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ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

graham cracker posted:

If NSM ever committed suicide the most likely cause would be that he teamed up with himself.

Newspaper Scarlet Spider.

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ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Mole Man should hold a democratic election. Like Johnny Storm did.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Synthbuttrange posted:



if you say so

The only thing remaining in Peter's brick-brained skull are detailed facts about Roman history.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Alhazred posted:

Has Peter Parker made a pact with the devil in the newspaper strips too?

Why do you think he's trapped in an infinite time loop?

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

gimme the GOD drat candy posted:

if he isn't tyrannus, it is possible that the coked up pr guy will save the day by making tyrannus a star, thus leaving subterranea open for melvin man's return.

We can safely assume it won't be Spider-Man saving the day

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

SilverSupernova posted:

Did they actually post those Spider-verse strips in newspapers at some point or were they just in one of the SV side books?

It was just in a side book.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

The expression on Lenny's face in the last panel is a thing of beauty.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

enigmahfc posted:

He's just staring at May's sweet rack.

That's how you get into Trouble.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

I could totally see Spider-Man bonding with Ant-Man over the fact he also has an Aunt.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

mind the walrus posted:

Ok, now I know there's like, GILF porn out there and all that, but as someone who has worked with the elderly I have no earthly clue what is attractive about Aunt May. Even by old lady standards she's a doddering idiot with tissue skin.

Mole Man is banking on the light reboot to match the cinematic universe where she suddenly morphs into Marisa Tomei.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Aunt May's smile confirms she is a straight-up mole digger.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Synthbuttrange posted:



Lenny and Linny.

Moleman has ridden the mighty moon worm.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

X-O posted:

I would believe that Stan Lee said to Larry "Do an arc with Rocket Raccoon" or "Have Mole Man try to marry Aunt May again" but that's about as far as I'd believe that Stan has any input in this strip. Stan Lee is not writing a comic strip at 94 years old. That I do not buy at all.

Especially now. :smith:

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

God drat it, I'm going to be upset when they don't get married at this point

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Please let them live happily ever after. :smith:

Can we get Newspaper Spider-Man to sell his marriage to Mephisto to preserve Aunt May and Mole Man's?

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Yvonmukluk posted:

Maybe he should be called Swole Man now.

Excuse me his name is Swelvin.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

I love Newspaper Spider-Man so much.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Melvin just seems in such despair. :smith:

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Batman Odyssey is too good for this world.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

So, just to be clear here:

The most likely outcome is that Tyrranus is defeated by his own wife, not by Spider-Man.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Synthbuttrange posted:



oh hey a slap across the face, they're definitely teaming up.

Spider-Man is uncomfortably turned on right now.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Push El Burrito posted:

This is the year 2000 dude they have measuring cups.

What do you think he is, a peasant?

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Ikasuhito posted:

Well if my very life depended on having a chalice at very strict intervals, i'd probably try to have like fifty everywhere.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

So just to be clear here:

Spider-Man is doing all this for no reason at all, right?

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

ManlyGrunting posted:

Naw Mole Man managed to actually hook up with someone

Careful, that's bannable now.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

mind the walrus posted:

So Tyrannus is one hell of a cradle robber? It's 4 am and I'm trying to parse this

To be fair when you're 1500 years old your same-age dating opportunities are limited to... Aunt May.

Oh. Oh poo poo.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

So Spider-Man is the real villain of this story arc.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Synthbuttrange posted:


Whatever you say PETER

I loving love that Mole Man is just like 'yeah sure whatever Peter."

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

I hate you, Peter Parker. I hate you so much that right now the Venom symbote is looking for me.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

ZeroCount posted:

i'm digging the decision to just cut the panel off halfway through Peter's face. Not sure why but I like it.

It leaves you just enough to imagine how horrified Peter's expression is

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

gimme the GOD drat candy posted:

unfortunately, it's gotta be curt rather than mj. this is all deliberately set out in the middle of nowhere, so spiderman can't just pop in with no explanation and i don't think even nsm is dumb enough to reveal his secret identity to the only dude who is more of a mess than he is.

it'd be way better with lizard mj, though.

Mole Man totally figured out Peter's secret identity last arc.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Surprisingly violent for a newspaper comic.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

bunnyofdoom posted:

You really think MJ and PEter don't use webs as bondage stuff?

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007


ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

I love Peter's logic here.

Step A: Tear my shirt open as the Hulk charges at me
Step B: Wait, the Hulk recognized my uniform! No time to change!
Step C: My so-called secret identity!

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ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Isn't this basically She-Hulk's origin story?

Looking forward to Connors turning into a ripped as hell hot green dude.

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