We need to build a wall!

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > We need to build a wall!

Facebook Aunt: Oct 4, 2008; wiggle wiggle

These loving illegals sneaking across the border are just too much. They aren't sending their best. Criminals.

http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/new-brunswick/alien-enters-canada-on-air-mattress-1.3755079

quote:

Maine man jailed for floating to New Brunswick on air mattress
John Bennett, 25, had been denied entry into Canada because of mischief charges
The Canadian Press Posted: Sep 09, 2016 2:31 PM AT

A young U.S. resident, driven by what he said was a desire to protect his Canadian girlfriend, used an air mattress to float across the St. Croix River in southeastern Maine and illegally enter New Brunswick late Wednesday, a Crown prosecutor says.

Twenty-five-year-old John Bennett told police he had earlier tried to cross the border at Calais, Maine, but customs officers denied him entry because he was facing mischief charges in the U.S., lawyer Peter Thorn said Thursday.

"He was told by the officer that until he got those cleared up, he wouldn't be admitted into Canada," the prosecutor said.

Bennett was sentenced Thursday to two months in jail.

Thorn said the provincial court in Saint John, N.B., was told Bennett purchased an air mattress at the local Walmart, inflated it and later used a wooden board to paddle across to an area near Ledge Road, southeast of St. Stephen, N.B.

However, a local resident spotted the man, and he was later arrested by the RCMP and charged with failing to appear at the border crossing as required by the Immigration and Refugee Protection Act.

"He was wet and carrying his boots ... [and] walking towards the town," said Thorn, a lawyer representing the federal Public Prosecution Service of Canada.

Before Bennett pleaded guilty to the charge Thursday, he told police he had to reach his pregnant girlfriend in Canada because he was worried for her safety, Thorn said.

"He said she had an ex-boyfriend who was threatening her, but that hasn't been confirmed by the other party," he said.

Bennett has no fixed address but is believed to live in Calais.

The prosecutor said he had heard of people swimming across the river before, but he said the air mattress method was a novel approach.

As for the judge hearing the case, Thorn said he told the accused: "Pardon the pun, but it seems to me you wanted to get there, come hell or high water."

"Canadian girlfriend" Sure, buddy, everyone believes that.

A few weeks ago 1500 drunk americans "accidentally" invaded and we had to pay to bus them all back home. Not good americans either, these ones were from detroit. http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2016/08/24/port-huron-float-down_n_11679498.html

quote:

�Keep in perspective that if the same situation had happened on the American side, having dealt with Homeland Security for many years, I would suggest � that the reception would have been not as friendly."

I'm not quite sure how we'll build a wall through bodies of water, but obviously something has to be done.

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:09

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# ? May 3, 2024 07:40

Sophy Wackles: Dec 17, 2000; > access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.

Well if Mexico builds our wall and we build your wall and maybe you build Russia's wall and so on, then everyone could have walls!

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:12

Facebook Aunt: Oct 4, 2008; wiggle wiggle

Pawn 17 posted:

Well if Mexico builds our wall and we build your wall and maybe you build Russia's wall and so on, then everyone could have walls!

Maybe Oprah could help. She has lots of money.

You get a wall! And you get a wall! and you get a wall!

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:22

Mumpy Puffinz: Aug 11, 2008; Nap Ghost

GRRM Martin was right!

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:23

sofokles: Feb 7, 2004; Fuck this

you may have my brick
i have no use for it
you'd have to come and get it

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:24

let it mellow: Jun 1, 2000; Dinosaur Gum

the wall fuckin owns

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:26

let it mellow: Jun 1, 2000; Dinosaur Gum

run like hell is the best song on the wall

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:26

sofokles: Feb 7, 2004; Fuck this

jackyl posted:

the wall fuckin owns

it fuckin does

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:28

blugu64: Jul 17, 2006; Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face?

Make Canada Great Also

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:35

Mumpy Puffinz: Aug 11, 2008; Nap Ghost

jackyl posted:

run like hell is the best song on the wall

i also like run like hell

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:37

Sophy Wackles: Dec 17, 2000; > access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.

blugu64 posted:

Make Canada Great Also

Annex Canada and Mexico imo. We get a troop bonus for holding all of North America. Also we can save on wall costs.

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:37

Mumpy Puffinz: Aug 11, 2008; Nap Ghost

blugu64 posted:

Make Canada Great Also

lol

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:37

LT56: Sep 9, 2016; by Smythe

Pawn 17 posted:

Annex Canada and Mexico imo. We get a troop bonus for holding all of North America. Also we can save on wall costs.

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:37

hey welcome to the show!: Jan 22, 2014; nobody loves me

But what if Regan comes back from the dead and starts demanding that we tear down all these walls? Could we even say no? He was convincing enough to get Gorbachev to do it and all he had to do was bribe him with Disney land.

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:52

etalian: Mar 20, 2006

Usually american invasions of canada don't go so well.

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:55

LT56: Sep 9, 2016; by Smythe

etalian posted:

Usually american invasions of canada don't go so well.

really not that bad. u could become a rollercoaster enthusiast during the process for example. always look at the bright side !

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:57

Mumpy Puffinz: Aug 11, 2008; Nap Ghost

etalian posted:

Usually american invasions of canada don't go so well.

Its been a couple of hundred years. We should probably try again

# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:57

Facebook Aunt: Oct 4, 2008; wiggle wiggle

Pawn 17 posted:

Annex Canada and Mexico imo. We get a troop bonus for holding all of North America. Also we can save on wall costs.

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:01

etalian: Mar 20, 2006

Pawn 17 posted:

Annex Canada and Mexico imo. We get a troop bonus for holding all of North America. Also we can save on wall costs.

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:02

NomChompsky: Sep 17, 2008

how bout i build a wall around your face with my fist huh ya fuckin nerd

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:03

LT56: Sep 9, 2016; by Smythe

Mumpy Puffinz posted:

Its been a couple of hundred years. We should probably try again

Mexico seems like a nice place to unionize with. It'll be cool to see a powerful 3 again

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:04

Mumpy Puffinz: Aug 11, 2008; Nap Ghost

LT56 posted:

Mexico seems like a nice place to unionize with. It'll be cool to see a powerful 3 again

you have not said a thing that I understand today.

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:08

Opie_Yates: Nov 30, 2010

jackyl posted:

run like hell is the best song on the wall

nah it's young lust. close 2nd, though.

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:08

drans: Sep 1, 2016; Ramrod XTreme

Pawn 17 posted:

Annex Canada and Mexico imo. We get a troop bonus for holding all of North America. Also we can save on wall costs.

too many browns tho

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:16

Facebook Aunt: Oct 4, 2008; wiggle wiggle

folandi posted:

too many browns tho

Canada will balance that out. We're white as hell. 36 million people, of which 77% are white. Hardly any blacks or hispanics at all.

76.7% European
14.2% Asian
4.3% Aboriginal
2.9% Black
1.2% Latin American
0.5% multiracial
0.3% other

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:36

Mumpy Puffinz: Aug 11, 2008; Nap Ghost

Facebook Aunt posted:

Canada will balance that out. We're white as hell. 36 million people, of which 77% are white. Hardly any blacks or hispanics at all.

76.7% European
14.2% Asian
4.3% Aboriginal
2.9% Black
1.2% Latin American
0.5% multiracial
0.3% other

what does other mean if you already have multiracial?

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:38

Facebook Aunt: Oct 4, 2008; wiggle wiggle

Mumpy Puffinz posted:

what does other mean if you already have multiracial?

Dunno. Maybe that's arabs?

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:40

Julius CSAR: Oct 3, 2007; by sebmojo

jackyl posted:

run like hell is the best song on the wall

this is 100% true

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:47

LT56: Sep 9, 2016; by Smythe

Intersectional populations are pretty neat.

# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:48

Father_Johann: Aug 28, 2008

I'm all for the wall because, with that much wall, the chances of glory holes skyrockets.

# ? Sep 11, 2016 00:23

Egbert Souse: Nov 6, 2008

Go on judge, poo poo on 'im

# ? Sep 11, 2016 00:29

Mumpy Puffinz: Aug 11, 2008; Nap Ghost

Father_Johann posted:

I'm all for the wall because, with that much wall, the chances of glory holes skyrockets.

lol

# ? Sep 11, 2016 00:29

sluggo is mad: Jan 14, 2012; Buglord

NomChompsky posted:

how bout i build a wall around your face with my fist huh ya fuckin nerd

poo poo bout to jump off in the canadia wall thread

# ? Sep 11, 2016 01:12

Facebook Aunt: Oct 4, 2008; wiggle wiggle

sluggo is mad posted:

poo poo bout to jump off in the canadia wall thread

Canadians have a lot of deeply repressed rage.

# ? Sep 11, 2016 01:29

Noun Verber: Oct 12, 2006; Cool party, guys.

Port Huron isn't Detroit you retard. I thought you beaver eaters (not the good kind) were supposed to be smart, but every time I meet a canadian they're all just dumb white people.

# ? Sep 11, 2016 19:02

Father_Johann: Aug 28, 2008

The Chinese made a GREAT WALL you can see from space and for THOUSANDS OF YEARS that GREAT WALL has kept out ALL MEXICANS from China!!!

# ? Sep 12, 2016 01:20

King Possum III: Feb 15, 2016

Father_Johann posted:

The Chinese made a GREAT WALL you can see from space

That's an urban legend.

# ? Sep 12, 2016 07:26

Worldshatter: May 7, 2015; PEPSI for TV-GAME

have you considered going with a big sign that says "no illegals please"?

seems cheaper and more canadian

# ? Sep 12, 2016 07:55

Helical Nightmares: Apr 30, 2009

No one other than me surprised he managed this on an air mattress?

# ? Sep 12, 2016 07:58

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# ? May 3, 2024 07:40

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Father_Johann posted:

I'm all for the wall because, with that much wall, the chances of glory holes skyrockets.

Here's a picture of them drilling the hole for ur mom to service men through.

# ? Sep 12, 2016 07:59

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