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this one I wish fashion SWAT was still updating so that this kind of thing wouldn't happen.
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Sep 29, 2016 00:13
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Sham bam bamina! posted:Why doesn't the book cover mention your writing for Something Awful? The writing is bad.
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Oct 17, 2016 21:44
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get that OUT of my face posted:any idiot can write for Cracked though. as in, you can send in a half-baked, poorly researched list and they'll probably publish it loving David Wong is a superstar at Cracked, and he's basically the Poochie of transgressive literature and probably many other facets of his life.
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Oct 18, 2016 04:22
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Defiance posted:You motherfuckers. You ungrateful bastards. You're lucky Asterios ever bothers to poo poo out these terrible weekly articles. He was a loving intern at The Onion, okay? He wrote a goddamn book for gently caress's sake. And you bitches have the audacity to sit here and criticize him for being an unfunny, self-promotional, hack of a loser that can barely put together a 200-word feature without tripping all over his own stupid dick? I AM ASHAMED BY MY WORDS AND DEEDS
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Oct 19, 2016 04:01
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At least this one reminded me of that story where DTJr. was a deadbeat alcoholic loser in college and one day elder Trump showed up and knocked on his son's dorm door. When he answered he was an obviously hungover unwashed mess and Donald slapped him so hard he fell to the ground, and said "Put on a suit and meet me outside" leaving his son splayed out on the ground like a rag doll. Anyway, article sucked.
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Nov 7, 2016 22:55
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Hey, it worked for Buzzfeed! It is especially cool and good after years of Something Awful taking user-submitted photoshop projects and slapping their watermark on it, something goons used to make fun of ebaumsworld for doing. im cute fucked around with this message at 21:51 on Nov 14, 2016 |
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Nov 14, 2016 21:49
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Asterios posted:ALERT: my hot new book is almost totally sold out of its first printing! If you wanna get your hands on this bad boy before Christmas, hop on Amazon, because they just bought out the very last of our stock. this looks like a book made out of a blog. this looks like a one-off article in a 2000s-era MAD Magazine. this looks like it was written by your boss's wife. this looks like a book that thinks Invader Zim was cancelled way too soon. this looks like the afterword should be "~if this made u smile, send it to 10 of ur friends! God Bless~" this looks like something your lovely uncle would get you as a last-minute christmas gift. he copped it from a Barnes & Noble 50% Off bin in between opening the plastic on the magazines and turning starbucks's largest table into his own personal study/reading room.
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Dec 13, 2016 01:01
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Dec 13, 2016 02:21
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John Dyne posted:My favorite Kaufman bit was when he just showed people pictures of boats with names like The SS Poop with no context or setup. You know, the thought of some beautiful 100-foot yacht being called, like, the SS Turds or something is sorta funny. I just don't know if it'd work with a regular boat, much less 8-10 regular boats one right after the other becaue really, it's just the one kinda middling joke.
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Dec 16, 2016 03:17
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Asterios posted:Up to 2K on Facebook alone! Thanks to all my "Vice President Babies" on the forums -- couldn't have done it without the fans! Aww that's sweet. I HATE SWEET. I NEED PHOTOS. PHOTOS OF LOWTAX.
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Dec 16, 2016 06:30
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try not jacking your rod for a week before writing, but then go hog wild while you are writing.
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Dec 21, 2016 18:33
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I feel like a "funny texts from your drug dealer" front page article has already been done, and fairly recently.Lonos Oboe posted:I gotta ask, Is Dirty Frank referencing the classic 2000AD character or the Pearl Jam song? Probably Filthy Frank
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Jan 12, 2017 20:10
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Capntastic posted:http://www.somethingawful.com/news/alt-right-tv/ BY GOD, SOMEONE GET THIS MAN A BOOK DEAL!!
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Jan 26, 2017 01:50
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Out of Band II posted:http://www.somethingawful.com/news/teen-emoji-code/ I have to hand it to this article. The footer contained a handy link to Zack's new article which I enjoyed. If I had never clicked on this other loving thing I may have never seen it!
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Feb 6, 2017 23:57
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https://www.somethingawful.com/news/thernovich-valentines-day/ I had written a long carepost about how lovely and unreadable and mystifying this article is, but I erased it. Suffice it to say: it sucks and you suck. Written lisps aren't funny. Written lisps where they don't make sense are extra not funny. Cernovich is a maddox-esque self-help manosphere moron, but not the delusional redpilled zorro you wrote about here. You keep switching between purple writing, alt-right language, and self-effacing oversharing, sometimes in the same sentence. You wrote the same "jerking off in the bathroom" joke twice but it was already trite and boring the first time. Misspelling words hasn't been funny, ironically or otherwise, in many years. Just gently caress off with the humor writing already.
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Feb 16, 2017 06:01
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If you're hungry for an article about an undersexed and pathetic weirdo that's actually funny as hell I recommend this one: http://www.somethingawful.com/news/letters-girl-lonely/
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Feb 16, 2017 22:35
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what is this garbage?
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Apr 10, 2017 06:42
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He's dead RIP
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Jul 7, 2017 03:00
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President Baby needs to... KEEP IT UP?!
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Sep 10, 2017 01:24
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