- Chef Shimi
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If you put a copy of The Bible on top of The Satanic Bible then order is restored, if you do it the other way than Satan gives you a new BMX bike with pegs so he can ride too.
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Mar 30, 2015 23:59
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 4, 2024 09:55
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- cuntman.net
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one time i tried burning a copy of the satanic bible. i thought i was doing a good deed but what i didnt realize was that fire only makes the devil stronger
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Mar 31, 2015 00:04
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- Chef Shimi
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I put Richard Dawkins book next to The Bible on my shelf and The Bible grew little wings and flew away...take that Christians.
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Mar 31, 2015 00:05
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- Chef Shimi
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I put Satan's Book under my pillow so I can have all sorts of badass dreams.
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Mar 31, 2015 00:11
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- treasure bear
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I put Satan's Book under my pillow so I can have all sorts of badass dreams.
i used to put encyclopaedias under my pillow and now i have a flat head
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Mar 31, 2015 00:13
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- Chef Shimi
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The world's most secure gun safe is a copy of Ulysses with a gun shaped hole inside it. Even if somebody reads it they won't be able to tell the gun is there.
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Mar 31, 2015 00:17
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- WetNightmare
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by sebmojo
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one time when i was sworn into court i acted like the Bible severely burned my right and pulled my right hand away, shaking it going "oo OO ooo" and everybody laughed so hard i winned the case + winned the countersuit.
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Mar 31, 2015 00:18
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- HUSKY DILF
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aggressively chill
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dont read anything ever
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Mar 31, 2015 00:19
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- Yobgoblin
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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i put a textbook under my pillow and woke up with a dick drawn on my face
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Mar 31, 2015 00:27
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- dogcrash truther
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chef shimi posts a lot like i am he, which is a compliment
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Mar 31, 2015 00:32
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- beer pal
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i was gonna buy moby dick, but the guy at the counter was like... 'that book is pretty heavy man' and gave me animal farm and a big thing of protein powder
https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png
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Mar 31, 2015 00:40
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- cuntman.net
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The world's most secure gun safe is a copy of Ulysses with a gun shaped hole inside it. Even if somebody reads it they won't be able to tell the gun is there.
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Mar 31, 2015 01:01
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- bwatts
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chef shimi posts a lot like i am he, which is a compliment
theyre the same person, thats why. check the ips if you can as a mod
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Mar 31, 2015 01:13
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- Piso Mojado
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The world's most secure gun safe is a copy of Ulysses with a gun shaped hole inside it. Even if somebody reads it they won't be able to tell the gun is there.
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Mar 31, 2015 01:15
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- alnilam
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I put Richard Dawkins book next to The Bible on my shelf and The Bible grew little wings and flew away...take that Christians.
when you think about it the bible has "evolved" quite a lot over time, for example it evolved red text so you know what parts to read in an angry voice, and it evolved super thin pages to avoid pirates making the black spot out of it
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Mar 31, 2015 03:11
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- WetNightmare
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by sebmojo
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i was gonna buy moby dick, but the guy at the counter was like... 'that book is pretty heavy man' and gave me animal farm and a big thing of protein powder
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Mar 31, 2015 03:16
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- dogcrash truther
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when you think about it the bible has "evolved" quite a lot over time, for example it evolved red text so you know what parts to read in an angry voice, and it evolved super thin pages to avoid pirates making the black spot out of it
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Mar 31, 2015 03:27
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- dogcrash truther
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you know board books, like babies have, well my innovation is to have board books, but they're for adults
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Mar 31, 2015 03:28
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- Finger Prince
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The world's most secure gun safe is a copy of Ulysses with a gun shaped hole inside it. Even if somebody reads it they won't be able to tell the gun is there.
When they get to the page where the gun starts, they pull out the gun, shoot themselves in the head, put the gun back and the book on the shelf and then go outside and die.
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Mar 31, 2015 03:32
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- i am he
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theyre the same person, thats why. check the ips if you can as a mod
Nope...
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Mar 31, 2015 04:16
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- fuck. marry. t-rex
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What do you know about I am he?
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Mar 31, 2015 04:27
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- the unabonger
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all books are spell books if you chant the right way.
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Mar 31, 2015 04:35
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- fuck. marry. t-rex
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all books are spell books if you chant the right way.
Yeah you chant letter by letter to spell the words
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Mar 31, 2015 04:52
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- WetNightmare
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by sebmojo
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whats messed up about books is that there are worms, and these worms live in these books, eating the glue that binds the pages, ok, and Kindle and all that e-book mess is like a big old bulldozer to their environment, it messes up their environment, killing them
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Mar 31, 2015 05:10
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- bwatts
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the "old book smell" people go on about so much is actually spores released by old books to make people love them and want to read them
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Mar 31, 2015 06:28
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- bwatts
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it might be called the "spine" of the book, but that's not quite accurate - in fact, books don't have any bones at all.
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Mar 31, 2015 06:29
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 4, 2024 09:55
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- bwatts
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the longest word ever used in a book is 'smiles'. why? well, because it goes on for miles and has an extra s on the beginning.
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Mar 31, 2015 06:34
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Mar 30, 2015 23:59
