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MeLKoR posted:
This cannot be real. If this is real, freep has finally broken my brain. It's soooooo close, and then  This kind kind man gave my family free medical treatment when we were poor, such a noble Christian soul. Then I found out he cares about helping poor people more than being filthy rich, what a loving idiot! I feel like Jesus must have had a parable about someone exactly like this freeper. E: Found it, he's this guy Matthew 18:21-35 posted:[T]he Kingdom of Heaven is like a certain king, who wanted to reconcile accounts with his servants. When he had begun to reconcile, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. But because he couldn't pay, his lord commanded him to be sold, with his wife, his children, and all that he had, and payment to be made. The servant therefore fell down and knelt before him, saying, 'Lord, have patience with me, and I will repay you all!' The lord of that servant, being moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt. VitalSigns fucked around with this message at 13:33 on Sep 23, 2016 |
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Sep 23, 2016 13:21
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Even "heterosexual gays" didn't baffle me this much. I don't think this can be exceeded. Like heterosexual gays sounds insane but if you put yourself in the mind of a freeper you can be like "well if God made sex for procreation only, then gay sex was how people would get around that back in the day, now with birth control and abortion straight people are imitating gays' ability to have the sex without the babies" so okay I see where they're going with that. They're a weirdo fundy who defines gay as "no-baby sex" hence straight people using birth control are heterosexual gays. This guy though, is breaking my brains.
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Sep 23, 2016 14:34
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McGlockenshire posted:To: theoilpainter   "With my own eyes I watched Trump get destroyed in that debate, but I wanted him to win so I went straight to the polls and lied my rear end off. And hey a bunch of other people also said he won in that poll so it must be true after all!" The rare posts that give you a first-hand look inside the process of creating one's own reality are the joys that keep me coming back.
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Sep 29, 2016 06:29
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Icon Of Sin posted:Found in the USPol thread: "This seems like an obvious con, but God can do anything, couldn't he also use a conman to bring the Kingdom of Heaven here on earth?" This thread makes me want to quit my job and make a living scamming fundies.
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Oct 5, 2016 04:08
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Lord Hydronium posted:The Gay Paradox: Freep thinks everyone they don't like (i.e. almost everyone) is gay, yet they also think that numbers of gay people are overstated and there are very few in the population. Remember there is a Silent Totally-Not-Gay Majority that completely agrees with each freeper's individual opinions on everything, but this majority is so disillusioned by gay RINO pandering and so frightened of the gay agenda's bullying tactics that they're waiting for a real true conservative to run for president before they come out and vote.
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Oct 7, 2016 06:30
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McGlockenshire posted:To: Rocky Mountain Wild Turkey I know, freep, but it's amazing that this guy is 100% convinced that Trump assaulted women, and is lying about it, and that the women will come forward and he does not care. Does not care. Amazing. Also hilarious that he thinks "Trump is a rapist and that's fine, but look Bill is a rapist and that's horrible" is a good strategy. Like, at least Trump's current strategy is "what I said was just words, Bill actually did it".
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Oct 12, 2016 09:16
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DeusExMachinima posted:God is going to commit voter fraud??? Presumably it's not voter fraud if God reaches into your heart like with pharaoh and magically changes your mind before you vote. RagnarokAngel posted:You'd think if all your prayers arent working God may not be backing your horse but eh details. They believe in an rear end in a top hat Old Testament God that puts bad kings in charge and/or sends conquering Babylonian armies if the country isn't groveling before Him enough.
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Oct 19, 2016 05:27
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kartikeya posted:Ivory tower liberal! How dare she know how to speak well! Kiss of Azrael Clr 7, Nec 8 Domains: Death, War, Nationalism, Supply-side Economics Range: Line of Sight Duration: Instantaneous Components: V, S, M The next time the target goes to sleep, she must make a will save (DC 30+2/additional caster) or be disintegrated (body is unrecoverable, only True Resurrection can bring the target back to life). The caster must be able to see the target, either through scrying or a national broadcast of some sort. Focus: a computer with an internet connection and a message board account. The caster must type the words of the spell as he says them and post them to a message board. The target can only be affected by this spell once per day, but every caster that posts this spell in the same thread about the same event adds +2 to the saving throw difficulty.
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Oct 21, 2016 06:35
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Jagged Jim posted:To: Starman417 A guaranteed minimum income that scales with family size would actually be a great idea, but freep will vote against it every time because they want it whites-only and the 14th Amendment says you can't do that. The best thing about this cycle is the Republican base finally coming out and demanding welfare for whites, maybe they'll finally stop nominating big-business assholes who give them nothing and ship their jobs overseas. I want to see an election between two Big Government pro-welfare parties with the only disagreement being who gets it, whites or everyone (demographics says the whites-only party isn't going to be winning these elections)
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Oct 21, 2016 06:50
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Kavak posted:Hillary's either got Death Ward up or some scary Saving Throws. Well what do you think her debate prep was? You didn't think she was really trading questions with Tim Kaine in a Trump wig instead of casting buffs, did you?
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Oct 21, 2016 06:52
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The only unbiased polling would be between 50% people who think Trump won the debate and 50% people who think Hillary won 
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Oct 24, 2016 06:11
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McGlockenshire posted:I will never, ever, at any point understand this mindset. What does it accomplish? If I'm incredibly generous, the most reasonable interpretation is: assuming you believe that media makes up false exit polling results to demoralize Republicans into staying home and thereby turn their fake polls into a self-fulfilling prophecy, then Republicans can defeat this psyop by convincing each other that all their fellow Republicans are avoiding or lying to the pollsters, they will ignore news of disastrous exit polling and go vote anyway. Not only will they defeat the Lügenpresse plot and score an upset victory, they'll discredit the media forever and no one will listen to polls ever again. Realistically though, it's just a security blankey that freep can cling to for a few more hours of denying reality before it all comes crashing down on them at like 9:00pm EST.
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Nov 7, 2016 04:48
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The best Freep event is still purging RINO Romney supporters in the 2012 primaries and then turning around and purging every lingering RINO who wouldn't support Romney in the general along with anyone who asked if formerly purged Romney supporters could now come back. It guaranteed a userbase of nothing but lickspittles and sycophants concerned only with conformity and finding and outing RINO traitors.
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Nov 7, 2016 05:35
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Keyser S0ze posted:One of you brave anti-freeper deep cover operatives need to sneak in there and post a "how old are you?" poll. I'm gonna guess they are not as old as we think they are (40's vs 60's) If you want to know how hold Freepers are search for a Medicare thread. Freepers under 50: "You geezers are lazy moochers stealing my hard work" Freepers 50-55: *slowly dawning realization that no insurance company will take old people at any affordable price* 55+: "I worked hard for my Medicare you keep your government hands off what I got!"
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Nov 23, 2016 05:27
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MattD1zzl3 posted:That one freeper correcting to vote by 3 million votes got me thinking. What actually does stop illegal immigrants from voting? I'm thinking in states without voter ID laws. I'm sure it's a stupid question but Googling doesn't work because the internet is too plugged up with bullshit conspiracy theories You have to be registered to vote. And they record when you vote so the same voter can't vote twice. You can't just walk across the border and into a voting booth no questions asked. I guess 3 million illegals could have murdered 3 million Americans and pretended to be them at the polls but you'd think their families and coworkers would notice and report them missing.
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Nov 23, 2016 15:21
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Twelve by Pies posted:Oh hey, it's the guy who greenlit Iron Man and hires liberals apparently purely so he can fire them every other year. God I wish I had a freep account so I could ask this guy how this works. Why does he hire liberals in the first place? Or does he try to weed them out but they sometimes slip through and later on reveal their liberalness after they feel safe in their job, but then why wait for the election why not fire them the second you find out?
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Dec 5, 2016 05:02
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Marijuana Nihilist posted:hopefully paul ryan succeeds, boomers cant die off soon enough Nah Paul Ryan's plan is just to take it away from everyone under 55, so Gen X and younger can go die, boomers get to pass through old age as they passed through life: pampered recipients of huge payouts from their parents and their children, voting to give themselves more and more and gently caress their kids forever on the way out.
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Dec 5, 2016 05:06
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It reminds me of the documentary about the Wisconsin recall election, where the creators follow some Republican union workers and veterans. One lady is a schoolteacher who just doesn't know what to do (and never does reveal whom she voted for in the recall) because she knows she's absolutely going to get hosed when Walker destroys her union and her benefits but "Republicans are supposed to be for the people, why is this happening I'm not one of the lazy moochers on handouts" and "but if I vote for the Democrat they'll fund abortion". The other is a woman who works in a veteran's hospital, which is also going to be destroyed, and she registers her non-voting Confederate-flag waving husband to vote for the first time: "I can't believe I finally get you to vote and it's for a drat Democrat." At least that couple figures some poo poo out, but it's so so depressing watching people struggle with "but my team is the good guys" versus "I will literally die if my team wins" 
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Dec 6, 2016 04:46
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Haha wow soooooo closequote:To: Sean_Anthony Hardee’s/Carl’s Jr. CEO, who is hated by liberals, will be Trump’s pick for Labor Secretary
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Dec 9, 2016 18:22
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change my name posted:"Oh no, my dad was hit by a car! Guess I'll just tear up my voting card now." Guavanaut posted:Not to mention everyone whose dad died overseas. Why does Freep hate the sons of veterans? Sad! Even better, your dad has to "vouch for your competence", not just exist. Disagree with your dad's politics? No vote for you, ya ungrateful long-haired punk! I love the unintentional reveals of  family dysfunction.
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Jan 20, 2017 08:41
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Medicare is the funniest freep topic because you can see the shift from the 1990s as the boomers who bitched about old people getting free stuff start drawing it, and now they've "earned it" while the Gen X freepers call them mooching socialists. Different topic: I like that it's somehow the Democrats' fault that Republicans don't even have a plan to replace Obamacare. Not even "we proposed a great plan but Democrats filibustered it", just straight-up nah we're too sad to write any bills as long as Democrats exist.
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Feb 7, 2017 03:39
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quote:Personally I worry more that teens and children are losing any sense of innocence because of the constant bombardment telling them that sex is only a matter of consent and protection. It's funny how little effort it takes to get evangelicals to start talking about their right to child brides. Actually it's probably where a lot of this "transwomen are just men who want to get into your bathrooms to rape little girls" comes from, that's the first thing they would do if they found themselves in the girls' room.
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Feb 22, 2017 06:10
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SocketWrench posted:I love the fact they're all "You're ruining childhood innocence with sex" when they're the ones that elected a tangerine that treats women like sex objects and are always bitching about teh gays and their buttsex...some in extreme detail. A child's innocence should only be ruined with sex the way God intended: after a judge inspects her genitals and determines she's nubile enough to marry a twice-divorced 55-year-old man -
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Feb 23, 2017 06:14
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I'm glad they've already preemptively created an Obama shadow government to blame for every Trump fuckup, now that's planning ahead!
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Feb 24, 2017 01:26
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Mustached Demon posted:Freepers: I have been slur’d as homo, islamo, transo and gynoslurs Welcome to the Left Coast, homos and gynos! Special shout-out to our islamo guests tonight. Where are my transos in the house!
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Feb 27, 2017 08:23
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 I thought I was too jaded, but you've still got it freep.
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Mar 3, 2017 14:14
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 They're just now figuring out that the 40-plus go-nowhere repeal bills were just for show and the super secret plan to replace Obamacare (that we can't tell you about because Dems will steal it (and this would be bad somehow  )) never existed.
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Mar 8, 2017 03:20
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 Back in my day gays were accepted and got to have their gay sex in secret, and nobody bothered them as long as nobody found out. But if they gently caress up and we find out, boom molotov cocktail through their window, it's only right. But we almost never found out so no problem. And everyone was happy about it, especially gay people who were better off at the time. But then liberals encouraged 'em to come out and created this big problem for gays and now they won't stay in the closet and we have to gay bash 'em. As usual liberals hurting the people they claim to be helping.
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Mar 9, 2017 06:40
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Yeah it's just funny, both those posts leave out what happened to trans people who didn't pass well enough and got found out. They got murdered! But now we have to check everyone's crotch and kill them all, thanks liberals!
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Mar 9, 2017 06:51
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MeLKoR posted:A 6-year-olds should not be tormented with the fear of homelessness. *cuts food, medical care, and housing for poor children* And hey can we talk about how Ayn Rand's spirit is still on earth possessing people and posting on freep? Ayn Rand posted:I quite agree with the speaker's indignation. I think it's a monstrous thing — the whole progression of everything they're doing — to feature, or answer, or favor the incompetent, the retarded, the handicapped, including, you know, the kneeling buses and all kinds of impossible expenses. I do not think that the retarded should be ~allowed~ to come ~near~ children. Children cannot deal, and should not have to deal, with the very tragic spectacle of a handicapped human being. When they grow up, they may give it some attention, if they're interested, but it should never be presented to them in childhood, and certainly not as an example of something ~they~ have to live down to.
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Mar 14, 2017 04:03
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I love it when freep openly hates on the
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Mar 16, 2017 09:11
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MANime in the sheets posted:You mean THE EXEMPT Speaker of the uniparty? 
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Mar 17, 2017 08:56
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I mean yeah it has no chance obviously but a dem did introduce it.
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Mar 17, 2017 09:09
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Everyone who saw it says there was no gay kiss, it must have happened so fast that most people didn't notice, that's how Hollywood programs you to be gay you know.
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Mar 20, 2017 02:13
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Keeshhound posted:What I keep having trouble with is this idea freep keeps bouncing around that the GOP is in league with democrats. Like, how does that benefit them? What does Paul Ryan get out of "pretending" to be a Randian, but in secret kneeling to Lord Soros, the true sith puppetmaster of the US government? If conservatism weren't always full of traitors sabotaging conservatism, then we'd have to consider that any of the failures we see might possibly indicate some problems with conservatism itself, and we can't have that.
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Mar 27, 2017 03:03
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McGlockenshire posted:To: GuavaCheesePuff  His uncle's brother...isn't that, just his other uncle? And the daughter would be his cousin. "So I went over to my mom's brother's sister's daughter's aunt's grandmother's son's grandson's house the other day..."
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Mar 27, 2017 05:10
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SocketWrench posted:This has to be a poe. He's accusing Trump supporters of buying into a cult of personality. TapTheForwardAssist posted:Is there an implied grabbing of one's own crotch with this rebuttal? I think that gesture is implied in every freep fantasy of how real American politicians should act: for example while negotiating treaties, or building military coalitions, or commemorating the dead at Hiroshima.
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Mar 29, 2017 06:32
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Jagged Jim posted:Mark Meadows says Freedom Caucus will go along with AHCA if it kills community rating and EHB regs This seems like a good move from the Freedom Caucus, because they know there is absolutely no way a bill killing community rating will ever ever pass the House, let alone the Senate because that would immediately financially destroy millions of rural 40-64 year old voters who went for Trump and the Republicans on a dumb gamble that Trump would bring down their health care costs. If Paul Ryan agrees then the moderates will kill the bill and take the heat of failing to repeal Obamacare off the HFC. On the other hand, the HFC come from gerrymandered blood-red districts full of idiot tea partiers so it seems like voting for any replacement no matter how evil could still open them up to a primary challenge from the right for voting for "Obamacare 3.0" because some subsidy still exists in some form.
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Apr 3, 2017 05:01
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Georgia Peach posted:The one that crashed in Pennsylvania that was reportedly headed to either the White House or the Capitol, I'm guessing. Jesus Christ, I didn't think freep could still shock me
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Apr 3, 2017 09:47
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McGlockenshire posted:To: caww I love how he's very careful to stipulate that none of Obama's airstrikes met this arbitrary threshold for "war" so it was okay to squabble and attack the commander-in-chief then, and he didn't deserve to be shipped off to a death camp for criticizing the president oh no. But now Trump bombed this guy, not those other guys, so fill the gulags with crimethinkers!
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Apr 7, 2017 07:04
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