WampaLord posted:

This one is dedicated to anyone who has ever said "Eat the booty like groceries"

Me [27M] with my 25 [F] Have a question. My girlfriend has started requesting that I eat her rear end everynight, even if we don't have sex, or she will not be able to go to sleep.

Bubblyblubber posted:

Isn't it kind of the point of sugar daddy deals to pay a lot of money for little actual contact /loving? Like those guys that pay women to laugh at their tiny dicks?

Thought the title was just being hyperbolic, but nah

Blowjobs are destroying my relationship. [24F] [25M]

A Fancy Hat posted:

I was in an abusive relationship with someone like this and reading this freaked me out like a 'Nam flashback.

It was exactly the same thing, she'd devote hours and sometimes even DAYS to arguing with people in order to get miniscule fees removed or get coupons honored. She'd constantly try to get things for free by arguing that service at restaurants was bad, or that waiters didn't mention some special of the day so we should get free food since we didn't know all the options.

She'd call every bill company she had, argue with them for hours that she was going to cancel the card/utility/cable/whatever and then get $5 or whatever removed off the bill or get a free week of the movie channels. She'd do that every single month and argue that it was a good use of her time.

She got herself banned from multiple restaurants and bars for constantly belittling the staff, and our local internet company even banned her because she "had demands that couldn't be met by the company".

When that poo poo turned on me it was terrifying. I used pizza sauce instead of pasta sauce for dinner one night and she mentioned it to me for months as "a big screw up". She got physically violent at one point and that was when I finally wised up and got out. Hopefully this dude ends things before it gets to that level.

Outrail posted:

Every time I think I'm being really stupid I think about this thread and feel really clever.

Day Man posted:

Can we go back to: Why are community service people working on factory farms? Aren't they supposed to be working on publicly owned things like roads? Why are they providing companies with free labor?

ArbitraryC posted:

I mean it's weird (and probably intentionally inflammatory of them) to discuss that sort of thing as casual dinner conversation but opening with " She lives in a European country that has a 500 year history of kicking out or murdering Jews living in the country." is pretty lol.

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

what is the correct point of engagement for the view "gay people should all be put to death", in your opinion

Krazyface posted:

Supposedly this was a thing between the Romans and the Gauls, that the barbarians just couldn't handle their wine.

LOVE LOVE SKELETON posted:

but guys, come on! he SHITS! in a BAG!

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

I'm still confused on how an 18 year old girl and a 14 year old guy became close friends and later started dating at 16 and 20. Ignoring the questionable morality of the scenario, how does that even happen? Some weird Mormon church thing?

Jack-Off Lantern posted:

https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/7o27ef/fiance_of_10_years_slept_with_uncle_for_drugs/

Barudak posted:

When my father visited my mothers family for the first time, he went into the freezer to grab somethinf only to find a dead parrot. It was so old that my mother and my aunt never owned a parrot growing up.

girl pants posted:

"You're a nice girl but I think we should see other peo--" *sound of a rope frantically being sawed at* "Why did I do this at Yosemite"

Me[27M] goes to the climbing gym with my friend[28F], and my of four months GF[25F] can't stand it.


According to r/r there are a LOT of girlfriends who are apparently insecure about their boyfriends' climbing partners.

abigserve posted:

If this is a real post you have a mental illness

I used to retch at the thought of eating fish. My mother tried making it a million different ways but I would always dry heave when even trying to eat it. I remember once in particular I literally nearly threw up everywhere

Then one day when I was much older I went with my friends to a seafood restaurant, drunk, and started smashing down some battered flathead or whatever it was. Suddenly, magically, my gag reflex for fish had disappeared forever and now I love the stuff

My picky eating was solved by not being a huge pussy so maybe you should try that or see a doctor because it's no way to live life

Palpek posted:

coronatae posted:

The post I found wasn’t exactly as I remembered it but I knew the phrase “Satan shitplane” was involved so here it is:

Girlfriend [24/f] masturbates to the same thing I do to get back at me [26/m]?


[UPDATE] Girlfriend [24/f] masturbates to the same thing I do to get back at me [26/m]?


And the conclusion...

Long-awaited update about this psycho b who masturbated to my porn to prove some twisted point

Jeza posted:

when your girl starts to cry at your gross stimuli, that's a-voré

LadyPictureShow posted:

Feeling trapped and isolated by my “to be” in laws


And you want to marry into this familywhy?!

Clearly the answer is make sure your home has fire insurance, take your dog out and burn the house to the ground. Ka-ching!

Ratjaculation posted:

It cant be

chitoryu12 posted:

My [24M] girlfriend [22F] just moved in and she's been sleep-talking about murder. Should I be worried?

Barudak posted:

I had to do a family ancestry project for school. Turns out we were molded from the clay by Zeus himself in 1945 which made my project a real cinch to complete.

Barudak posted:

Dude is ready to be writer of comedies because he has now learned in the most embarassing way possible that three is the smallest group possible in which there can be an outsider.

Smirking_Serpent posted:

My (27m) best friend and best man (28m) has vowed he's going to say "one ring to rule them all!" when presenting the rings at the alter. My fiancé (26f) has forbidden it. He's going to do it anyways. What do I do?

Ham Sandwiches posted:

I really enjoyed the dead relative charm story, it's so wonderful

"I know you've made plans to gently caress someone else today... but I'll cast a spell on you!"

*holds up charm, a bright light fills the room*

hahahaha for gently caress's sake

Like this dude genuinely sat down and made a list

Step 1. Show charm
Step 2. This will bring up memories of dead relative
Step 3. Using the transitive formula from Algebra 2 we can determine that this will lead to memories of being in love
Step 4. At that point she'll cancel her date with Chad who is T minus 5 minutes to come over and gently caress her
Step 5. We go back to being in love

"No reason it shouldn't work let's give it a shot" *holds up charm like He Man busting out sword*

Absurd Alhazred posted:

Okay? Anyway, I'm saying that's not where I think it was coming from, considering the women I've dated here.

Anyway, this is getting kind of weird.

My [32m] girlfriend [34f] has a unique way of coping with situations and its driving us apart


Convince her to go to a real therapist?

Martha Stewart Undying posted:

this is some bizarre modern day morality play

DominoKitten posted:

Our newborn is three weeks old and my (24/F) Fiance (27/M) admitted he won't stop cheating on me


...well that's a new one.

Palpek posted:

My [37F] husband's [39M] "long lost daughter" [22F] has ruined my life.

Dienes posted:

This is no different from the guys that freak out that a vibrating dildo is a threat to them in some way. Lady, relax. Maybe you need a toy yourself.

The toy in question, in the most tasteful picture I've seen for a jerk off toy ever (NSFW, obv): https://i.imgur.com/Y8858VC.png

dudeness posted:

It seems misleading to call is "realistic" when it has 10 vibrating functions, the average woman must have 2 or 3 vibrating functions max.

Haifisch posted:

My [23M] gf [25F] has a disgusting fetish, and I don't know if I can handle it. (self.relationship_advice)

Carbon Thief posted:

My girlfriend [29F] introduced me to her son [13M] and I don't know if I want to parent him


(update!) My girlfriend [29F] introduced me to her son [13M] and I don't know if I want to parent him

Pick posted:

Dude that would be too many fricking tomatoes dude

Gorilla Salad posted:

The Japan thread once had some idiots tell how they went to Japan to illegally work on farms for no pay (and no legal protections).

Yep, backbreaking labour all day for a bowl of rice and a hardwood floor to sleep on, surrounded by other unwashed idiots.

Those farmers must have been laughing till they puked.

Pick posted:

LMAO your brother will get nothing

Caganer posted:

My GF[24] wants to have sex with a co-worker. I’m M[28] been dating for 2.5 years


sex positivity has come so far redditors are not sure if they are being unreasonable when they feel they don't want their partners to gently caress people from the office