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Kramer: "So Jerry, the new towel boy at the health club, he's a bugcatcher." Jerry: "A bugcatcher? What, like a dog catcher with a smaller net?" Kramer: "No, a bug catcher, Jerry. He gets off on the idea of getting HIV." Jerry : "Get outta here, there's no such thing." Kramer: "Oh, sure there is Jerry. These people, they just love the thought of somebody pozzing their neg holes." George: *snort* "Can you believe this Jerry? These people have perfectly good neg holes and they want to just throw them away." Jerry: "The nerve!" George: "I wish I had a neg hole." Kramer: "Jerry, you got to help me get Newman to sodomize the towel boy. He has a poz pole, you know." Jerry: "Newman has a poz pole?" Kramer: "A poz pole for a neg hole." Jerry: "Newman." *** Kramer [kramering through the door] "It's full blown AIDS, Jerry!"
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Nov 29, 2015 02:54
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learning that quoting a post undoes the filter has really changed my life. it's like putting on the glasses from They Live.
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Feb 14, 2016 23:49
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Sham bam bamina! posted:Yeah, when a horde of imbeciles bandwagons it into the ground. Then this thread must be the death of humor
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Apr 19, 2016 01:32
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Kay Kessler posted:It even sounds like the premise to a Seinfeld episode. "Jerry, how can you have never seen a shrimp before?" Keeping kosher, duh 
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May 19, 2016 00:37
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poz my neg search history
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Oct 13, 2016 01:59
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Every time somebody talks about one world government, I think of how easily goons freak about about inconsequential regional differences like word pronunciation and how to pump gas, then I just laugh and laugh and laugh and lau
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Oct 20, 2016 23:55
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Solice Kirsk posted:One of the greatest things I've ever seen was my buddy sucking the last bit of meat off a beef rib and then popping a bottle cap with the bone. really appreciate it if you stop staring when I'm sucking meat off of bones, kinda awkward imo
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Dec 24, 2016 22:09
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Just slide it straight into my mouth. No, don't call an ambulance, I have done everything I need to do on this earth. You can let me go now.
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May 12, 2017 13:17
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Christ, every goon stereotype is doing better than I am 
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May 29, 2017 02:22
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Cindy Shitbird posted:imagine four goons on the edge of a well It's piss all the way down
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May 31, 2017 04:05
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chernobyl kinsman posted:give it to me. give me forums cancer Poz my neg account
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Jun 19, 2017 01:45
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Misread as Obama, still worked 
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Jul 5, 2017 04:18
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Nope, pretty sure if you don't like and know about the same things that I like and know about then you are either a liar or a broken excuse of a human being. Maybe both.
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Jul 19, 2017 00:55
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Oh good, is this the thread where we tell people how enlightened we are because we've transcended the arbitrary bounds of nationalism? Would have found this thread sooner but the title was off. *in a very freshman_poli_sci_major voice* how can you act like you care when people in your country die when people in other countries are also dying? Hypocritical eurocentric pig 
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Aug 22, 2017 15:12
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In any other year I would scoff, but if 2017 has taught me anything...
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Sep 22, 2017 17:06
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Anyways, isn't sand actually the oldest rock? You do understand that grains of sand don't grow up to be mountains, right goons?
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Oct 27, 2017 01:44
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Sandstone is just old rock on viagra. Contact a doctor if your sandstone remains erect for more than 6 millenia.
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Oct 27, 2017 01:48
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lemon-lyme disease posted:
"Things your public defender wishes you didn't say on the stand."
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Oct 27, 2017 04:37
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I knew those two courses in comp sci weren't a waste of credits! I got like half of those jokes 
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Oct 28, 2017 15:10
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It's great that everybody's first reaction to "how many people can fit into a phone booth" is mass mutilation and not "technically, an airplane hangar with a telephone is a phone booth"
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Nov 13, 2017 06:07
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e:wrong thread
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Nov 30, 2017 07:03
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Naming my kid Thaitan thanks to this thread.
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Dec 1, 2017 02:42
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gently caress, now I need another kid that I can name Hailgay Satan
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Dec 1, 2017 03:38
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Imagine four children painting on the edge of a cliff. You throw the fourth child off the cliff. That child was Hitler. Time works the same way.
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Jan 2, 2018 04:04
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It's remixed so often because people decided that a repeated setup leading into references to other things you may have heard of is entertainment. It is the new millennium's "how many X does it take to screw in a light bulb" joke and just about as amusing.
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Jan 23, 2018 22:00
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Has SA had a nice long slow meltdown since BlueStory? Nothing kills a Friday night better than reading through 4,000 posts of goons banding together to scream at one incredibly oblivious person.
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Mar 9, 2018 15:33
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Lady and the tramping a tapeworm out of your partner's b-hole
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Mar 11, 2018 22:36
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Obvious solution would be to put a corkscrew into the slide as it rises upward to counter the g-force. Please fund my kickstarter for new wet and wild theme park god bless
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Mar 26, 2018 00:56
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When I was a child I wrote a story about a waterslide that included a segment where you actually had to swim up a u-bend mid-way through the ride. Thinking back, that was a really loving stupid thing to write.
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Mar 26, 2018 03:40
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Oh, cutnpaste.
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Mar 31, 2018 18:28
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The morally inept knot is an inferior knot fit only for scurvy dog seamen 
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Apr 1, 2018 00:45
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With a four-in-hand knot they probably both fit in, but good luck squeezing them in with a full windsor.
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Apr 21, 2018 22:44
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Steamed Hams Except It's Jon Arbuckle Chugging Dog Cum
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Apr 22, 2018 22:58
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Buddy, when Jim Davis tells you to drink dog cum you drink the loving dog cum
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Apr 23, 2018 01:48
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It's not like dog cum is any grosser than human cum
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Apr 23, 2018 03:35
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It was my doctoral thesis!
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Apr 23, 2018 03:48
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Absurd Alhazred posted:It came from the r/relationships thread: Experienced something completely awful you say? 
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Apr 29, 2018 22:47
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syscall girl posted:sorry m8, but they were already dead and quite crunchy Well if we took the bones out it wouldn't be crunchy, would it?
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Jun 17, 2018 03:08
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Which eventually devolved:quote:Well, that does it. Fire marshal came down and shouted, actually shouted at me because my awful, horrible desire to have outlets actually be conveniently placed, (that is, if I want to plug something in, I can do it no matter where in the house I'm standing, sitting, or working on a ladder) was "immediately endangering the lives" of my family - his words. So, he ordered us to do some rewiring. I slipped 2000mg of Aminorex into Old Wifey's breakfast-for-dinner, so she's out in the secondary TV room maniacally delving into the insulation and tearing out big bundles of wiring. I'm just taking a beer break and updating the thread, which I guess I shouldn't be doing, since current's still flowing in the wiring she's not supposed to remove. In some rooms, though, we're just gonna stuff in another layer of insulation and put the 'correct' wiring in over the top quote:Failed ANOTHER inspection - Different fire marshal - SAME wiring. Call me paranoid but I can't imagine that two completely different fire marshals, from competely different government bodies (the city and the state police), would just randomly come to the same conclusion about such a clever wiring setup. I pointed out that Id already purchased and installed over 180 outlets over the course of the project, so I probably knew what I was doing by now. And anyway, I could have every outlet-capable thing I own plugged in, on, and running, and it wouldn't even take up a quarter of them. Meanwhile, the Ol Wifenheimer, fuzzed out of her mind on black bombers and kratom, skittered by like a trembling woodcutter ant with several dozen sheets of plywood hoisted above her quietly jabbering head. I told the Marshal how much I wanted them but he shook his head sadly and said, "Grover, you need to choose a few outlets, and you need to take the rest away. You can't have them all, it's dangerous, you could burn your house down and you don't want to die in a terrible fire? Do you? That's why we need you to take the wires out, Grover, so you don't hurt yourself and your family." I swore up and down that I'd do the work, and not just try to fool him with a new fake-wiring setup like I did the other guy, but now that he's walked out the door - I kind of feel like just leaving it, and then start dodging inspections until after I get licensed up myself vv
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Jun 17, 2018 18:30
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Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:The wheel of threads turns, and posts come and pass, leaving memories that become legend. Legend fades to myth, and even myth is long forgotten when the thread that gave it birth is resurrected once again in PYF quotes discussion. There are no shitposts in the wheel of threads, but it was a shitpost.
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Jun 17, 2018 21:21
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