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empty sea posted:This guy doesn't know how to cook salmon in like half the ways he tries and then bitches about how it's not good. Fuckin' loser, wasting good salmon like that for some poo poo video. To be fair, it's not as bad as he did with his other videos where he lasered a steak or put a potato through the dishwasher or put an egg through a sauna or ironed a chicken or toasted a steak or every time he tosses some poo poo on a campfire with no goddamn idea of what he's doing or used a loving children's lightbulb EZ Bake Oven. Like if it was just a gimmick video of honestly trying to cook food in weird ways it'd be one thing, but it's not. He's not even very good at the normal human methods of cooking.
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Nov 1, 2019 06:34
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Wasabi the J posted:Honestly I want to see how people who "didn't cook" lived throughout history. There's a reason that for 200 years, Paris bakers had their vacations regulated to make sure that they don't all go on vacation at the same time. Bread was a major part of the diet, but like gently caress is everybody going to bake their own. A good baguette you can just nosh down on from one end to the other. I also kinda like stories about automats, which basically functioned like fast food but with even less human interaction. There's stuff about how people from all walks of life ate together at them, since there were plenty of different priced foods all available at once, but after fast food supplanted them, there wasn't much point to the whole gimmick.
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Nov 5, 2019 23:15
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They just have so much more blood than other fish. So much blood.
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Nov 7, 2019 06:34
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Tomatoes are kinda weird, unlike most fruit. I guess the closest is bell pepers, since you eat the colorful plant fiber in the same way, but then instead of cutting out or around the seeds, you just eat the seeds and the weird seed slime that they're suspended in along with. Makes for some inconsistent texture. Tomatoes are complicated. Still, a tomato slice is real good for broadening the flavor of a sandwich and getting a little more crunch. There's something about newer varieties being less sweet because the red coloring is prioritized, giving the tomato less chlorophyll for creating sugar, Whatever. Anyhow, content. 
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Nov 8, 2019 23:22
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Null of Undefined posted:If you’re putting tomatoes in guacamole you deserve to be shot and fed to dogs. If you mixed guacamole and ketchup, would a colorblind person ever notice? Casu Marzu posted:There are many adjectives I would use to describe a desirable sandwich tomato. Crunch is not one of them. I dunno man, they're harder than the floppy parts of a sandwich, even if they're not as noisy as lettuce. They make it feel like you're biting into something more than just some bread-swaddled meat, what do you wanna call that?
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Nov 9, 2019 01:12
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Most leaves with strong flavor get ground up and used sparingly, I don't get why cilantro just gets piled on like a maniac. Imagine eating a whole salad of cinnamon sticks. I've had some things with cilantro in them used sparingly that dissolves into the rest of the flavor profile rather than overpowering everything. Raw celery and cucumber have a similar effect of hijacking the entire flavor of a dish. Bell peppers are fine. Yellow bell peppers are distinctly Not pineapple, but being yellow and sweet they confuse me sometimes, even though there's a spice twang instead of a sour twang.
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Nov 9, 2019 19:02
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yeah I eat rear end posted:Are we going to argue about how "dressing" is really "stuffing" now? I feel like one is more useful as a unique identifier, since the other is already used for entirely different food product. Personally, my brain associates the former with the weird gross stuff I got in a cafeteria that never even saw a bird and had all the flavors wrong. 'course, I also don't get why people try throwing celery into it. Would.
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Nov 28, 2019 16:17
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There was that cool picture that made the rounds a while back of a trump supporter posting on facebook the lovely little sandwich and chips they were eating for thanksgiving because the rest of their family and friends severed them or vice-versa, and a bunch of fellow conservatives replying, trying to be cheery and insist No Actually it's a good thing we're all alone.AlbieQuirky posted:These two are almost certainly intentional, and attempts at Thompson’s Turkey. I wonder if anyone will ever try making a novelty squid ink/activated charcoal black turkey.
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Nov 28, 2019 22:47
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Have you considered the possibility that he was a russian spy?
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Dec 6, 2019 06:43
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Grand Fromage posted:I found some pics of that 50s theme restaurant that got posted some pages back, the one serving food on shovels. It seems weird to theme a restaurant around an era when China wound up getting hit by a devastating famine. I was trying to think something similar and the closest I got was a food that was eaten in desperation in Cambodia becoming a tourist attraction. That food is spiiiideeeeerrs  
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Dec 9, 2019 02:09
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  gschmidl posted:
I'd be willing to try it since I often eat food straight from a can, but not for actual celebratory purposes. Of course, since it's a food product being sold by a tech company, that often ends very badly.
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Dec 11, 2019 17:13
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At this point, I'm pretty sure that most maps like that are totally made up with no data. Also I'm surprised nobody reacted at the fish gonads. Even if you don't know what they are, that's a lot of gloop.
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Dec 12, 2019 18:40
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yeah I eat rear end posted:honestly I hardly ever eat them, they're like the ultimate low effort food, for when I can't be bothered to do anything better. Well, actually they'd come second to the true "I currently don't give a poo poo but don't want to feel hungry right now" meal of plain unseasoned white rice I eat sometimes, because with hot dogs you need to remember to buy a bun/bread. Yeah it's bland and mildly unpleasant, but it's edible. much like rear end. I used to eat plain tortillas as an emergency food. The moisture and texture is nice, but the flavor is mostly blank so that after you've shoved a few down your mouth, you have almost no memory of that happening. It's not a great way to live.
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Dec 15, 2019 22:07
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zedprime posted:Heated in a pan/hot pressed and you are nearly to tortilla chips and is a common snack for myself because store bought packages usually come with 500% more than I need for tacos or whatever. I haven't done it for a long while, but generally the idea was wanting something cheap with no preparation involved to shove into my mouth like an animal. It's not bad to have a nice humid tortilla, but it's real close to just taking a spoon to a bag of flour.
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Dec 16, 2019 18:42
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Zipperelli. posted:Content: No pizza rules, but there should ABSOLUTELY be rules on how to serve pizza. This is the result of one of those mathematically optimal cake-cutting strategies, isn't it? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kaMKInkV7Vs
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Dec 18, 2019 05:48
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I wound up going lunchless for a fair amount of middle school and high school. Not because of being actually unable to pay, but because after I ran out of money in the prepaid account, it took me a long while to remember to ask my parents to put more money in (which was either genuine memory issues or weird shyness about dealing with my own suffering, I don't know). I don't know if there were actual programs to deal with that at my school, I just took the hunger and maybe hunted for some quarters to use in a vending machine. That's probably not feasible these days, between less cash floating around to be dropped and higher prices in vending machines. It's insane that there's an elaborate system to establish a debt for kids and then shame and punish them for that debt, as if school cafeterias really need to watch their margins to maintain a profit. I guess at least it can teach kids that the world outside school is also filled with cruel institutions that want to gently caress them into the ground.
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Dec 18, 2019 17:40
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.Z. posted:The prep for spoon worms is even worse: A condom filled with sewage that you push out before chopping up the rubber.
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Dec 18, 2019 22:29
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Hey, that looks like Stupid Uncle Egg's Goodtime Diaper Pie. Finish it off with a nice desert of Great Uncle Pawdabber's Pre-tend Ice Cream Showdown.
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Dec 23, 2019 03:04
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See, that's clearly a fake picture, but this is all real. People want to taste their fish semen all over their mouths instead of just swallowing it.
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Dec 30, 2019 20:09
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Pastry of the Year posted:
Bad photography, but still would. Null of Undefined posted:I’ve had these. They’re actually okay. They don’t hold a candle to a normal pepperoni pizza, but even bad pizza is still good You have officially challenged the thread, you all know what to do.
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Dec 31, 2019 20:00
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AlbieQuirky posted:I will cut anybody who comes for Rhode Island pizza. Wikipedia has already pushed it out and classified it as "Italian Tomato Pie".
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Jan 1, 2020 03:24
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I'm honor bound to give Rhode Island a hard time. Grand Fromage posted:Here's one I think will horrify people who haven't lived in Korea but honestly isn't even close to peak Korea. That--he had like a tortilla or some kind of flatbread, but instead of creating the pizza upon it, he shredded it up? And then after piling stuff on he just used a spoon for the finished product? It's not even like it's something horrible, it's just a weird soup of melted cheese, but it can't be a pizza.
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Jan 1, 2020 06:12
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Call and raise. 
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Jan 1, 2020 06:35
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Admiral Joeslop posted:Could you lower it instead. Look I'm not gonna post some pictures of delicious fried clams in the gross looking food thread. WITCHCRAFT posted:Baby eels, loose corn, and pretzel sticks on a bun? What am I looking at here? A "chop suey sandwich". So on top of being wet and floppy, it's redundant since the filling's made from about the same thing as the bread.
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Jan 1, 2020 16:18
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I love corned beef, but it's pretty solidly on the list of foods that taste great but just look kinda gross.
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Jan 2, 2020 07:17
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Admiral Joeslop posted:Looks like...clams? And a bunch of vegetables? I was so afraid this was going to be somebody's idea of a pizza.
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Jan 5, 2020 18:32
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I look forward to seeing mayonnaise-haters purposefully conjuring the mayo of their nightmares.
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Jan 7, 2020 01:41
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JacquelineDempsey posted:Finally powered through that Paris video. Her hair was driving me insane, like she almost gets it in the cheese grater, it comes thiiiis close to dipping into the ricotta as she's stirring it, she keeps pulling it out of her eyes ever 4 seconds, etc. Then at 7 min in she warns us to watch your hair so you don't burn it on the range. I wanna know whose kitchen that is, since it's fully equipped and shows signs of use, but definitely she's not the one using it.
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Jan 18, 2020 01:10
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Fishstick posted:Is mayo in tubes a Euro only thing? It's not super common but it's definitely still around, but I've never seen it in any kind of US media Tubes like that are for toothpaste. America generally likes to have its condiment goop in big containers.
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Jan 21, 2020 06:37
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Wait, I thought we were still on the month where you didn't eat nuts.
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Jan 21, 2020 19:54
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Noslo posted:I'm adventurous, but I gotta say no thanks to maggot cheese Not really. If you think about it, most fermented foods already rely on much smaller wriggling little creatures eating and making GBS threads out the food item. Alcohol is a waste product. Maggots are just a larger version of yeast. Kinda reminds me of how fugu is risky to eat and there are non-poisonous pufferfish out there, but what gives pufferfish the taste that people love is the deadly poison.
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Jan 26, 2020 19:21
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I think the worst part is that you have to wear goggles in case they jump out into your eyeballs as you bring it up to your face. Blindness shouldn't be a worry when eating.
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Jan 26, 2020 22:09
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BMX Ninja posted:Eel is an acquired taste I think, but they're pretty great when prepared any other way except jellied. There's an eel fishery about 20 miles from me that exports them as a delicacy all across Europe. And so a bunch of the fancier restaurants around here often have eel dishes on the menu, usually with produce caught the same day. I've never eaten eel, but what stands out to me is just how much blood they had relative to their size in one youtube video on London's oldest fast food place. The final product doesn't look too attractive either, but that's not the eels' fault. Mashed potato and ground beef pie in a green sauce in bad lighting just looks kinda sad. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogfyJICT9aI And of course, the reason it really struck me how much blood they had when they were butchered was because I had gone down a youtube hole of videos of seafood being prepared, often in little street stalls, mostly on this channel. I watched more invertebrates like crab and snail, but even the big ol' fish didn't have nearly the amount of blood eels do. I'm sure most mammals and birds are full of blood too, but I just haven't seen those. Content warning: Like I said, animals being butchered.
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Jan 28, 2020 04:37
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ACES CURE PLANES posted:Stealing from another thread: It probably tastes awful, but I kinda want to try it. I'm not a fan of mangos either and fruit rice sounds weird.
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Jan 31, 2020 07:05
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eating only apples posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cc4PCVGJ580 What, the jam? I guess jam, cuke, egg, potato, ketchup, ketchup, and (possibly imitation) crab is a weird assortment, but it's not apocalyptic. I have no idea how they'd work together. Why do the japanese seemingly have a fixation with perfect cubes of food anyways? Cutting off crusts is weird.
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Feb 2, 2020 02:53
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TofuDiva posted:I need to know what this is... candy? It's soap. https://www.flickr.com/photos/soapylove/496306086 Edit: It feels like a crime to make soap that looks a lot like food 
SlothfulCobra has a new favorite as of 21:30 on Feb 4, 2020 |
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Feb 4, 2020 21:28
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Pastry of the Year posted:I cannot change the thread title every day Soap tends to be the opposite of anti-food porn anyways. It looks delicious but is actually disgusting to eat.      Immaculate, yet inedible. Gimme one of these any day.  It looks terrible but it's great.
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Feb 4, 2020 23:33
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Zil posted:Maybe some pizza rules are needed I mean if there's a massive hunk of non-edible junk in the middle of it, I think you could consider it not even a food item. Ror posted:This is pizza Lunchables erasure. Get your cracker rear end outta here.
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Feb 9, 2020 18:16
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This one I take issue with because clearly it hasn't been cooked yet so of course it doesn't look like a great pizza. It's not yet food. I guess also don't take some bites out of your zucchini beforehand.
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Feb 11, 2020 17:38
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This doesn't count as food in my eyes.
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Feb 13, 2020 05:01
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