SA Decides, 1788-2000: If nominated, I will not run. If elected, I will not serve.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > SA Decides, 1788-2000: If nominated, I will not run. If elected, I will not serve.

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Adams/Pinckney in a well thought-out scheme.

# ¿ Dec 7, 2015 00:44

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# ¿ May 12, 2024 15:55

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Two slaveholders this time. :smith:

Voted for Jefferson, but really we should be voting to tear this awful nation to the ground.

# ¿ Dec 13, 2015 18:28

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Pretty soon enough time will have passed that we won't be able to make Hamilton jokes anymore. :smith:

# ¿ Dec 21, 2015 06:42

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Long live the President King.

# ¿ Dec 27, 2015 19:28

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Lord Cyrahzax posted:

I do like the Federalists, but I hate Britain far more. Let's show those tea-slurpers what for! Let's show them what American arms and resolve can do, show them that this is our continent!

Vive Madison and Vive la France!

oh poo poo i really should have voted for madison out of pure francophilia

oh well

# ¿ Dec 29, 2015 03:18

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Big government is good, slavery is bad.

# ¿ Jan 4, 2016 18:43

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

As Hamilton trash, we should know that Vice President isn't a real job anyway.

# ¿ Jan 20, 2016 07:07

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

I can't believe I voted for the loving anti-Mason party.

# ¿ Feb 1, 2016 00:12

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Maybe our new rule should be to vote for whoever would have died in office the soonest.

# ¿ Feb 8, 2016 03:52

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

I'm tempted to vote in William Henry Harrison just so him dying like a moron after a month is still in our version of history.

# ¿ Feb 14, 2016 19:48

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

At this point we're just killing time until Debs comes along, anyway.

# ¿ Feb 15, 2016 08:30

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

We must defeat the slaveocrats! Four more years!

# ¿ Feb 21, 2016 18:48

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

I was worried about the abolitionist vote being split this election, and then I realized that van Buren had an Adams on the ticket! The Free Soil Party represents a coalition of the most powerful political factions in the SA forums electorate.

# ¿ Feb 28, 2016 19:09

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Swanald Trump

# ¿ Mar 4, 2016 18:37

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

I just hope that, at the very least, we can all come together and elect Lincoln. I guess there weren't any wacky extra candidates or Adamses to split the anti-slavery vote, though. :v:

# ¿ Mar 4, 2016 22:54

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Pakled posted:

I feel like the worst part of this thread for QuoProQuid is going to be researching dozens of obscure Prohibition Party candidates who no goon will ever vote for anyway.

what if one of them is a secret adams though

# ¿ Mar 5, 2016 00:37

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

http://www.theonion.com/graphic/september-7-1901-10573

# ¿ Mar 8, 2016 21:24

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Free Soil, Free Labor, Free Speech, Free Men, Fremont, Freemasons. :mason:

# ¿ Mar 13, 2016 22:26

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

1488 posted:

SA Decides 1788-2000: Waiting to write-in Hitler

username/post combo

Also gently caress off Nazi.

# ¿ Mar 18, 2016 20:37

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

So, we're all voting for Lincoln, right? Okay, good.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2016 18:48

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Vote for Lincoln, that's good thinkin'

# ¿ Mar 21, 2016 18:49

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Gosh, I wonder who will possibly win this time?

# ¿ Apr 3, 2016 17:52

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

To be fair, even if Fremont were running, I'm pretty sure so few of us would have voted for loving McClellan he or Lincoln still would have won.

# ¿ Apr 3, 2016 22:45

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

i can't believe i voted against an adams

i can't believe i voted against an adams to vote for the loving prohibition party

# ¿ Apr 17, 2016 17:50

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Lycus posted:

John Quincy Adams II is a traitor to the Adams name.

if only we'd listened to hamilton and destroyed our own party to take out adams this never would have happened*

*this would happen because it happened in actual history

# ¿ Apr 17, 2016 18:00

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

if this thread ends reconstruction and un-wins the civil even sooner than real america did it would be proof for all time that goons are worthless imho

# ¿ Apr 18, 2016 06:30

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

*checks pocket watch impatiently* hmmm still not debs o'clock yet

# ¿ Apr 18, 2016 06:39

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

dongsbot 9000 posted:

no one in the 1800s actually thought there would ever be a black president right

that'd be as ridiculous as a anti-masonic president

I wish somebody would invent time travel just so somebody could tell Jefferson Davis about Barack Obama.

# ¿ Apr 19, 2016 18:53

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Raskolnikov38 posted:

it is mildly humorous that it took until 1863 to find a guy that could grasp such a basic concept

As much as I feel like that joke sells Grant short, we can point McClellan as a general whose failure was in large part due to his astonishing failure to realize that he, in fact, had more guys than the other side.

# ¿ Apr 28, 2016 03:11

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

I like how it says that the Compromise of 1850 "postponed the Civil War for 10 years" without saying what exactly that compromise was.

# ¿ Apr 28, 2016 19:46

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

The historical Hayes sold out Reconstruction to win the election so gently caress him.

Not really sure who else to vote for, though.

# ¿ May 1, 2016 21:13

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

I've decided to vote for the Greenbacks solely on the basis of Cooper's incredible beard. And I mean solely; I haven't even read his platform.

# ¿ May 1, 2016 21:53

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

I'm voting for Garfield solely so this Kate Beaton comic still exists in our timeline.

# ¿ May 9, 2016 20:25

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Voting for Harrison so that we can finally complete the work of the Revolution and vanquish the British once and for all.

# ¿ Jun 4, 2016 18:37

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Is Burr the only sitting Vice President or President to actually personally kill somebody while in office?

# ¿ Jun 10, 2016 01:58

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

Corek posted:

Where's the election results? Where's my pa????

gone to the white house, haw haw haw

# ¿ Jun 15, 2016 02:15

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

"Another election filled with bad candidates who all have something that makes them unelecta.................................... oh."

sniper4625 posted:

Only one, true, clear choice.

Let Marxism-Wingism be born!

# ¿ Jul 24, 2016 17:40

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

QuoProQuid posted:

Bellamy is a fascinating character in and of himself. His book, Looking Backwards, was the third-largest bestseller of the 19th century behind Uncle Tom's Cabin and Ben-Hur. Its popularity, in turn, inspired a pseudo-socialist poltical movement during the 1880s similar to the Fourier phalanxes of the 1840s. Had it not been for Bellamy's failing health and the unexpected rise of the Populists, the movement might have gained some steam. Bellamy recognized that "socialism" had become politically toxic and needed rebranding if it was to survive as a major force in the United States.

Looking Forward is filled with the delightful predictions and bizarre optimism that characterizes a lot of utopian fiction. For example, he envisions stores where you can buy literally anything which are delivered within 24 hours to your house via a complex tube network.

While I'm here and on the topic of bizarre futurism, I do want to highlight an absolutely phenomenal article published by The Strand magazine in 1893. The article's premise is that a mysterious book from the future is discovered. In the future, it seems, fashion has become a well-respected science "governed by immutable laws." The article then summarizes and illustrates the future trends in fashion, using the mysterious book as guidance. Here are some of the illustrations:

I love these so much.

# ¿ Jul 26, 2016 02:11

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# ¿ May 12, 2024 15:55

Empress Theonora: Feb 19, 2001; She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.

i wrote a paper on clarence darrow in middle school so i just can't bring myself to vote for bryan

# ¿ Jul 31, 2016 21:47

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > SA Decides, 1788-2000: If nominated, I will not run. If elected, I will not serve.