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 "Look at how pretty and popular I am. Tee hee." Bitch you a six and you dress up for the Ren Fair.
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Feb 10, 2015 01:31
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Cuckoo posted:I was an idiot v This but looking for female art nerds. It's either attractive women with the personality of a loaf of bread or fat shut-ins telling me about their fan fiction (this actually happened last week).
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Feb 10, 2015 23:26
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Violet_Sky posted:Let me tell you about my wincest fan-fiction. Are you a fat? My attention span hinges on this.
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Feb 10, 2015 23:53
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Violet_Sky posted:Unfortunately, he was neither hot or rich. He also said that I "looked like an angel" which must mean I look like a freak of nature. Thanks guy. Pic to confirm
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Feb 11, 2015 03:54
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C.P.A.N. posted:Are you a fat? Just answer the question.
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Feb 11, 2015 04:29
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Sheep-Goats posted:Without a picture you don't know that. I'm 95% sure I can guess what she looks like just from that profile text.
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Feb 15, 2015 03:58
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Ex-Priest Tobin posted:has anyone ever attempted to make a dating site for only goons? i think it would be an interesting social experiment I remember around 2007-8 there was a site that showed you goons and /b/-tards in your general area.
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Feb 15, 2015 12:25
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Setzer Gabbiani posted:I wanna say maybe 30% of the girls you'd actually wanna date label themselves as bi so they can get the tumblr-approved "keep disgusting cishets from viewing my profile" option, because gender binary-rejecting guy = sensitive a-grade male specimen, while it also lets them keep their heterosexuality intact, so "filter bi" is a very real thing with dudes Thanks for reminding me why my filter has been set to straight girls only since I signed up.
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Feb 15, 2015 12:33
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If your "Message me if" and "Self summary" sections are the same length, chances are you aren't attractive enough to be setting those kinds of terms.
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Feb 16, 2015 10:53
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toggle posted:im not reading all those words about you, girl. let me just see some pics of you at a colour run, riding an elephant in thailand or holding up the tower of piza so i can send a witty and clever message for you to ignore This toggle posted:for someone with purple hair you sure are picky about who you let inside you drat Also, this
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Feb 18, 2015 11:20
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I met a girl off Tinder who was 28 and had never even kissed a boy before. She didn't tell me this until I said I wasn't interested in dating her anymore. Come to find out the reason was crippling depression. It was a real shame. She was cute, cursed like a sailor and could hold her own at the bar. My point is, don't be someone's first anything. Nothing good ever comes of it.
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Feb 20, 2015 03:09
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"I like to travel" = "Hope you have lots of money to spend on me"
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Feb 20, 2015 20:47
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C.P.A.N. hates it when people refer to themselves in the third person. Does anyone else's eyes just glaze over at these wall of text profiles? I end up not reading any of the content in this thread because I default to my okc behavior of just skipping over these kinds of profiles.
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Feb 23, 2015 23:34
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"Soliciting a Prostitute for Dummies"
chickie nugs for brekkie fucked around with this message at 10:39 on Feb 26, 2015 |
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Feb 26, 2015 10:21
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These meltdowns make life worth living.naem posted:As a huge dong haver it's more like an expected bonus when you take you pants off and maybe she'll stick around longer and then stalk you for months after a break up Christ I thought I was the only one. There are girls who seriously would not go away after a dicking.
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Mar 14, 2015 23:44
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Admits to waxing her beard and liking sex. I'm gonna guess there's some wild colored hair too. And an extra 75 lbs.
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Mar 18, 2015 09:22
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Anton Chigurh posted:Actually she is pretty hot for being in her mid-40's. Oh you left out the mid-40s part. Wet it up.
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Mar 18, 2015 11:07
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toggle posted:only your penor You missed the OTP part. Literally the worst sex act.
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Mar 18, 2015 11:11
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I desire to be strictly monogamous and don't want kids. I am the 1%. AMA
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Mar 27, 2015 07:58
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In my old city there was a troupe of belly dancers. We called them "The Muffintops" Fun fact: apparently you tip belly dancers just like strippers
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Mar 27, 2015 17:25
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She's not attractive enough to be making those kinds of demands
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Apr 1, 2015 13:49
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Breetai posted:Note to self: always look for a body shot. Because apparently the 'athletic body type' of a 'gym junkie' shares real estate on a venn diagram with 'ewok'. This. Also the fattest pic is always the most recent, no matter where it falls in the line up.
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Apr 6, 2015 06:11
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Apr 7, 2015 20:15
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Chalets the Baka posted:Have over 150 messages in my inbox and nearly all of these men are either below 6'2" or don't list their height. I don't even know why I bother. I'm over 6 foot & 8 inches. Those are two separate measurements
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Apr 11, 2015 05:49
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In my experience the short girls take dick a lot easier than the tall ones. I've always wondered why.
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Apr 18, 2015 02:52
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metasynthetic posted:masturbate at home instead of on the merry go round 
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Apr 18, 2015 08:33
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I once had a girl blow off a date 2 hours before then decided she wanted the free meal after all. She spent the entire time being rude to the waiter and I but still had the nerve to be offended when I asked for separate checks. She was so sure of the free food she had to go out to her car to get her purse. It was great.
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Apr 26, 2015 22:49
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toggle posted:Why didn't she just drive away? Wow I never thought of that. So she was stupid in addition to being rude and batshit crazy. Lufiron posted:plus he couldve just gave the place all the info he had on her But also this.
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Apr 27, 2015 19:10
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captainOrbital posted:Hot girls with short hair are hot.
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Apr 28, 2015 18:00
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We used to play a game at work with my OKC profile where we would guess the attractiveness of women who sent messages based on screen names. The line was set at 4.5/10. I always bet the under. I was always right 
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Apr 29, 2015 23:28
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Sanctum posted:Man who was that one goon that said he kept getting match %'s with nothing but hideously obese fatties. Do you guys answer questions to try to get the worst profiles, because I'm getting stuff like this: There's your answer. Big metropolitan cities are bound to have someone more attractive but just as broken as you are. Rules of dating: 1. Be attractive 2. Don't be unattractive
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May 1, 2015 05:38
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Lol yeah if I had to burn $200 on an STD test after every partner I'd be perpetually broke.
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May 18, 2015 11:44
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Lol at not wanting peter tracks across my medical record
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May 18, 2015 11:57
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Sheep-Goats posted:The interesting-ness of the profile is directly proportional to body fat percentage, not race. :wisdom:
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Jun 8, 2015 17:04
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