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May 20, 2024 12:04
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- Radical and BADical!
- Jun 27, 2010
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by Lowtax
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Fun Shoe
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Fucker should have put that in the story instead of dodging comments asking about their baby.
It also reeks of "putting myself in the best light possible now that I'm getting slammed by the comments" retconning. Honestly, why would you not mention a brand new baby in that story? It's a loving huge factor.
He's definitely getting ripped apart for that...honestly yeah reddit it was all made up anyway by some stupid redpiller, who are we even kidding here
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Dec 28, 2016 21:36
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- Radical and BADical!
- Jun 27, 2010
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by Lowtax
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Fun Shoe
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It was a love between two cousins that the world thought was wrong, but it was the world that was wrong...
Les Cousins Dangereux
ha, it was a 'relative' masterpiece of complex eroticism
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Dec 28, 2016 22:48
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- Radical and BADical!
- Jun 27, 2010
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by Lowtax
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Fun Shoe
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A deeply religious Catholic who is into underage sex? Ya don't say...
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Dec 31, 2016 01:44
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- Radical and BADical!
- Jun 27, 2010
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by Lowtax
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Fun Shoe
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Secret word was toenails.
My HORRIBLE roommate (22F) thinks I (22F) am the problem. Should I break the lease and ditch her?
quote:My boyfriend (22M) and I have been together for 4 years. His best friend Billy (21M) started dating Whitney (the 22F roommate) about 2 years ago. She has always been very sweet, organized, they were both student athletes, live healthy lifestyles, clean (or so I thought...). She was a coworker of mine at the restaurant where I was working, as well, so she was reliably employed.
Whitney was living with her mother (43F) and her mother's boyfriend for a few months, when her mother unexpectedly died in January. Whitney did not want to remain living with her mother's "creepy" boyfriend. She has few friends locally, and did not know where to go.
I was, at the time, living very happily and comfortably with my parents and working as a waitress in my final semester of college. Seeing Whitney dealing with the death of her mom, and struggling to find a place to live, sleeping on couches in various peoples' apartments until she was asked to move on... I had to help her. So I evaluated my finances, and determined I would be able to move into a 2-bedroom apartment with her. I approached her, and she cried, she was so touched and thankful that I was going to help her, and so we moved in as best friends.
Fast forward a few months... and I can't get on to our apartment wifi. I try and try, can't figure it out, and finally log in to the website only to find that the bill has not been paid. I wrote her a check 3 weeks ago, and it was deposited into her account... (The PGE and wifi are in her name, since she had lived on her own before and had previous accounts established.) So why wasn't the bill paid? I ask her about it and she snaps at me, and says she's waiting for her paycheck. It finally gets paid. The next month, knowing she was stressed, I just paid the late fees and reactivation fees without a word.
It happens again a month later. The internet is turned off, and we are charged extra fees. I remind her repeatedly to pay it and am ignored. Now it is summer, and our electricity rates are climbing. (We live in an area that its 115 fahrenheit during the day). Our bills went from $50 to $87 to $160 over three months, and continue to climb.
She texted me that our new electricity bill was $380. Confused as gently caress, I logged in to PGE by guessing her password, and found: Our power bill was only paid on time the first month of use. She has collected money from me every month for the power bill, but has only been paying it every other month. So... the unpaid balance rolls over, and she gives me that amount as the new balance, and I cut her a check without question. (For example, I write her a $40 check for an $80 electricity bill. She doesn't pay it. The next month, our new charges are $100, making the bill $180. She tells me it's $180. I write her a check for $90.) So she's been making a lot of money off me. Also, we've apparently been notified 3 times that our power will be turned off in 15 days, if no payment is received.
Internet bill is once again due, this time free of late charges. I write her a check 2 weeks in advance, she deposits it.
She is gone to Disneyland for 5 days with a wedding party she is a part of. The due date comes and goes. I remind her via text the day of, 3 days after, and then again at 8 days overdue. She tells me if I want to be in control of everything, she can just take the wifi out of the front room and I can start over all on my own. "Everything is in my name, so none of this effects you at all. I'm waiting to get paid today. I deal with way more poo poo than you do. It'll get paid." I take the high road, choose not to call her out on all the things I know just yet and say, "okay good."
She eats out almost every night at teppan yaki and expensive restaurants, goes on vacations, and buys Billy clothes and food and protein, since he doesn't work. She has money... just not for bills, I guess.
I haven't yet mentioned the state of the home we are living in. I have found molding birthday cakes under her bed. Melted cream cheese in the carpet. She pops her boyfriend's back pimples and wipes it on the furniture. He peels his sunburns and shreds them into the carpet. She cleans out under his toenails and wipes the black whatever-the-gently caress into the couch, stating "smells like rotting flesh!"
Take out, bowls of food and sodas will sit for WEEKS until they are moldy, crusty, stinking... and I clean them up. The kitchen is small, and any mess makes it impossible to cook or get water or do anything. She will cook at 1am, sleep until 3pm, and go to work, and her dishes will sit for days and days. So I clean up after her, and her boyfriend. Writing this now, I feel like a push over. But she has been so depressed, I've just wanted to help her in any way I can. I can't even imagine losing my mom.
Most recently, she had been gone for a week or so, I hadn't heard anything, and had been noticing that her cat was scratching a lot. I couldn't find his flea collar, so I went and bought some flea ointment, and applied it to my cat and hers. My cat was fine, but hers seemed upset and stressed over it, panting, and running all over. Thinking he might be allergic, I removed the ointment, washed the area with gentle soap and water, and put hydrocortisone on his skin. He calmed right down and fell asleep. I texted her the following day to let her know of his allergy, just so she wouldn't by that brand of flea medicine again. She showed up at the house screaming for her cat, asking me where he was, and she couldn't believe I'd given her cat "a medical treatment" without her knowledge, and that he was probably laying somewhere in the house traumatized.
She isn't paying bills, she's stealing from me, she's dirty, unhygienic, a huge bitch. I've basically been her personal maid for the past 7 months, gone above and beyond to keep the peace and help her get through this time in her life, and she hates me.
I hate to move out and leave her without a roommate when she isn't making our bills as it is. I know it's the last thing she needs when she's still handling her mom's estate and her younger siblings really scary reactions to the tragedy. Her younger sister (16) has taken meth twice now, and her brother (17) will disappear for days and days. But I can't live like this. Even Billy who has been best friends with my boyfriend since 6 years old, is being cold towards him now, as a result of my and his girlfriends' tension. I honestly can't imagine what she could be saying to turn him against me and my boyfriend. As far as I can tell, I haven't done anything awful.  I'm just depressed about the whole thing and know that no friendship will remain when this is over.
Is it time for me to move, cut off the friendship and leave her in the lurch with more stress and problems? Or should I keep trying to be a good friend and wait out this period of her life with her?
tl;dr: Roommate doesn't pay bills, is stealing from me, and is very dirty and rude to me. I think it might be due to depression, as she just lost her mother. Should I wait it out as a good friend, or cut my losses and move?
I shook my Magic 8 Ball and signs point to 
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Apr 8, 2017 15:21
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- Radical and BADical!
- Jun 27, 2010
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by Lowtax
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Fun Shoe
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Secret phrase was action figure
Me [24F] with my ex [27M] of 4 years ago, I think he broke into my apartment and set up a camera. Am I being crazy?
quote:I (24F) met my ex (27M) 7 years ago and we dated for about 1 year and I ended up pregnant. He is a Jehovah's Witness and I was raised in this but was never baptized (thankfully). When I ended up pregnant I was told that I had to marry him if I wanted to be in good standing at the Kingdom Hall (church). I agreed and decided not to listen to my parents when they begged me to take my time and make that decision later. Of course this meant staying and living with my parents and as a brainwashed 18 yr old I thought he was the best thing that's ever happened to me and he couldn't do me wrong because he was a Jehovah's Witness and they can't do no wrong ... Boy was I wrong.
While pregnant he would emotionally and physically abuse me. To the point where my son was pre mature and I fell into postpartum depression. When my son was 8 months old I decided I had enough and I needed to put my feelings and "love" I had for this man aside and make the right decision for my son. I left him. I left the religion. I don't know how I did it but to this day I thank my son for giving me the strength and love to get past it.
Fast forward about 5 years ... I am doing great!! I have an amazing career. Great car. I live on my own with my son. We have everything we need. I recently began my first relationship and he's amazing.
My ex and I actually have a pretty cordial co parenting relationship. He seems to have matured a lot and is now in a relationship. I get along great with his gf and my son likes her. He recently decided to move 2 doors next to my place. I didn't really mind this as we don't fight or hate each other. I actually saw this as a good thing since he will be closer to our son and can be more involved in school.
Last week I walk into my apartment and someone had broken in. But they didn't take anything at all. A few stuff were moved around... Seemed like they were looking for something and gave up. The first thing that popped in my head was my sons father. I have been living here for years and never had any issues. I actually live in front of the police station so unless you go in through the back they would see everything. I filed a police report and left it at that.
Now this is where it gets weird and my suspicion is proving itself to be right.. I dropped off my son at his house 3 days ago and he mentioned how I shouldn't allow our son to have certain toys because they are "violent" action figures (power rangers). There is no way he would know this. Since he is a JW I don't like disrespecting his beliefs so I make sure that my son does not bring those toys to his house. When I asked him how he knew about it he turned pale. He didn't know what to say and finally said that my son mentioned it. Ok so maybe my son could've told him ... But maybe he didn't..
To add to my suspicion 2 days ago I dropped my son off in the AM and he slipped and told me that I need to shower my son everyday because last night I didn't. There is NO way my son could've told him. He didn't speak to him and it was literally the morning after. Also I shower my son everyday but he had swim class and we got home late so I figured he was okay to skip ( I know sounds lazy but I'm sure we've all had those days). Am I being paranoid? I hate feeling like I don't have privacy in my own home. Should I ask him? Is there a way I can check myself? I've tried looking but nothing I see that shows me there could be a camera.
tl;dr: Someone broke into my house 2 weeks after my ex moved in next door. I think he put a camera in my home to see how I am living with my son.
So, were her suspicions unfounded? Lol, gently caress no.
I was encouraged to come here to share my story about my ex and a hidden camera I found.
(This was posted to an ex-LDS sub)
quote:I have been lurking in the sub for the past week and I am so happy I found this! I really wish I would have known about this years ago when I left the congregation. It would have made the pain less and the loneliness not as bad. When I left the organization I had no friends and no encouragement that I almost convinced myself multiple times to go back but I was able to get through it.
I wanted to share my story with you but before I'll give a little background on my past. I pretty much grew up as a witness and I never got baptized. I met my sons father when I was about 18 and I ended up pregnant a couple months after that. The elders pretty much forced marriage on me. As soon as we moved in together he was abusive. It was horrible. He would physically abuse me knowing I was pregnant with his son. It got so bad that I would literally urinate myself because of how scared I was of him. The last time he laid his hands on me was when I Was 6 1/2 months pregnant. i remember he barged into the bathroom since he knew I was calling the cops and when he opened the door he hit my belly and I went straight into the tub.
They had to perform an emergency c section. When I was under anesthesia he even signed a paper stating I would be refusing blood transfusion and since he was my husband it was his decision to make. Thankfully I had great doctors and my son and I were healthy and made it through. I remember the elders coming to visit me when I was still in the hospital. I remember them telling me that I needed to work harder in putting jehovah first in our marriage because without him our marriage would fail. A few months later I left him and I left the organization. I went to therapy for my postpartum depression and I was able to physiologically block those memories even though sometimes certain things trigger it and it all comes back. It's insane how the mind works.
I have a great relationship with my parents. They never shunned me and they always always look after my son and I. I know they are brainwashed but I know deep down my father knows I made the right decision. And after all this mess I think he's opening his eyes a little.
The link below is my 1st post and then below I copied and pasted my update. I don't know why they locked my post. I was at work and when I checked it was automatically locked. I did receive some good advice on there but it's different when it comes from people who know what you grew up in and know just how much mind control plays a big role on everything when it comes to Jw. I also would like some advice on how to handle these elders. They keep calling my parents and begging them to reason with me. I am assuming this is really going to reflect them in a bad light and we all know how much they hate that. Also please keep in mind that my parents (although witnesses) have my best interest in mind. My father sat me down and told me no matter what he will stand by my decision and he will fully support me going through with these charges. I just wish that they didn't have to receive all this harassment.
Original post :
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/3pg07a/me_24f_with_my_ex_27m_of_4_years_ago_i_think_he/?ref=share&ref_source=link
UPDATE
First and foremost thank you for all your suggestions and messages on what steps I should take. So much has happened these past 7 days and my life is just turned upside down completely. I will try to explain without making it too long. I will start by last week (Wednesday).. after reading all the comments I decided to purchase a 'spy finder' off amazon. I figured it would put my mind at ease and I can finally feel comfortable in my own home. I paid for 2 day delivery and planned out what I would do so that I can use this without being obvious. Since I knew that the only way I can do this was by having my sons father in front of me so I decided to tell him I needed to speak with him regarding a new schedule I would like to follow.
Friday- We decided to meet up for ice cream with our son. I gave my BF a spare key so he can go in and see if the spy detector worked. I want to say that our meeting lasted about 40 mins until I finally got the 'ok' from my BF and I wrapped up the conversation. When I got into my car I called my BF and all he told me that I needed to drop my son off at my moms and head over to my place. I did exactly as he said. When I arrived to my place I parked and my BF comes inside my car and breaks the news to me.. he told me that the detectors detected something but it was not clear. It kept showing red in my sons room around the doorknob but it also showed red on one side of a wall that didn't have anything hanging near it. At this point I didn't know what to do or say. Maybe this was just a malfunction and there is nothing there.. or maybe there is. I decided that I needed to call the cops. I didn't know if it was going to be the right call but its showing signal in my sons room and that was enough for me to make that call even if I sounded "silly" to the cops.
Once the cops showed up I explained to him the situation (he usually works the morning shift surveillance in my sons school so i see him every morning). He was very understanding and told me he was calling in a tech that would have the equipment as not all cops carry it. At this point I still did not tell the cops that I thought maybe it was my sons father, I figured once it was confirmed I would let out that part. 10 mins later... my sons dad walks up my driveway and asks if I am okay. I say yes and that's when the cop walks up (I think he saw how uncomfortable I was) and tells him only the residents are allowed to be there. He goes to tell the cop that he is my sons father and the cop starts asking him if he is from the area. As soon as he tells him he recently moved 2 houses down the cop asked him to leave since he was not a resident. Once off the property the cop starts asking me more questions about my sons father and that's when I went into full blown detail. After the conversation he tells me its a high chance that he could have placed a camera in my sons room.
Once the tech arrived he scanned the room and at this point we were told to still wait outside. About 30 mins later he asks me to come in and for my BF to stay behind. He proceeds to tell me that there was a camera in my sons room. They found a tiny camera in the door knob. Not sure if you are familiar with this but my doorknobs lock from the inside but on the opposite side there is a little hole where you usually need a flat head screw driver or a similar looking key to open it ( I will take a picture later on to show). He explained to me whoever put in this camera replaced the doorknobs with 2 of the same knobs (meaning that the door no longer has a lock). I NEVER realized this. It was such a small detail that I never realized. I never lock my sons room so this was not something I would look into. I broke down. I didn't know what to say or what to think. He told me that it was linking through Bluetooth/wifi.
Unfortunately the camera signal was cut and he was working on getting some code to see where the signal was coming from. Once they confirmed this I was given the address and of course it ended up coming from my ex's address. Not the exact address but more coordination points (no idea what they refer it to they just told me it's a System they use to track a signal)
I was in complete shock. I think part of me thought he would never do this. He would never violate my privacy and our sons privacy by doing this. I thought we were passed this stage. After they broke the news to me they told me I can press charges if I would like. If this is what I decided to do they would have to process a warrant for his arrest. It was the hardest decision I had to make but I told them yes. They explained to me that the best thing for me to do was to stay at a relatives or friends house until this was resolved as it can be dangerous for me to be so close to him. I don't understand why they couldn't take him then and there but I told them I would pack a bag.
I decided to stay at my parents home. It was near my job and it was a place my son was comfortable staying in. I did not hear from my ex at all Saturday. I know I mentioned in my previous post that my parents/ex are Jehovah's Witness .. which plays a big part in this whole story.
Sunday night my parents had plans and I stayed behind with my son. I hear a knock on the door. I look and to my surprise it is 2 elders (I guess you can call them pastors to those not familiar with the terms). These were the same men that would tell me not to call the cops when my ex would get physical. These are also the same men that watched me grow up since I was 3. I decided to open the door and they asked to come in (my brother was in the other room so I felt a little more at ease speaking with them). As soon as they start taking the bible out I tell them I do not feel comfortable with that and if they have anything to say it will be through a conversation and not through the bible.
They agreed and started explaining to me the consequences my ex is facing in the kingdom hall for what he has done. They also told me that my ex was taken down to the station Sunday morning but that he 'confessed' to them everything on Saturday. To make it short they begged me to drop the charges and kept telling me to think about my son. To think about how he would feel knowing his dad is facing these charges. They kept saying over and over that Jehovah does not condemn his behavior and sometimes the organization can work this out within themselves. I told them I would not drop the charges. What he did was violate my privacy and that I was happy that they would work it out between their religion but I would work out my end through the law. They proceeded to tell me that they have lawyers that can back up my ex and that if this is the route I take I should make sure I am covered as well. They also said the reason he put a camera is because he wants custody of my son, because its not fair to him to not have eternal life and my ex can save my son. Crazy right?
I don't know what he was trying to find by putting a camera in my sons room because I have absolutely nothing to hide and my son is very well taken care of. I asked them to leave and they did. When I told my dad about what happened and what they were saying to me he called one of the elders and pretty much went off on him. I hope it doesn't ruin his rep since I know this religion means the world to him but at the same time I also hope maybe this will open his eyes.
This is all such a nightmare to me. I don't know what to do. Deep down I do not want to press charges because he is my sons father. I don't want this to ruin his record or for my son to grow up and find out I placed his dad in jail over this. I also know what its like to be brainwashed and be under mind control. The other part of me feels like he needs to learn his lesson. He needs to know that you can't simply violate someones privacy because of your religion. I am not sure what is or will be happening yet. Last I heard he was out on a bail and will have a court date which I will need to appear to as well. At that time I can decide to drop the charges if i wanted to. I also received a court date from the Family Court and he is going for full custody. He filed about a month ago so this is something he has been planning. I am hoping this whole thing will work for my benefit which is another reason why I should not drop the charges as it will help me in family court.
So for now that's all that has happened. I don't know what steps to take from here and I am sort of taking it day by day. I have found a new place and after talking to my landlord he is letting me break the lease. I hate that I have to move. I love my apartment and I will be moving to a much smaller place for more $.. I wish I didn't have to move but there is not much else I can do. Radical and BADical! fucked around with this message at 16:13 on Apr 8, 2017
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Apr 8, 2017 15:47
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- Radical and BADical!
- Jun 27, 2010
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by Lowtax
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Fun Shoe
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You should bold some of the important parts
honestly I meant to but I am loving high
drat, secret phrase action figure takes you to some dark places, more forthcoming
edit: I tried to go through and just bold the interesting parts but the whole thing is chock full of 
I [44 M] called the cops for the first time tonight on my abusive wife of 21 years. I'm scared.
quote:I can expand later as I'm typing on my phone, laying here in bed next to my sleeping kids.
In short, my wife has been incredibly mentally and emotionally cruel to me[/b] since t s to escape early on, but she was so manipulative and hurtful that I always eventually gave in. Sometimes she'd physically block the door, other times she'd lie on the ground clinging to my ankle. She'd alternate between threats, put-downs, and guilt, until I gave up.
She has been a little physically abusive (kicking, minor shoving, throwing a glass of water in my face) and extremely emotionally abusive, everything from guilt tripping me about having friends, visiting family (I'm isolated here where we live), having hobbies or interests, looking nice, to cheating on me with one of my best friends, and telling me I'm not a man, that she has no respect for me, and no respect for my career, etc.
She also has systematically undermined my friendships and career, sometimes guilt tripping me for going to work and yelling at me for literally hours until I not only miss work, but give up on life, on ever fighting for anything, on having any hope of escape, and of keeping the job. Another way is by disappearing when I need to go to work, so that I'm stuck home with the kids.
I let myself get cowed into submission and a marriage I didn't want, but she was so cruel and so threatening ("you stole the best years of my life. I'm going to tell your mom how horrible you were to me.") that I gave in and told myself she was a sweet person who is suffering from childhood abuse and that I could do a lot worse.
She's undermined or just plain prevented me from maintaining my small company (demanding to borrow significant amounts of money from it and then breaking her word about paying it back; literally preventing me from going to work by disappearing or taking my keys; and a constant barrage of tearing down my self esteem, including telling me she expects me to fail, that I'm a piece of poo poo, that she doesn't respect me or my career), so it went under. For the past year and a half I've just stayed home and cared for the kids while she is away for hours every day pursuing her interests (she works three 12 hour shifts at night).
She has control of the bank account (took my ATM card) and I'm not allowed to have any money unless I ask for it.
She also takes some of my mail and has gotten me in trouble by it. For example, a couple years ago I got a very minor ticket while driving, and she took the letter that showed up, and didn't tell me. It went to a Failure To Appear and then a warrant for my arrest and my license was suspended. When I found out, I asked why she had taken my mail and was told "I didn't want you to flake on it." The fees were almost $2,000, and she told me I wasn't allowed to pay it out of our money; it had to come out of my business.
Yesterday for the second time in a month she shoved and hit me while I was holding our 4 year old. We weren't having an argument over anything really, I just was saying "Let me talk. I listened to you so let me talk. Stop shouting over me; I'm not shouting."
This time there were cuts and a little bleeding from her nails, and at the advice of my father who is a divorce attorney, I took one of the scariest and biggest plunges of my life - I felt like throwing up - and put the kids at our neighbors', and went and filed a police report. I was told it was felony assault or felony domestic violence, I can't remember the term. The law required them to arrest her, so I went to the neighbors' and stayed with the kids until the sheriff called me and said it was done.
The bail is going to be around $50,000 so the only way she can get out is to spend $5,000 on a bail bond. We don't have an extra $500 so it will have to be her parents somehow taking out a loan and getting her out.
If her family doesn't come up with the money, she will lose her job due to missing work. This terrifies me as we have NO money, like maybe a hundred spare dollars, and I can't instantly get a job (or start another company) which allows me to make enough money to make ends meet.
I also need several thousand dollars for the divorce attorney and don't have it. I think I
can come up with it by selling some stock my grandparents gave to me when I was born. Bummer, but poo poo happens.
I'm isolated from my family, who aren't exactly the most nurturing people in the world (why do you think I failed to escape this abuse in the first place, or since then?) and friends, and haven't been permitted to have friends nearby who I can see and hang out with, and develop friendships with.
I'm scared that the kids are going to be hurt by this big ordeal that has just begun. I don't have much of a support system, especially my family. I''m so emotionally and mentally beaten down and my optimism and ideas of self efficacy or my own abilities are so ground down that I'm finding it hard to believe in myself. I'm scared that what she said is true and that I really CAN'T provide for myself or my family (even though I know I used to) and that I do suck and really am not a man.
I don't have a question. I'm just hoping for some support or useful ideas.
Please don't tell me what a supposedly bad person or piece of poo poo she is. I don't need or want emotion or anger. What I could really use is some calm perspective and practical advice.
Thanks for reading.
tl;dr: Finally called the cops on abusive wife who's now in jail. Unemployed and terrified things are going to be a giant painful explosion for everyone.
Here's the update if anyone is interested. It's extremely whiny (so much so that I began to see the wife's point of view) but it does at least resolve the whole thing.
Radical and BADical! fucked around with this message at 16:29 on Apr 8, 2017
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Apr 8, 2017 16:16
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 20, 2024 12:04
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- Radical and BADical!
- Jun 27, 2010
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by Lowtax
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Fun Shoe
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You're naming it Pnurtis, right?
seriously, if you don't nickname that kid Pnurtis I'm calling CPS
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Apr 10, 2017 16:20
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Nov 30, 2016 21:54
