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Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
Here is a table for you



Notice Leicester still top? nice, nice.



Games of import:
West Ham v Arsenal on the early saturday kickoff decides whether or not Arsenal have a chance at second, and whether West Ham have a chance at fourth. This will be blood and thunder, and West Ham will either win or be cheated again. Either way we probably won't come fourth, expect some top tier bitterness from the Daves at the end of the season. Jack Wilshere is apparently playing football, but he isn't going to play today. If he does, Kouyate will probably snap him like a twig.

Palace v Norwich is a game between two loving dreadful sides, a Norwich win heaps pressure on the northern powerhouses of Tyne and Wear as well as dragging world-class manager of 2013 Alan Pardew closer to his natural home of the championship.

Southampton are in kinda poo poo form so this is an absolute must-win for the Newcie Browns and their new-look still-crap side under Rafa Benitez, the man with the name and appearance of a spanish waiter.

The big feast is definitely Sunday, where we'll see Leicester continue their march towards a well-deserved title and Gary Linekers underwear. gently caress Sunderland, gently caress big sam, don't gently caress children.

Liverpool are in something approaching form but come up against a Stoke side of CL rejects and all their ('Pool) players are broken. Expect Stoke to continue being decent without being spectacular.

The late Sunday game, Spurs v Man United, is a massive match for both teams. Spurs need to win to have a chance at their first title in I honestly don't care how long, and Man United better loving lose and not continue an impressive rally to fourth place as they decide that Van Gaal is actually good enough for now.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cXxqmAxDlYU

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Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
I can't even spell MDT. Christ almighty.



:siren: BIG ANDY:siren: starts. Curbstomping is frowned upon, we'll do it anyway.

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
oh dear Andy

stop doing that

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
that was a proper reducer

I quite like that we've stumbled into the wingback system, Antonio and Cress are both great at it

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Bogan Krkic posted:

Tbh I think it'll be closer to a 4231, Antonio will be much higher than Cresswell

Bilic has the team playing really fluidly, Tomka roams around defending and tucks inside for crosses, Antonio coveres the flank, Noble prowls everywhere, and then the forwards just do whatever the gently caress they like. It's cool, I'm a fan.

oliwan posted:

how is that not a red btw?

everyone knows that you get a free hack in the first ten minutes

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Karl Sharks posted:

haven't watched much west ham, were the last two games a blip for lanzini or something else?

Lanzini is great and has had a few injury problems, the fans were chanting to sign him permanently back in october. He's stepping up a little bit but he's been one of our best players, and he's clearly the most gifted aside from Payet at the club.

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
Lanzini you twat stay onside

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
wait what the gently caress, he was on

that's a goal

Insurrectionist posted:

Turns out he did!

the refs are just not giving us a loving break

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

MoPZiG posted:

oh look we are getting hosed by the refs again...

what the hell is going on, we're getting absolutely robbed

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Karl Sharks posted:

It All Evens Out In The End

we should be third and through in the cup, it's getting utterly ridiculous

OH gently caress OFF

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
this is a loving farce

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
I hope Julian Dicks breaks someone's legs

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

oliwan posted:

west ham's strategy seems to be to try and snap off all arsenal ankles.

clearly we should be snapping the ref's ankles, as they've consistently been the best man on the field against us

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
let's just dribble back and forth 20 yards out

oliwan posted:

er, you should be playing with 9 at this point

absolute bollocks, Carroll's tackle isn't a red, I don't even know who you're referring to. Howard loving Webb thinks we're being badly ref'd against.

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
we're having our best season ever, I don't even care about the CL, but this has been going on a full month and it's getting incredibly bitter that the referees keep loving cheating us

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

oliwan posted:

west ham supporters getting very salty itt

I'm melting down

everton, man united, chelsea, palace, now arsenal

three non-penalties, offside goal, wrongful red card.

we were having such a fun season

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
in croatia, when we have something we cannot say, we have a saying, so I am walking on eggs

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
aight that was a good goal

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
Reid and Adrian have been terrible since Reid came back

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Bogan Krkic posted:

Andy Carroll is so slow

he's got to come off for Valencia before he gets himself sent off

he's also got to go away and never play for us again

Reid for Oxford too imo

Loving Africa Chaps posted:

:qq: our only strategy against arsenal is to kick them why aren't we in the champions league :qq:

lol we already scored against you in this game

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
andy carroll you have one job, loving smash that

Loving Africa Chaps posted:

No you didn't it was offside

now we've scored two

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
our team is so bloody temperamental

utterly crap after 1-0, now everyone is demanding the ball

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Loving Africa Chaps posted:

lump it up to the big man, liquid football

absolutely lol

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Loving Africa Chaps posted:

lump it up to the big man, liquid football

you gon cry like a bitch when Payet finishes you

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
I never thought I'd say this but we really need Moses on at half time

Shoren posted:

Lmao how many West Ham supporters wanted Andy off 5 minutes ago?

Im v glad to be wrong op

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

MoPZiG posted:

for who?

we need Obiang on for Antonio to play some proper defense.

otoh that's taking off our only right-side crosses when Andy's up for a hattrick. I don't think Bilic will make the defensive sub.

We need James Collins.

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Eau de MacGowan posted:

can someone give me a big andy status update???

he's slow, lazy, one dimensional

but drat that one dimension is absurd

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
we're gonna get a soft penalty, Andy's gonna smash it down the middle terminator style, and I will post "it all evens out in the end"

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
hahahaha Antonio to right back, Tomka off, Emineke on

Bilic is a nutter

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
bilic is going to kill someone

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Loving Africa Chaps posted:

dive and correct free kick

yeah you can't really wrestle defenders like that

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
MICKY TONY

ANDY CARROLL

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

TwoDogs1Cup posted:

The ref is doing good best to gently caress over West ham

it's just not enough though, we're too loving good

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
Carroll is going to rout them

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Eau de MacGowan posted:

lol tactical trip blinding the referee

Mark Noble is a footballing genius

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
Antonio is absolutely dominating the entire flank, phwoar, he's a unit

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
ffs Gabriel was lucky

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
Dimi's woken up

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
that was a cracking game and the referee was loving awful, can't really moan much

Payet thinks he's di canio now and needs to calm down a bit

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Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Bogan Krkic posted:

Ran out of legs, needed another sub to shore it up

I don't think Bilic rates Valencia any more than I do and I don't think anyone but Obiang would've been able to keep up with the tempo, Arsenal broke at ridiculous speed. Still not sure why Obiang didn't come on, but we had nobody to do what Carroll was able to in the air

also Koscielny was monstrous

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