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I feel like, I will be able to do so many cool things if I avoid having kids. But most people have them. And probably wanted to have them before they had them. Why have 'em? Seriously.
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Jun 22, 2015 04:35
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| # ? May 4, 2024 23:39 |
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Biological imperative? idk. If you don't want kids, then don't have kids.
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Jun 22, 2015 04:38
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unlimited unpaid labor supply, replenishes the ranks of the proletariat, ability to live on vicariously against their desires as you force them to succeed where you failed, gives you something to talk to neighbors and relatives about, must not be outbred by lesser races, etc
Rodatose fucked around with this message at 04:41 on Jun 22, 2015 |
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Jun 22, 2015 04:39
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Breed 'em, sell 'em. Read My Lips. Free Mo-Nay.
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Jun 22, 2015 04:48
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Rodatose posted:ability to live on vicariously against their desires as you force them to succeed where you failed Mostly this. You might be a talentless, undriven hack, but your kids can definitely do that thing you wanted to do if only they put in the time...
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Jun 22, 2015 04:50
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feels good man
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Jun 22, 2015 04:51
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Tax breaks. Never do dishes/take garbage out/mow lawn/etc. again (once they're 3 years and older). Fall-back retirement plan. Plus the added bonus of seeing their hot girlfriends or boyfriends when they're older so you can reminisce about when you could get it up without viagra or your vag would lubricate itself when you were all hot and bothered, feel really badly about yourself, and then end it all by throwing yourself off a cliff or drinking a bottle of drano.
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Jun 22, 2015 04:55
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WhiskeyJuvenile posted:feels good man
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Jun 22, 2015 04:55
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They're skilled munitions workers. They're essential. Essential girls! Their fingers polish the inside of shell metal casings. How else am I to polish the inside of a 45 millimeter shell casing?
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Jun 22, 2015 04:56
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Spare organs with a higher chance of compatibility. I'm not allowed to hit my wife but they haven't banned spanking kids, that's gotta be pretty cathartic. Spare blood. I figure a kid might have hair like mine so I can get a pretty natural wig made, I've kinda gone bald. My wife watches a lot of Criminal Minds and Law & Order: Special Rapey Edition and she says that kids make good lure. They can ask for money for a birthday/xmas present from the grandparents and then you can "hold it for them until they're older". Make sure not to get bonds. I figure if I have a kid I'll know if my wife is cheating on me or not. Yeah it may take a few years to see if it looks like me but then I'll know.
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Jun 22, 2015 06:54
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Rodatose posted:unlimited unpaid labor supply, replenishes the ranks of the proletariat, ability to live on vicariously against their desires as you force them to succeed where you failed, gives you something to talk to neighbors and relatives about, must not be outbred by lesser races, etc See, the problem here is that none of this is enacted. You actually have to be hardline to do this, especially making them work. I see no benefit to children unless you keep them out of school so that a) they can work and b) they aren't brainwashed/made numb. Possibly the only legit reason, if you are white, is that every other race is pumping them out faster. Totally unironic fyi. I see no benefit to having kids personally. A better question would be: why had kids if you can't (and have to resort to IVF) or if there is a high chance of creating autistic kids or kids with some other issue? Genetics is our future, both for screening and removing the need for child-rearing altogether.
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Jun 22, 2015 07:02
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Because I've found kids are pretty awesome in general, even if they have their lovely moments. I have an 8 month old at home, and she is both the most amazing thing and sometimes the most frustrating thing ever. Watching her learn to crawl, laugh for the first time, etc. is really quite astounding. Yes, 7 billion people have done it before her, but it doesn't make it any less cool to see and be a part of. When I get home from work at night, and she sees me for the first time all day and gives me a big smile, I can't help but feel pretty great. So on the one hand, I enjoy having a child for what it is, but they also act like an amplifier. Like when poo poo is fun and you have kids, it's even more fun (mind you the reverse is true for when things are bad as well). I dunno, I've always wanted kids, as did my wife. We had one, we'll probably have another, and I'm loving being a dad. Totally understand the people who don't want kids and would never dream of telling people "Oh you'll change your mind / regret it" because that's drat obnoxious.
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Jun 22, 2015 07:02
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Yeah, I'm not going to tell people they shouldn't have kids (unless, you know, the previous genetic disorder thing is relevant).
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Jun 22, 2015 07:04
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There's always the chance that they'll be cute and adorable and turn into a celebrity of some kind. Who better to manage their vast new-found wealth because they legally can't? That's right, you the parent!! They'll likely turn into a used up drug addict, but if you invest wisely you can set yourself up to live very comfortably.
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Jun 22, 2015 07:13
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owning child gives your life shape and meaning with an average purpose-value equal to owning 3.7 dogs or 11 cats.
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Jun 22, 2015 07:24
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Donor organs
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Jun 22, 2015 07:25
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EB Nulshit posted:Why have 'em? Seriously. People will say poo poo like "biological imperative" but the dramatic shrinkage in family size in just a few generations shows that to be more of gentle suggestion than an imperative. The transformation of children from asset to liability is a social problem we will eventually have to address. Doesn't have to be soon. Sustainability is important and until we find better ways of generating energy declining populations isn't a bad thing. But eventually we will want birth rate back up to at least rate of replacement. Our anti-child social/economic organization severely impairs our ability to understand history and some other cultures because we can't really grasp the concept of children being economically beneficial to their parents without reducing it into a cartoonishly evil caricature of child exploitation. And when people talk about the subject they do it the wrong way round imo. they focus on thing like ending child labor that reduce the payout from children when the real issue is the stratospheric rise of lost opportunity cost from having them. You said it yourself: EB Nulshit posted:I feel like, I will be able to do so many cool things if I avoid having kids. Those words are a new sentiment. If you were a typical pre-industrial person you would work in cottage industry in a job you inherited from your parents. You would probably live your entire life within a few miles of your birth place. Getting pregnant or having your spouse become pregnant would not cause either of you to lose your jobs because you are self employed. Nor would it interfere with your education as that came from your parents and they'll continue offering advice well into adulthood. Nor would it limit your travel opportunities because you don't travel. All this cool stuff you can do if you pass on kids is a new thing.
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Jun 22, 2015 07:27
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"I want someone who will unconditionally love me forever, no matter how hosed up things get." -Almost everyone
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Jun 22, 2015 12:49
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You shouldn't have kids.
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Jun 22, 2015 13:30
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Babies are completely useless. No one has ever been able to tell me something significant that a baby has done.
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Jun 22, 2015 13:32
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baw posted:Babies are completely useless. No one has ever been able to tell me something significant that a baby has done. The bottom line is, they are takers.
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Jun 22, 2015 14:18
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Part of the human experience. Also so you don't die alone.
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Jun 22, 2015 14:26
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cowofwar posted:Part of the human experience. Also so you don't die alone.
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Jun 22, 2015 14:32
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Also assumes that you don't die suddenly/before your kids/that your kids still like you/that the trauma of your deathbed does not psychologically isolate you utterly from those around you and entomb you in a prison of your own suffering before you die.
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Jun 22, 2015 14:35
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Literally The Worst posted:Donor organs It's always advisable to have a parts kid in case you have to fix your other kid.
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Jun 22, 2015 14:36
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snorch posted:It's always advisable to have a parts kid in case you have to fix your other kid. This is a thing, unfortunately: http://www.nytimes.com/1991/06/04/health/more-babies-being-born-to-be-donors-of-tissue.html I have serious problems with this practice as the donor children are not capable of informed consent IMO.
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Jun 22, 2015 14:39
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cowofwar posted:Part of the human experience. Also so you don't die alone. Much easier and cheaper to just do something that means a lot to someone or a group of people, especially since you can't guarantee that your children will like you or vice versa (I'm sure this has never actually happened, but just throwing it out there). Edit: Learning that I was born to be a tissue "donor" would really strain my relationship with my parents. drat that's cold.
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Jun 22, 2015 14:49
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I can absolutely understand the appeal of being a parent, I just think I have far too many issues to have one myself. What actually frustrates me are the people who get genuinely angry with me for not wanting them. I've been called selfish, ignorant (that one is particularly odd to me), inconsiderate, and foolish for stating my intention to be child free.
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Jun 22, 2015 14:51
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I like the idea of raising and helping someone through life, and I think existing children should be given encouragement and opportunity, but calling someone selfish or inconsiderate because they don't want to coerce a conscious being to exist (and someday to suffer and die) without its informed consent is 
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Jun 22, 2015 14:56
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I miscegenated in order to annoy white supremacists.
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Jun 22, 2015 14:59
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VideoTapir posted:I miscegenated in order to annoy white supremacists. A Good Reason to have a child.
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Jun 22, 2015 15:03
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Only way to make baby oil.
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Jun 22, 2015 15:05
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Pretty lovely to have kids considering how hosed up the planet will be in 100 years. Not a very nice thing to do to them.
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Jun 22, 2015 15:08
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Biological imperative, pleasant brain chemicals when you see your kids (apparently), all your ancestors did it and it's good to pay it forward, and it's the only way to shut out the constant background terror of certain death by making sure a part of you lives on after you're rotted away and forgotten forever
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Jun 22, 2015 15:15
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Because basic biology says so.
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Jun 22, 2015 15:24
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ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:Because basic biology says so. Fortunately we have a frontal lobe so we can suppress those animal instincts.
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Jun 22, 2015 15:31
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EB Nulshit posted:I feel like, I will be able to do so many cool things if I avoid having kids. But most people have them. And probably wanted to have them before they had them. Because if you play your cards right that means that you won't be dying alone, poor and without any to call for aid.
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Jun 22, 2015 15:34
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Xoidanor posted:Because if you play your cards right that means that you won't be dying alone, poor and without any to call for aid. Oldest MLM scam in the book.
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Jun 22, 2015 15:42
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Because it is our sacred duty to spread the melanoma that is man across every body of this cosmos. A pyre of free energy to hasten the heat death, and universal peace.
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Jun 22, 2015 15:45
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beep boop I am a goon I do not know why humans reproduce
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Jun 22, 2015 15:53
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