that's not something you can change.
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Dec 20, 2014 18:00
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KOTEX GOD OF BLOOD posted:Her work is awful – it is full of spelling and grammar mistakes and horribly written overall, and since our firm's output is probably 70% written material, it really harms our reputation. She is too self-proud to accept suggestions for fixing blatant errors. She is constantly callous and abusive. Frankly, she's a spoiled bitch. I don't even like using that term, since I think it has misogynist connotations, but it applies more thoroughly to her than to anyone I've ever met.
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Dec 20, 2014 22:23
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| # ? May 4, 2024 10:33 |
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KOTEX GOD OF BLOOD posted:Currently I'm on a short-term contract, but it seems I am about to be offered a long-term job. However, because I cannot stand working with Shelly, I have begun to look for work elsewhere. I am in the midst of an internal conflict about this. I really like our firm, and especially our boss. We get to do some very interesting work. It's not the firm itself that I want to leave. But sitting three feet away from this person all day every day is, quite literally, making me lose my mind. Moving to the other section isn't really an option because they do much different work that I'm not very well suited for or interested in. It's very difficult to tell what my boss really thinks of Shelly, but I am wary of telling her how I really feel because I am relatively early in my career and don't want to jeopardize a sterling recommendation. I often deal with a lot of lovely situations. As you are on a short term contract looking for another job is the path of least resistance. When you leave tell the manager why you've left. lovely senior staff or management often leads to high staff turn over. If you were a long term staff member my advice would be very different and specific.
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Dec 20, 2014 23:07
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