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I opened up my computer and found absolutely no traces of blood, black bile, yellow bile, or phlegm. What the gently caress is this forum supposed to be about??
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Jan 4, 2015 14:49
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try to uh, haha, try to delete system32, op. hha..
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Jan 4, 2015 14:54
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your threads are better when you don't try so hard, op
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Jan 4, 2015 16:49
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computers are composed of the four humours: keys, wires, blinky lights, FOSS software
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Jan 4, 2015 19:01
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Computer humour in the pos revolves around misspelling of famous IT celeb names, posting about your catte, and Marissa Mayer's pussy (vagina).
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Jan 4, 2015 19:03
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maniacdevnull posted:your threads are better when you don't post, op
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Jan 4, 2015 19:17
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black man 3 posted:Computer humour in the pos revolves around misspelling of famous IT celeb names, posting about your catte, and Marissa Mayer's pussy (vagina). this thread definitely makes me check my yospos priviledge. sorta rattles my cage, you know?
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Jan 4, 2015 19:38
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I can't believe I'm not currently employed
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Jan 5, 2015 04:41
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the funny thing about computers op, is realizing how funny they are not
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Jan 5, 2015 04:51
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LP0 ON FIRE posted:the funny thing about computers op, is realizing how funny they are not Now that you mention it, I can't think of a single good comedian that was also a computer.
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Jan 5, 2015 04:52
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how do you feel about red pandas ??
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Jan 5, 2015 06:17
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keyvin posted:Now that you mention it, I can't think of a single good comedian that was also a computer. where's that site of that really bad joke generator that supposedly learns but still makes really weird awful jokes that don't make sense?
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Jan 5, 2015 06:30
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heck, at this point i'd settle for some regular humor even if it's not computer related
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Jan 5, 2015 06:44
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LP0 ON FIRE posted:where's that site of that really bad joke generator that supposedly learns but still makes really weird awful jokes that don't make sense? http://forums.somethingawful.com/forumdisplay.php?forumid=219
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Jan 5, 2015 06:54
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i've become... self aware
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Jan 5, 2015 07:03
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i dunno whats wrong with your computer, there should be plenty of humors in it
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Jan 5, 2015 07:54
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it's important to use a fan on your heat sink to remove excess phlogiston
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Jan 5, 2015 09:00
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kraftwerk singles posted:I opened up my computer and found absolutely no traces of blood, black bile, yellow bile, or phlegm. What the gently caress is this forum supposed to be about?? i get it
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Jan 5, 2015 09:04
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duckfarts posted:i dunno whats wrong with your computer, there should be plenty of humors in it Is that liquid cooling, or evidence from Hans Reiser's house?
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Jan 5, 2015 18:05
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streetlamp posted:how do you feel about red pandas ?? less humourous than the vitreous operating system
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Jan 5, 2015 18:07
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Q: How do you tell an introverted computer scientist from an extroverted computer scientist? A: An extroverted computer scientist looks at your shoes when he talks to you.
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Jan 5, 2015 19:50
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Q: Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas? A: Because Oct 31 == Dec 25!
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Jan 5, 2015 19:51
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"Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” very long pause…. “Java.”
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Jan 5, 2015 19:51
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A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed. The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain. They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane. They pulled into the escape lane, and came safely to a halt. The physicist said "We need to model the friction in the brake pads and the resultant temperature rise, see if we can work out why they failed". The engineer said "I think I've got a few spanners in the back. I'll take a look and see if I can work out what's wrong". The programmer said "Why don't we get going again and see if it's reproducible?"
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Jan 5, 2015 19:53
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If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program. The rest of them will write Perl programs.
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Jan 5, 2015 19:54
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Q: "Whats the object-oriented way to become wealthy?" A: Inheritance
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Jan 5, 2015 19:55
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Programming is like sex: One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
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Jan 5, 2015 19:56
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There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary and those who have regular sex.
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Jan 5, 2015 20:00
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Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Versace tie, gets out and asks the Shepherd: Man: “If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?” The shepherd looks at the young man, and then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies: Shepherd: “Okay.” The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Webster, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with logarithms and pivot tables, then prints out a 150 page report on his high-tech mini-printer. He turns to the shepherd and says, Man: “You have exactly 1,586 sheep here.” The shepherd cheers, Shepherd: “That’s correct, you can have your sheep.” The young man makes his pick and puts it in the back of his Porsche. The shepherd looks at him and asks, Shepherd: “If I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me?” The young man answers; Man: “Yes, why not?” Shepherd: "You are an IT consultant." Man: “How did you know?” Shepherd: “Very simple. First, you came here without being called. Second, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew, and third, you don’t understand anything about my business…Now can I have my DOG back?"
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Jan 5, 2015 20:01
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Santas Ainol Elf posted:If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program. 
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Jan 5, 2015 20:11
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An optimist person will say that the glass is half-full. A pessimist person will say that the glass is half-empty. A programmer will say that the glass is twice as large as necessary.
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Jan 5, 2015 20:23
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Windows is... a 64 bit rewrite of a 32 bit extension to a 16 bit api to an 8 bit kernel for a 4 bit microprocessor by a 2 bit company that can't stand 1 bit of competition.
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Jan 5, 2015 20:30
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Santas Ainol Elf posted:Q: "Whats the object-oriented way to become wealthy?" Lmao.
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Jan 5, 2015 20:43
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keyvin posted:Is that liquid cooling, or evidence from Hans Reiser's house? Yes!
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Jan 6, 2015 04:41
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Jan 6, 2015 04:50
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Santas Ainol Elf posted:A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed. The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain. They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane. They pulled into the escape lane, and came safely to a halt. about three months before i started, four people from the IT department at my first job crashed their car into the side of a mountain and died
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Jan 6, 2015 04:55
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Cold on a Cob posted:about three months before i started, four people from the IT department at my first job crashed their car into the side of a mountain and died issue closed
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Jan 7, 2015 14:08
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