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give me twenty, maggot! *trainee Maggot (friendly nickname) hugs sergeant for 20 full seconds* |
# ? May 9, 2016 22:34 |
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# ? Apr 29, 2024 07:40 |
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"What are you doing here soldier?" "smoking weed erryday?" "Ayyyy lmao! pass that poo poo."
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# ? May 9, 2016 22:36 |
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Give me a total of 10,000kg lifted/moved in 60min! Gogo!
<3 <3 Vanisher |
# ? May 9, 2016 23:09 |
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Chill Sergeant: Hup-One, let's have some fun! Hup-Two buckle my shoe! Hup-Three come Hup with me! Bring it on down Recruits: Fun Shoe Hup with you, Fun Shoe, HUP MORE!!! https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
# ? May 9, 2016 23:20 |
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sergeant: i will unscrew your head and poo poo down your neck! me: hey i think i heard that line before. its from fullmetal jacket right sergeant: haha yeah. great movie
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# ? May 9, 2016 23:44 |
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Sarge: Sleep tight, ladies, because tomorrow we're getting up at the crack of dawn for a 5-mile run private: that's too early for me, can we do it later? Sarge: ok
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# ? May 9, 2016 23:54 |
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Saint Isaias Boner posted:Sarge: Sleep tight, ladies, because tomorrow we're getting up at the crack of dawn for a 5-mile run ---------------- |
# ? May 10, 2016 02:14 |
What is your minor malfunction?! No seriously I want to help. ---------------- |
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# ? May 10, 2016 02:44 |
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fall in! *takes hit from a bong hanging around his neck* |
# ? May 10, 2016 02:58 |
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"Atten-HUT!" *everyone stands at attention* "haha okay guys you can chill now." *no one moves a muscle* *sigh* "at ease." |
# ? May 10, 2016 03:03 |
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Look to your left! Now look to your right! By the end of the year, one or more of these people will probably be your best friend! Any questions?
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# ? May 10, 2016 03:06 |
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City of Glompton posted:Look to your left! Now look to your right! By the end of the year, one or more of these people will probably be your best friend! Any questions? |
# ? May 10, 2016 03:24 |
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I bet you could suck a golf ball through a garden hose! That's really impressive, remind me to have you show me that one day
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# ? May 10, 2016 03:24 |
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"I've met your mother and she is a very nice person."
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# ? May 10, 2016 13:49 |
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Welcome to the Marine Corp glee club! I wanna see you hit those high notes, ain't that right Private Joker? AAAAHHHHHH!! OUTSTANDING! I oughtta take you home to sing a duet with my sister! I bet you'd like that, wouldn't you private Joker? AAAAHHHHHH!! https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
# ? May 10, 2016 14:23 |
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"My name is Gunnery Sergeant Hartman of the United States Marine Corp Tech Support! Private, what is your major malfunction?!"
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# ? May 10, 2016 14:58 |
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Listen up, kittens! You will clean this bathroom to a perfect shine every day for the next three months! For this task, your only tool will be the latest Swiffer® WetJet®
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# ? May 10, 2016 15:17 |
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City of Glompton posted:Look to your left! Now look to your right! By the end of the year, one or more of these people will probably be your best friend! Any questions? lol |
# ? May 10, 2016 21:47 |
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I don't know but I've been told . . . . Puppy noses are mighty cold . . . . Nice dogs . . Good dogs . . (tghere are happy doggies walking along with the marching trainees) |
# ? May 10, 2016 22:29 |
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Drill Sergeant: I DON'T KNOW BUT I'VE BEEN TOLD! Recruits: I DON'T KNOW BUT I'VE BEEN TOLD! Drill Sergeant: I FORGET CUZ I AM STONED! Recruits: WE FORGET CUZ WE ARE STONED! Drill Sergeant: DID WE HIT THE BONG? Recruits: WE DID! Drill Sergeant: IS IT WEAK OR STRONG? Recruits: GOOD poo poo! https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
# ? May 10, 2016 22:49 |
306 reporting 9 man 10 man total, private tensing found a wounded dove Sgt: why is no one comforting him ---------------- |
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# ? May 10, 2016 23:03 |
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Splatmaster posted:Drill Sergeant: I DON'T KNOW BUT I'VE BEEN TOLD!
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# ? May 11, 2016 00:27 |
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Private RZNV, finishing reassembling a proto pipe: DONE DRILL SERGEANT! Drill Sergeant: RZNV! Why did you put your pipe together so quickly, RZNV? Private RZNV: Because you told me to, Drill Sergeant? Drill Sergeant: Jesus H. Christ! This is a new company record! If it wouldn't be such a waste of a drat-fine enlisted man I'd recommend you for OCS! You are gonna be a general someday, RZNV, now pack that pipe and pass to the left... |
# ? May 11, 2016 05:55 |
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alnilam posted:give me twenty, maggot! there was this drill sergeant who was this lanky guy who could run like a 4 minute mile. his hat holder thing that keeps the brim straight had boba fett and darth vader carved onto it. he once referred to the group of trainees as 'his clone troopers'. huge star wars EU fan. when he was passing out mail one day the company commander walked by and somebody jumped up and tried to call attention and he was like 'sit the gently caress down' and the company commander laughed, and after he had left he was like 'listen, if darth vader is sitting here addressing you, you don't jump up and interrupt because the emperor walks in.' anyway, the story has nothing to do with how much this man loves star wars. there was this one guy who just shook like a loving leaf every time was about to fire a gun, he was just terrified of them. he was the last person to qualify and he had bragged about how he use to go hunting with his dad all the time and he'd do great, but apparently it was totally a lie judging by his reaction to the m16a4. everybody else had manage to get a 3 shot grouping in the same area (for sighting the weapon) and he was still struggling and he had the star wars drill sergeant guy standing over him while he tried and tried and tried. The guy just started verbally berating him and then finally was like 'jesus loving christ private, do you need a hug??' and the guy goes 'YES DRILL SERGEANT' and drops his gun and hops up and hugs the drill sergeant. everyone was like WHAT THE gently caress (silently) because like in basic these days, they will never ever strike you... unless you put your hands on them, then its kind of like you gave them permission. the guy's eyes just bugged out and he just stood there for a second then he hugged the guy, and he hopped back down and got ready for another try. everyone was dead silent, and the drill sergeant goes, 'You better get that grouping now motherfucker.' And he did! I guess the hug helped. He faced no further punitive action that I know of. |
# ? May 11, 2016 06:03 |
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I'm glad that even in an adversarial situation, the natural reaction is to hug back |
# ? May 11, 2016 14:09 |
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Can love bloom on the battlefield? Signs point to yes |
# ? May 11, 2016 14:10 |
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10 signs your drill sergeant may be a chill sergeant: You won't believe #7!
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# ? May 11, 2016 14:56 |
GIVE ME 20 HAPPY TREES YOU SON OF A GUN!!!!!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5Wo1ubuzAE Master sergeant who served 20 years in the USAF. ---------------- |
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# ? May 11, 2016 15:21 |
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a purrfect day for basic (litter box) training? maybe not so much!
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# ? May 11, 2016 16:55 |
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FutonForensic posted:a purrfect day for basic (litter box) training? maybe not so much! It took a lot of lolling about on the floor, rolling around and rubbing all that kitty fur to make the floor that shiny and buff. The joys of being a Chill Sergeant! Chill Sergeant: WHEN I SAY JUMP YOU SAY Recruits: REAL HIGH CHILL SERGEANT WE LIKE IT WE LOVE IT MAKE US SMOKE MORE OF IT MMMM CHILL SERGEANT HOOKAH! https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
# ? May 11, 2016 17:12 |
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WE'RE GONNA BREAK YOU DOWN AND BUILD YOU UP AGAIN [team-building task involving sergeant's LEGO collection] |
# ? May 11, 2016 18:18 |
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This is my rifle, there are many like it so if anyone needs another I can go grab another. My rifle is pretty friendly; but it's a gun. I must make sure to always have the safety on Without me, my rifle is useless. Without my rifle, I only have a college degree. I must not fire at other people. I must shoot straighter than my enemy who is trying to hit the bullseye like I am. I must shoot my bullseye before he does. I know that what counts in life is that you feel good and that you help others. my rifle does not know a thing because it is a gun. My rifle is not human, it is a gun. Thus, I will learn about it as an instrument that must be operated with safety in mind. I will learn when I can shoot, when to not shoot, what type of ammunition it uses, and where it is acceptable to bring it. I will keep my rifle clean and ready, even as I am clean and ready. It will become a source of recreation. Before whoever, I swear this creed. My rifle and I will only interact when it is safe to operate. I am the master of my recreational activities. We will listen to the shooting range staff. So be it, until the shooting range is closed or I am bored, and tired!
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# ? May 13, 2016 02:10 |
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We don't need experience, we give it! You won't read it in a book... you live it! Pick a service, take a challenge, set yourself apart! Army! Navy! Air Force! Marines! What a great place, what a great place- TO CHILL! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRe2yR2E-IU https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
# ? May 13, 2016 17:03 |
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chill sgt: WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION!? me: depression. chill sgt: me...me too. [deep tearful hug ensues]
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# ? May 14, 2016 01:09 |
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let me see your cool face
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# ? May 16, 2016 14:25 |
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I'm going to cut off your head and poo poo down your neck. I've never done that before and I'm nervous but you said you're into that on your dating profile and I'll try it, for you.
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# ? May 16, 2016 19:23 |
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this isgood Thread |
# ? May 17, 2016 02:05 |
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Chill sergeant finds Pyle lighting a bong up in the toilets. It escalates into a full blown puff 'n' pass.
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# ? May 17, 2016 10:30 |
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"There is no racial bigotry here. Here, you are all equally loved and cherished."
Somebody fucked around with this message at 15:04 on May 17, 2016 |
# ? May 17, 2016 14:06 |
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# ? Apr 29, 2024 07:40 |
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maporfic posted:"There is no racial bigotry here. Here, you are all equally loved and cherished." haha Somebody fucked around with this message at 15:04 on May 17, 2016
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# ? May 17, 2016 14:45 |