Skeesix posted:

Someone post the thing about Rush Limbaugh being vaccinated after minions with gold chains drag him before Obama, after which Obama decides it's time for him and a group of terrorist leaders to have a conversation. I can't find it on Google.

Petite Dinklage posted:

Someone buy me an Audi for Christmas

Soothing Vapors posted:

ill give u audiz nuts

Petite Dinklage posted:

Your nuts are much like an Audi diesel in that they are both being investigated for toxic emissions

Chantilly Say posted:

What's the name for the condition where you see hot jets everywhere you look?

Bertrand Hustle posted:

Yorkshire?

People often forget that what we think of as a particular regional accent is often a gigantic group of accents and dialects along a spectrum from "says words like 'pillow' and 'there' a bit differently" to "I can't understand a word this motherfucker is saying, is he even speaking English?"

Most Americans know like, two British accents: an exaggerated Cockney stereotype a la My Fair Lady, and ultra-posh RP.

No doubt these ladies would be mistaken for Irish in many parts of the US:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UCOC1YwNwZw

LORD OF BOOTY posted:

Jesus christ this thread took a weird turn

Solice Kirsk posted:

Song parody stuff is really only funny for like a line or two and even then it has to be perfect. Goons trying to Weird Al an entire Beatles song around World of Warcraft is almost always universally unbearable.

Trig Discipline posted:

Chichevache posted:

TFF chat

Chitin posted:

This is the gooniest loving thing I've ever heard and I make movies for a living.

Hoodwinker posted:

You get into murky territory, efficiency-wise, when you're already so filthy loving rich that "maxing your retirement accounts" is a blip on the radar in terms of wealth management. The rules break down, like exotic matter at super low temperatures or being a white person on trial for white-collar crime. Sure, you could donate that seven figures to cancer research or open a women's shelter, but when your precious little girl or tantrum-throwing little boy looks at you with those round, glassy eyes (maybe the Vicodin's kicking in) and says, "Daddy I need one, maybe two thoroughbred horses at my wedding." I mean, what's a father to do? What are we, savages? I remember when your grandfather used to sit me on his knee and tell me the story about when he tore the liver out of a still-living Nazi soldier with his bare hands while fighting in the War. Inside of that liver he found a nodule which when you held it just right up to the light looked like an American Bald Eagle. And he said, "That's how I knew the American Dream was still alive." And I believe him now to this day. My child will get married to their partner, a person with good bone structure and a name like "Kegan" or "Serah" or "Werstal" and there will be horses, damnit. There will be so many loving horses. The entire wedding party will be riding horses. Our god-fearing protestant minister will be riding a chestnut brown Belgian. Afterwards the horses will race, and the winner will be thrown into a crowd of women to determine who will be the next lucky bride. Horsemeat hors-d'oeuvres. A multi-layered chocolate cake, which itself will sit resting on a chocolate-colored living horse. My little girl will get her loving horses! Just like her grandfather wouldn't give his sweet daughter even though she had to take the hush money from the unnamed senator so they wouldn't drag his name through the mud in court. Horses! Horses!

sneakyfrog posted:

sooo ZZ top?

FactsAreUseless posted:

w00tmonger posted:

Male pattern baldness, right?

Code Jockey posted:

Ziv Zulander posted:

I can tell this isn't a loss edit because all four panels contain a tragedy

The Nards Pan posted:

So many picks in this game I'm going to start looking for people with disabilities hiding under trucks.

Powaqoatse posted:

POOL IS CLOSED posted:

Y'know, I don't think anyone ever put this one up, but it makes me laugh. I'm probably all ash inside though.

Syd Midnight posted:

I am surprised in a different way because I have this in my goons.txt:

its a fyad quote I saw in some previous SA Quotes thread, I've dug it up and applied it to "guess the thread" for a laff a few dozen times now and it has never been wrong.

Mr. Bad Guy posted:

Corny.

Besesoth posted:

Regarding the fire at Trump Tower:

Trazz posted:

Remember when Trump said he could kill someone on 5th Avenue and not lose any supporters?

He was right

Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:

I don't know why it bothers me that you chose that, instead of Flowers for Algernon, but it does, and I had to say something.

Still a pretty good story, though.

Hemingway To Go! posted:

I follow the thread and still don't understand how it's even in context

Zamboni_Rodeo posted:

NC, a quick pronunciation guide:

Mebane = Meh-ben (also acceptable: Meh-b'n)
Cashiers = Cash-ers (not those people working the check-out lanes at the store)
Corolla = Cor-ah-lah (do NOT pronounce it like your Toyota)
Beaufort = Boh-fort

God forbid you pronounce Beaufort like those scrubs in SC do. (Beuw-fort)

frankenfreak posted:

Not sure if that's a joke or d20 Modern.

Marcade posted:

He's excited because they promised he'd spend some time in the Minors.

SpacePig posted:

I'm enough of a fan of the "What's better than x?", "2x" joke structure, but for some reason the Granos one really elevates it. I crack up every time I see it.

Mr. Bad Guy posted:

Who was the goon that would make seemingly innocuous posts that eventually led into an explicit description of making GBS threads?

It was like a LoB level gimmick, to the point where you'd see a posts of a certain length and immediately check the user name.

Crow Jane posted:

The best thing I've heard on the subject is that pizza is like sex, even when it's bad it's still pretty good

theflyingorc posted:

I mostly have it alone in a dark room

BrianBoitano posted:

Absurd Alhazred posted:

They Rock

Wingnut Ninja posted:

ol qwerty bastard posted:

I mean, the obvious choice to show aliens we've entered the memetic phase of the information age:

We're not going to impress any aliens if we can't even come up with a lossless encoding scheme for our transmissions.

Malachite_Dragon posted:

Ah, okay, thank you. I knew about the hosting bit, used to watch it every morning while getting ready for school, just, the rumors were what was throwing me off.

Coq au Nandos posted:

Amazing. Some more winners from this thread of SA koans:

a cyberpunk goose posted:

A student lay before the master, peaceful in his long sleep.

The master, torch in hand, shook him by the shoulder. But the student did not wake. The master again shook the sleeping student. And again the student did not wake. The master’s head shook slowly and he whispered, “if only you would but sip from my cup of soul expanding tea. So many truths it could show you.”

The master gave the sleeping student one last shake before moving on in disappointment. But the student did not wake, for the student was but a skeleton.

1stGear posted:

If you wait seven months before killing them, is it less suspicious. Asking for a friend.

Besesoth posted:

Captainsalami posted:

Classic fencing reflex.

Big Grunty Secret posted:

Lobok posted:

In some countries WiFi is pronounced wee-fee so maybe it's the same as Sci-Fi.

Dixville posted:

See-ince feeection

System Metternich posted:

lmao, every single one of these is amazing

tribbledirigible posted:

The food has run out and long ago somebody left with the crop.