ZearothK posted:

I had a nightmare last night about one of the stories from this thread I read yesterday.

It was the one about having a roommate who cleaned their poo poo in the shower. That woke me right up.

Pick posted:

Being hated by goons is not really a bad sign

quote:

My gf and I have been dating for about a month and the first three weeks went smoothly, but this week, I've accidentally grazed her boob three times and it needs to stop.

The first time, I wanted to hold hands and her hands were crossed. I went for her hand and grazed her boob in the process.

The second time, I was trying to adjust a blanket that was laying on both our laps and, again, I grazed her boob

The third time, I was caressing her arm on the bicep side and went a bit too high without realizing, grazing her boob once more.

Every time, I've apologized extensively and she believes me when I say they were mistakes. I know all of those were preventable and I still beat myself up for still doing them. She tells me I shouldn't beat myself up, but it still hurts me that I hurt her like that. She has pretty big boobs and we do cuddle, so I acknowledge that mistakes are going to happen, but I want to prevent them as much as possible. If it happens again in the near future, I'm going to have to cut off cuddling for a while.

We've discussed what to do about this, and we've decided that we're both going to be on the watch for potentially risky situations, that we're both willing to cut off cuddling if we have to, and that I'm going to be extra careful not to make another mistake.

I've learned from every one of my mistakes. I don't grab her hand anymore. I ask for it. I'm more careful with blankets. And I'm only going to caress the outside of her arm from now on. The question is what is the root of this issue and how do we, as a couple, prevent any such mistakes from happening again?

(Notice) I know a lot of people will ask why I don't want to touch my gf's boobs. The core of it is religious. God says to wait til marriage, so we are. But, aside from that, it's about honor. It's my responsibility to protect her and I'm the one hurting her. And she may go off to marry someone else someday and, if that happens, I don't want to take what is meant for him by touching her boobs before we're married. And even if those other reasons weren't real, I still wouldn't want to do it because she doesn't want me to and it's her body.

tl;dr: I've accidentally grazed my gf's boob three times in the past week and I want to know what we can do together to prevent that from happening again.

maskenfreiheit posted:

I (29/M) have lost all sexual attraction to my GF(23/f) (self.relationship_advice)

quote:

Fiance of 10 years slept with uncle for drugs

I feel like my entire world has been turned upside down and i don't know what to do anymore. I can't talk about what happened to anyone and i feel that i need to have a healthy discussion about my options.

I will try not to ramble while also giving enough background info as to have said Discussion.

So my (30m) fiance of 10 years (27f) and i have been in a fairly healthy relationship since we met. She and i have more in common than any other person I've yet to meet. She had a pretty severe drug habit which formed during the early years of our relationship. We do have 2 beautiful daughters together and have lived together for about 8 years.

Her drug of choice is Xanax (a horrible drug). We used to before the kids where born spend entire days driving around trying to find any opiates or benzos possible to feed our addiction. During these years we had many nights that turned out very hosed up ending in various sexual encounters with men and women. Neither of us regret these choices because they have formed us into the people we are today.

once we found out that she was pregnant, about 7 years ago, we both made attempts to get clean so as to ensure a safe, healthy environment to raise a child. Both of us struggled through our own demons and after a long 2 or so year period of being clean for a while, with an occasional relapse. We managed to kick the habit and live a somewhat normal life.

obviously over the years there have been times when we both have made a bad decision. But for the most part life was going well. Fast forward to this year. She had gone 5 years without driving due to an aggravated dui she had gotten before we sobered up. This made life extremely difficult for both of us as it limited the things that she was able to do with the kids while i was at work. So finally in the spring time this past year we saved the money to get her license back. This should have been a joyous time for both of us. However after a couple months i began to notice signs of her using Xanax again.

So i had noticed she had been spending considerably more time at her aunts house, which i didn't think much of because, well, it's family and we needn't usually think twice about a SO going to their families house for the day. Her aunt and husband have lived together yet separated for the past 5 years or so. I'm going to call him her uncle because that was the family dynamic i had been introduced to when we first met, and my fiance has a female cousin who is only a few years younger than she is. My fiance had grown up knowing this man as her uncle from about the age of 5. I should mention that the uncle has been known to be very sexually open as far as being bisexual and having an open relationship with the aunt for the last 5 or so years of their marriage. (And being open about the whole situation, at times almost too open... )

So about 6 weeks ago i came home to find my fiance passed out on the floor with her phone still in her hand. I clearly could tell she was intoxicated so i picked her up and carried her into the bedroom and put her in bed. This is when my life got turned upside down btw...

I had made the mistake of taking her phone and placing it on the nightstand when i noticed her text message app was open because she had been in the middle of a conversation. I looked at the screen to see a conversation between her and her uncle making plans to trade Xanax for sex depending on whether her time of the month was over in time for the weekend. This wasn't like hundreds of dollars worth of drugs, more like 10 dollars or so depending on the market.... TEN DOLLARS.

I'm shook to the core. I don't know what to do or how to process this. As anyone ever in a relationship will know we have had ups and downs but i never in a million years would have guessed that this was going on. I mean this, to me, is way way worse than any other flirting or cheating even that i have ever dealt with. We have both made mistakes. I'm very forgiving. But lately i feel as though things haven't been right.. And obviously i was right. I've talked to both her and the uncle about what happened. I basically got two different versions of "I'm a horrible person and i hate myself and blah blah blah" i feel like any amount of trust that we were grasping just slipped through my fingers. I don't understand. Why not just buy the drugs... Why does sex have to be transactional. This isn't the first time she has broken my trust... i just feel like if i can't trust her to go to her families house for the day without finding not only a means to get high but also a way to factor in sex WITH A FAMILY MEMBER AT THAT.

I know what i should do. But i also know that this isn't just my girlfriend but my best friend and the mother of my 2 little girls. I would be utterly devastated to break up, but i don't see our relationship ever being the same again. I don't think I'll be able to trust anyone for a long time.

Tl;dr fiance of ten years was trading sex for Xanax from her uncle. Cant talk to anyone irl due to stigma... need advice

Khorne posted:

$2k is pretty reasonable for a wedding ring

quote:

**tl;dr**: My [26M] (very new) Girlfriend [26F] of only a couple months is a self-titled/self-confessed 'Nymphomaniac' - I am not sure how to deal with it. I love and desire Sex just as much as the next man, would consider myself to have an average, if not, a little above average sex drive, but nothing too crazy and certainly not to her level, as is becoming very apparent. She wants (needs) sex almost all of the time, anywhere, any place and it's exhausting, emotionally draining and is having an impact on the general sustainability of my productive life. I love her very much but am hugely conflicted. How should I best approach this?

--

I had heard the term "Nymphomaniac" thrown around over the years, but when she brought it up in conversation when we were chatting via text (we met via a dating website), I had to Google it to be sure. It didn't initially scare me, so I just went with it, not knowing any better. Maybe that should have been a red flag; I don't know.


Taking it back a few steps, as mentioned above, we met via a dating website (not Tinder) and matched quite highly (according to the algorithms) her profile read well, and we seemed to have a lot in common. We are of same age too. We instantly hit it off; we shared similar childhood stories, very similar wants and goals from life and a future; an instant chemistry, without a doubt. Those butterflies you got when you were a kid kinda situation.


We quickly escalated it from text to phone call and then on to Skype over like a one to two week period. We would spend hours a day just talking. I fell head over heels in love with her to be honest, before I even met her. The feeling was mutual for her too.


Naturally, we then met in person. The feelings we had developed created a magical first encounter, it was overwhelmingly amazing. We met with a passionate hug and pretty much on to a french-kissing session.


We had two dates before we had Sex, but the sexual tension was building, in a good way, long beforehand.


We had Dinner out in a beautiful, romantic restaurant(s) the first few dates, followed by passionate kissing, accompanied by thigh rubbing, playfully biting and neck kissing. (Very intense, very exciting)


She had these, what I can only describe as, borderline scary, "come to bed" eyes with a laugh that was just as intense which surfaced when we were making out. (another red flag?)


Without making this long-winded and talking through it all play by play, we met up for the third date, and suffice to say, skipped the meal and went straight to the bedroom.


Sexually compatible and mutual satisfaction on both sides. We went for countless rounds, went through a whole box of condoms (I wish I were joking) and pretty much stayed up all night talking and going at it. I was putting out no problem, as it had been a while since I had sex at that point. She was the driving force; I probably would have passed out after round 3 or 4.


I didn't overthink the first night at all though, other than the fact that it was amazing, passionate and chalked the intense sex up to a new experience for me, thinking it would naturally relax into a more regular "routine" as time went on.


We continued to go on dates, We obviously met up often and hung out. If I wasn't physically with her, I was talking on the phone or texting her. I met some of her Family; she met some of mine. All was going well.


During all of this, the sex was as intense as night one; I was still enjoying it as it was a new experience for me, but, after about a month of it non stop, this is where things started to go "red flag".


She wants sex all of the time. Close to as vital to her as breathing is. She will initiate it anywhere, any place. It's led to some awkward experiences in public. She will wake me up in the middle of the night for sex. Sometimes I wake up to her just sitting on top of me, with those "come to bed eyes." - It was cute/funny at first, but now it's getting a little scary. I work a 9 to 5 office job, so I have to be up early in the mornings, and presentable.


When we are going at it, she will climax, I will follow suit, and then we take a breather, but no sooner have we stopped, does she want to go again. I obviously don't need to explain the particulars of the male reproductive process, but sometimes, there is nothing "left in the tank" yet she still want's to go at, and I am just exhausted.


I have attempted to mention it recently, which just caused her to get all emotional, defensive and, no other way to put it, other than "childish" - She won't talk about it with me like an adult.


She has also thrown terms at me such as that I have a low libido, questioned my manhood and even my sexuality (!!) - these gestures only come up when I won't (cant) put out.


I also have concerns, and perhaps I am overthinking it now, but can't help it - that she is just saying what I want to hear so I will give her the sex. Not sure really. My judgement is probably crowded with exhaustion.


I have really strong feelings for her, she is smoking hot, but the level of sex is unsustainable, I am exhausted and on the verge of breaking down, to be honest.


Help. What's the best way to approach this?

Outrail posted:

What? They'd refuse to allow an abortion because she's too young? Wtf.

Caganer posted:

Theophany posted:

DeBeers really did a number on us all.

Theophany posted:

The ad agency that came up with the campaign 'a diamond is forever' is long gone and good loving riddance.

Deformed Church posted:

I'm in the UK and all the women on my office insist the three month rule is important. It's a discussion we've had several times and I've lost every time.

blugu64 posted:

Please link me to the clock museum

Doggles posted:

Me [23F] with my "office nemesis" [20sF]; she slept with my boyfriend and now won't stop apologizing about it, how do I make her stop?

Simply Simon posted:

I was super confused as to why people were reacting so strongly to the "free meal" thing because I assumed that was just some kind of slang for "I can hit this guy up to 'snack on' [sexually] whenever I want niiiice", which I'd have been fine with after "three weeks and taking it slow". Then I re-read the OP and he only says in the final sentence that "she's using me for free dinners", so I guess during the entire thing of his outrage, I should have just assumed that he was the one paying for the dinners?

I think I'm too modern, it never occured to me that OBVIOUSLY he was paying for her and the meal was meant LITERALLY...

Bored posted:

Brb. Patenting this before you do.

quote:

What can I do to prevent this from happening? I don't have much extra money (ex hasn't paid child support in almost 7 years) so I'd prefer to not get a lawyer if I don't have to.